TV Posts Tagged as 'Horror'
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Below Deck: Mediterranean (2016-)
Reunion 2. Drug converse lingered too long. We need to accommodate the mentally impaired so they can joyfully do their sexually abusive jobs without killing anyone. That was the safety feature the Goddess was trying to implement. It works both ways, the drugs are illegal but a psychosis strike is no joke. The moment we enter a doctor's office, we are all drug addicts. The goddess struck down the captain with a thunderbolt as Malia armed herself like a gunslinger. Chef fuck was puppyish and backstabbing as he snitched that being fingered by Deck Ratched is a threat to his life. The ratched played it as feminine and as hopeless as a butch face allows whilst receiving glaring looks from daddy captain. Is pretty Jesus allowed to say, Oh Jesus? That was discomfiting. The lord doesn't give a shit about drugs, women issues or life policies. He's Jesus and he needs to fuck. 27-Oct-2020
Reunion. It was Hannah sabotage. All political and aesthetic arguments were won by women. They had Hannah to blame for everything, even how bad the chef's food tasted. The ratched was demure, the captain was tuna of the sea, Andy zipped his body into a zippo in case anything got mistook and Jesus was pushed aside like the God no longer required. Welcome to New Poseidon. 19-Oct-2020
The rocket liberated Jesus so others could worship him. Mistake. A goddess that begs on her knees and turns her tears into oceans is not worthy of his majesty. He's an experience not a flight. Deck Ratched should be commended for steering the boat and controlling her hen (Chef Fuck.) Alex was commended for being a nasty fuck that cares. Bugs is efficiency. Aesha is a jolt. Captain Sandy gets an outstanding pretense award for wishing Chef Fuck and Ratched well when Ratched had already confessed to her how she was going to dump him, whilst snogging in bed. (It's called Gaydar.) 12-Oct-2020
Aesha had a priceless reaction to the rocket's complaint that no one is allowed to touch pretty jesus butt during group photos. Aesha never heard of relationship confinement rules but she complied with the goddess' request and snorted to the audience. "My friends and family do it all the time, what would I do with his butt anyway, I don't have a penis," or something like that. Deck Ratched gave Chef Fuck an ass rubdown and he flitted about for the rest of the charter. 07-Oct-2020
When someone questions another's sexuality for provocation she probably does it because they want it, have tried it and want it again. Malia may not be a lesbian but she dates sweet n' low. Chef Fuck couldn't do a thing without deck Ratched. The captain was content just to find another dick to kick onboard now that dickhand was chained up. Alex was asked by empowered women who his boat bitch was as dickhand rattled his chains underground and cried for help. The pretty one decided that his Jesus skills could impart horny rich frumps to bump the tip and maybe make Goddess cancel that Bali trip. Aesha is a social worker. She basically bonked out because there were emotions and jealousies oozing from the rocket's mouth. "That bitch is crazy, relationships don't look like that no more. Google it." 28-Sep-2020
Nurse Ratched (2020-)
Finale. Daddy Murphy and co. told me to fuck off. The pieces of art they were building got torn down, the unexplainable released the story from reality and the artists arthritic attack did not allow them to finish with a master stroke. Bummer. 29-Sep-2020
S1E7. Judy Davis titillated, Paulson skyrocketed, the doctor (Jon Jon Briones) scratched, Charlie Carver was endearing and Amanda Plummer itched.
