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TV Posts Tagged as 'Daddy Squish'

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Devil In Idaho (2022-) Woof

A mother aids a teen escaping from a restrictive family with juvenile religious beliefs. Yes, all families are cults. The child with satan's tattoo ingratiates herself to the modern family but overstays her unwelcome. Mother is the most decisively written character. The child becomes an obsession because it is like her. In pain, pretending everything is honkey dory with a dash of hope that the next best thing will save her but is always fucked. Carrie is the series inspiration. It reminds you without embodying any of the traits that make the original great. Madeleine Arthur could not find the dorkiness in the character because she doesn't consider herself one. Elegant Creepmeister is what the character demanded. There was no significant difference between the before and after makeover except maybe a bath. The daughters wrought faithful feelings trying to decipher why mommy prefers to hang out with a freak. Naomi Tan was aware of everything and we feel her the most. I couldn't tell the love interest and gbf apart. I thought her love interest was gay throughout most of it. I'm a dork. The gay bestie was a letdown because he only cared about being friends if they didn't befriend others. That's not a friend, it's a husband. Sam Yaeger's daddy was interactive with audience imagination despite his thin storyline. We imagined that he was the kind of daddy that would fuck everything in his path including that old realtor and the cop. The cop took me back to Lost. Remember, the egyptian looking guy with the eyeliner? Yeah, I wanted to fuck him while studying his face. The cop investigation was weak and amateur but he sure was pretty. Penikett is a howl as a parent whose ignorant beliefs are jeopardizing the family but gettting him community clicks. His diction came very close to "wascally wabbit." The cult and action were silly but the heart was in a tight space. The study contains brilliant pieces that needed to spread out. 19-Jan-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Chemistry, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fun Acting, Funny, Heart Writ, Hot Swatch, Music Rocks, Nostalgic, Psychological, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Timid, Trashy, Warbly, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Thoughtful

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19-Jan-2023


Last Of Us, The (2022-) Arf

Not saving boys or giving them parts in movies is becoming a Hollywood tradition. A snarky and petulant baby girl is rescued so she can realize her dream of becoming a toxic man. Pascal is the footman on the rescue mission and the only one forcing his acting talent to burst. Anna Torv is saddled with being a man whose deep scars hide a harsher man. It's an eerie Walking Dead iteration that seems to add nothing worth noting. 17-Jan-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, By the Numbers, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Drama, Horror

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17-Jan-2023


Winter House (2021-) Arf

S2E3. Luke is banished for having sexual thoughts about a girl that mentally promised him a blowjob. Women are warriors and baby factories, not sexual beings. That's what the LGBTQ community is for. Paige allows her lover to go bonkers because he would dump her for being a disobedient slut. Dumping the asshole would be female empowerment. Oooh, Kyle has love handles. He's squishy. Yum. I bet both sides taste like butterscotch. Kory is looking for a relationship that will adorn him in pearls. I know of a few straight men that can pretend to be his uncle. 13-Jan-2023

Tags: 2020s, Camp, Cowboy, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Lifestyle, NSFW, Reality, Relationships, Sex, Silly, Tacky, Trashy, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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13-Jan-2023


Below Deck (2013-) Howl

I want Captain Daddy to return, saddle up with Captain Sandy and fire those two fanny fluttered wenches. One serves too much, the other too little. I'd also have Captain Dicksome sail across and give the captains a thumbs up, banners on the sails and lots of loud honking as the wingless birds exit. 10-Jan-2023
Fuck pinpoint accuracy, Captain Sandy needs a drink. That's why she's overeating and is probably gonna break a bottle atop that backstabbing ass bitch's head. SHE HEARD YOU ON THE RADIO! 06-Jan-2023
Captain Daddy is helming a boat full of digressing fools. Chief Stew Frasier is waiting for a gangbang to push him into aggression. Chef Loops decided that finagling questionable chemicals into meals for guests is a better option than being addicted. White girls will never get along with black superiors unless they're spraying spritzes of sugar, ie: soda. Chris Lamb is onboard to make us forget him, Ross McHarg was hired to not say "gay," and Tony will suck anybody's dick because in his native country, he would starve, if he didn't. 06-Dec-2022

Tags: 2010s, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Funny, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Real, Silly, Sweet, Tacky, Wit Snit

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10-Jan-2023


Love Island Australia (2018-) Arf

S4E26. Jake Gyllenhall Superman with a dorky accent. Country Quasimodo is punished for allowing girls to use him in a non-sexual manner. Samson who hates Delilah actually thinks he's got his sexuality down pat. Hawaiian Punch hasn't been opened yet, his teeth aren't yellow. Why talk about girls when Callum is the only thing worth eating. 05-Jan-2023
I missed the UK version so much that I resorted to this backup. This is a different animal, full of seriousness and ferocity.

