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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Silly'
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Rich woman with psychological problems marries a dried up coochie player in the hopes of finding normalcy and family. Daddy coochie gaslights because he thinks she is incapable of the truth and doesn't want to cause her more anxiety. Her parents drowned because she couldn't save them. Her latest coochie grabber's ex-wife may be haunting her new home. Daddy leaves her home alone a lot. I saw a crappy colorized version that hinted how nice it would have been in color if you separated it by seconds. Marriage is entrapment and not a contract. The only way to prove to yourself that you are not psychologically impaired is to marry. Your partner will legally let you know what's wrong with you. 23-Jan-2023
I felt like it was written by someone that constantly cancels therapy sessions. Married lady who is attempting to bear child with hubby goes to a lesbian wedding, holds their kid and drops it. They react as you would expect and not. Everything that leads to the wedding is patronizing. Married lady who can't have no children and dropped a kid becomes an unworthy ally, mother and wife. All the characters are cuckoo, babbling about the latest politic that social media hypnotized them with. They're all talking with little connection. Jermaine Fowler had the chops but they didn't let him charbroil them until the end. Utkarsh Ambudkar played a fuck you rendition of an asshole. It was humiliating and brilliant. The ladies stood back as if they were auditioning for high rated TV. What's the point of going on a trip that doesn't matter. 22-Jan-2023
Not only were the true Agojie violent cutthroats they were also responsible for the massacre and enslavement of millions. According to historians the women were discarded third wives that husbands no longer found worthy of sharing a bed with. King Ghezo was one of the biggest slave traders of his time and trained the discarded women to massacre, sacrifice, enslave and sell men, women and children, no matter the tribe. The film fantasizes that the amazonian women formed their own empowerment group and conquered the white people that invaded them. White characters are sketched with no humanity which makes the action appear cruel instead of intoxicating. In the world of the living, the white people being fought were trying to abolish slavery and succeeded in killing the women instantaneously. Production was handed a bold cast to portray male versions of themselves. What a pity they couldn't find real women to emulate. 05-Jan-2023
Spending all your time fearing death is not living. Independent housewives who feel apathy in their routine will take an ick to numb it. Of course, the daughter blames the ick for making mama forgetful. Maybe forgetting is the key. Dumb teenager believing everything they read on the internet and sending pregnant daddy on a mental loop cycle because she lost all common sense. He spends all his time annoying with german babbling, recounting tidbits of Hitler's art and bragging how it was the foundation for his career. It's time he paid more attention to his wife. Were the people the toxic cloud? It's irrelevant. It doesn't land and when it wants to, it spirals and crashes. The weight is on Driver but his character is unsympathetic. That's what happens when you try to cash in on someone else's legend. Gerwig lends nothing to a nothing woman that needed lots of pap smears and mental hospitalization. Except for the ick nagging daughter, all the kids were cutouts. Every time Cheadle approached to philosophize nonentities I wished Thanos would make him disappear. It yada yadas to death and says nothing. 02-Jan-2023
A bully is a victim before they become a predator. A predator is nothing but an angry child. The children were the core and mumbo jumbo was the calisthenics. The phone was a stretch but gifting someone with heavenly sight left no room for art. They beat the course but failed the test. The boy doesn't figure his way out. The cops are the stoopidest. Impossibility aids. Kids are tortured but ass clowns with dilemmas aren't. Why would a kid remember and know so many missing kids? The serial must grab a kid every two weeks. Why weren't the phone calls from slave boys of the past recounting how they got past their masters? Why didn't the film turn realistic and write all the hints on the walls and actualize via flashbacks? Hawke delivers a stand-in performance. We have no idea who was underneath all those masks. If it can't be thoughtful, exciting or coherent, be a survival guide for sexually abused children. 28-Dec-2022
Daniel Craig returns to torture southern accents and be a dork. Janelle Monae acted better with an accent but not so much as herself. She needs an injection of actor vulnerability. Kathryn Hahn is still a witch. I couldn't see Leslie Odom Jr. and Jessica Henwick through all that glass. Hollywood never took advantage that Kate Hudson is her mother's doppelganger. Bautista was full on daddy and Edward Norton deserves a comeback. Elements of the whodunnit were clever but the whole was overblown. 23-Dec-2022
