Movies Posts Tagged as 'Eye Gouge'
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Confessions of a Pop Performer (1975)
It's a constant pile-up you can't stop watching. 25-Sep-2018
Call Me By Your Name (2017)
Its insulting in its timing and the delusion that a teenager's "me too" is a right of passage. The disparity in size (Hammer's giant) and childlike looks (Timothee Chalamet) adds unseemliness to its presentation. Hammer distributes much awkwardness and little desire, maybe because he realized the discomfort of its subject.
Man/boy love is tricky if you don't account for its repercussions. It doesn't represent the gay community but it indicates that straits will stick it to anything and that uniting in sex will not absolve our confusion.
I'll call you what my first lover/daddy/asshole called himself..."bugarron." 07-Aug-2018
Collector, The (2009)
Schooling for psychopaths on how to execute an ugly death. It's bloody torture. 20-Jun-2018
Justice League (2017)
It will continue to embarrass for as long as production is allowed to churn arid cornpop. They can't orchestrate a thrilling action sequence, the costumes don't befit a hero and it certainly doesn't flatter the artists (everyone clunks around) and the villain seems extracted from an outdated RPG. Cavill wakes up to serve us what's left of the Superman character and Amy Adams and Diane Lane are the only Amazons. Most of the artists left their joy elsewhere.
It needs to look at its animation for inspiration. 14-May-2018
Psycho III (1986)
Extreme Movie (2008)
It belongs locked in a time capsule. Every teenage boy perversion is enacted without respect or acknowledgement of their desire. It is a catapult of "me too" and a denigration of all sexes. Depicting men and women as competitors in love or sex doesn't bode well for a society hellbent on exposing its normality.
When Matthew Lillard exclaims that he can't say that joke because he has two daughters but continues reading it, the movie and the immature men who made it are slanderously defined. 09-Mar-2018
Battlefield Earth (2000)
As soon as Travolta opens his mouth to spit fey Shakespearean New York, the attention-span for the story disappears. While you wait for Travolta to stop putting us on you start noticing that the character's rubber hands bend and lay inappropriately, the Eiffel Tower boots adds clunk and slump to their walk and that their pouches swell at attention. I left before any of it made it to my bloodstream. 21-Dec-2017
How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)
When transcribing a cartoon to live it needs to be cautious not to bolster caricature as it may spark an aneurysm. 09-Nov-2017
A bucket of bleach and a scrub brush is quintessential after watching this first-person horror slasher. It knows how to disgust but little else. Elijah, thankfully, spends most of the character's opportunity behind a camera and we got it, he's Frodo no more. Too bad, there are benefits to being liked. 10-Oct-2017
Wonder Woman (2017)
I was ready to celebrate everything the Wonder Woman mythology entrenches but I can only laud the idea because the interpretation curtails the triumph.
Themyscira flounders the hardest because accomplished actresses are burdened with harsh and awkward accents to help explain the heroine's dialect. They may be mentally strong women but they can't persuade us they have physical strength. If they really wanted to represent Amazon girl power, challenge actresses who have inhabited physical dynamism and give the fans a rise. Lucy Lawless, Sarah Michelle Geller, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Garner, etc. are waiting in line to be acknowledged and honored.
Gal Gadot was declared Wonder Woman but we don't get to witness her growth or empowerment.
Pine's Steve Trevor undermines Diana by trumpeting himself as an extraordinary alpha that is solely qualified to subdue such a forceful heroine. The writers should have noted that she gives the man the strength as soon as she prefers him. With this role Pine finally fulfills the culmination that is William Shatner.
The weenie foe does nothing to elevate Diana's heroism.
The music manipulates our emotions, the stunts are self-aware, the FX are ponderous and the direction fails to catapult.
I want a Wonder Woman that's not ashamed of her power, that wears the colors of our flag boldly and who shouts for women but fights for everyone.
Big Cube, The (1969)
60s Hollywood had the capacity to disrespect legends by coasting on their names, making them kneel for a crap script and humiliating them to the point that we can't remember why we deified them.
Chakiris was definitely vibing to his master manipulator but I don't want to remember Lana like this. 01-Oct-2017
Kong: Skull Island (2017)
You have to trample all the human characters in order to enjoy some towering monster mash. Once there, you'll realize it was all premature squirt because not many regarded the material. 24-Sep-2017
They found a clever way to rewrite an exorcism but gave little sense to the "how" and "why." The demons don't procure fear because they hold the possessed in a safety zone: a disco and a boy playing catch with his father? I found myself imagining countless scenarios where the creators could have punched us with intent instead of tapping out. Baby evil was only aspired to itch and not chill and none of Eckhart's refinement spills onto the film's stratosphere. The ending made me chuck(le.) 08-Sep-2017
Eyes of Laura Mars, The (1978)
The reason to watch is to linger lovingly at Faye attempts at acting out of a trashcan. It's fun to watch as she suffers gallantly but even harder to fathom how this antiseptic slasher thinks it deserved to incorporate her. 23-Jul-2017
Star Wars: Rogue One (2016)
I was ready to geek out at this stand-alone side quest but besides Vader and space action sequences at end, there isn't much to delight. The music foretells how we should feel before the action unfolds. The director and editor do not serve the stuntwork which is shown in its raw state where we see them react and fall before a hit. The actors appear glum and forfeited. No hero steps up and no cheers result. The CGI that arises the dead creeps instead of inspires and the independent budget doesn't accelerate its art, it trashes it. 18-Jul-2017