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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Tacky'

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Ricky Stanicky (2024) No Moons

It doesn't get worst than this. There were only two funny bits, the drowning dog and the girl's hair. 08-Mar-2024

Tags: 2020s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Director Insanity, Disappointment, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Over the Top, Relationships, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Writer Humiliation

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08-Mar-2024


Five Nights At Freddys (2023) Bites

It was difficult to establish how the animatronics were killing people. They never showed it. It was directed for wimps who are scared of horror movies. The reason for living animatronics is an overused one. They couldn't be aliens? How the fuck did that animatronic get in the car? They do not bend easily. How many times did we have to relive Josh's memories? We got it the first time. 07-Mar-2024

Tags: 2020s, Art Devoid, Cliche, Depressing, Director Slouch, Drama, False Action, Fantasy, Horror, Horror Mild, Oncer, Predictable, Preposterous, Silly, Tacky

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07-Mar-2024


Marvels, The (2023) Bites

The film suffers from The Green Lantern and Quantum effect. If the creators wanted to take us to other worlds, the trip needed to be worth it. Skrulls with no power are obsolete. I think they took the green screen too literally. Most of the actors looked like they were talking to the back-heads of stand-ins or more green screens. The ladies became 3 instruments that didn't play well together. Distance was put between them. The glowey thing that Capt. Marvel displays when she's on, reminds one of the Quantum sky. Another action killer was giving the women the same power effect. So we don't distinguish or because it was easier? The big bad could only have gotten better had they cast that crazy lady from the Power Rangers. I thought Dar-Benn was blind for the first few minutes of the film. If she looked down, would her head-piece have fallen off? All the ladies came as they are because hair and makeup were in a rush to return to social media. They looked unkempt and shook. They would never dare look this ratched on the red carpet where fans aren't paying them to create movie magic. Somber heroes zigzagging to nowhere for nobody. I never thought of Monica Rambeau as interesting, I liked Kamala on the smaller screen but... and we all know what Carol Danvers is. The reason I liked female heroines was because they were a break from extremism and added a softer solution to the action and they were beautiful. If women keep denying themselves in order to become men, hugs will be cancelled. They can do anything? Be a girl. Good hair, make-up and dress will fulfill the rest. See: Barbie. Imagine if she was ugly and without sex appeal. No mucho $. Musicland was an in-law family situation humiliation activity. Nobody swags like they care so why bother? Was Frasier the only white man allowed in the building or was he CGId? 07-Feb-2024

Tags: 2020s, Action, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Cold, Comic Book, Depressing, Dialogue Lament, Director Hands Off Approach, Fantasy, Girlie Movie, Lesbian, Over the Top, Predictable, Repetitive, Sad Effects, Sap, Sequel, Shrill Act, Silly, Stink Wigs, Tacky, Timid, TV-like, Writer Humiliation

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07-Feb-2024


Barbie (2023) Whimper

Women can do anything except fight wars, raise non-toxic boys or shut up. Barbie is a politic, a preacher and a bore. Man hate shuffles in so often that enjoyment is stifled. The cast is brilliant. Margo and Ryan were perfect iterations of iconic toys and the support kept up but the story just memes on the same subject, over and over. The film distinguishes the sexes without exploring true intentions or circumstances. The best way for feminists to free themselves from a man's grasp is to never marry and to abolish religions that place them in dire situations. 16-Dec-2023

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Camp, Cheeky Acting, Chemistry, Cliche, Cold, Comedy, Conspiracy Theory, Depressing, Dialogue Lament, Director Insanity, Fantasy, Good Acting, Grating, Inactivity, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Oncer, Political, Preposterous, Pretty, Repetitive, Revenge, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Tedium, Timid, Weird, Writer Humiliation

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16-Dec-2023


Evil Dead Rise (2023) No MoonsEarly Exit

Dickless entry in the Evil Dead series. I fell asleep midway through but saw enough of it not to regret it. 16-Jul-2023

Tags: 2020s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Depressing, Director Hands Off Approach, Disappointment, Drama, Early Exit, Repetitive, Retread, Slow, Tacky, Timid, Vague