One more to go before I tell Daddy Ryan to fuck off. 28-Sep-2020
S1E6. Jennifer Salt excused the dik crammed in Finn's butt to let some of the air out. He performed a beautiful Hitchcock sex scene. Cynthia Nixon demanded respect and got it. Judy Davis giggled. Jon Jon's doctor is a character whose death we are looking forward to. Nurse Dolly needed to remain stupid and fan worshipping to make the crime saga pop. Vincent D'Onofrio Jacked Nurse Ratched with just one word. Paulson's close-up had me holding on to my chair whilst Daddy Ryan felt me up. You motherfucker. 26-Sep-2020
S1E5. Paulson continues to polish her art. Judy Davis steals it by being the most ratched. Cynthia Nixon exudes a mature woman's warmth and dangerous idolatry. Finn Witrock looks yummier but somebody fucked the "it" out of him. I hope its just bad direction. No offense directors. There are beautiful spaces, delightful scenes and a Hitchcock orchestration that makes us swoon but I still don't see what this Ratched has in common with the ultimate Ratched. (I never imagined ultimate Nurse Ratched being "cute" in her youth.) 24-Sep-2020
It's not really Nurse Ratched it's more like a dichotomy of the Atelier lesbian Playstation game series. Rorona, Sophie and Atelier Esha are some of my favorites. It was always the same character with a surgically unblemished witch. That's what I need to tell myself to accept the sumptuous surroundings and the opulent cast. It's been prettified, sensationalized and horrified. I was impressed by the first episode and confused by the second. Is Nurse Ratched supposed to smirk at the camera? Nurse Ratched is a horror not a horror film. Is women empowerment a threat? Do we report it? Sarah Paulson serves it elegantly, poisonous and charmed. Judy Davis flambeid, Finn Wittrock dislocated himself, the eye of Murphy distracts but it also expands and disintegration occurs. The Hitchcock tunes are seductive. Change her name and we might be cool. Nurse Karen? 21-Sep-2020
Lovecraft Country (2020-)
I wish the production would ignore whites the way they did us because white men as devil diatribe is tired. The horror inhabits everything in history that we celebrated with no punch. I want to celebrate who we are, should be, can be, not something we never were. Wasting a beautiful cast on nonsense. 31-Aug-2020
The Jefferson clap was joyous, ex-President to Jorel was cheek and daddy brick stripped with comic book accuracy. The cast is in it but the words don't feel them. Too much confusion to be fixated on anything. I'm confused because my old head can't grasp it or because the words are slippery. Exactly. Its biggest problem is fixating on not humiliating itself in the portrayal of people that were. The people whose courage we still remember. 23-Aug-2020
Amiably cast, historically vibrant but returning the black man to when he had no power does us no good. (Wos included.) A scare happens when you don't expect it. White cops versus saints versus action heroes. There's only one answer. The three protagonists are full of huff and puff when it's historically known that most people didn't stand up at that time. That's why we're here. It's insulting to the few that famously dared. The big bang threat was unexpectedly absurd and depressing. (Daddy brick needs to get naked.) 17-Aug-2020
Too Hot To Handle (2020-)
No sex games, stripper parties or porn stars performing anatomy tricks. No Casa De Amor with an hour free of rules to tempt anyone. A lame exercise in controlling the libido does not a better date candidate make and I have no idea what point it's trying to make. (The winner takes home about $12.00 after taxes.) 19-Apr-2020
The norm is hornier than I thought. Love Island Castaways land on Mt. Celibacy and are tortured into going straight. The women are boob jocks and the men prance around blowing bro bubbles. The understanding is that what an independent woman wants, is a servant. It's not daring or tacky, not willing to titillate on a channel that permits it and not willing to locate a winning politic. "Tom Holland future" is an eerie panty shredder, women are still reaching for the biggest/complicated things, unruly racism is itching closer to our faces and Jesus left because he couldn't stand them. 18-Apr-2020
Summer Of Fear (1978)
Family inherits an itchy cousin that steals everything precious, teens take for granted... like dad. Thank god, there is a scream queen (Blair,) a future nanny (Drescher) and a capable director (Craven) on the case. Crap fun. 10-Apr-2020
Tiger King (2020-)
S1E3. I'm neither addicted, intrigued, impressed, or willing to give a shit. 01-Apr-2020
I tuned in out of curiosity and to give its subject, the benefit of the doubt. I wasn't raised in an environment where I thought hooligans were cute and my idea of celebrating such buffoonery leaves me speechless. Not one soul appears to have one and the glorification of fake swagger has me flatlining. I don't believe in fucking with mother nature or God's fucking plan and I don't believe in making a profit from exploiting it.
(If I change my mind I'll expose myself again.) 01-Apr-2020
October Faction (2020-)
"The Americans" in the Buffyverse with its own ideas.
Twins united is a powerful concoction. He's gay with no tolerance for sweetness and of suppressed privilege. She questions why her life doesn't fulfill her essence. They both do everything to upset their parents. Their awakening untangles excitedly.
