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TV Posts Tagged as 'Wit Crack'

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Married At First Sight (2014-) Howl

Virginia & Eric. Daddy tried to impress his daughter with his Snoopy skills. He was the Red Baron. She complained that he didn't spend enough time with her family. Daddy doesn't want to hang around people his age. It's nerve wracking. Briana & Vincent. Lucy plotted for Ricky to see her dance, he trained to ignore her. She fully acclaimed herself, he was full of boredom. She teased maternity and snapped his attention back but when she extended the expiration date he held back. "A dancer, my ass!" Clara & Ryan. He's failed every mental health wellness test I can think of. Of course he's willing to have relationships with her family. He doesn't have to fuck them either. He makes his vibrant wife "hand job" him every night because she is not worthy of full penetration. I want him and Chris to make a Fans Only video. I want to see Chris fuck the shit out of Ryan's balloon clown ass. Haley & Jacob. My favorite bird (Rio) and princess (Lilly of The Valley) competed for alphadom. Jacob needs to bend over immediately because her strap is hard and he lost. Did daddy call himself an eagle and her a dragon? Like the one in Shrek? 15-Apr-2021
Chris explained to Pastor Cal that the reason he was explosive on the show is because they set him up with a grenade. I wished El Pastor would have utilized some of the cheap scenery and bashed him with it. The experts were so professional that it felt like they were reading my mind. Virginia and Erik. One of the disadvantages of being a daddy is you get to watch your little girl go on dates and come home plastered. Haley and Jacob. All I heard were inner screams during Haley's therapy session. "If he touches me again...I'll scream...I swear it!" Oooh maybe he's CIA. Clara and Ryan. Clara, don't beg for sex. Men who make their partners wait for sex usually suck at it. She needs to renew her contract and corral herself the tallest man of her dreams. Briana and Vincent. Ricky Ricardo schemed to get Lucy to agree to let him sleep late with his newly conceptualized financial budget. Lucy swallowed the budget like a seal eating fish. When Briana told Vincent that she was afraid to have children, all was still except for the profanities swirling in his head. Well-played ladies! 08-Apr-2021
The unmentionable couple. His voice makes me put a lock on my ass even though it splits her vagina. Go figure. Alligator dick is making her look like a stupid horny cheerleader. Ryan and Clara. Bottom boy doesn't know how to satisfy a woman. A horny hillbilly doesn't help. Experts need to set up "gay alerts" with butchy lesbians like the Australian version. (It wakes up identity at supreme velocity.) Jacob and Haley. Herman Munster and any strange white woman down the street. Haley needs to stop signing NDAs. Besides a two incher, a fast cummer or an accidental choker, I don't understand the dilemma. Did he confuse the meaning of cunnilingus? Did he make her lick his hairy ass? Did he not wipe? We wanna know. Erik and Virginia. There is no life for her without her drunk fuck buddies. They're lords of her ring. Old daddy showed "wife duly fuck" appreciation by taking her flying. Vincent and Briana. It feels like he's faking it. His insecurities can't solidify love. 24-Mar-2021
The show let the dogs out so Doctora Viviana could pet them. See, she likes animals, just not cats. There was a harrowing moment when Haley's adorable dog was seen judging Viviana but she caught him and gave him stink-eye. The dog magically disappeared. Hailey and Jacob. Dude, she's been acting like this ever since you fucked her. There are two types of screams in the world and her aura ain't spelling delighted. 18-Mar-2021

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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15-Apr-2021


Married With Children (1987-1997) Woof

I never realized how much female input there was in scouring the marriage of an alpha fucker and our mothers. 15-Apr-2021

Tags: 1980s, 1990s, Camp, Chemistry, Classic, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Funny, Gay, Gay Swatch, Great Acting, Hilarious, Magic, Magnetism, Political, Reality, Relationships, Representing, Sentimental, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Sweet, Tacky, Tough, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny

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15-Apr-2021


90 Day Fiancee: Tell All (2021) 

The legend of the Leprechaun

Pt.1. Yara & Jovi. Jovi likes strippers because they make him cum. Mike & Natalie. Natalie might qualify for "best supporting actress in a documentary" at next year's Academy Awards. Mike is a beastly leprechaun. He promises her his pot of gold then takes it back. The beast got shot projectiles for finding a unique way to explain cheating on Natalie. The prize for the humiliation is five years of extra fucks for him and a smelly closet, a freezing home, a pig, carrots and some company for her. I hope someone asks Natalie if she's a hardcore fan of Alison Argram who played Nellie Oleson on Little House... Brandon & Julia. Julia gave all the males woodies and squirms whilst describing her career, esp. Jovi and Brandon's dad. The Boy's mother almost choked from twitching closed her emotions. Rebecca & Zied. Tiffany's friend flirted with Zied and fucked Tiffany's husband. His guilt oozed right off the screen even though nobody accused him of anything. Zied didn't fuck Rebecca when she got naked in the hot tub because the lighting was off. Andrew & Amira. She couldn't breathe so she put a sexy bustier on to help the oxygen circulate. Andrew got his hair ironed for nothing. 13-Apr-2021

Tags: 2020s, Abuse, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Egotistical, Emasculating, Fatigue, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Hilarious, Horror, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Insulting, Juvenile, Maddening, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Predictable, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Supremacism, Tough, Twisty, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Basic

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13-Apr-2021


Acapulco Shore (2014-) Woof

The men are supreme alpha dogs. The girls keep tripping on penis and alcohol on their way to womanhood. Welcome to a fucker's paradise. The sexes loathe each other as much as the American version except the Mexican men are allowed to call the women messy, hairy and girlish whores as the women are free to be messy, hairy and girlish whores. 18-Mar-2021

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Crapfun, Creepy, Crime Drama, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Foreign, Funny, Hot Swatch, Hyper, Relationships, Sexy, Shrill Act, Silly, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Tough

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18-Mar-2021


Casados Con Hijos (2004-) Woof

Married With Children adapted for Colombian TV. The cast and writers are frying the American version in nastiness. They break all the rules that we police. Al is ridiculous and mama makes Peggy proud. Bud fucks his uncle's wife before the wedding and Kelly literally fucks the whole town. It's free, it's stupid, it makes me laugh before singing me to sleep. There's nothing like family. 06-Mar-2021

Tags: 2000s, 2010s, 2020s, Accidental Watch, Adorable, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Drama, Foreign, Fun Acting, Funny, Great Acting, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Shrill Act, Silly, Special, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tough

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06-Mar-2021


Married At First Sight (2014-) Howl

Virginia and Erik. Virginia invited some of her slumber fucks over and they got along swimmingly with Erik. They had so much of one thing in common. Briana and Erik. Big guy, small dick? Clara and Ryan. Ryan invited his ex and significant other. The ex kept smirking uncomfortably. He was embarrassed for his bottom boy. Significant other got paid to cheer. Haley and Jacob. I can see the hate in her eyes whenever anyone casts him in a good light. She's clenching her teeth, screaming "can't you see it!?" I can see it girl! I wouldn't want to birth him a daughter with that nose either. 03-Mar-2021
Virginia and Erik. Why didn't El Pastor ask Virginia if she would give up drinking for a successful marriage when they whisked her away from that party on the beach? Veronica, even children use slumber parties as an excuse to fuck. Erik knows all the answers to a successful relationship. Why is he here with this child? Clara and Ryan. The couple can no longer contain the frozen smiles on their faces. They're melting. She's about to jump out of her skin and bottom pocket has malfunctions. Eek. Briana & Vincent. He doesn't seem genuine. Hailey and Jacob. She hates him. Jacob intimated that all white people are Karens. We no longer have to wonder. Paige. I was hoping to get closure to this catastrophe but no one had the balls. El Pastor came a knocking to have Paige announce to the court that she was not coerced into being a stranger's sex puppet. Maybe she acquiesced because she was assured by experts that it would be safe. If El Pastor wanted to redeem himself, he would have let Paige talk, have Chris listen but not say anything, annul the marriage and tell him to get the fuck off the show. Next week: and the beat goes on. 24-Feb-2021
When a woman tells her husband it's not clicking she's telling him his dick did not make her vagina go clackety clack. She's being nice. Four husbands attempted zipping their wives. Only one succeeded. His dick clicked with her vagina. The other three wives did shut up. BLM attacked the MAF bus. BLM apologized at dinner but Proud boys showed up late and served him raw sushi and steak knives. Boom!