The men are cave dwellers and the women, the suppliers that keep toxic men conquering.

If all a woman wants is bigness, handsomeness, grunting and darkness you are forsaking the feminist dream.

The brutality of what each sex stands for baffles me. 29-Jun-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Hot Swatch, Maddening, Psychological, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Squish Alert, Unfunny, Wit Crack

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05-Jan-2023


Too Hot To Handle (2020-) Bites

Oh fuck. Monumental nudity not allowed. Boo! 18-Dec-2022
S4E3. The hornies are back. The series offered light nudity because they can and should. They served two pretty safe pipe extinguishers, one knockout but no monumentals. We're talking James and male ass here. He's the monumental that hasn't shown. 12-Dec-2022
Yo, call a doctor! The human race is hornier than we thought. It's not just us, its everybody! The children are fucked! 03-Jul-2021
No sex games, stripper parties or porn stars performing anatomy tricks. No Casa De Amor with an hour free of rules to tempt anyone. A lame exercise in controlling the libido does not a better date candidate make and I have no idea what point it's trying to make. (The winner takes home about $12.00 after taxes.) 19-Apr-2020
The norm is hornier than I thought. Love Island Castaways land on Mt. Celibacy and are tortured into going straight. The women are boob jocks and the men prance around blowing bro bubbles. The understanding is that what an independent woman wants, is a servant. It's not daring or tacky, not willing to titillate on a channel that permits it and not willing to locate a winning politic. "Tom Holland future" is an eerie panty shredder, women are still reaching for the biggest/complicated things, unruly racism is itching closer to our faces and Jesus left because he couldn't stand them. 18-Apr-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Egotistical, Fake, Horror, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Juvenile, No Chemistry, Reality, Sap, Shrill Act, Silly, Weird

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18-Dec-2022


White Lotus, The (2021) HowlUpgrade

I didn't know Coolidge had more acting tricks up her sleeve. The lady was hiding a cowgirl and the funniest stunt woman, ever. The jump was everything. Will Sharpe expressed himself beautifully and he showed some thigh. Aubrey Plaza remained steady and to the back. Fahey and James remained fake versions of themselves and didn't express anything besides animal instinct. It was shocking, on point and masterclass. 12-Dec-2022
My favorite Wednesday Addams, of all time, is Aubrey Plaza. She became a bitch when her mother, Morticia, started boiling everything and aunt Lester lost her hair. Theo James is a fuck kill. Coolidge is being treated like a goddess by the gays and I hope she lets them have it. Hale Lu Richardson is Florence Pugh's Eve. Will Sharpe has to explain himself or show more thigh. Fahey is a rain of artificial sunlight. Michael Imperioli and F. Murray Abraham play a perfect father and son team that identify but don't accept that one begat the other. They fear their beautiful youngling will inherit their sad fate. The bigger you lie, the better the marriage but by then, the soul is gone. Female sexual harassment in the workplace, men expressing the difficulty in containing themselves, the sexes exploiting that, intelligent words coming out of fine actors and a director that provides the vision he describes. 30-Nov-2022
Mike White delivers an itchy script full of descriptive characters and awkward situations. The luscious atmosphere is reduced by human mania and overcompensation. Jennifer Coolidge cracked my funny bone, tore my heart and was masterclass as a woman acquiring power by being weak. Murray Bartlett played an outrageous gay asshole with ridiculous tendencies. Jake Lacy was pure alpha as a newlywed lord ruling over his petty wife. Molly Shannon whipped up a venomous mother-in-law from hell. Steven Zahn and John Gries gripped man sensibilities. Connie Britton and Alexandra Daddario convinced me. Natasha Rothwell spilled her heart and Jolene Purdy split my stitches. The teens were beautifully vacant, troubled, witty and intoxicating, just like vacations. 19-Aug-2021