Family history keeps the mythology pressing on.
Daddy has a gun, grandma has a gun, they all have a gun but no one grips it like mama.
The show handles its business like a bullet - straight through - no bullshit - not for squeaky screamers.
"Big Bad" seems to be representing.
There are a variety of monsters, entanglements and enlightenments for an open world of writing fun stuff. 29-Jan-2020
Invitation To Hell (1984)
It was a film better tolerated in the present but still a victim of its limitations.
There are golden nuggets:
Wes Craven kept it tight. The spacesuit caper and some action sequences spit art
Soleil Moon Frye does a spot-on imitation of Golem, before his time
La Lucci is a playful and committed demonic force. Tacky with hilarity, bitchiness and nerve
Robert Urich was pretty, in charge and in demand.
Witcher, The (2019-)
Daddy is something else but it was the ladies that kept me glued. 18-Jan-2020
Of course, I'm disquieted by the froggish whisper of the Witcher but he delivers comitted action moves and steady alpha charisma. Interspersed characterization maintains the show's freshness. (Is it part of its mythology that all pretty twinks get killed?) 15-Jan-2020
Unsettling, The (2019-)
It does not unsettle because there is no intrigue, sharp scare edits or anything besides Holly Taylor to give a damn about. 13-Jan-2020
Leave it to California ("the Hellmouth") to turn a serial into a romantic victim. The pyschology was bi-polar and the disentanglements were happenstance and charred. I'm not excited to see a third season. 31-Dec-2019
The thrill of the cum trampled by a kick in the balls. The delicacies of love entrenched by intrinsic mind bending. Badgley steals the crown structuring the depth of his humanity and indignation. 20-Apr-2019
A Christmas Carol (2019-)
The legend of Scrooge modernized for a realistic mind.
It could've done with some trimming but it still shined.
Guy Pearce dashes, preys and rips as Scrooge. He deduces everything and everyone but himself. His softness towards animals was clever and the "humbugs" were well-earned.
Vinette Robinson (Mary Cratchit) deserves kudos for supplying it with its heart and its threat.
Joe Alwyn had passionate battles with Scrooge that eclipsed the baby blues.
The modern is simple. Scrooge represents every blogger with a gripe that can no longer concede to ideology...the spirits are the influencers, the magic makers and the Gladys Kravitz.' "Bully that man until he burns to the ground or apologizes."
The clues unlock in gift boxes. The heart was put in all the right places. Surprising the viewer with a repetitive tradition is no easy task. Respect.
We all have a Scrooge that we are safe from, whilst we live on the other side, except it's getting harder to stay there. 22-Dec-2019
V Wars (2019)
The process of becoming a vampire and its side effects are so swift that we are not allotted the time necessary to empathize with them. A kickass slayer (Laura Vandervoort) and some popcorn fun, liven it. 15-Dec-2019
The dialogue seems cobbled together from overused scripts. The bromance and action scintillate in a broth that may contain no nutritional value. 09-Dec-2019
American Horror Story: 1984 (2019-)
S9E9. The Murphyverse met the Whedonverse and it was magical. 20-Nov-2019
S9E7. Standalone horror perfection. 01-Nov-2019
Am I going to have to take viagra for the rest of the season? I never thought I'd need it, but ok. 26-Sep-2019
Simplicity is the best tailored suit for horror. The mythology is trembly and the franchise is freshening up.
Gus Kentworthy can feed a hungry gay senior trailer park with a strip and a flex. Emma Roberts is making all the right choices. Cody Fern is still holding back a layer. Matthew Morrison's penis is LOL. Leslie Grossman works better alone. Billie Lourd wants to steal it and Papa Murph is initiating another squirt test. 22-Sep-2019
90 Day Fiance: The Other Way, Tell All (2019)
The silences were as creepy as the perjury. The individuals allowed the worst to happen to them because they misconstrued social media's message of full acceptance. When danger is involved, you allow mental clarity to check in not ask it to make you blind. It was an unintentional Halloween special that intrigued and horrified with no special thought. We yelled at the screen but they didn't listen. Everyone knows that Cinderella marrying Shrek is bad. 21-Oct-2019