How long are these quacks going to make Paige suffer? 18-Feb-2021
Erik and Virginia. She's high energy, he's a horny old nerd enjoying a young chick. It will kill him, tire him or oops, with the right drug mixture, reenergize him. Vincent and Brianna. I will rub his head as soon he stops pretending he has the answer to everything. Jacob and Haley. Daddy has singe body. Mama wife needs to feel it somewhere in the dark, share it and turn her back on it as soon as he pounces. Ryan and Clara. Ryan is a super pocket daddy. He is super because he's a diamond in the ruff, hung, confident, manly and willing to seem 10 feet tall. I want to play with that piece of art laying across his head. I love it. If she sluts, he's out. Chris and Paige. The Wolf and Little Red Riding Hood. The Wolf's pack/family portrayed a gang rape mentality when discussing The Wolf's bride. Disgusting. They all wanted to bang her big butt like it wasn't attached to a person.

Whomever has the cat must have Viviana visit. She hates them! 01-Feb-2021

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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03-Mar-2021


Kenan (2021-) Arf

Daddy Hamburger w/Cheese, Bacon and no Mayo looks unhappy around kids. 20-Feb-2021
If anyone deserves a series is Kenan. I'm not sure if this is the right fit or it needs time to evolve. I cheer for Kenan and his cute daughters but I sometimes regret what comes out of their mouths. Kenan is courageous, he found a quick witted way to criticize Beyonce's weight and not be offensive. The daughters' are privy to grown-up naughty stuff which is off-putting. Is that a new generation thing? Yuck. There is a war between nastiness and wholesomeness. I hope nasty wins. 20-Feb-2021

Tags: 2020s, Cliche, Daddy Squish, Drama, Heart Writ, Juvenile, Shrill Act, Timid, Weird, Wit Crack

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20-Feb-2021


Miranda (2009-20015) Woof

You can successfully write stupid if the cast is willing to forego all boundaries and accept the stupidity in all of us. It can be unrealistic, silly but fun. There are more misses than hits but when they do, they are uproarious. Kisses to Queen Kong and a supportive staff, cunning to break out. 14-Feb-2021

Tags: 2000s, 2010s, Accidental Watch, Amiable, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Crapfun, Cute, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Hot Swatch, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Relationships, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

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14-Feb-2021


Great, The (2020-) Howl

This is the gangster version of Bridgerton. Emperor Peter, not The Great (that was his father) marries an empty pocket princess (Catherine,) devirginizes her without proper fantasy protocol and improper rapey penetration and provokes a sexual political war. The emperor was a child playing with a power befitting its time and privy to men and offensive to everyone. Catherine wanted all of that. Nicholas Hoult's cunt is a fascinating watch. You don't want to fuck him but you kinda do until he does something disgusting again and then it's off which makes him curl into a ball and makes you want to hug him. Good job, dude. Elle Fanning owned her virginity as much as she flaunted it. Slutdom was the key to achieving a turn in power. The comedy is harsh, the actors are yum and the politics are like ours. 13-Feb-2021

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Adorable, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director Art, Drama, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Mystery, Political, Psychological, Relationships, Romance, Sentimental, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet, Tough, Twisty, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight, Writ Tough

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13-Feb-2021


Wendy Williams: What A Mess! (2020) Woof

A throaty and battle-weary queen sitting on her throne describing her scars of conflict. She strips another layer of skin and it's boldy humiliating. Oh shit. The hate you give rolls back. It was devastating watching a queen fall apart, reinvent herself and seek revenge in the course of an hour. She outcomplexed myself. It was riveting. If it was fake... even more riveting. 31-Jan-2021

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Celebrity, Doc, Drama, Funny, Gay Swatch, Magnetism, Psychological, Reality, Relationships, Sentimental, Star Watt, Touching, Tough, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

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31-Jan-2021


Wendy Williams: The Movie (2021) Whimper

Ciera Payton was too hollowed and untrained to lend craft to Wendy's huge persona. The accent. She got her Snookies confused with her Lavernes. The tits were great. Why didn't Ms. Payton lip synch to Wendy's real voice? Why didn't Ms. Williams just do it? Why not go balls out crazy and cast a man? That's gold. We tune in because it's grade A gossip but we know it's "fuck you" art. 31-Jan-2021

