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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Musical'
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A rom-com is conversion therapy for those who don't believe in fairy tales. I saw a handheld camera at the beginning and almost blacked out but then something cute happened. It moved like Grease and had the aroma of a pink lady. It kept me in with mixed results. The music had word limitations and they repeated nonsensical lines that make only cartoon baby sharks squeak. Was no thesaurus available when the music was written? The mean girls were lame and avenged by dorky plans. The cast was bubbly. The lesson was that anybody can be a mean girl. You fix her by allowing her to steal someone else's hot dick to fuck and hope she never calls you again. 10-Jun-2024
The movie is far from great but TC molds it into his own Barbie. He charms us with all of his almost complete skills. The Oompa Loompa was splendid. Olivia Colman let her boobs out and was funny. The support were astute. The whole thing was fun because Chalamet is a magician that makes us believe that his strive for excellence overcomes story limitations. 09-Mar-2024
"I would have made Prince Eric an enslaved black royal on a slave boat that crashed in the sea. Black Ariel saves him but must fight a racist society to get him back to his tribe. If you're going to invest in a culture, invest. 06-Sep-2023
Halle Bailey is resplendent with no significant voice. The movie is not her fault. Javier Bardem created enough quake to make me want to suck his dick under the table. My apologies Lady Penelope, it's only a dream. Fish and birds suffered from unfortunate casting and drawing. Lady McCarthy was doing fake Brady Bunch Shakespeare with an SNL accent. Ok. If she actually sings like that why does she sing crappy in the commercials? Prince Eric sang only one song. Thank god! I would have never filmed that. Marshall had trouble imagining and most of the cast were confused. It's the best film Marshall has directed but it's hollow. 06-Sep-2023
It's loud, expensive, unbelievable, daring, striking, slamming and has two super daddies that have much to say. Daddies from opposite sides of the revolution become hidden identity bffs with loads of heart and muscle to give. The white witch makes a return to the screen. She is half in charge and making daddies' lives miserable. She snatches a baby sister from a daddy's tribe and enslaves her to do her nails as she controls the other by giving him power to enforce the law without limitations. White Poppa controls the army and the audacity. I got lost in the world and accepted everything that defied because everything it conquered was so joyous. 20-Dec-2022
Elements of war, religion and death are added and foxes, donkeys and the prevalence of debauchery are eliminated. Pin is not a mischievous boy looking for trouble, he's a learning apprentice finding the meaning of life. Geppetto is a grieving father whose child's death he blames on war and the director blames on Jesus. The church was the catalyst for rejection of a miracle from nowhere. The animation ravishes, the spoken actors convey and del Toro speaks from the heart. He made Pinocchio likable and Geppetto understandable. 11-Dec-2022
It's a director's movie. Cast participation didn't matter. The artists were playing shadows of legends and not inhabiting any of them. It's ok because the director razzle dazzled us while all on camera did as they were told. 08-Dec-2022
The most enchanting thing about both films is Amy. When her magic is at full tilt, production continues her flow. Dempsey was saddled with a silly storyline and a "send him away" type direction. Women and men no longer want to fight together. It's women's turn to die for what they believe in. Marsden is a pro at acting douchy but cute. Gabriella was just right. Maya stopped fussing and was funny again. The music was almost but it felt like there was an intruder interrupting the grandeur. Some of the songs are juvenile. Idina Menzel wrecking her throat's gift on shitty songs is a never. They made her sing "Let It Glow," again and again. Her magnificent voice gets a full moon. Amy's everything makes you hungry for more. Suburbia works as a stand-in for a magical life but once true magic coaxes itself into reality the ink starts to dry. They gave no magic equations or rules of limitations that we could realistically follow. What kind of magic is in Andalucia? Why did the queen gain power? Is Andalucia in Wakanda? None of the above. They gave no rules because they didn't want to have to follow them. Dude, that's when the best art is created! Full moon to the production in front and back and a boo hoo to the writers for not coming up with something more substantial to say. 18-Nov-2022
The conception in Spielberg's imagination is fully realized when it opens. As soon as other elements take control the vision becomes duller. Ariana DeBose would have reached untouchable had she toned it. She was an anxious cheerleader. The musical score needed a lot more oomph. The original soundtrack had the voices echoing in the streets because they were the only voices in the street. The music has been prettified and unchallenged. Ansel Elgort is miscast as "anyone" because he doesn't look like he feels anything. I love Rita and she deserves to be in it. As soon as Spielberg settles into magic a bad accent with no hunger ruins it. The gymnasium edit had me taking deep breadths of joy but somebody decided to cut offline which killed the rhythm and choked the climax. Spielberg is a phenomenon whose films do best when everyone can realize his vision. Very few on this film could. 02-Mar-2022
