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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Ear Prick'

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Down (2001) Whimper

The act is porny, the conversations are ear splitting but the elevator has a wicked sense of humor. 27-Sep-2018

Tags: 2000s, Action Stomper, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Conspiracy Theory, Corn, Director's Touch, Drama, Ear Prick, Funny, Gory, Horror, Indecipherable, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Oncer, Over the Top, Political Satire, Preposterous, Silly, Star Watt, Suspense, Tacky, Tough

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27-Sep-2018


Urban Legend (1998) Bites

Some clever kills is what satiates the legend but the script has trouble lining up the backstories that go with them. 25-Sep-2018

Tags: 1990s, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Comedy, Drama, Ear Prick, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Horror, Hot Swatch, Mystery, Over the Top, Preposterous, Repetitive, Revenge, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense, Tacky, Twinkie

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25-Sep-2018


Eden (2014) Bites

It's an inclusive jock party whose words and direction give no clue as to why they should flex a muscle. 01-Jun-2018

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, Bad Chemistry, Camp, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, False Action, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Inactivity, Indecipherable, Macho Posing, Manipulation, Oncer, Over the Top, Preposterous, Rapey, Revenge, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Tedium

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01-Jun-2018


Justice League (2017) Bites

It will continue to embarrass for as long as production is allowed to churn arid cornpop. They can't orchestrate a thrilling action sequence, the costumes don't befit a hero and it certainly doesn't flatter the artists (everyone clunks around) and the villain seems extracted from an outdated RPG. Cavill wakes up to serve us what's left of the Superman character and Amy Adams and Diane Lane are the only Amazons. Most of the artists left their joy elsewhere.

It needs to look at its animation for inspiration. 14-May-2018

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Comic Book, Corn, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, False Action, Fantasy, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Inactivity, Indecipherable, Loud, Macho Posing, Oncer, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Sad Effects, Silly, Tacky, Ugly Art

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14-May-2018


King Kong (1976) Bites

Jessica overcame it, Jeff squishes what he can from unkempt, the effects now match the script (awful) and Kong is perverted. It's beautiful score deserves a better movie. 18-Apr-2018

Tags: 1970s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Ear Prick, Fantasy, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Mean Spirited, Music Swings, Over the Top, Rapey, Revenge, Star Watt, Tacky, Writer Humiliation

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18-Apr-2018


Psycho III (1986) Whimper

Misdiagnosed. 10-Apr-2018

Tags: 1980s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Corn, Crime Drama, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, Fatigue, Horror, Over the Top, Preposterous, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Tedium, Ugly Art

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10-Apr-2018


Extreme Movie (2008) Bites

It belongs locked in a time capsule. Every teenage boy perversion is enacted without respect or acknowledgement of their desire. It is a catapult of "me too" and a denigration of all sexes. Depicting men and women as competitors in love or sex doesn't bode well for a society hellbent on exposing its normality.

When Matthew Lillard exclaims that he can't say that joke because he has two daughters but continues reading it, the movie and the immature men who made it are slanderously defined. 09-Mar-2018

Tags: 2000s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Conspiracy Theory, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Inappropriate, Macho Posing, Mean Spirited, Oncer, Over the Top, Preposterous, Rapey, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Ugly Art, Weird

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09-Mar-2018


Magnificent Seven, The (2016) Whimper

There is no magnificence.

The actors playact while embodying minute swagger.

The writers fudge a story whose heft relied on outlaws braving to protect a Mexican village that couldn't help themselves from marauders. The victims are mostly white christians which wafts of self-service. Though the cast is inclusive we are not privy to anything more from them than a diversity stamp.

The director lends no distinction or heroism to the action, has no sense of panoramic beauty and no credibility in the western genre. If you let the music tell half the story, your task remains incomplete. 20-Dec-2017

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Comic Book, Conspiracy Theory, Corn, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, False Action, Fatigue, Loud, Macho Posing, Manipulation, Music Murders, Oncer, Over the Top, Preachy, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Revenge, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Tedium, Ugly Art, Western

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20-Dec-2017


How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) Bites

When transcribing a cartoon to live it needs to be cautious not to bolster caricature as it may spark an aneurysm. 09-Nov-2017

Tags: 2000s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Conspiracy Theory, Director's Slice, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, Fantasy, Horror, Inappropriate, Indecipherable, Loud, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Oncer, Over the Top, Preposterous, Revenge, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Unfunny, Weird