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Bad Acting, Camp, Celebrity, Crapfun, Cultural, Drama, Funny, Hot Swatch, Preachy, Predictable, Reality, Relationships, Sap, Shrill Act, Silly, Weird, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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31-Jan-2021


United We Fall (2020-) Whimper

Bland parental failure without boundaries. Do whatever doesn't disappoint most of the members and move on. It isn't that funny. There are no consequences or punishments. They fail and move on. 20-Jan-2021

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Comedy, Emasculating, Fatigue, Hyper, No Chemistry, Shrill Act, Star Watt, Static, Tacky, Weird, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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20-Jan-2021


Bridgerton (2020-) Woof

S1E8. A woman wraps up the marriage contract when she can birth a good shank to serve the round table. Men like ideals in women's heads so that our explanations make sense to them. It was brotime, sweetie! They took the cultures out of the equation. We judge them individually. Every actor willed good force. It was fun, it was camp, it was time and we're in it. The ending was delicious and I'm trading the duke in for the boxer. The duke has an "I'm so pretty" snarl. The other looks like my camper. Good job. 28-Dec-2020
S1E7. Mid-thru is an explanation of how black culture became elite. I bought it. The series needs more scandal and debauchery though. I'm replacing yes, daddy with yes, duke. 27-Dec-2020
S1E2. Not necessarily the show I want to binge on after mother telling me my black is white but it's Shonda so I'll give it a go. The shock of seeing black empowered gentleman and ladies of the pre-Victorian era makes my brain explode with fact check assumptions. I don't because I want to accept it on its own merit. Most of the cast whistles, foams and pours whilst the rest couldn't get out of their modern heads. The business at hand is to score the most pristine and delicate virgin hopefully with fine manners (a "yes girl") to fulfill a man's dream of future family and success. A woman's power is to profit from the business, band and thwart any mismatch that might bring a daughter harm and make sons proud. Shonda adds her sight of man appreciation, Shondaspeare fast talk and on your knees intrigue. I remember Nicola Coughlan because I wanted to eat her like she ate that cake. She's delicious. The picture for myself didn't get any clearer because I'm watching black people pretending to live whites lives. It makes the future modern brain wonder what the hate was all about. 26-Dec-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Chemistry, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Discomfort, Drama, Elegance, Fun, Fun Acting, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Hot Swatch, Music Rocks, Mystery, Overcooked, Psychological, Relationships, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

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28-Dec-2020


Dr. Seuss' The Grinch: Musical 2020)  Arf

The one time of the year where we show amnesty to a child predator banished to the caves because of a holiday. He turns green from a life of despair and lack of sexual perversity. Poor Max. Matthew Morrison is hated for his perfect curls, right amount of body hair, a nice gut and Leah Michelle professionalism and he knows it. Perfect casting for the The Grinch. The musical doesn't suck because of him, it is saved by him. A professional never sweats, never disconnects and never stops giving it their all. The mask lets him down but daddy was fully encapsulated. We hate daddy for calculating our pleasure but we'd eat it ASAP if we were caught in a forest or in a bathroom by accident. Wink. Wink. The songs are very outdated. Kids can't eat all the sweets that fill them. They don't know what sweets are and their parents can't remember why they banned them. It is a Whoville delicacy. The white bear meat looked really tasty too. Anyway, the pederast wants to destroy Whoville Christmas to honor the anniversary of when he got caught molesting a child that wasn't related. Cindy Lou saves the day, a green man woody makes a comeback, they all exchange presents they can't return and a molester makes it back home. 10-Dec-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Camp, Celebrity, Chemistry, Cliche, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Juvenile, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Musical, Overcooked, Showy, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Tacky, Tough, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ w/Possibilities

