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Siren (2018-) Woof

The sea bursts with trans merms, foreign landers and common ground.

The throuple endangers itself for the esteem of want and need.

Eline Powell stamped her signature on otherworldly and frightening beauty.

An interracial cast that realistically blends.

The mythology holes don't stop me from digging it.

The aqua war delivered TV best.

The characters can't stop me from caring for it.

Bye.

 26-Jun-2020
Women own the water that men feed from.

It's an analogy for many things but the message is to respect all life.

Beautiful colors of the universe are united to show us their TV Q.

The daddies are pretty big things, rescuing respectfully and allowing the women, heroism.

The throuple has me banging my head. It's hot, unique, eek and curious.

The mythology is well done, the effects don't suck and my favorite merman is chocolate. 23-Jun-2020
S1E3. I'm getting Kyle XY jitters along with Carrie mermaid spooks. It takes us away from the muck and asks that we be entertained. 16-Jun-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Action, Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Creepy, Director's Touch, Drama, From Another Planet, Fun, Hot Swatch, Relationships, Scary, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet Dick Energy, Tough, Writ Tight

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26-Jun-2020


Love, Victor (2020-) Arf

E6-10. Performer TV IQ is high enough to rise above the suds, convey the right emotions, make us addicted and not drown from the weight of the soap. 18-Jun-2020
S1E5. It observes and overprotects its subject. It theorizes that problems only graze and that all people are inherently capable of understanding. Fables only grant the curious teen, added hurt on their venture. I'd rather tell it, solve it and not wait for the miracle to happen. 17-Jun-2020

Tags: 2020s, Amiable, By the Numbers, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Drama, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Manipulation, Political, Predictable, Relationships, Star Watt, Sweet, Timid, Twinkie, Wit Snit, Writ For Short Attn Spans

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18-Jun-2020


Below Deck: Sailing Yacht (2020-) ArfUpgradeWoof

Jen protested and slimed with the cook.

Georgia celebrated freedom by calling Jen a bully and telling her bff that she had designs on her husband. She goes Love Island and tells daddy too.

Paget's dick-o-meter flew in so many directions, I thought he was going to explode. Every time he got close to Ciara, the meter resisted, it was pointing elsewhere and he made it obvious. The moment when his meter is pointed straight at her (his worth,) is priceless.

Happy deck grew on me.

Adam's chirpiness can come off as secretly plotting.

Byron finally got to go home and put all those nasty thoughts to rest.

Madison is a bright spot that makes me laugh.

The captain earned his daddy stripes. 29-May-2020
The dysfunctional guests creeped and Popeye politely reprimanded Olive Oyl for spending too much time on Adam's face and she reciprocated by using her female empowerment to rampage against her underlings and proclaiming that man worship prioritizes all job responsibilities. 19-May-2020
Adam got horny again.

Women are impeded from good work with a penis in their face.

Madison's stab at Kim and Kanye, beheaded.

Happy deck's pajama bulge might warrant why he's happy.

Ciara couldn't curtail her man so she turned in a female colleague. Brava! That's empowerment. 11-May-2020
Captain had his spinach and almost blew the boat over.

Madison only bitched for half the show. Joy.

Georgia needs to drop her mic.

Parker in his skivvies. I think I found Georgia's mic.

Jenna was groundhogging... miscommunication with man, over and over.

Come on Ciara, you can take her.

Adam. He only found his trousers after cuming inside Jenna. She is safe until the next cycle.

LOL. 05-May-2020
A dangerous threesome is about to explode. May the best woman win? Really?

Georgia, you shouldn't flirt if it changes the flow.

Madison appeared to be chill, creating negative balls of energy to allow us to perceive and laugh at the ridiculous circumstances they are in but she's being ghost boated because she truly truly believes it.

Byron doesn't talk much but gives the impression that he's always thinking about sex.

Adam didn't realize that women appreciate the money put into getting them flowers. It has nothing to do with flowers.

There is way too much happiness emanating from the new deck.

The boat was stocked with super Cleopatras on tiptoe allowing macho toxicity to beg for something women no longer give. The primary pulled away from a hug before giving it and handed the captain the envelope on the second reach. That felt very supreme.

Alas, the best was saved for last, as the cameraman went Hitchcock and directed Adam's rampage like the conversations Norman Bates had with his mother. If it was true, it was sadly hilarious. 28-Apr-2020
Money solved all their problems.

