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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Comic Book'

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Sonic The Hedgehog (2020) Arf

James Marsden had chemistry with no one. Tika Sumpter couldn't find it. There was no youth in Sonic's voice. Jim Carrey walked a tightrope of Riddler madness and The Truman Show control. I wished he had lost control but I also dreaded it. It's personal because I spent years buying new consoles just so I could play that little blue fucker. (They were awesome.) More ringtones and musical nods from the games would have stirred gleeful memories but the film provides what the games couldn't... an easy time. 07-Oct-2020

Tags: 2020s, Action, Action Fun, Camp, Comedy, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Director Movement, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Funny, Hot Swatch, Sentimental, Suspense, Sweet, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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07-Oct-2020


Beyond White Space (2018) Whimper

The inclination to watch was always interrupted by its gaming inspired poster. It looked like something you would play not watch. Obviously, it's description and my boredom tuned us in.

After decimating earth the next boost for humanity is to fuck up space. Away we go with pirates, thieves, anarchists, loveless, lawless and hopeless. Fun fact: I did not know space had crabs and no gays. The monsters are CGI identified on a two sided coin. The dialogue is full of those chemicals we don't want on our meat, the actors eating corn would have had the same effect and the director/editor stumbled by premeditating everything about to occur. The action sequences are as inspired as a preview before a game that never starts. 28-Aug-2020

Tags: Accidental Watch, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Comic Book, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Dialogue Lament, Drama, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Predictable, Preposterous, Sap, SciFi, Tacky, Timid, Vague

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28-Aug-2020


John Wick 3 (2019) Woof

Even after siphoning pleasure from the first two I was hesitant to invest in a third. I expected more ugly pup murder vengeance but it was one of the best video games I ever played. Angelica Huston was unrecognizable but still biting. Halle Berry finally delivered dog munching kickass. The horses, the cycles, the players, the stunts, the work. It was exhilarating. It's creation negates all improbability. Daddy cool K represents our aggressions and their release. Flush. 17-Aug-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Action Fun, Action Stomper, Big, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Director's Art, Drama, Elegance, Enthusiastic, Funny, Good Acting, Hot Swatch, Kool Effects, Mean Spirited, Music Swings, Over the Top, Political Satire, Preposterous, Revenge, Star Watt, Suspense, Thriller, Tough, Twisty, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tight

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17-Aug-2020


Power Rangers (2017) Whimper

Adding angst and brood to the kid franchise is choking. The teens have troublesome history and are enrapt in familial and environmental chains. Gaining the power of a god will rehabilitate them. Lead boy steals Zac Efron's eyes, Bryan Cranston is imprisoned on a wall when daddy's veracity is letting loose and the most interesting thing Rita (the villain) did was eat a donut. Destruction is a friend but sap is not. 31-Jul-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Comic Book, Conspiracy Theory, Daddy Squish, Director Insanity, Fantasy, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Predictable, Repetitive, SciFi, Silly, Star Watt, Timid, Twinkie, Weird, Wit Crack

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31-Jul-2020


Old Guard, The (2020) Whimper

PC vampires arrive in woke world. They no longer bite but still have the ability to suck.

Charlize Theron squelches her sexuality to deliver macho posturing and adds no strength to female action fabulosity. A woman who obscures her sexuality is depriving the act of confidence and beauty. She was so serious and miserable.

The gays were cute for the moments they accessorized but the corn deep throated them.

The superpowers are not enviable and is a filmic excuse to watch people bleed out.

The "big bads" couldn't scare a bird away.

The story is refried beans with lesser ingredients and the action came straight out the can. 14-Jul-2020

Tags: 2020s, Action, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Comic Book, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Drama, False Action, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Manipulation, Over the Top, Preachy, Predictable, Retread, Silly, Tedium, Timid, Unenthusiastic

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14-Jul-2020


Mask, The (1994) Woof

A movie that succeeds in spite of its inanity. The effects still impress. Jim Carrey's comedic chaos mimic and Cameron Diaz' unflinching bombshell elevate it. 02-Jul-2020

Tags: 1990s, Action Fun, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Comic Book, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Funny, Good Acting, Kool Effects, Magnetism, Music Swings, Over the Top, Romance, Silly, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ w/Possibilities