The movie induces flashbacks to disaster classics that made it tolerable to withstand the subject. The new generation make assorted pieces part of the puzzle. They fit anywhere or not at all. There is an ugly giant troll on the loose and the tree huggers want to coddle it, while the powers that be want to annihilate it. Dude, the bear you're saving is going to rip your head off, they don't give a shit about us, be thoughtful. It does a very big "bad" wrong. They turn his dick into a tail. He drinks too much, ergo, the bulbous nose. He has a preference for innocence, destruction and confusion. Instead of beams pulverizing rocks we get fairytale mumbo jumbo. "Troll" commands you adhere like Captain Sandy and exit like Captain Sandy as soon as the idiot humans show up. 04-Dec-2022
The idea of renting a house from senior landlords living on the property, in the 70s, to shoot a secret porn film plays ludicrously. It opens stinking of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and ends up vomit. This is an auteur's movie. The porn they were creating was supposed to be art. It was another porn stinker. 2 hours of three girls and a cock. The film would've played better as background for orgies. Seniors were represented as Tales From The Crypt old. Ick. Fear of getting old and losing control of sex and the joys that come with it. It stopped smelling like Chainsaw as soon as it tasted like Jaws and went down like Friday the 13th Part Three in 3D. 25-Nov-2022
The most enchanting thing about both films is Amy. When her magic is at full tilt, production continues her flow. Dempsey was saddled with a silly storyline and a "send him away" type direction. Women and men no longer want to fight together. It's women's turn to die for what they believe in. Marsden is a pro at acting douchy but cute. Gabriella was just right. Maya stopped fussing and was funny again. The music was almost but it felt like there was an intruder interrupting the grandeur. Some of the songs are juvenile. Idina Menzel wrecking her throat's gift on shitty songs is a never. They made her sing "Let It Glow," again and again. Her magnificent voice gets a full moon. Amy's everything makes you hungry for more. Suburbia works as a stand-in for a magical life but once true magic coaxes itself into reality the ink starts to dry. They gave no magic equations or rules of limitations that we could realistically follow. What kind of magic is in Andalucia? Why did the queen gain power? Is Andalucia in Wakanda? None of the above. They gave no rules because they didn't want to have to follow them. Dude, that's when the best art is created! Full moon to the production in front and back and a boo hoo to the writers for not coming up with something more substantial to say. 18-Nov-2022
It's so low budget that it couldn't even afford to be one of Bobby Brady's (Brady Bunch) teenage dreams. A smooth twink rebels against his argumentative father and insistently horny sister. He travels into Wonderland with pot in his pocket and a party hang out mentality with anyone except queers. He gets gang raped by a bunch of straight men who cripple him and not. There is a rape scene but it's more hilarious than it is shocking. I couldn't tell if they were shoving things up his ass or fucking him. They dump him somewhere Satan worshippers live. Chief Stew becomes enamored. He is rescued. The deck is revolting against second in command. The captain is away. They do not rescue strangers unless master commands it. Bobby becomes immobilized because his ass hurt. Really, immobilized? He found time for flat on your back sex, though. The captain returns unexpectedly and all hell breaks loose. It doesn't develop triumph or backbone until the very end. It's laughable, langorous and unforgettable. 31-Oct-2022
Jurassic World: Dominion (2022) 
The dinos are stunning and grandiose, the familiar faces are warm, whatever stole Chris Pratt's mojo ain't giving it back and Bryce Dallas Howard would have stolen the whole shebang had someone written in a Tammy Faye Bakker impression. The movie confirms that in order to save the planet, we must die. (You didn't think we were sacrificing for us or our children, did you?) 11-Oct-2022
The witches are back to eat a delicacy known as colored children. No one works harder than Bette and nobody outflanks her. It's her boat. The treat is hard Halloween candy that sometimes melts in your mouth. The trick is to watch without prejudice. 01-Oct-2022
Natalie Portman's linebacker is not the gayest thing about the movie, a bodyless rock pining for another rock is. Are you kidding me? I want to see Thor's beautiful ass devoured by Zeus. 12-Sep-2022
Girlfriend Who Didn't Exist, The (2022)
Grandiose liars are given the opportunity to elaborate. Famous cis boys that call social contacts girlfriends, without intimacy, are unwell. Fake girl can do a pitch perfect girl's voice (behind a screen and a receiver up his asshole) except when he's becoming a real girl. Famous boy is living for everyone but himself. The doc doesn't clarify much. 23-Aug-2022
Fullmetal Alchemist The Revenge of Scar (2022) 
I was enthralled with the animated version because the mythology was expansive, well explained and the leads were cute and courageous. An alchemy accident causes two brothers to drastically change and adapt to auto survival skills through a shady world. The Big Bads were vibrant, the fights creative. The live version lets us remember and appreciate the spectacle without superceding it. 21-Aug-2022