The only funny the brutes laid out was calling chef, Ted Bundy. The saddest thing chef did was exhibit why. 17-Mar-2020
The chugalug got invaded by woke tacks radiating American political correctness as growled on social media. They use the black guy to intimidate the boat, they have no respect for work, time, money or sex and the show needs to punish them for it. I know that cameramen don't interfere but under these circumstances they have to. Is that a rule now?

(I think the chief stew and the chef get paid extra to hookup.) 10-Mar-2020
Sailing is an experience that whelms whilst you're doing it. Watching people and things keel over only titillates once.

The crew is intent on capturing attention but they are bland fish hooked on a line.

Pro reproduction banishment conversations are welcome. 26-Feb-2020

Tags: 2020s, By the Numbers, Camp, Drama, Fatigue, Overcooked, Reality, Relationships, Showy, Shrill Act, Travel

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29-May-2020


House of Flowers (2018) HowlDowngrade

S3. They smeared dark paint and punched holes into what could have been a masterpiece. Everything we cherished was punished, everything celebrated, got cursed and everything funny, nagged. The backstory was a cheap attempt to keep us interested in the life of a woman that presently doesn't exist. It's hurtful and pointless. Everything gay has become annoyance and everything Paulina De La Mora has been shredded. The only thing left is the frame. 29-May-2020
Scouring the family axis with joy. 02-Oct-2019

Tags: 2010s, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Drama, Elegance, Foreign, Funny, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Hot Swatch, Mystery, Relationships, Romance, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense, Tacky, Tired, Twisty, Wit Snit, Writ Tough

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29-May-2020


Dead To Me (2019-) Woof

All coincidences aside, its power resonated from the word, the emotion and the performance. Ms. Applegate rocketed to combustion. Good job. 20-May-2020
I was riveted by Christina's triumph in irritation and kickback, profiling an uneventful marriage founded on the success of falsehoods. James Marsden illustrates the beauty of an asshole. 30-May-2019

Tags: 2010s, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Great Acting, Heart Writ, Heartbreaking, Hot Swatch, Mystery, Overcooked, Relationships, Sentimental, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Twisty, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tough, Writ w/Possibilities

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20-May-2020


Camp Getaway (2020-) No MoonsEarly Exit

It needs a serial killer. 13-May-2020

Tags: 2020s, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Discomfort, Ear Prick, Early Exit, Eye Gouge, Fake, Fantasy, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Grating, Insulting, Juvenile, Out of Place, Reality, Relationships, Sexist, Shrill Act, Silly, Static, Tacky, Warbly

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13-May-2020


Never Have I Ever (2020-) BitesEarly Exit

Female driven fairytale of teen empowerment. To obtain such merit, a girl must prioritize "the shortcuts," suppress the lower stereotypes, pounce on a superior royal animal and have it grant her that royal fucking that will liberate her. (So, all girls think.) I don't remember kids talking like this, I hope kids aren't talking like this and I definitely hope they don't start. One episode of unawareness, lack of emotional study and an honest laugh, had me bolting. In fairytales there are no lessons without a witch.

Niecy Nash glimmered gingerly. 08-May-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Comedy, Cultural, Drama, Early Exit, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Insulting, Juvenile, Maddening, Manipulation, Out of Place, Overcooked, Political, Preachy, Predictable, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Tired, Unfunny, Warbly, Writ For Short Attn Spans

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08-May-2020


Summer House (2017-) Whimper

Every party is a cleanse for every dream that wont come true. 07-May-2020
Truth party games. Wow, they really work.