Tags: 2020s, Beautiful, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director Art, Drama, Elegance, Enthusiastic, Fun, Funny, Gay Swatch, Great Acting, Heart Writ, Heartbreaking, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Lesbian, Music Rocks, Mystery, Relationships, Romance, Sentimental, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Sweet, Tough, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight, Writ Tough, Writing Reigns

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12-Dec-2022


Love Never Lies (2021-) WoofDowngrade

MENTIRA! 12-Dec-2022
S2E5. Pretty Jesus was punished for finding a tighter pussy than his partner. Partner was blindsided with pretty short dick distractions. Backsies. Guess who has to give up what? Bitch! That is a twice in a ifetime, unless you're a pervert, but still. 10-Dec-2022
S2E4. The producers segregated the relationships from their would be or were one night stands. The other half got a preview of Casa de Fuck through a taste test. A blindfolded gay was relieved to feel a man instead of a boy. He only tastes like a boy, we think he's a girl. Poor thing. They found a chick that would allow pretty Jesus to come instantaneously inside of. A lesbian had to watch as her man hating partner was fooled into admitting to a football team of straight fucks. They set up the short guy with a woman willing to trade size for half a crucifixion. The bizarro stud with the Clark Kent glasses is getting turned on by his wife's infidelities. 09-Dec-2022
S2E3. The hostess with the mostest is still most. The new climate soars like desperation for attention and a warning that fairy tale relationships are doomed. A gay partner appeared to pretend that he didn't know that gays "prioritize" cheating in their relationships. He was just mad because they brought him a girly boy but his lover, a man. A breath taker with astounding legs is trying to turn a lesbian into an everything bagel. A couple is hooking up with another couple's partner. Double the doom. A cheated upon wailed like an animal. I've never heard that sound before. Pretty Jesus is consistently crucified by the women in his life. His wife had choices and his one night stand couldn't stand him. Short cis men are the most insecure because giants are on every woman's shopping list. The only thing stopping a partner from cheating is a lack of mutual sexual attraction and nothing more. 07-Dec-2022

Tags: Daddy Squish, Foreign, Fun, Funny, Game Show, Gay Swatch, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Lesbian, LGBTQ, Over the Top, Relationships, Sex, Spanish, Wit Crack, Words Spoke, Writ Funny

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12-Dec-2022


Amazing Race, The (2001-) Howl

This year was all about daddy fashion. Daddy wore many accentuating pants that shadowed stuff that lifted our imagination. The winner of the race also won the best leg contest. No disrespect, but I don't want to fuck them, my comic book character does and only the legs. I knew that one couple wasn't going to make it when one partner kept smiling like a loser. 08-Dec-2022
Daddy Phil rocked some stylish pants that made his Keoghan pop out. Nice daddy. The granite bros have me wishing for a thong challenge. I want to see the tall dude but not his wife Karen skimp too but I feel guilty. They look like they tie people up. Father and Daughter. She eyerolls stealthily whenever her father extols his masculinity and makes her look stoopid. The L Sisters were my favorite. They barfed eating greek Souvlaki. Yes, I know! It's that awful white sauce. It tastes like baby vomit. That's why I order it without it. It's really better that way. 18-Feb-2022

Tags: 2000s, 2010s, Action, Best in Reality, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Drama, Fantasy, Funny, Gay Swatch, History, Hot Swatch, NSFW, Pretty, Sentimental, Silly, Special, Squish Alert, Suspense, Twisty, Unity, Wit Snit

