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Too Full to Fuck You can’t always make room for a dick. Especially if you’ve eaten dessert.

 

I love to eat (ever since I got over my fear of eating). I tend to eat until I feel sick. Similar to how people test their alcohol consumption to see how much they can drink without puk­ing, I’ve tested how much food I can eat and still fuck. On nights I know I’m going to be having sex, of course I eat less, which is annoying but in the end it’s worth it, because you get to have sex and feel good and not bloated while having it. This — and the fact that you shaved for no reason — is why being flaked on sucks, especially for girls, because in antici­pation of hanging out, we ate just one piece of pizza instead of the regular four, and now it’s late and we’re hungry and we didn’t even get laid. Although not eating and then getting flaked on is still preferable to the times where we eat a shit­ load and then randomly get asked to hang out. This is most distressing because there is almost nothing in the world we wouldn’t drop to spend time with our crush. The only rea­son we will say no to a spontaneous hang is because it’s after dinner and we don’t feel hot. It will pain us to say no for this reason, but trust me, we will.

Too Full to Fuck You can’t always make room for a dick. Especially if you’ve eaten dessert.

Gif: it's not poop it's candy. 17-Nov-2020

Tags: Advice, Anal, Choices, Environment, Food, Illness, Men, Men In Charge, Nature, Self-esteem, Sex, Weird, Woman's Rights

Filed under: Health/Food

17-Nov-2020


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