All Posts Tagged as 'Camp'
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Our Little Secret (2024)
Lindsay Lohan made me realize why charismatic actors lose their mojo. Are they uncomfortable and think that everyone is going to judge every word they say? Yes. I want her to flare up again. She's almost there. She needs a challenge. My favorite fairy legend wastes her magic on shitty lines. If the writers have nothing valid for her to say, let her sing. Ian Hardy was a trip. I couldn't place him. He was that cutie asshole that always irked me, for sure. Of course, he was the perverted teacher that dated his underage students on PLL. Every time he smirked he resurrected a part of Norman Bates. The idea that a woman would want to keep that she dated a Darren Stephens the Second type a secret was astonishing. Just because it's fluff doesn't mean we shouldn't try to say something. 02-Dec-2024
Merry Men, The (2024)
There's more than stupidity going on here. The cast is amiable and hardworking. Britt is a misdiagnosed charmer. Prattes legs were mesmerizing, it's fun to see old witches again, Maxwell Caulfield's moment was a go daddy thing, Chad Michael Murray had the body, the robotics, enthusiasm and Farrah's hair. They derailed the "hate at first love" train and depicted how people really get together. I didn't stay for the pancakes but I waited for the bacon. Merry whatever the fucks! 25-Nov-2024
Trap (2024)
Hartnett's choice of psycho was goofy and almost unbearable to watch. The close-ups where he talks directly into the camera were off-putting and silly. The nepo concert felt endless and obvious. The father/daughter dynamic was thin and cardboard. They didn't show how Josh got from one place to another, he was just there. All the answers landed so simply that it trashed the clues. The twist was great as a spoken word but without presentation it's null. The home life doesn't enter until the end when we no longer give a fuck. Maybe it should have started there and include the daughter in the plot. She realizes he's psycho and has to kill him. But how?! 27-Oct-2024
Like A Prayer - Madonna
Movie Version
Suit Up
Hung Up
X-Men Origins
Gambit...
Hugh
Deadpool dance
Deadpool vs.
Wolverine dance
All...
Late Night With The Devil (2023)
In order for the premise to thrive, the guests must shine. The little girl was inspired by the Scary movie franchise. The host had the most but was overshadowed by ponderous material. Support did not attempt to break a stereotypical shell to elicit empathy or further their characters. It didn't intrigue me, convince me or frighten me. (My mother wins most awesomemest possession of a devil in realtime.) It's almost impossible to recreate magic that only happens once in a lifetime. 22-Oct-2024
Bromans UK (2017-)
An International Male catalog with skimpy naked men that should be licked. 31-Aug-2024
Love Island UK (2019-)
Women are pursuing these motherfuckers because there is a cash prize at the end, correct? I don't remember Reuben. There was nothing to latch onto. Josh must choose to be blacker or whiter. Yes, I had a doll that looked like Blade. Hugo combs his hair in reverse. I bet Konnor is a fantastic one nighter. Will must be hung. Joey is a doll. Sean is Jimmy Oleson. Ayo, we pray for you. I would have barbecued Trey like he was a lobster. Moziah reeks of beauty and nature. Ciaran has too many identities going on. 11-Jul-2024
House of Heat (2024-)
They look, talk and walk like ducks but don't like being called ducks. Only Fans creators are thrust inside a fish tank so they can observe, teach and grow their businesses. Some peel their clothes off while others tease it. Everyone is judgmental, scared and hostile. It was difficult to side with anyone because a lot of them believe they have the answer to surviving the mess they're in. Chase's beauty kept melting off the more he talked. The gay couple was so united in their bond that there was no space to breathe. They clung dependently like Venom and Hardy. The straight couple only had sex with each other on camera. They were special. She wanted to hold on to chastity. Any man that needs to fuck so many times a day already cheated and had the threesome she denied him. Brother gay with an appealing body needed to purse his lips, not glow them. The arguments are loud, repetitive and frustrating. Maybe the creators will realize the answer when they are outside the box. I don't know the answer but I know how it ends. The women questioned everything and added motives later. We never got an answer to the smelly pussygate dilemma. Was she sexually violated or were men just being themselves? Is that the reason we have to label everything? To distance ourselves from others? They close every argument like there will be a sequel. I wish my brain would function as fluidly as these creators. It made the cuckoo in my head clock pop. They are killing the mystery of the fantasy by telling too much. 29-Jul-2024
Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire (2024)
I've outgrown this franchise. Only a kid's imagination can enjoy it because the ideas no longer allow adults to unwind. There isn't much to distinguish the brother from the sister. They are still rocking Ripley curls, their gender is unidentifiable and the girl has all the brains. Carrie Coon comes off as a side of beef instead of a serious actress. Paul Rudd was floating in the multiverse. Either nobody wanted to be in the same frame as Bill Murray or he really wasn't there. He was missing in many key shots. Patton Oswalt didn't sound like a mythical bird and cannot replace Rick Moranis. Ernie, Annie and Dan are safe. Movie ghost technology hasn't evolved since Casper and reviving a demon doesn't satisfy the theme. It had no whimsy, imagination or heart. 24-Jul-2024
Boys, The (2019-)
Besides the maestro, Starlight's rejuvenation was my favorite thing. 22-Jul-2024
Homefucker took twitch to its ultimate, grew from it and became remarkable. Someone invited Smirk to the party so he can curse it? He's still smirking away and sounding like a condescending cunt. The twist befits him like a glove. Yes, I would submit to his gravelly words and old man charms. Is that all A-Train or are there other plastics involved? Nice. Mama's Milk has the right amount of daddy issues. Kimiko and Frenchie are still a power couple even though Frenchie has accent disabilities. Star watt. Starlight's abilities were stifled. The series made me realize that Karl Urban can be fun. Quaid can get away with a lot. Sage was waiting for this all her life and she's acing it. The Deep is reenacting some personal memories. Respect. There are stalling tactics that defy reason. The enemies keep bumping into each other but nobody keeps the promise to slaughter the other. One explanation should suffice. Nepo Homelander is sending Damien vibes. Anthony Starr has a grip on us. 12-Jul-2024
Twitch daddy twitch. 24-Jun-2022
The season belongs to daddy Homefucker. 24-Jun-2022
Shue clenches frustration devoutly, Starr chomps evil gleefully and the end punctuated surprisingly. 26-Aug-2019
Graduating superheroes to the next level...consequences. 17-Aug-2019
Love Island (2019-)
Gays undercover have no idea how to deal with female toxicity. 06-Aug-2021
Gays undercover are still saving women. Men with sexual dysfunctions agreed to remain in their original coupling. Men think women are stupider than them because they believe everything they say. 30-Jul-2021
S3E9. The men are playing football, faking the women into doing behind the scenes porn in front of the team, their family and friends. Gay boys are undercover to make sure the rejected puppies don't get tackled. It's cheating but the show has an image to uphold. May the best cock win! 26-Jul-2021
Perfect Match (2023-)
Finale. Nick rocked a shorts suit and I liked it. The stylist that decided to put long pants on Harry should've been reprimanded. Mama mia worked extra shifts so as not to return home to her daughter. I think I know why I made my GI Joe Kaz a bottom. Bryton won the thigh competition and a motorboat invitation. If Nigel were a GI Joe I would play with him. Izzy's date with Jessica consisted of him being an upside down Spider-Man dripping sweat down her throat. It all went downhill fast. He came to life at the party and looked like an adorable in shorts and white socks. Prince Eric tried to convince the voters that he was in love with his mermaid. She wasn't just a catch. The mermaid was caught off guard and sounded even phonier. The contestants voted with their hearts and surprised everyone. It had an I hate you all vibe. 22-Jun-2024
Hot diggity damn, Nick! Full shots of hunky men sitting in shorts while confessing, was priceless. Nick was naughty. Jess is so independent that she can raise her daughter without ever being seen. Harry. Why do men always have to explain themselves? Harry kept repeating Jess' daughter's name like he knew her for years so she would believe him and fall in love. "Jess, fuck his brains out until he can't walk but do not bring him home." All Harry wants is a luxurious leg massage and to be reminded of how beautiful they are. The men stood up for themselves by being quiet. The girls fought amongst their own with no perfect match to support them. When Kaz decided to sample, I understood his psychology. Beauty belongs to everyone. Perfect match should see him alone at toga parties. The blonde with the tresses and the big eyes looks like Emma Stone. Prince Eric's mindset lacked etiquette and consideration. A shark. Izzy did his best. He sort of memorized the producer's script and there were cue cards everywhere he looked but dude couldn't stop being awkward. I still dig the face. 15-Jun-2024