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08-Dec-2022


Love Is Blind (2020) Howl

No one recognized that Bartiste is the thigh king. I know daddy looked like Pebbles Flintstone but to me he was a Bam Bam Rubble. I wanted to pull it and give him a back bath. Cole showed off his thighs too. As if. The females called Cole a good guy then tore him apart in the description." "You fat shaming hoochie fucking dirty ass broke lying motherfucker evil spawn of satan with dreamy eyes." The women were so supportive of each other that they made Cole cry. Putting Vicks on the tips of his fingertips and rubbing his eyes worked. Colleen was petrified to look Cole's way. She did it in the intro and ticked uncontrollably away. She saw those eyes. Yikes. I think she might have wet herself again. If she did that means that she suffered the whole hour without a diaper change due to the lack of commercials. Guess who's available to fuck somebody's wife? Dude, she lives alone! 09-Nov-2022
The show wastes the contestants and their guests' time by planning a fake wedding in the hopes of both parties saying yes? How humiliating. Nick's idea, wasn't it. 08-Nov-2022
S3E8. Would the thigh king agree to abort a future serial killer? No one should have the audacity to bear humans that can't exist without immense help. A lot of these kids can't communicate how they feel. We interpret how they feel. How do we know they're not saying, "I hate you, I hate you". Where's daddy? Is he working his thighs again while I suffer in pain? Yo, barbecue pork is giving the king a run for his money. What a beautiful fuck roast. Bartiste can shed some hair on Andrew's cloud puffs. Brennan looks like that but can't make any money? Ooh. Colleen was not at the club 'til 2:30 in the morning, she was washing her panties. They take forever to dry. They got wet from all the attention Cole was giving her. Both Matt and Cole were more argumentative with their fiancees than they were with each other. Their confrontation was bullshit. Matt really said, "please, I'm begging you, don't fuck my wife" and Cole said, "I won't" but thinking, "I'm gonna fuck your wife". Raven is going to regret taking an Ambien. She's gonna be woozy afterwards. Raven should have paired herself with the other thigh master if she wanted to live comfortably. We know he's a super daddy because he continuously spit it in everyone's face. Fuck other people on the side and go shopping. 06-Nov-2022
S3E7. You must become blind if you want to find love. Bartiste has cheating pork thighs, Cole has fuck all the girls silly eyes, Matt has kick your ass for being a slut ticks, Brennan's eyes turn black when nobody is looking and SK is an Ambien pill (30 minutes in your system before it knocks you out). It's about immature women that read fairy tales as children and believe them. For men, it's a "How To Pick Up Vulnerable Chicks" guide. Lie, lie, lie. 06-Nov-2022

Tags: Corn, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preachy, Questionable, Reality, Relationships, Religion, Sex, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Travel, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Thoughtful

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09-Nov-2022


Inside Man (2022) Whimper

How a good person can be lead to kill. Stanley Tucci is elegant and perceptive as a death row inmate who helps investigate and solve crime. Atkins Estimond supplies "Watson" cuddliness. David Tennant spirals like a rabid dog. The wife is a frantic lunatic and the tutor is the "Karen" that's asking for it. It flourished in the beginning when we were blinded by its freshness but once we analyzed the idiocy of it all, it didn't make much sense. The deductions are grabbed from thin air, some of the reactions are not reasonable and by the end I was irked. Why didn't they just burn the stupid thing? Why did the pervert have to be mentally challenged? All of my perverts had normal capabilities and didn't freak people out. Why are perverts granted mercy but "Karens" are unforgivable? Who gives their perverted porn to a vicar? Your mama don't want it in the house, smash it to smithereens. Yes, anyone can become a killer but many others don't. They are called good dead people. 05-Nov-2022

Tags: 2020s, Chemistry, Cliche, Crapfun, Creepy, Crime Drama, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Indecipherable, LGBTQ, Overcooked, Preposterous, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Vague, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

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05-Nov-2022


Watcher, The (2022) Arf

Moving to a new neighborhood is like finding extended family. Neighbors expect things of you. You fake your way out, you eventually fall into their trap and they change you. Jennifer Coolidge is in it. She was mighty confident pulling out question marks. She's all you'd expect and more. Margo Martindale is sublime as a sparring neighbor that's always lawfully right. The asshole who I think claimed all men want to sleep with their daughters was intriguing. Mia Farrow was wasted as a tree communicator/hugger/companion. A neighbor that excludes humans from the safety of the environment is a nag. Every time Papa Cannavale raged, my loins pleasantly shifted but when he didn't stop, I got ED. The Wakandan investigator seemed too fabulous to be in this realm. Real-life haunted house stories are bullshit. A bunch of brilliant people coming up with an idea of creating history by actually destroying people's lives and documenting it. All I wanted was to see Martindale and Coolidge go at it. Coolidge as a porn star neighbor with loud parties and sex orgies (ooh ooh, she can invite Stifler), colorful guests and Martindale doing what she does best with lesbian tendencies. Ryan puts our head in a tumbler and expects us to figure it out. On what basis? 14-Oct-2022

Tags: 2020s, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fatigue, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Horror, Indecipherable, Over the Top, Overcooked, Political, Star Watt, Tedium, Timid, Warbly, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