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09-Nov-2017


Maniac (2012) No Moons

A bucket of bleach and a scrub brush is quintessential after watching this first-person horror slasher. It knows how to disgust but little else. Elijah, thankfully, spends most of the character's opportunity behind a camera and we got it, he's Frodo no more. Too bad, there are benefits to being liked. 10-Oct-2017

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, Camp, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, Fatigue, Gore, Horror, Over the Top, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Weird

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10-Oct-2017


Wonder Woman (2017) Whimper

I was ready to celebrate everything the Wonder Woman mythology entrenches but I can only laud the idea because the interpretation curtails the triumph.

Themyscira flounders the hardest because accomplished actresses are burdened with harsh and awkward accents to help explain the heroine's dialect. They may be mentally strong women but they can't persuade us they have physical strength. If they really wanted to represent Amazon girl power, challenge actresses who have inhabited physical dynamism and give the fans a rise. Lucy Lawless, Sarah Michelle Geller, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Garner, etc. are waiting in line to be acknowledged and honored.

Gal Gadot was declared Wonder Woman but we don't get to witness her growth or empowerment.

Pine's Steve Trevor undermines Diana by trumpeting himself as an extraordinary alpha that is solely qualified to subdue such a forceful heroine. The writers should have noted that she gives the man the strength as soon as she prefers him. With this role Pine finally fulfills the culmination that is William Shatner.

The weenie foe does nothing to elevate Diana's heroism.

The music manipulates our emotions, the stunts are self-aware, the FX are ponderous and the direction fails to catapult.

I want a Wonder Woman that's not ashamed of her power, that wears the colors of our flag boldly and who shouts for women but fights for everyone.

 08-Oct-2017

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Director's Slice, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, False Action, Fantasy, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Manipulation, Oncer, Over the Top, Preachy, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Sad Effects, Sap, Silly, Tacky, Tedium, Ugly Art

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08-Oct-2017


Big Cube, The (1969) Bites

60s Hollywood had the capacity to disrespect legends by coasting on their names, making them kneel for a crap script and humiliating them to the point that we can't remember why we deified them.

Chakiris was definitely vibing to his master manipulator but I don't want to remember Lana like this. 01-Oct-2017

Tags: 1960s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Corn, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, False Action, Funny, Gay Swatch, Horror, Hot Swatch, Inappropriate, Over the Top, Political Satire, Preachy, Preposterous, Repetitive, Revenge, Romance, Sad Effects, Sentimental, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Suspense, Tacky, Weird

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01-Oct-2017


LaLa Land (2016) BitesEarly Exit

I was ready to be whisked to where magic lives, birds sing and where luscious landscapes enliven. The movie is excited to vent the notion but it doesn't estimate the arduous discipline it takes to make it art. From the expectation that these performers can coast, by doing so little but bring their star charm, the makers have concluded that we can withstand apprehensive dancing, direction and singing. This is not a musical but a high school drama audition. 23-Jul-2017

Tags: 2010s, Brutal, Camp, Corn, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Ear Prick, Early Exit, Fantasy, Hot Swatch, Indecipherable, Manipulation, Music Murders, Musical, Over the Top, Romance, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Weird

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23-Jul-2017


Star Wars: Rogue One (2016) Whimper

I was ready to geek out at this stand-alone side quest but besides Vader and space action sequences at end, there isn't much to delight. The music foretells how we should feel before the action unfolds. The director and editor do not serve the stuntwork which is shown in its raw state where we see them react and fall before a hit. The actors appear glum and forfeited. No hero steps up and no cheers result. The CGI that arises the dead creeps instead of inspires and the independent budget doesn't accelerate its art, it trashes it. 18-Jul-2017

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Director's Slice, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, False Action, Fantasy, Fatigue, Loud, Manipulation, Oncer, Over the Top, Preachy, Predictable, Repetitive, Revenge, Sad Effects, Sap, Silly, Tedium

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18-Jul-2017


Fifty Shades of Black (2016) No MoonsEarly Exit

Indulged, delayed, depraved and puerile whoopee cushion. 31-May-2017

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, Fatigue, Inappropriate, Indecipherable, Macho Posing, Over the Top, Rapey, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Ugly Art, Unfunny

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31-May-2017




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