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10-Dec-2020


90 Day Fiance: The Other Way (2019-)  Woof

After sucking all of Jenny's earnings, Sumit's license plate will read "Lying Fucking Indian 2020." The sinful American daughters are no match for the guru of lies. At least they don't have to listen to mother pine for curry penis while he celebrates. The Gallos are getting married. Armando's thoughts shot right through the screen. "The money is mine, mine, mine. All of it. Fuck all thee cheeldren." The baby and Ariela took hot baby to a religious festival. Ariela worried for her child. The baby almost got wet! Her baby is the most sensitive being on the planet. Why are religious people so barbaric? She overreacted, apologized, declared her love for Ethiopion bendy straws and Sumit was not the only foreigner memorizing corny wench snagging romcoms. The mushrooms (Deavon & Jihoon) collapsed under their own gasses. Her dizzy aroma did not mesh with his stationary high. Pretty muslim boy is a terrorist bomb threat with no inheritance package. Brittany said, "fuck that, I'm going back to America. Be safe. Kisses." Smart girl. 30-Nov-2020
Sumit & Jenny. Sumit has earned the best supporting acting Oscar for 2021. He pleaded with the brownstones (parents) like he actually wanted to be married to a 500 year old fossil because he can't do any better or find a stabilized job. If Jenny does not wake up to the scam she will need mental health intervention. Tim left Melyza because dressing and holding a tiny doll in another country is very expensive. To elicit the tight doll like qualities of a foreigner he's going to have to stalk High School cheerleaders once he lands in America. The pain. Brittany and Yazan. Better hotter hairier brother held a conference with Brittany where he spilled Yazan's humiliations and castigations and demonstrated fuckable muslim sensitivity. Brittany is the smart American sister who decides with her brain and not with her partner's dick. Ariela and Baby. Ariela is full pod. There is no hope left for her and her mother knew it. The witches have clouded her mental health so she can withstand the torture of her child. They all lead miserable lives but not going to hell is a priority in a world with no God. It excuses all the evil they do. Stupid traditions belong in the fire. I smell a GLAAD Award for next week's episode. The Gallos get married with absolutely no rights to bind it! 22-Nov-2020
Geez. I almost forgot the gay darlings. First off, fuck them for using a clueless child (daughter) as a tool to make an audience sympathize with their political agenda. Armando did a great job passing the hate. The child was programmed to hate anything that would disagree with whatever daddy and granny croak say. The world pushes back daddies and the girl has no strength. When she acquires an opinion, it will bite them in the ass. Secondly, even if you get married, society doesn't accept, authorities wont honor it and the other laws will cancel it. Nope, wedding contract void. Next! Why bother. Did American croak do any homework? I understand Armando will fuck a cactus to smell a better life but it doesn't last long enough to matter. Eventually he'll have to become the man his wife was always telling him to become and what the daughter needs. Armando will walk away from the farce none the better and carry-on but his daughter might suffer. 16-Nov-2020
The patience testing episode. Ariela and Biniyam. American parents need to get a backbone. If foreign country parents can enslave and threaten to kill their children for their life choices the American parent can dish a whipping and withhold financial support to a dead end relationship. In Biniyam's world man exists to be satisfied (whoring, lying, and free money from easy options.) If Ariela expects respect she texted the wrong area code. I felt Ariela's parents' rage at the witch sisters, accusing their daughter of being tacky and rude whilst being tacky and rude themselves. If women don't have a say in their country, shut the fuck up. Ariela seems like she is breaking from the atmosphere. Good mental heath is a priority. Jenny and The Best Liar In India. Dude is gunning for an award for most convincing reality star. He doesn't want to marry Jenny but he likes her financial support. Bullocks. Jenny needs some help here. Her daughter-in-law gave great red face during the video chat. Send her to India to meet his parents. She'll fuck them up. They are trying to be patient and supportive. I get that. We have to stop being so wimpy though. Tell her. It won't go in right away but given the right moment it will click in when she needs it most. Sorry, Jenny. Tim and Melyza. Tim's mother had the best reaction to female cheating. Women do it to make sure they pick the right one or because they got dumped. 16-Nov-2020
Ariela and Biniyam. Big Baby suffers from Sumit lying syndrome and man whoredom. When a man exclaims he needs to be trusted, don't. His nasty family and stupid smirks do not endear him to humans. Mama Korea brought her kind persona and she was fun. Brittany and Yazan. She's fiddling with fate. I know the main reason why women have to cover-up in muslim countries. The men who dedicate a lifetime to prayer can't contain themselves around flesh. Horndogs. Don't ask them to change a diaper. Melyza played cool cat as mama "Karen" (Tim's mother) met her bet and raised it. Mama will call the police, even in another country if she thinks the slut is getting out of hand. The faux courtesy is just an American charm. 02-Nov-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Comedy, Cultural, Dating, Drama, Gay Swatch, Incomprehensible, Maddening, Over the Top, Political, Psychological, Relationships, Shrill Act, Thriller, Travel, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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30-Nov-2020




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