All Posts Tagged as '2010s'
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Married At First Sight (2014-)
Chris explained to Pastor Cal that the reason he was explosive on the show is because they set him up with a grenade. I wished El Pastor would have utilized some of the cheap scenery and bashed him with it. The experts were so professional that it felt like they were reading my mind. Virginia and Erik. One of the disadvantages of being a daddy is you get to watch your little girl go on dates and come home plastered. Haley and Jacob. All I heard were inner screams during Haley's therapy session. "If he touches me again...I'll scream...I swear it!" Oooh maybe he's CIA. Clara and Ryan. Clara, don't beg for sex. Men who make their partners wait for sex usually suck at it. She needs to renew her contract and corral herself the tallest man of her dreams. Briana and Vincent. Ricky Ricardo schemed to get Lucy to agree to let him sleep late with his newly conceptualized financial budget. Lucy swallowed the budget like a seal eating fish. When Briana told Vincent that she was afraid to have children, all was still except for the profanities swirling in his head. Well-played ladies! 08-Apr-2021
The unmentionable couple. His voice makes me put a lock on my ass even though it splits her vagina. Go figure. Alligator dick is making her look like a stupid horny cheerleader. Ryan and Clara. Bottom boy doesn't know how to satisfy a woman. A horny hillbilly doesn't help. Experts need to set up "gay alerts" with butchy lesbians like the Australian version. (It wakes up identity at supreme velocity.) Jacob and Haley. Herman Munster and any strange white woman down the street. Haley needs to stop signing NDAs. Besides a two incher, a fast cummer or an accidental choker, I don't understand the dilemma. Did he confuse the meaning of cunnilingus? Did he make her lick his hairy ass? Did he not wipe? We wanna know. Erik and Virginia. There is no life for her without her drunk fuck buddies. They're lords of her ring. Old daddy showed "wife duly fuck" appreciation by taking her flying. Vincent and Briana. It feels like he's faking it. His insecurities can't solidify love. 24-Mar-2021
The show let the dogs out so Doctora Viviana could pet them. See, she likes animals, just not cats. There was a harrowing moment when Haley's adorable dog was seen judging Viviana but she caught him and gave him stink-eye. The dog magically disappeared. Hailey and Jacob. Dude, she's been acting like this ever since you fucked her. There are two types of screams in the world and her aura ain't spelling delighted. 18-Mar-2021
Pleasantries are spoiled by disappointments. It parodies all fairytales then drenches them with honey. Wilmer Valderrama is drawn like a long faced witch with big dick attitude and no substance. The brides are Godzilla stupid but the music is nice and the singing is delightful. Long-faced cartoons are not charming. 05-Apr-2021
90 Day Fiance (2014-)
"The Boy" read the Russian incantation that turns him into a doll during his wedding ceremony. Mike seems to be the only cast member to have understood the irony of The Americans. Natalie freaked out about the fat fuck not marrying her like they were giving out Emmys for it. "Best Outburst By A Communist" in the reality TV genre. 28-Mar-2021
It no longer seems viable that the main purpose of the show is to celebrate interracial marriage. It's a business contract. Men who have trouble corralling local women have to go abroad to find a strong woman willing to give them what a man needs and able to fight to keep it true. More babies; more man freedom. Unfortunately for man, women are evolving all over the world and man has no time to ponder. They nag as much as the American bitches.
A woman with power fishes overseas because she needs to feel like a woman again by the crude affections of a foreign alpha with a penchant for America, sex, shackling, expensive gifts and more money. I don't think getting your head chopped off for an orgasm is worth it but... They all deserve each other.