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16-Jul-2023


Shazam! Fury Of The Gods (2023) Bites

A Saturday morning kiddie show that plays after the popular ones have aired and kids watch whilst having lunch. It can't shake off the silliness so it embraced it. Bad mistake. It only works if it's funny. Some of the writers asked their children what they would like to see and the parents yucked it up. Elegant ladies of maturity shouldn't have to wear clunky armor especially if they're witches. The villains are not much of a threat. They just need more "home" visits from the family. Why did they pile on so much ick hair and clothing on Hinsou's god? Zachary Levi. His solution when discomfited is to make a face or a nine year's old gesture. His younger alter ego is a teenager on his way to becoming a man. They work as separate units but not as a whole. They copy nothing from each other. Billy's best friend's storyline had the emotional heft that Shazam's didn't. It doesn't even take us on a fantastical journey. It was a scenic bus ride to Walmart. 07-Jun-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, Art Devoid, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Drama, Fantasy, Fatigue, Grating, Musical Bombast, Over the Top, Physical Humor, Preposterous, Repetitive, SciFi, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Wit Crack

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07-Jun-2023


Another Man's Poison (1951) Whimper

Bette's 50s era was full of Lady Davis folklore and drag queen reboots. Lady Davis was forced to compete with herself. A worn out hunk has beef with her husband because he foiled a heist and he's being blamed. Bette is at the height of shifty. She parlays her caricature tics to mixed effects. She is over until somebody fucks with her animal. The feelings reeled a barracuda out of her. The camera decided that Bette's gift was mechanical and that the new way was better. They highlighted her flaws and disheveled her tidiness. The disclosures felt possibly true, Bette's messy art was always entertaining but it's a crappy movie. 10-Apr-2023

Tags: 1950s, By the Numbers, Camp, Corn, Crapfun, Crime Drama, Director Insanity, Drama, Mystery, Over the Top, Psychological, Relationships, Repetitive, Revenge, Star Watt, Suspense, Tacky, Timid, Trashy, Twisty, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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10-Apr-2023


Float (2022) Bites

The best thing about the experiment is the music video at post end. Not for the music but the courage the singer had by being the only thing in the water worth watching. Youths have nothing identifiable to say. They're screaming because their friends keep getting mysteriously killed but have time to gleefully reminisce about partying while continuously drinking. There is no finality or viable explanation. The man holding the camera just drops it at the end. 19-Feb-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Bad Acting, By the Numbers, Camp, Dialogue Lament, Director Experiment, Music Murders, Preposterous, Relationships, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly, Slow, Tacky, Tedium, Vague

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19-Feb-2023


Jeepers Creepers Reborn (2022) Bites

An abortion would have served it right. Black men are not fanatical about visiting voodoo stores and doing horror cosplay. It brings bad mojo. He would have shat his pants. Is anyone aware that the Creeper is a sexual deviant that kills teenage girls and devours soft boys? He wouldn't give two shits about a girl, especially an old one. A pervert with a penchant for boys made him, the Creeper should be illustrated as such. 03-Feb-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Action, Art Devoid, By the Numbers, Cold, Dialogue Lament, Director Hands Off Approach, Drama, Music Murders, Predictable, Preposterous, Relationships, Repetitive, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Timid, Timid Effects

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03-Feb-2023


Troll (2022) Bites

The movie induces flashbacks to disaster classics that made it tolerable to withstand the subject. The new generation make assorted pieces part of the puzzle. They fit anywhere or not at all. There is an ugly giant troll on the loose and the tree huggers want to coddle it, while the powers that be want to annihilate it. Dude, the bear you're saving is going to rip your head off, they don't give a shit about us, be thoughtful. It does a very big "bad" wrong. They turn his dick into a tail. He drinks too much, ergo, the bulbous nose. He has a preference for innocence, destruction and confusion. Instead of beams pulverizing rocks we get fairytale mumbo jumbo. "Troll" commands you adhere like Captain Sandy and exit like Captain Sandy as soon as the idiot humans show up. 04-Dec-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Action, Art Devoid, By the Numbers, Cultural, Dialogue Lament, Disappointment, Drama, Hot Swatch, Preposterous, Silly, Tacky, Wit Crack, Writer Humiliation

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04-Dec-2022


X (2022) Whimper

The idea of renting a house from senior landlords living on the property, in the 70s, to shoot a secret porn film plays ludicrously. It opens stinking of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and ends up vomit. This is an auteur's movie. The porn they were creating was supposed to be art. It was another porn stinker. 2 hours of three girls and a cock. The film would've played better as background for orgies. Seniors were represented as Tales From The Crypt old. Ick. Fear of getting old and losing control of sex and the joys that come with it. It stopped smelling like Chainsaw as soon as it tasted like Jaws and went down like Friday the 13th Part Three in 3D. 25-Nov-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Camp, Creepy, Director Insanity, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Horror, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Silly, Tacky, Trashy, Violent, Weird