I always returned G.I. Joe Kaz to his manly state. Even though I washed the make-up off there were shadows. The moment Pazuzu noticed, G.I. Joe Kaz mysteriously disappeared. 08-Jun-2024
S2E2-5. Harry was not stirring my pot until I noticed his thigh to leg ratio. I boiled, my lid began to shake, float and rise. I noticed that there was a lot of that. It almost repaired my soul. When Jessica confessed to having a child, Harry asked where she was. Exactly! We've seen more of Jessica than her daughter has. Prince Eric from an off-broadway production of The Little Mermaid was returned to sea many times but somebody always rescued him. Fuck, I'd probably rescue him too if he didn't talk. I will ask no questions before night, night and I need to call him Eric. The sea is full of mermaids. My other G.I. Joe doll looked like Kaz. He was a soldier in green combats. I tore up his uniform, created a wig out of his undershirt, painted his face and made G.I. Joe Nick fuck the shit out of him. 08-Jun-2024
S2E2. Ack! 08-Jun-2024
S2E1. We don't watch Izzy because of the way he talks, we just want to lick him and squish him. Izzy hooked up with a goddess, it took him 23 minutes to finish. He spent at least 20 minutes in the bathroom and three minutes convincing her it would be good for her career. Nick almost lifted his skirt. Thighs for a later episode? Boy, he's got some daddy legs. Nice. He looked like one of the G.I. Joes I played with as a kid but shinier. Some cocky dink bragged that he was gifted a cookie for providing a great fuck. Dude, I got a whole house and did nothing! Stevan's tattoos were more aggressive than he was. The soft boys were being traded for angry chokesters they can't control. Women have permission to be promiscuous if they sign off on it. 08-Jun-2024
Something tells me that most of the men and half the women, would have found a perfect match had they cloned Francesca. Abbey decided to strip the thighmaster of his crown and knight him a dick. 02-Mar-2023
A questionable sex partner sort of dumped Francesca. Yippee! He did it so he could stay and torture the fuck out of the man inside her. In the last aired episode he shaved his body to look more like a bitch. A gorgeous virgin who promises sex only in marriage is mandating that a partner suffer poor sex for the rest of their lives. He's not a lover, he's your brother. 24-Feb-2023
They should give camera people a special award for rewarding viewers with juicy thigh shots. The party started as soon as the Thigh King twitched in his shorts. They were everywhere. I haven't caught up yet but I hope somebody dumps Francesca. All she's doing is trying on different dicks. Like they were dresses at a bargain basement store. That poor sad flat black boy. 22-Feb-2023
I Kissed A Boy (2023-)
S1E6. There are more pronouns than there are twinks. Ben was an acquired taste with monkey energy. Josh felt out of place cruising non-homosexual gays. Ollie would be hotter if he didn't hike up his pants like Fred Mertz. Fred Gwynne is a top! Somebody is breathing the life out of someone who hates cats for a visa. Painted nails on men reminds me of Frankenstein. 19-Jun-2024
Hitman (2024)
I always thought Glen Powell was cute and up for anything. The film is devoid of action and unlike an episode of Police Woman. Chemistry almost always works when a latina is involved. The passion seemed legitimate. Powell kept donning disguises like he was at a Shakespeare festival. I've never seen an actor so relaxed and ready. Ryan Reynolds does not always have to play Deadpool. He was having fun, it was infectious and he saved a fluff piece. 11-Jun-2024
Mean Girls (2023)
A rom-com is conversion therapy for those who don't believe in fairy tales. I saw a handheld camera at the beginning and almost blacked out but then something cute happened. It moved like Grease and had the aroma of a pink lady. It kept me in with mixed results. The music had word limitations and they repeated nonsensical lines that make only cartoon baby sharks squeak. Was no thesaurus available when the music was written? The mean girls were lame and avenged by dorky plans. The cast was bubbly. The lesson was that anybody can be a mean girl. You fix her by allowing her to steal someone else's hot dick to fuck and hope she never calls you again. 10-Jun-2024