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Movies Posts Tagged as 'By the Numbers'

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Green Room (2015) Whimper

Band of vagabonds get punished by nazis for playing crappy rock or because they witnessed a crime. Sir Patrick Stewart was hired to class up the film and the "n" word. Anton Yelchin's heroism is a John Connor (Terminator) facsimile with substandard realization. The film lost me as soon as the punk picks up his phone to call the police for a kill that wasn't directed at him. What is the purpose of nazis if there is no racial conflict? (They don't need the props.) They were dim and disoriented and anything but scary. It stalls, it repeats, it celebrates and I believed very little of it. 28-Mar-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Chemistry, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director Insanity, Drama, Fatigue, Good Acting, Gore, Horror, Hot Swatch, Macho Posing, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Star Watt, Weird

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28-Mar-2020


All Of Me (1984) Whimper

Instead of a body switch Mr. Reiner chose partial possession which is one of the most improbable storylines attempted ever. We want no change in anything but the story. The pros (Martin and Tomlin) don't embarrass easily because it makes sense that great comedy training includes stupidity. Martin freights most of it and freewheels in an agitated state that unnerves us but never hinders us from lapping up his star charm. Lily didn't feel like an equal because she was stuck in a mirror for most of it but her adorable cheekiness and one liners hit. The dance was still cute. 25-Mar-2020

Tags: 1980s, Art Devoid, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Drama, Elegance, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Fatigue, Funny, Good Acting, Magnetism, Music Swings, Over the Top, Preposterous, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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25-Mar-2020


Deadcon (2019) Bites

A con for the social sprinters, trifling and influencers. It takes forever to kill one and when they do its not enough. Solid acting keeps you tuned. 11-Mar-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Chemistry, Cold, Fatigue, Good Acting, Horror, Over the Top, Preposterous, Relationships, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly

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11-Mar-2020


Lion King, The (2019) Arf

Its paced like a cartoon which kills the organic emotional impact because it seems rushed.

The score swelled and stomped on all the sentiments the story was setting. It's hard to feel something when it's already been decided for you.

The baby voices were stronger than their mature counterparts.

The soundtrack sparkled with new modulations.

It's a retread with no originality injected... wrapped in a gorgeous package. 29-Feb-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, By the Numbers, Cold, Comedy, Director's Touch, Drama, Fatigue, Musical, Musical Bombast, Repetitive, Sap, Star Watt

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29-Feb-2020


Recall, The (2017) Bites

Wesley Snipes' character makes no sense and serves little purpose except to initiate coincidental saves. The aliens are underwhelming compared to its rip counterparts. The only injection of interest occurs at end where the film should have started. 22-Feb-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, By the Numbers, Camp, Conspiracy Theory, Drama, False Action, Fatigue, Grating, Horror, Hot Swatch, Preposterous, Silly, Star Watt, Timid, Vague

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22-Feb-2020


Selfie From Hell (2018) Bites

I would have jumped, had reason backed it up. 13-Feb-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, By the Numbers, Camp, Conspiracy Theory, Creepy, Drama, Fatigue, Horror, Hot Swatch, Indecipherable, Over the Top, Political, Preposterous, Scare Obvious, Silly, Tedium, Timid

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13-Feb-2020


Godzilla: King Of The Monsters (2019) Whimper

A blanched all-star siphon it's heart but the smoked monsters have art comic book flair. Blur the actors and fine-tune the monsters. 13-Feb-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Bad Acting, By the Numbers, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Fantasy, Fatigue, Musical Bombast, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Silly, Star Watt, Timid

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13-Feb-2020


Mom and Dad (2018) Whimper

Moms and dads awaken from stress to obliterate what causes them the most burden...kids. The film dares to ponder how society manipulates adults into creating life that overshadows their own but gets cold feet trying to decipher it. Nicolas Cage unleashes grand psycho qualities that the director reins in for fear of buffoonery (?) That's a shame. 08-Feb-2020

Tags: 2020s, By the Numbers, Camp, Chemistry, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Horror, Indecipherable, Over the Top, Political Satire, Star Watt, Suspense, Timid, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

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08-Feb-2020


Whirlwind (2007) Whimper

The men are pulled right out of the gay bible and are shot up close to hide background restrictions. The cast was diverse and capable. Friends and lovers are infiltrated and defrocked by a vindictive serial fucker. It should have been fun but the soup was bland. They spent a sizable amount of time talking about big dick and no time exposing it. 04-Feb-2020

Tags: 2000s, By the Numbers, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Enthusiastic, Funny, Gay, Hot Swatch, Life, Predictable, Sentimental, Tacky, Timid, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

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04-Feb-2020


Midnight Movie: The Killer Cut (2008) Whimper

In order for a viewer to digest mumbo jumbo we need to be privy to the rules. The film concocts it and we decide if it is within the realm of possibility so we can view the art piece with tolerance. No rules were established and the filmmaker refused to reserve a coherent explanation. It was remastered to look sharper but not sound brighter. 03-Feb-2020

Tags: 2000s, 2020s, Art Devoid, By the Numbers, Camp, Corn, Director Slouch, Fatigue, Indecipherable, Musical Bombast, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Scare Obvious, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Timid, Vague, Weird

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03-Feb-2020


Saturn 5 (1980) Bites

It literally reads, even in space, the Goldigger gets what she wants. The age difference is astronomical which sends charisma out the window. It probably would have played better with a spouse of equal experience. Farrah hadn't received her acting wings yet but she comes to life when she's experiencing pain (screaming, crying and panicking.) The robot is unfinished and ridiculous, the sets are TV comparable and the idea is no longer beneficial. 24-Jan-2020

Tags: 1980s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Music Swings, Preposterous, SciFi, Unenthusiastic, Weird, Writer Humiliation

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24-Jan-2020


Meet Wally Sparks (1997) Whimper

Illogical silliness for a ferocious one liner. The supporting personalities are TV staples flexing their muscles to bozo comedy. Poor things. 19-Jan-2020

Tags: 1990s, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Cold, Comedy, Corn, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preposterous, Sap, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Weird, Wit Crack

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19-Jan-2020


Bumblebee (2018) Whimper

We watch for the shiny new tech (even if it appears unfinished.) 09-Jan-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Comic Book, Corn, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, SciFi, Shrill Act, Silly, Stink Wigs, Timid, Writer Humiliation

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09-Jan-2020


Invaders From Mars (1986) Bites

Tobe and company add too much silliness to the story, the aliens look like ugly toys you win for free and the only alien needed was underutilized (Louise Fletcher.) She knows scary. 31-Dec-2019

Tags: 1980s, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Conspiracy Theory, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Fatigue, Over the Top, Political Satire, Predictable, Remake, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Timid, TV-like, Weird

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31-Dec-2019


Postcards From London (2018) Whimper

Whores assessing that man needs art to turn on. It's an excuse for filmic art to celebrate human art (Harris Dickinson) but it doesn't know how. 03-Jan-2020

Tags: 2010s, By the Numbers, Disappointment, Drama, Fatigue, Gay, Hot Swatch, Shrill Act, Silly, Timid, Unenthusiastic, Vague

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26-Dec-2019




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