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25-Nov-2022


Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022) Bites

Scripting black people to complain about cops and confederate flags is not thoughtful. Killing all the black actors anyway, is not giving a shit. Making me confused about female sexuality is a useless gay time thing. Leatherface is nothing without family dependability. He was the icing on the family cake. A family that celebrated meat, farming and death. Icing without cake is a blob. 22-Feb-2022

Tags: 2020s, Action, By the Numbers, Cultural, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Horror, Over the Top, Porn Violence, Preachy, Repetitive, Retread, Scare Obvious, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Trashy, Wit Crack

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22-Feb-2022


Candyman (2021) No Moons

Non-movie illustration of why "Oscar So White" is still so prevalent. Candyman is stripped of sensual ferocity, opinion and reason. His myth is re-written and implied by puppetry because the talent wasn't inspired to showcase it. The scares couldn't unhinge a cockroach. The deaths are remote with closeup shots of thick red Kool-aid. The violence is hesitant because most black people are petrified of supernatural violence. It scratches the ghetto but refuses to live in it because black people don't want to return there. Whites have gentrified the ghetto and blacks are mad as hell because they weren't given enough time to make their home livable. "Welfare knocked on my door before I had a chance to straighten up." "Bitch, you know white people can't watch good land go to waste." Blacks with dedication and drive enjoy the gentrified lifestyle while critiquing their hosts and avoiding the nasty parts of their neighborhood. This is all supposed to tie in with a confusing Candyman revenge backstory. The candy was uninspired. It should have looked scrumptious and colorful. It looked like granny's recycled Christmas candy. Only fat kids pick that shit up. It wasn't woke enough to have Colman Domingo fuck Candyman. The film required more gays so Candyman could kill the two. Too bad. In what world are there more cops in the neighborhood than community? 31-Jan-2022

Tags: 2020s, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, Cliche, Coincidence Laden, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Gay Swatch, Horror, Indecipherable, Political, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Retread, Silly, Tacky, Timid, Writer Weakness

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31-Jan-2022


Pinocchio (2019) Bites

Someone thought that realizing one of the most horrifying fairy tales to live film was a whimsical idea. The director wastes little time on magic and spends most of it on ugliness. He realized all the threats in a boy's life and all the insanity of the myth. A boy that really isn't a boy is considered a genderless fuck opportunity. Pedos prefer gender non-specific children because it's the baby smell they're after. Pinocchio is the perfect victim. Unique, beautiful, stupid, excited, rebellious and cooperative. The puppet gets enslaved, murdered, robbed, betrayed, hated, abused and exploited. Pinocchio cannot become a boy because his ADD doesn't allow him to sit still long enough to accept love and he's kind of an asshole. I'd be an asshole too if I were created to give hugs and tickles to ugly men. Oops, I was! The director rushes through plot points and changes nothing to make the ordeal acceptable. Why does wood eat? Why doesn't he rust or flake? What is the fairy's deal? His growing nose is a hard-on, not a lie. Jiminy Cricket sucked. It's a horror movie. Becoming a boy only grants him a hole. The world around him still sucks. 29-Dec-2021

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Action, Brutal, Creepy, Drama, Fantasy, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Horror, Indecipherable, Mean Spirited, Preposterous, Scary, Tacky, Tough, Trashy, Twinkie, Violent, Weird

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29-Dec-2021


Outrage, The (1964) Arf

Latino violates fancy woman in front of her uppity husband. Fancy woman lets her guard down and enjoys it. Male toxicity ensues. Several accounts of the rape and murder are presented. Paul Newman was a distraction as a blue-eyed Mexican bandit, with a hulk wig, "grande" dick, grease paint and an "I hate gringos" accent. Most of the actors didn't conquer southern speech. Capt. Kirk played a priest that spoke words as if Shakespeare had written them specifically for him. All the versions add up to a hilarious finale that shouldn't have been. 12-Oct-2021

Tags: 1960s, Accidental Watch, Action, Bad Acting, Brutal, Camp, Daddy Squish, Fatigue, Funny, Hilarious, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preposterous, Repetitive, Silly, Star Watt, Stink Wigs, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Trashy, Twisty, Vague, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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12-Oct-2021




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