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14-Oct-2022


Werewolf By Night (2022) Howl

A monster mash that returns to its cinema roots to re-establish itself in the present. Story over matter, acting instead of over-compensation and violence with a due purpose. Harriet Sansom Harris has a voice you shyly obey, Laura Donnelly's spirit has cool tendencies and Buffy skills, I prefer Mr. Bernal in shorts and no makeup but I'll take him however he is served. Please, remember the shorts, though. 12-Oct-2022

Tags: 2020s, Action, Classic, Daddy Squish, Director Art, Director's Touch, Drama, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Horror, Suspense, Tough, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight

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12-Oct-2022


DAHMER: MONSTER (2022) Woof

Cinematic art ceases during wind down when Ryan's team inserts modern politics into the victims' families' mouths. Little sympathy is garnered due to the hypocrisy that they expect the police to protect them but be hands off if they themselves commit a crime. You can't have it both ways. The sandwich inspired its most chilling scene. The addition of another gay monster killer paralleling the present one is terrifyingly well done. Evan Peters never lets go of his disguise, Richard Jenkins slaughtered, unrecognizable Molly Ringwald had moments, the actor who played Jesse Jackson was eerie good and Niecy Nash's character stayed too long but she remained great. In the end, everyone exploited a man who felt alive in killing because he was invisible through life. It's a disservice to the victims if we don't learn to protect ourselves from it instead of denying it. Dahmer had the last laugh. He is ever more present and his surroundings are all but invisible. 27-Sep-2022
S1E4. Evan Peters takes us inside a gay serial killer's monster bubble and he gives the impression that his art will be popping iteration balloons for years to come. Niecy Nash is that bossy bitch neighbor that's always in people's business that no one wants to hear but gets politically redeemed by being the right amount of bossy. Nash holds the note a second too long but her character sings. Richard Jenkins used craft in telling the story of a parent that feels pain for raising a monster. Michael Learned reminded me of mama Walton but later, vanquished it. She embodies the bitter old woman that supports you to be whomever you want as long as its made up at church. Did she inspire his racist thoughts? The show obsesses over bloody squishy things instead of sexy, kinky things. I hope it switches. Man's true nature is exposed during sex. At that time, the community agreed that he was scary as fuck because we would have fucked him...and died. Only a victim can describe a monster and only a monster can describe his family. The series proclaims that mothers should not have children if they are mentally suffering, a weird child best ignored is not a happy child, a grown father dissecting animals with his gay kid encourages human devastation, daddy keeps encouraging human devastation because he can't beat his wife and cops get punished for being sensitive to gays. Evan's thought process is to lay blame on the parents and make himself accountable for the joy that chaos brought him and because only fucked up parents can create such a fucked up kid. 23-Sep-2022

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Chemistry, Crapfun, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Enthusiastic, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay, Good Acting, Great Acting, Heart Writ, Horror, Hot Swatch, Mini, Politics, Preachy, Psychological, Sentimental, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Suspense, Tough, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Thoughtful

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27-Sep-2022


Sandman, The (2022-) Whimper

9-10. The showdown was anti-climactic because the Sandman's only defense is throwing sand in people's faces. 18-Aug-2022
S1E8. Raising Dion marks a return with a silly superhero suit, man nips and an unengaging sister. Lucienne hits dictation hard because she does not believe a word she says. Dream is making me laugh with how serious he is but the show is not. Corinthian grows wearisome and the raven and pumpkin feel out of place. Gault flickered economically. Good for her! 17-Aug-2022
Episodes 1-4 were a gliding introduction on skates but 5-7 cracked the ice. There is nothing in Patton Oswalt's voice that I would confuse for a mythological bird. The actors are best prior to the sixth episode with 5 being unbearable, 6 boring and 7 incapable of easing the many sexes and cultures gracefully. When the beautifully pale Morpheus with the tiniest lips and waist returns from episode hiatus, the interest is renewed. All else is Dr. Who/DC Christmas Special. 16-Aug-2022

Tags: 2020s, Camp, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Fantasy, Fatigue, Gay, LGBTQ, Magic, Overcooked, Pitchy, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly, Static, Stupid Funny, Tedium, Timid, Tired, Warbly, Writ w/Possibilities

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18-Aug-2022




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