The girls are friends again until the next bout of horniness trumps it. 01-May-2020
The green giant has sexual dysfunction and old people getting it on, is sick. 23-Apr-2020
Had no idea there was clamor for more. It's back to the future where we get to see grandpappy hook-ups in real time. "Me too" is a charity, feminine wiles are an exaltation, closets are for sex not coming out, women love big things, men are horny and crass mugs that only hold intelligent conversations whilst on the hunt and remain stupid after they fox it. I have no idea what they represent but my generation is enthralled and disturbed. 13-Mar-2020
A band-aid of happy endings. 29-Jul-2019
The gay got replaced by a floaty and a scary virgin. The elders are not aging gracefully and the show has gone from being my chore radio to white noise. When you watch reality TV you get to experience the damage our parents wrought. 23-Jul-2019
- Supreme Ken Doll (Kyle) needs to explore why he prefers living in a blur
- Waiting is a virtue (Amanda) - only if you know what you're waiting for
- Lindsay realized that change only happens when you apply it to yourself. Good for her
- The salt (Danielle) was overtaken by hot peppers (twins)
- The inactive (Stephen) needs to divert his hostility towards his parents. They are the reason he can't move forward
- The blistering giant's (Carl) self awareness allows him to take from life easily 19-Jul-2019
In season two they added salt to mild, endowed the gay with a bitch rap and the desperation from separation (relationships/careers) was dialed up a notch. Stephen needs to accept his het counterpart like he'd like to be. If he's really a friend he would appreciate Carl's flamboyance and his disregard for what people think of him. Hotness attracts men. Hot shit spills over. Unless you only have eyes for him...that's a different problem. 15-Jul-2019
It does stereotype well. Twins are still annoying, blondes are vacant, the gay needs an apron, the ex-fatboy is out for revenge and the women still have no clue what's flashing in a man's face. The man knows. Mind boggling. I may become obsessed by it or immune. 12-Jul-2019

Tags: 2010s, Camp, Cliche, Fake, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Incomprehensible, Juvenile, Overcooked, Reality, Relationships, Shrill Act, Tacky, Weird

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07-May-2020


Normal People (2020-) BitesEarly Exit

I quit after two episodes for its robotic love story and for making a half, feel like a full hour. If its purpose is to instruct us on how to navigate teen angst, sex and love, I can't empathize. By twelve, I and most of my brethren were already bona fide sluts (thanks, daddies) and my input wasn't necessary. It reeks of social parenting, enforcement and naive privilege. The writers believe that if you preach hard enough, it will spill into reality. Daisy Edgar-Jones is neither ugly, weirdly or enticing enough to elaborate on an inconsistent sketch of a girl who is written to be all of those things. It's hypocritical. Paul Mescal is wasting his beautiful ass, nobody else matters and nothing happens. 05-May-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Cliche, Drama, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Juvenile, Maddening, Manipulation, Out of Place, Preachy, Relationships, Squish Alert, Static, Talk, Tedium, Timid, Tired, Warbly, Weird

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05-May-2020


One Day at a Time (2017-) HowlUpgradeFull Moon

I will always have affection for these people but I truly hope they find that thing this season lost. 04-May-2020
S4E3. E1 and E2 had me worried. It was loud and high strung in celebration of a second chance, feeling like a parody of itself. Episode 3 brought masturbation realness and hilarity, peak character delight and mama diva (Moreno) steal moments. The hardest I've laughed all year. 10-Apr-2020
All about relationships. Gracias. 03-Mar-2019
Motivating argument about the rules modern life coerces. Proficiently displayed, adoringly regarded and stamping the sitcom with the purpose TV forgot. 13-Feb-2019
Justina Machado is excellent and Rita Moreno embodies everything we miss about a Golden Girl. They've added superior daddy squish and the support is amiable reinforcement. Cheers. 01-Mar-2018
At first glance, you are inclined to think that this is an exploitation of a classic and respected series with token latino stereotypes. By the fourth episode you realize that it chose this community to depict because it needs updating the most and it feeds right into the original's claim. It's hard raising a latin family when the men are scarce and the women try to empower themselves at the cost of tradition. There are times you will be transported to all those arguments Lear presented between classic characters, fair to each but being persistent that the last word goes to the changing present. Justina Machado plays Penelope Alvarez with the same amount as distraught, parental overprotection and survivor's challenge that Bonnie Franklin's Ann Romano did. Rita Moreno's accent is old fashioned pastiche but she is a full character, beloved and is having a helluva time making us laugh. The kids aspire for realness instead of cute and Schneider is cute without the creep. 30-Jan-2017

Tags: 2010s, Adorable, Beautiful, Best In Comedy, Best In Gay, Classic, Comedy, Cultural, Cute, Daddy Squish, Dance, Dating, Director Art, Drama, Elegance, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Gaycon, Great Acting, Heart Writ, Hot Swatch, Lesbian, Music Rocks, Nostalgic, Political, Reality, Romance, Sentimental, Special, Squish Alert, Star Power, Star Watt, Sweet, Twinkie, Twisty, Wit Snit, Writ Tight, Writ Tough

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04-May-2020


Westworld (2016-) Woof

In order for a robot to gain more humanity, humans must become more robotic. (I think we're there.) 04-May-2020
Its undoing is its failure to convince us why the robots have so much human emotion. If you can't digitally master it, our brains will not conceive it.

