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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Oncer'
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Kong vs. Kardashians. 10-Jul-2021
It's based on a historical serial killer but it's not. Boy's disinterest in crime history is tested when he stumbles upon evidence that may incriminate a loved one. A teen investigation ensues. Obvious clues don't allow the mystery to spring forward. The family does not generate enough emotion to evoke compassion. There is no new imagination. Are we supposed to act like we don't know who the killer is? It's directed that way. Charlie Plummer pulled away at the proximity of Dylan McDermott. That would have been useful for some guttural acting but no one thought of it. Dylan mocks his character and has no idea how to preach about God. We're cheering for a family that sucks and a film that associates cross dressing with psychos. 19-Jun-2021
Caged mutants. It stifles their capabilities and our enjoyment. I want to see them conquer the world that is familiar to us. It takes cues from the Freddy Krueger series, ho humming along and invading the lab rats' nightmares. Big Bad is stale and the action needed some throwback. Misplaced hair is my pet peeve. There's loads of it. The lesbians elicited some heart, Sunspot singed some hard-ons and the rest needed something to believe. So did we. 03-Feb-2021
Robbie is missing the lilt and the energy that would whip Harley Quinn into a showpiece. The women in charge plaster the screen with cartoon abandon, avoid psychoanalyzing themselves and express no vulnerability that would compel a unique perspective. The film lacks a heart. It's like a man directed it. 13-Jun-2020
Aliens have invaded and, it's up to 4 pups, to save the world. The children are cliches and stereotypes discharging sexual innuendos, inappropriate confusion and fake bravado. The script particularly hates most of the black characters as they exist to be the brunt of a joke and are the fastest to grate. The aliens don't look or act like they can access tech because their design is jurassic. No fun, just crap. 13-Apr-2020
I don't do well with first-person because its film rolling on inanimate objects (people included) that are restricted. A fantastic one connects what we see with what we imagine. A disappointing one makes a straight beeline across a rudimentary device. The creep in question is just an exasperating real estate agent with constant jabber and little realization. The one behind the camera could have offset the other's nonsense with the snappy quips his screams intimated. The axe received the most character development. The "s" word comes to mind but I refuse to use it. 01-Apr-2020
It makes sense in the confines of the story but it's pretty preposterous without a big world picture. It's vile, claustrophobic and exhausting. 30-Mar-2020
Whodunnits don't need explanation. A fresh appeal for a chess match. Everything with Plummer spun magnificently but Craig jacked Spacey's southern flourish with little success. The support were ready but remained pawns in a game. They didn't flesh out. The unraveling was dry and predictable but the mystery qualified. 08-Mar-2020
Trying to recreate the horror of The Exorcist on a scaled budget and via a disorderly presentation. The soul music was vibing but out of place. The shocks consisted of kids swearing, getting buckled and mama make outs. Juliet Mills succeeded wiping out sweet "Nanny and the Professor" memories and replacing them with disturbing ones. It had some effective scares that would have triggered had they been taken seriously. 29-Jan-2020
Hot stuff (James Darrin) obsesses over dead girl. Like the drugged out haze it was written and directed in, the film lingers on aspects that make it boring. It was bold to include an interracial couple and lesbians romping freely but the sex scenes consisted of a man's back against a woman's catlike nails on repetition. Giving Barbara McNair the insufferable title song hurt her vocal chords and our ears. By the end, you'll feel as misplaced as James Darrin. 20-Dec-2019
Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale (2010) 
It delineates the first Santa, full of godlike vengeance and destruction. The film parodies like a summer blockbuster with striking imagery and a cheerleading score. It chugs along, never delivering the titular monster and rabidly tugging at our hearts. 05-Nov-2019
It thought Three Stooges hilarity could save it. Helen Slater, her costume and her hair legitimizes it and Bochner doesn't hurt but everything else is bargain basement. I quit it because I didn't feel like falling asleep for a third time. Nobody cared. 12-Oct-2019
The horror is rendered by characterization and the abomination is in how viciously they get treated. It may be novel for a disaster movie but it damages our senses. 04-Oct-2019
A concoction of leftover ingredients that can't fill a tummy. 01-Oct-2019
Rekindling a bromance. There were so many elements that could have thrust the story forward but the director was so intent on a surprise ending that his magic tricks don't total rationality. It's underhanded. The film relies heavily on Toby Wallace, whose star endowment keeps it flowing and wrings the only emotion at end. 23-Sep-2019