(P.S. Did Julia call "The Boy" a doll? Awesome. He's turning.) 01-Mar-2021
Natalie and Mike's ferocious mother. Natalie turned into WandaVision for one night and it was glorious. Does her country allow her to be this independent and vocal? She was on a mission to get what she deserves. Mama came onboard to judge. Both women were hardheaded. Mama Ferocious smeared Rachel with butter and slapped her son with a tail and an elephant moniker. They were Avengers united in the quest to do what's best for Mike. Unload him/inherit him. Brava! Rachel won the day and our hearts. Has she? Madame Meow and her son. Meow forgot to check the other ten phones he's hiding at his girlfriend's house. He's setting her up and she is letting him. Why? It's dangerous to conceive that her actions are ok because she likes it. Andrew and Amira. Nasty, dude. Maybe what The Boy needs on the farm is a man. 26-Jan-2021
Acapulco Shore (2014-)
The men are supreme alpha dogs. The girls keep tripping on penis and alcohol on their way to womanhood. Welcome to a fucker's paradise. The sexes loathe each other as much as the American version except the Mexican men are allowed to call the women messy, hairy and girlish whores as the women are free to be messy, hairy and girlish whores. 18-Mar-2021
Dying rich old fart with regrets decides to enroll in a new experiment where they transfer your brain onto Ryan Reynolds body. The director doesn't allow the old man to play with himself as soon as he's alone as Reynolds. Bummer. It's a grim and bumpy ride. I thought the ending was sweet but I wish I hadn't seen it coming halfway in. Not worth the bullets or the destruction. 09-Mar-2021
Casados Con Hijos (2004-)
Married With Children adapted for Colombian TV. The cast and writers are frying the American version in nastiness. They break all the rules that we police. Al is ridiculous and mama makes Peggy proud. Bud fucks his uncle's wife before the wedding and Kelly literally fucks the whole town. It's free, it's stupid, it makes me laugh before singing me to sleep. There's nothing like family. 06-Mar-2021
Summer House (2017-)
Stephen found out the hard way that there is no pleasing a woman. Dude, they're made out of cocaine and we are made out of weed. Wear them out. 05-Feb-2021
Good Boys (2019)
They don't know fancy they just emulate it. The trio has swag, is interracially charismatic and have the cojones of steel. They made me laugh, spin, adore and cheer them. Boys surviving through primal instinct. Take it or leave it that's what boys are. 04-Mar-2021
Married At First Sight (2014-)
Virginia and Erik. Virginia invited some of her slumber fucks over and they got along swimmingly with Erik. They had so much of one thing in common. Briana and Erik. Big guy, small dick? Clara and Ryan. Ryan invited his ex and significant other. The ex kept smirking uncomfortably. He was embarrassed for his bottom boy. Significant other got paid to cheer. Haley and Jacob. I can see the hate in her eyes whenever anyone casts him in a good light. She's clenching her teeth, screaming "can't you see it!?" I can see it girl! I wouldn't want to birth him a daughter with that nose either. 03-Mar-2021
Virginia and Erik. Why didn't El Pastor ask Virginia if she would give up drinking for a successful marriage when they whisked her away from that party on the beach? Veronica, even children use slumber parties as an excuse to fuck. Erik knows all the answers to a successful relationship. Why is he here with this child? Clara and Ryan. The couple can no longer contain the frozen smiles on their faces. They're melting. She's about to jump out of her skin and bottom pocket has malfunctions. Eek. Briana & Vincent. He doesn't seem genuine. Hailey and Jacob. She hates him. Jacob intimated that all white people are Karens. We no longer have to wonder. Paige. I was hoping to get closure to this catastrophe but no one had the balls. El Pastor came a knocking to have Paige announce to the court that she was not coerced into being a stranger's sex puppet. Maybe she acquiesced because she was assured by experts that it would be safe. If El Pastor wanted to redeem himself, he would have let Paige talk, have Chris listen but not say anything, annul the marriage and tell him to get the fuck off the show. Next week: and the beat goes on. 24-Feb-2021
When a woman tells her husband it's not clicking she's telling him his dick did not make her vagina go clackety clack. She's being nice. Four husbands attempted zipping their wives. Only one succeeded. His dick clicked with her vagina. The other three wives did shut up. BLM attacked the MAF bus. BLM apologized at dinner but Proud boys showed up late and served him raw sushi and steak knives. Boom!
How long are these quacks going to make Paige suffer? 18-Feb-2021
Erik and Virginia. She's high energy, he's a horny old nerd enjoying a young chick. It will kill him, tire him or oops, with the right drug mixture, reenergize him. Vincent and Brianna. I will rub his head as soon he stops pretending he has the answer to everything. Jacob and Haley. Daddy has singe body. Mama wife needs to feel it somewhere in the dark, share it and turn her back on it as soon as he pounces. Ryan and Clara. Ryan is a super pocket daddy. He is super because he's a diamond in the ruff, hung, confident, manly and willing to seem 10 feet tall. I want to play with that piece of art laying across his head. I love it. If she sluts, he's out. Chris and Paige. The Wolf and Little Red Riding Hood. The Wolf's pack/family portrayed a gang rape mentality when discussing The Wolf's bride. Disgusting. They all wanted to bang her big butt like it wasn't attached to a person.
