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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Sap'

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Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale (2010) Arf

It delineates the first Santa, full of godlike vengeance and destruction. The film parodies like a summer blockbuster with striking imagery and a cheerleading score. It chugs along, never delivering the titular monster and rabidly tugging at our hearts. 05-Nov-2019

Tags: 2010s, Action, Camp, Comedy, Comic Book, Corn, Daddy Squish, Director's Art, Drama, Fantasy, Foreign, Funny, Sort of, Horror, Oncer, Over the Top, Political Satire, Pretty, Sap, Silly, Timid, Weird

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05-Nov-2019


Alladin (2019) Arf

All the boys needed testosterone shots on vocals. Guy Ritchie has the balls to make a dream come true but has no audacity to eject it with soul. Smith is an imposing genie that computes the gay with little gumption. Mr. Massoud (Aladdin) squishes triumphantly but with too much modern awareness. Naomi Scott (Jasmine) is the only with a voice but she is too liberated in her femininity to convey the struggles of Jasmine's past. Marwin Kenzari squishes delightfully as a person but lends no voice or stature to Jafar. Ritchie brings as many things to life as he killed. 22-Oct-2019

Tags: 2010s, Action, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Camp, Comic Book, Director's Touch, Disappointment, Drama, Fantasy, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Kool Effects, Music Swings, Over the Top, Pretty, Romance, Sap, Writ w/Possibilities

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22-Oct-2019


Meg, The (2018) Arf

Super shark, super daddy and super action. Nothing else matters. 19-Sep-2019

Tags: 2010s, Action, Action Stomper, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Horror, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Sap, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense

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19-Sep-2019


Crazy Rich Asians (2018) Woof

The presentation is a pristine and elegant throwback to the great traditions that made us and the new ones that maintain us. Actor likability is high, writing vibrates and its style is effervescent. 14-Sep-2019

Tags: 2010s, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Enthusiastic, Funny, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Hot Swatch, Music Swings, Romance, Sap, Sentimental, Sweet, Writ Tight

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14-Sep-2019


All Eyes On Me (2017) Bites

I don't understand the sanctification. Only reality befits his truth. He was a musician with a thug problem. 29-Nov-2018

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, By the Numbers, Camp, Conspiracy Theory, Corn, Drama, False Action, Fantasy, Fatigue, Inappropriate, Macho Posing, Manipulation, Oncer, Over the Top, Preposterous, Sap, Shrill Act, Timid, TV-like

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29-Nov-2018


Ready Player One (2018) Woof

The door to Spielberg's imagination never closes. He is most brilliant when he transfers his thoughts to the eye (camera.) The Shining and Chucky were unhinged odes and asides of established mastery. Regrettably, the writing and acting get displaced whilst catching up. I would thrill to see the meister embrace his dark side. 27-Nov-2018

Tags: 2010s, Action Stomper, Beautiful, Director's Art, Drama, Fantasy, Hot Swatch, Kool Effects, Over the Top, Sap, SciFi, Suspense

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27-Nov-2018


Fist Fight (2017) No MoonsEarly Exit

Instead of expounding on the challenges of education they blast the ridiculousness of adult immaturity. The overload of stereotypes swats the funny. 23-Nov-2018

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Ear Prick, Early Exit, Fatigue, Loud, Macho Posing, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Oncer, Over the Top, Preachy, Predictable, Preposterous, Sap, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Unfunny

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23-Nov-2018


Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn (1982) Woof

It's an old friend I had no idea I made. It's everything it pretends to be. 12-Nov-2018

Tags: 1980s, Bad Acting, Camp, Chemistry, Classic, Comic Book, Conspiracy Theory, Daddy Squish, Decent FX, Director's Slice, Drama, Fantasy, Funny, Good Acting, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Political Satire, Pretty, Revenge, Sap, SciFi, Sentimental, Sequel, Squish Alert, Suspense, Tough, TV-like, Twisty, Wit Snit

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12-Nov-2018


Black Panther (2018) Whimper

Gods and goddesses blessed with magical resources and riches hide under a celestial bubble fighting for their survival but sharing very little of it with the world and the neighbors they seem to emulate.

The accents waver, the muscle is weak and the girls fare better but not by much. The beauty of color keeps it alive but the 70's mod and religious adherence bring it outmoded corniness.