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02-Jul-2020


Birds of Prey (2020) Bites

Robbie is missing the lilt and the energy that would whip Harley Quinn into a showpiece. The women in charge plaster the screen with cartoon abandon, avoid psychoanalyzing themselves and express no vulnerability that would compel a unique perspective. The film lacks a heart. It's like a man directed it. 13-Jun-2020

Tags: 2020s, Action Stomper, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cold, Comic Book, Dialogue Lament, Director Insanity, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Fantasy, Fatigue, Macho Posing, Mean Spirited, Musical Bombast, Oncer, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Revenge, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Timid, Too Long, Weird

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14-Jun-2020


Grave Of The Vampire (1972) Whimper

Silliness about a resurrected vamp raping a mod chick that dies delivering his baby. The baby ages into a superhero hunk with little gift of gab and limited supernatural powers. The fair lady hired to scream, couldn't. Fast forward to the fight scene which has Thor mashing a tired Michael Morbius with no effects and generating loads of laughs. 24-Mar-2020

Tags: 1970s, Accidental Watch, Art Devoid, Cold, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fantasy, Funny, Sort of, Horror, Hot Swatch, Inactivity, Political Satire, Preposterous, Silly, Tedium, Timid, Weird

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24-Mar-2020


I Kill Giants (2017) Whimper

She kills giants and she's not afraid of them but then proceeds to quiver and weep at the thought. Having little girls spew superhero corn is cringey and embarrassingly hilarious. The girl on girl was tender but the titular was a smoky abstract. I was a bit confused by the giants. Why kill something that hands such good life advice upon victory or is that the point? Are they fortune cookies? 09-Mar-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Action, Camp, Comic Book, Crapfun, Fantasy, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Gay Swatch, Mystery, Preposterous, Sweet, Timid, Writ w/Possibilities

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09-Mar-2020


Freaks (2018) Arf

It doesn't punctuate the title but the surroundings are trapped shut, baby bubble is dramatically shoved, pulled and pie faced into reality and the effects remind you without shaking you. It's a film that passes but makes us feel like we stumbled upon a midseason finale cliffhanger. 05-Mar-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Baby Wrecks, Chemistry, Comic Book, Conspiracy Theory, Director's Slice, Drama, Funny, Mat, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Political, Scary, Sentimental, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet, Weird, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

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05-Mar-2020


Pokemon: Detective Pikachu (2019) Arf

I expected Pikachu to talk a lot squeakier but it's a wholesome retelling that thrills when the Pokemons come to life. 21-Feb-2020

Tags: 2010s, Adorable, Comedy, Comic Book, Drama, Fantasy, Funny, Kool Effects, Sentimental, Writ w/Possibilities

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21-Feb-2020


Magic (1978) Woof

It's a high art profile of a Batman villain directed by Friday The Thirteenth. Margret brings her heroine to life by embodying the excited frustration of her realistic innocence for magic. Her character is underwritten and suffers from "who cares" but she was in it. Hopkins is our favorite crazy man whose practice and natural talent always have a way of invading its space. It is not a clean performance. He hits as many times as he bounces but what he lands is electric. A film, that in time, might grow into something. 11-Jan-2020

Tags: 1970s, Chemistry, Comic Book, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Funny, Good Acting, Horror, Hot Swatch, Music Swings, Mystery, Over the Top, Silly, Star Watt, Suspense, Weird, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

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11-Jan-2020


Bumblebee (2018) Whimper

We watch for the shiny new tech (even if it appears unfinished.) 09-Jan-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Comic Book, Corn, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, SciFi, Shrill Act, Silly, Stink Wigs, Timid, Writer Humiliation

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09-Jan-2020


Hellboy (2019) Arf

Hellish Arthurian legend. It couldn't hit the masses because it keeps its characters and premise grotesque and blood-soaked. David Harbour conveys the title monster but his unappealing design lends him no superhero charisma. Cult status may grant its futility and relentlessness, crap fun. 18-Dec-2019

Tags: 2010s, Action, Action Stomper, Brutal, Camp, Comic Book, Crapfun, Cultish, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Horror, Kool Effects, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Political Satire, Porn Violence, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Tough, Ugly Art

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18-Dec-2019


Satan Met A Lady (1936) Arf

They hired accomplished actors to line read with little expression except snide, stupid or cute. The characters are comic strip flat. 04-Dec-2019

Tags: 1930s, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Comic Book, Crime Drama, Daddy Squish, Enthusiastic, Fatigue, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Over the Top, Silly, Star Watt, Weird, Wit Crack

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04-Dec-2019




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