TV Posts Tagged as 'Squish Alert'
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Below Deck: Mediterranean (2016-)
The guests were of the masterly type. A grunt called Hannah Bugs Bunny. That's okay. Hannah called them assholes. Oysters made Hannah hop like a service animal for the rest of the charter.
Captain got dirty.
The rocket is about to land.
Pete knows how to eat and suck on meat bones.
Kiko kicks ass.
That's a fine pretty table, Bugs. 05-Jul-2020
There's a dickhand on board.
Hannah shut the base of an Ace, handled children like flopping fish and got pied in the face.
Captain pied crew members in their face.
The men denied, apologized and mind plotted... revenge.
A rocket was launched.
Kiko did his thing. 24-Jun-2020
Hannah frightened her employee.
Lara sought battle with Hannah by scary military code.
Chef Kiko. I'd lick his plates and nothing else.
The deckhands. Something you mechanically bull ride because you're wrecked.
Neither scientist or cis straight I be to recognize that Jessica is a rocket. (Don't explode.)
Don't call her sweetheart, sweetie or any words with calories. Call her daddy White.
Captain Sandy is commanding more than a boat. Good for her. 15-Jun-2020
Captain Sandy finally twirled her balls and her skirt. 25-Sep-2019
The Flintstones put aside shenanigans to celebrate hard work but only the certified kind. Gifted is out, snobbery is forever. 20-Jul-2019
Wet snouts all season. 12-Sep-2018
I guess its okay to present a woman with an unknown penis if it has vodka in it. 18-Jul-2018
The client reference sheet for food exemplifies how the rich can add waste to the environment. 13-Jun-2018
Rules and liability specifications are locked, there's room for us to guess which crew member will fuck up the hardest and the first clients were "Plantation Rich" (they think having money means they pay for enslavement.) 16-May-2018
Highlights include a lady captain and a lamentable pup, love-thrashed by a pocket siren that exhumes growls and sniffs from the male crew. Hannah quips her way through most of it but then succumbs to the lunacy that all are indulging in. Kate, your turn. 16-Aug-2017
It's everything the initial is yet augmented in the unbalanced crew department. The commander seems perplexed by his spiky helpmates and we shall be banqueted until our brains too become unhinged. It's a preferable fix to the housewives and it fulfills AHS: Asylum munchies. The hottest is the most baked. 30-Jun-2016
Dick Van Dyke Show, The (1961-1966)
Brilliant mad men and women. 30-Jun-2020
Love Island Australia (2018-)
I missed the UK version so much that I resorted to this backup. This is a different animal, full of seriousness and ferocity.
The men are cave dwellers and the women, the suppliers that keep toxic men conquering.
If all a woman wants is bigness, handsomeness, grunting and darkness you are forsaking the feminist dream.
The brutality of what each sex stands for baffles me. 29-Jun-2020
The sea bursts with trans merms, foreign landers and common ground.
The throuple endangers itself for the esteem of want and need.
Eline Powell stamped her signature on otherworldly and frightening beauty.
An interracial cast that realistically blends.
The mythology holes don't stop me from digging it.
The aqua war delivered TV best.
The characters can't stop me from caring for it.
Women own the water that men feed from.
It's an analogy for many things but the message is to respect all life.
Beautiful colors of the universe are united to show us their TV Q.
The daddies are pretty big things, rescuing respectfully and allowing the women, heroism.
The throuple has me banging my head. It's hot, unique, eek and curious.