I celebrate its political success as I await to see an ethnic hero that embodies the film world with the same grace as its counter does. We have to start somewhere. 24-Jun-2018

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Comic Book, Disappointment, Drama, False Action, Fantasy, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Inactivity, Macho Posing, Oncer, Political Satire, Preachy, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Sap, Silly, Star Watt, Tedium, Timid Effects

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24-Jun-2018


Brillantes (2014) Whimper

It's an ode to American action farce from another time except the makers weren't privy to any of the good ones. The leads have bygone ethnic daddy squish, chemistry and lashes of quick wit. The film has a reset button, treats women like chess pieces and has no identity. I'm not figuring it out for them. 20-Feb-2018

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Crime Drama, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Drama, Fantasy, Fatigue, Foreign: Spanish, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Indecipherable, Macho Posing, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Political Satire, Preposterous, Sap, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Tacky, Weird

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20-Feb-2018


Office Christmas Party (2016) Whimper

There are moments where saccharin and fraternity are cast aside to serve impish amusement, like Aniston snapping to a bratter to go fuck herself, but it's mostly underwritten sitcom blather incapable of boosting their TV Q. 23-Dec-2017

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Comedy, Comic Book, Drama, False Action, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Holiday, Loud, Macho Posing, Oncer, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Revenge, Sap, Sequel, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, TV-like

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23-Dec-2017


Birth of a Nation (2015) Howl

The prejudgement was swatted as soon as the harsh reality of what the birth entailed was. The only reason to relive this grave stain in history is to account for a particular untapped event. The film was annihilated by an unproven crime from politically correct assassins but the importance of the film resonates truth.

White man deluded a benevolent slave to learn the bible, adapt their baptist religion (within privileged limitations) and to spread it to his brethren to cause guilt within the black community and to quell the savage soul. The power of the word exalted the white man and placed the black community at their mercy for fear of going to hell. Black preacher gains insight as his community continues to suffer barbarities and sexual perversions from God respecting owners and forms a revolution.

It's a group effort where nothing necessarily stands out except the facts, the inhumanity and the confusion that black people have adopted white man's religion when it was His word that enabled enslavement. 07-Nov-2017

Tags: 2010s, Action, Brutal, Director's Slice, Drama, History, Hot Swatch, Political, Rapey, Revenge, Romance, Sad, Sap, Scary, Sentimental, Suspense, Touching, Twisty, Writ Tight

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07-Nov-2017


Wonder Woman (2017) Whimper

I was ready to celebrate everything the Wonder Woman mythology entrenches but I can only laud the idea because the interpretation curtails the triumph.

Themyscira flounders the hardest because accomplished actresses are burdened with harsh and awkward accents to help explain the heroine's dialect. They may be mentally strong women but they can't persuade us they have physical strength. If they really wanted to represent Amazon girl power, challenge actresses who have inhabited physical dynamism and give the fans a rise. Lucy Lawless, Sarah Michelle Geller, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Garner, etc. are waiting in line to be acknowledged and honored.

Gal Gadot was declared Wonder Woman but we don't get to witness her growth or empowerment.

Pine's Steve Trevor undermines Diana by trumpeting himself as an extraordinary alpha that is solely qualified to subdue such a forceful heroine. The writers should have noted that she gives the man the strength as soon as she prefers him. With this role Pine finally fulfills the culmination that is William Shatner.

The weenie foe does nothing to elevate Diana's heroism.

The music manipulates our emotions, the stunts are self-aware, the FX are ponderous and the direction fails to catapult.

I want a Wonder Woman that's not ashamed of her power, that wears the colors of our flag boldly and who shouts for women but fights for everyone.

 08-Oct-2017

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Director's Slice, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, False Action, Fantasy, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Manipulation, Oncer, Over the Top, Preachy, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Sad Effects, Sap, Silly, Tacky, Tedium, Ugly Art

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08-Oct-2017


Hidden Figures (2016) Howl

Every time the director slides the film towards slush, the writers thwart and the actors' heart scream louder to remind us what the purpose is. It was educational, I enjoyed the time spent and I respect the history. The ladies are a dream team and I'd love to see them recreate "9 to 5." They're ready. 17-Sep-2017

Tags: 2010s, Director's Slice, Drama, Funny, Good Acting, Manipulation, Political, Sap, SciFi, Sentimental, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet, Writ Tight

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17-Sep-2017


Star Wars: Rogue One (2016) Whimper

I was ready to geek out at this stand-alone side quest but besides Vader and space action sequences at end, there isn't much to delight. The music foretells how we should feel before the action unfolds. The director and editor do not serve the stuntwork which is shown in its raw state where we see them react and fall before a hit. The actors appear glum and forfeited. No hero steps up and no cheers result. The CGI that arises the dead creeps instead of inspires and the independent budget doesn't accelerate its art, it trashes it. 18-Jul-2017

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Director's Slice, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Eye Gouge, False Action, Fantasy, Fatigue, Loud, Manipulation, Oncer, Over the Top, Preachy, Predictable, Repetitive, Revenge, Sad Effects, Sap, Silly, Tedium

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18-Jul-2017




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