A talented cast is assembled to remake a classic remade too many times with bigger bluster. A downfall of blockbusters but not of little films. They can sneak in some truth without being punished. It's a parody that attempts to bring circumstances, thoughts and decisions to the shenanigans. Idina has grade A moments in song and in soul sharing. Billy brought his showmanship. The prince passed the "inferno" test with a flip and a voice. We waited for Minnie Driver to awake and when it happens, it is fitting. 007 hits his marks like a gunslinger. Cabello looks like a waitress from different eras in all of her guises but she can sing, act, charm and have fun. I had fun. It belongs to a future cult. 13-Feb-2022
Spider-man split open his asshole and we tasted it. The flavors were acidic and international. Like a caesar salad. Miranda covers an artist that succeeded without musicality because he's an artist that also succeeds without it. When did Spider-Man become Doc from "Back To The Future?" Andrew is its good thing, Robin de Jesus is a missed opportunity and Judith Light was too jewish. Vanessa Hudgens was the only artist that understood the piece of crap she was in and relaxed to our enjoyment. Bad music and immature storytelling equal forgotten art. 24-Dec-2021
Two pretty young things are arrested for vagrancy and swimming naked on a journey to Hollywood. Judge Judy gives them a choice, work on an agricultural farm or go to prison. Bubbleheads decide to pick cotton. Cotton pickers are rare and farmers are using the prisoners to make a profit. The farm is run by a Red Superman that enforces more than he preaches. He unleashes killer dogs on pregnant teens, serves them dog food, dehydrates them, kills, terminates, rapes, blackmails and threatens. Yet, every night, after picking cotton all day and eating dog food, the all gender prisoners find a way to perform a rock n' roll number. Red Superman is secretly married to Judge Judy. Judge Judy's gorgeous son starts working on the farm and catches the eye of the younger sister. Gorgeous son becomes weary of commandment and investigates. Judge Judy is plastered with red dick. She knows nothing. The musical numbers scream immediate cancellation but the performers look so good pushing it. Mamie Van Doren was a sex gift that calypsoed. She worked her butt off entertaining the boys. Is it historically credible that only white people, hispanics and lesbians committed all of America's crimes? The lesbian was a pisser. Puff prison pulp fun. 20-Jun-2021
As a child I was terrified that the corniness of the film would kill me so I never bothered to watch it. It's corny with dragon balls. Green dragon appears to a runaway slave in need of help. The mythology of why the dragon appears or who sent him is slight. The boy's buyers are backwoods insane with a penchant for punishing children with violence and physical labor. Little boy slave flees with his dragon to Karentown where he meets the liberated mom of his magical dreams in a town not easily convinced by his dirty face. Elliot the dragon is not as big as you'd expect, probably because a kid imagined him, he's green with fairy wings and a mohawk. I thought he was going to talk. He does not talk. He murmurs? He also acts like a bumbling dog and can become invisible. You can feel the smallness of the town and the film. It's quaint with great aspirations. 16-Feb-2021
When I was in high school I thought white people made up the idea of proms for the purpose of Hollywood entertainment. It wasn't until my 4th year that I noticed a prom announcement on the school bulletin board. Holy crap! Those stupid dances are real. It wasn't part of my culture and no one in my family ever met anyone who went to one. I can't celebrate the idea of adults hijacking a prom to allow a same sex couple to participate. The musical is a whirlwind of gay propoganda. I'm tired of watching gay films that suppress us into political statements. LGBTQ teens are committing suicide at hostile rates because we refuse to acknowledge that our lives suck which means they don't get any answers. Unless we start supplying our babies with ways to cope with their lives there is no celebration. 13-Dec-2020
Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey (2020) 
The choreography was a bit frenzied and tough for such a whimsical tale. The contraptions didn't work without magic so is the protagonist an inventor, a wizard or both? The music didn't hold or break. The cast was enthusiastic and multi-talented. The costumes, the sets, the effects and the hairstyles clinched it and brought much of it to life. The tale would sometimes play it by ear and veer off but the enchantment persisted. 16-Nov-2020
Married At First Sight/90 Day Fiancee. Chinese immigrants curtail their visa wait by UPSing themselves to San Francisco. A father and his well-bred daughter search San Francisco for the man whose family promised his family betrothal to his daughter. Prospect is a bad boy gangster, with gambling addictions, alcohol overconsumption and love for loose women. Picture bride's contract is traded like a football to the father of a son whose fucking Prospect's side piece. A third woman is gunning for the bachelor of Chinatown but she is easily discarded. The lyrics refuse to gell. There are no rhythms or rhymes to make us remember them. The dance sequences fare better except that the bungle edits rendered the hard work flawed. San Francisco is a colored gingerbread house. The traditions are a bit sticky but it's a pleasant world to live in. 11-Nov-2020