The mythology is well done, the effects don't suck and my favorite merman is chocolate. 23-Jun-2020
S1E3. I'm getting Kyle XY jitters along with Carrie mermaid spooks. It takes us away from the muck and asks that we be entertained. 16-Jun-2020
House of Flowers (2018)
S3. They smeared dark paint and punched holes into what could have been a masterpiece. Everything we cherished was punished, everything celebrated, got cursed and everything funny, nagged. The backstory was a cheap attempt to keep us interested in the life of a woman that presently doesn't exist. It's hurtful and pointless. Everything gay has become annoyance and everything Paulina De La Mora has been shredded. The only thing left is the frame. 29-May-2020
Scouring the family axis with joy. 02-Oct-2019
Normal People (2020-)
I quit after two episodes for its robotic love story and for making a half, feel like a full hour. If its purpose is to instruct us on how to navigate teen angst, sex and love, I can't empathize. By twelve, I and most of my brethren were already bona fide sluts (thanks, daddies) and my input wasn't necessary. It reeks of social parenting, enforcement and naive privilege. The writers believe that if you preach hard enough, it will spill into reality. Daisy Edgar-Jones is neither ugly, weirdly or enticing enough to elaborate on an inconsistent sketch of a girl who is written to be all of those things. It's hypocritical. Paul Mescal is wasting his beautiful ass, nobody else matters and nothing happens. 05-May-2020
One Day at a Time (2017-)
I will always have affection for these people but I truly hope they find that thing this season lost. 04-May-2020
S4E3. E1 and E2 had me worried. It was loud and high strung in celebration of a second chance, feeling like a parody of itself. Episode 3 brought masturbation realness and hilarity, peak character delight and mama diva (Moreno) steal moments. The hardest I've laughed all year. 10-Apr-2020
All about relationships. Gracias. 03-Mar-2019
Motivating argument about the rules modern life coerces. Proficiently displayed, adoringly regarded and stamping the sitcom with the purpose TV forgot. 13-Feb-2019
Justina Machado is excellent and Rita Moreno embodies everything we miss about a Golden Girl. They've added superior daddy squish and the support is amiable reinforcement. Cheers. 01-Mar-2018
At first glance, you are inclined to think that this is an exploitation of a classic and respected series with token latino stereotypes. By the fourth episode you realize that it chose this community to depict because it needs updating the most and it feeds right into the original's claim. It's hard raising a latin family when the men are scarce and the women try to empower themselves at the cost of tradition. There are times you will be transported to all those arguments Lear presented between classic characters, fair to each but being persistent that the last word goes to the changing present. Justina Machado plays Penelope Alvarez with the same amount as distraught, parental overprotection and survivor's challenge that Bonnie Franklin's Ann Romano did. Rita Moreno's accent is old fashioned pastiche but she is a full character, beloved and is having a helluva time making us laugh. The kids aspire for realness instead of cute and Schneider is cute without the creep. 30-Jan-2017
Bad Education (2020)
The face of the righteous has a melting soul.
Hugh is big daddy, fulfilling a demanding feat. He teases us with his nice boy swag, making us feel comfortable, ripping layers and gnawing at his mentality. He floors like a man realizing his obsession is a sick heart aching for love of any kind.
Janney's gift is to steal acts, to be good or to be great. She is all.
Ray Romano is the grand daddy of kvetch, owning it with common sense and delivering it like a real person.
Geraldine Viswanathan displayed the smarts and determination the character needed.
The support was a menage of cultural brilliance.
Awkward, tricky and... bam!
(Society builds too much pressure in people.)
Married At First Sight (2014-)
Season Finale/Reunion. The doctor punched bluebeard, host daddy was a hormonal explosion and the show followed my script to the letter. I felt sorry for the last married couple on earth as they endured the horrors of others' relationships. Austin, particularly looked sick. The show is getting very close to hosting Fear Factor editions but is having fun on it's way there. 25-Apr-2020
S10. It's been tough relating or tolerating this season.
The experts are sinking into quack territory.
Mandy finally got rid of Bluebeard (Zach.) Hooray!
Taylor and Brandon. He's just stalling until the next bout of insecurity hits so he can explode. Run, girl.
Meka and Michael. A man doesn't change...he pretends. Run, girl.
Jessica and Austin. He will say I love you as soon as you forgive his first business travel discrepancy.
Katie and Derek. He's privileged and she's insecure. Eek.