Its spite and success is due to a brilliant presentation, staggering mamas and devastating daddies.

Wood gives Dolores the stature of uniqueness and the stoic elegance necessary to keep her fascinating but it's time for her to get her machine on.

Ed Harris. Daddy cowboy of legend. Gives great face, looks fun in bed and he's a cowboy.

Jeffrey Wright. This is the daddy you get high with. Great ideas and crazy sex.

Thandie Newton. Her act is fit and she'd be the action-figure I would buy if I was twelve.

Luke Hemsworth. A Hemsworth pillow. He's a snuggle daddy with survival skills.

Tessa Thompson. Proud to have her on any team.

Aaron Paul. Delicate daddy with violent tendencies and dedication or Next Door Daddy.

Vincent Cassell. Daddy, "yeah, I'd fuck him."

The fight scenes enlivened, real robots ignited and the future looked bright. (We'll see how they fuck it up.)
 01-May-2020
We feast on a most delectable future whilst our brains ping pong. Wright daddied up, Wood is glam assassin, Paul does his thing and Newton yums. 17-Mar-2020

Tags: 2020s, Action, Chemistry, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Elegance, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Pretty, Revenge, Sci-Fi, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough

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04-May-2020


Hollywood (2020-) Whimper

Hollywood magic starts in bed.

A propaganda film correcting past inequalities by imposing modern thoughts and politics into the mouth of history.

It preaches incessantly because we can no longer be inspired by people's lives as they lived it but how we now prefer it. (Good change comes when we learn from past mistakes, not when we erase them.)

Diversity exists as a pulpit, never integrating or understanding their purpose. Brother and sister needed to bring the humility, homework and incandescence that would compel us to believe they deserve the success they aspire to. Ms. Wong (Michelle Krusiec) completed her homework.

Rock Hudson, Vivien Leigh and Tallulah Bankhead portrayals. The ginormity of man beauty that was the Rock, is diminished when his facsimile stands shoulder to shoulder with Mira Sorvino and when he portrays him like a dork. Vivien was a cartoon transformer shifting from beauty to accent in a manic state. She needed to be all of it. Tallulah is actually very simple to study. You watch her one hour episode of I Love Lucy and follow it up with Bette Davis in All About Eve, legitimizing her. Too busy, huh?

The film within a film seemed abysmal.

I found it offensive that a black woman was portraying a white woman's life. It's like a man portraying a trans.

Free rein to rearrange is exciting only if it follows the rules of its generation. 03-May-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Camp, Cliche, Discomfort, Drama, Fatigue, Gay, History, Insulting, Manipulation, Out of Place, Over the Top, Overcooked, Political, Repetitive, Sap, Star Watt, Static, Talk, Tedium, Timid, Tired, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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03-May-2020


District (2018) Arf

A secret society that grants community boys access to a fruitful life in exchange for a diddle here and there. It's interesting, experimental and occupied by super fit daddies with future talent. 02-May-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Chemistry, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Gay, Hot Swatch, Political, Relationships, Star Watt, Words Spoke

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02-May-2020


After Life (2019-) Howl

Still depressed, funny and sweet. Its heart grew wider. 01-May-2020
Gervais profiles the catabolic generation and spins their sadness into comical whimsy. He is perfect denouncing life and burning it. It's a reality few can see. It talks maturely about aging, death, suicide, loneliness and contempt for the life that bore it. (Ricky's witticisms are wicked clatter.) 17-Feb-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Accident Watch, Brutal, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Political, Star Watt, Sweet, Tacky, Tough, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tight, Writ Tough

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01-May-2020


Bad Education (2020) Howl

The face of the righteous has a melting soul.

Hugh is big daddy, fulfilling a demanding feat. He teases us with his nice boy swag, making us feel comfortable, ripping layers and gnawing at his mentality. He floors like a man realizing his obsession is a sick heart aching for love of any kind.

Janney's gift is to steal acts, to be good or to be great. She is all.

Ray Romano is the grand daddy of kvetch, owning it with common sense and delivering it like a real person.

Geraldine Viswanathan displayed the smarts and determination the character needed.

The support was a menage of cultural brilliance.

Awkward, tricky and... bam!

(Society builds too much pressure in people.)
 30-Apr-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Chemistry, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fun Acting, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Hot Swatch, Mystery, Political, Psychological, Representing, Sentimental, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tight, Writ Tough

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30-Apr-2020




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