Whomever has the cat must have Viviana visit. She hates them! 01-Feb-2021
Young Sheldon (2017-)
Did old Sheldon just announce that Call Me Kat was a lousy lay? 27-Feb-2021
Bringing the sweet back to comedy. I'll take it. 24-May-2019
The only way to siphon enjoyment is to abolish any thought that this Sheldon exemplifies Big Bang Sheldon. Mamas and sentimentality rule. 16-Jan-2018
Young Sheldon is only a shadow of the adult we know from Big Bang. Continuity frustrates because the child quips about things that the adult version deflected. The fun is limited because we know the child wont make it to maturity, is not invested in relationships and his family will barely exist in his present. 27-Sep-2017
Avengers, The (2012)
Arise the madness. Superhero magnificence. 16-Feb-2021
Pete's Dragon (2016)
This is the the corny one but not to death. Elliot is a majestic dragon with fur and radioactive green. It still acts like a dog but it's butchy. Slave boy becomes orphan boy after wandering off into the forest post a fatal family crash. He is adopted by Elliott, becomes Tarzan boy, lives with animals, lives like animals and acquires 6 years knowledge of the English language by reading the same baby book over and over. No. The dragon doesn't talk. He whimpers. I frown on animals talking but dragons don't exist so it's okay for them to talk when we need shit explained. Redford was enervating, Howard was luminous and Fegly imagined. Sweet and magical moments stand out. 16-Feb-2021
You can successfully write stupid if the cast is willing to forego all boundaries and accept the stupidity in all of us. It can be unrealistic, silly but fun. There are more misses than hits but when they do, they are uproarious. Kisses to Queen Kong and a supportive staff, cunning to break out. 14-Feb-2021
Summer House (2017-)
Dude, they're still alive! They're back with added color. They haven't grown one bit. That's fabulous. 05-Feb-2021
Every party is a cleanse for every dream that wont come true. 07-May-2020
Truth party games. Wow, they really work.
The girls are friends again until the next bout of horniness trumps it. 01-May-2020
The green giant has sexual dysfunction and old people getting it on, is sick. 23-Apr-2020
Had no idea there was clamor for more. It's back to the future where we get to see grandpappy hook-ups in real time. "Me too" is a charity, feminine wiles are an exaltation, closets are for sex not coming out, women love big things, men are horny and crass mugs that only hold intelligent conversations whilst on the hunt and remain stupid after they fox it. I have no idea what they represent but my generation is enthralled and disturbed. 13-Mar-2020
A band-aid of happy endings. 29-Jul-2019
The gay got replaced by a floaty and a scary virgin. The elders are not aging gracefully and the show has gone from being my chore radio to white noise. When you watch reality TV you get to experience the damage our parents wrought. 23-Jul-2019
- Supreme Ken Doll (Kyle) needs to explore why he prefers living in a blur
- Waiting is a virtue (Amanda) - only if you know what you're waiting for
- Lindsay realized that change only happens when you apply it to yourself. Good for her
- The salt (Danielle) was overtaken by hot peppers (twins)
- The inactive (Stephen) needs to divert his hostility towards his parents. They are the reason he can't move forward
- The blistering giant's (Carl) self awareness allows him to take from life easily 19-Jul-2019
In season two they added salt to mild, endowed the gay with a bitch rap and the desperation from separation (relationships/careers) was dialed up a notch. Stephen needs to accept his het counterpart like he'd like to be. If he's really a friend he would appreciate Carl's flamboyance and his disregard for what people think of him. Hotness attracts men. Hot shit spills over. Unless you only have eyes for him...that's a different problem. 15-Jul-2019
It does stereotype well. Twins are still annoying, blondes are vacant, the gay needs an apron, the ex-fatboy is out for revenge and the women still have no clue what's flashing in a man's face. The man knows. Mind boggling. I may become obsessed by it or immune. 12-Jul-2019
Carter is still sucking them toes and making us laugh. His character explores his self worth and how it relates to his environment. He made the threesome amazingly loud and had me howling at his penguin skit. Tiffany is the chosen one. Being in her company is a win. She distinguishes herself further by disempowering the beings that lifted her. There were tender moments with boyfriends and exes and exes of boyfriends and friends. The cast was great. It teases you with sex then shoots you in the heart. 29-Jan-2021
They dominated, they failed and bonded over it. I'd like to see an exploration of the subservient but this point of view sufficed. 03-May-2019