Giving everyone a lie detector test before the show would give the experts some cred and avoid giving us another inadmissible season. 27-Mar-2020
S7E6. Naivete about the experiment is no longer viable because the mice have been coached by previous seasons. It's the show's sanity at test because the mice are the new experts that will mold the show through its entirety. As each season passes and we tire of them, the couples will most likely end up swapping with each other (see season 5, alpha Ashley Petty deserved alpha Cody Knapek and Anthony deserved for Danielle to put him on a diet.) The premise will continue to work because God's plan brought them together. The queens giving men sex, before and after catastrophe struck, was downright professional. 23-Oct-2019
Uh Oh. S6. Shawniece and Jephte made adorability joyous. May they enjoy an 88. 20-Oct-2019
S5E7. Fuck the experts, listen to the dogs! 05-Oct-2019
Experts encouraging couples to overlook red flags in a marriage because pretense defeats how a person feels. 21-Sep-2019
Bob Hearts Abishola (2019-)
Is it improper for me to say that I wish someone else would love Abishola? 31-Mar-2020
The leads do not align, Bob's family grates and reverse hate is not progressive. 08-Nov-2019
Exploring multi-cultural attitudes to life problems is interesting. The black characters sparkle but their counterparts appear like unwanted houseguests. I'm sure good writing can fix that. (I liked it.) 25-Sep-2019
The beautiful ones return in high style and peak bloom.
Fluidity is tunneled, pummeled and charged. The freedom to inherit all relationship prospects is an elite politic that facilitates mass hurt because the kids that invented it are incapable of successfully mastering it. They're human.
The parents do as Oprah taught them and heal most of their miracles' hemorrhage with gifts and money.
The beauties confusing the system to reclaim justice was resplendent.
The mystery continues and concludes, the ones are masters of bitchiness and heartbreak and the thread is reinforced nylon. Brava! 29-Mar-2020
The season was mapped mathematically and it hit every point. The actors are snug in their roles and stamping their characters. The drama makes you talk to yourself, the police work is thought out and everything looks delicious. Cool as fuck. 23-Sep-2019
They represent with no restraints and the teens are regarded with soul. The societal menace is heavier, coddling is out and the hurt is overwhelming. They are fighting a world adults complicated with wee survival skills. Beauty is diverse and it lingers because the writers keep tearing at it. 23-Nov-2018
Celebrating the heritage that creates a Mexican that all else take for granted. Choices are different for families that break their bones for the sustainability of another race. The fear arises when in order to subsist, the heritage dissipates... like plastic.. because its environmentally abusive in the land of the free. They're obnoxious, loud, tacky, sweet, lovable, squishy, touching, funny and bright. Gracias. 04-Mar-2020
Love Island (UK) (2015-)
Men have invented a new derogatory language to upset women. What now? We can't ban every word... or can we? Nobody mentioned french toast, its the best (any foreigner with sweet tasting d...) 22-Feb-2020
Contestants get paid to be inappropriate to strangers. 16-Feb-2020
I misinterpreted its existence. We are judging cave dwellers hooking up in a modern habitat. Skinny jeans, man pillows, wrangling, snogging, heart rips, musical accents and an errattic ear...that's entertainment. It's a braincation. 16-Feb-2020
Boring in any language. 25-Aug-2019
Safe Harbour (2018-)
Would you save a life if you think it puts you in jeopardy? It gripped and swerved evenly between the privileged and the do goodness, accentuating all the flaws, the heart and the life balancing we all endure. Each wields power that the new world has entitled them to but misconception, anxiety and unburdening (through violence) keep manifesting the elephant in the room...stereotyping to get a point across or to do more harm...to run away from it for as long as the effect is not needed.
It loses two moons because it ended with everyone getting a car and it feels the threat was for naught. The ending is a whimper. Life has consequences. 08-Feb-2020
Witcher, The (2019-)
Daddy is something else but it was the ladies that kept me glued. 18-Jan-2020
Of course, I'm disquieted by the froggish whisper of the Witcher but he delivers comitted action moves and steady alpha charisma. Interspersed characterization maintains the show's freshness. (Is it part of its mythology that all pretty twinks get killed?) 15-Jan-2020