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All Posts Tagged as 'Conspiracy Theory'

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Married At First Sight (2014-)  Woof

The mermaid is a pisser and the bird continues to flap involuntarily and very quietly.

The bangers and their respective families are competing to weird us out.

If Brett's face and body moved according to the sound of his voice, I'd believe everything he says.

Woody's mask is hiding the devil inside. 06-Aug-2020
The show has outlined relations for the future.

What a man thinks when he meets a prospective woman:

"Can I fuck her?"

"Will she fuck me?"

"Opinion chatter?"

"She does."

"Business travel!"

Amelia & Bennett. The theory bangers. When the bride spoke with groom besties I envisioned a spontaneous and loving future group dinner. Bennett is a vegan and likes female hairy armpit. I hope she's crispy.

Amani & Woody. His Sammy persona tears. Too much spunk. I thought Amani daddies were a gay couple. Brute gave that boy a death grip. Amani swung her umbrella and his with ease and joy.

Olivia & Brett. He has Dracula Wives for besties and he lost the mojo to an unzip.

Christina & Henry. The shallow mermaid and that bird she's always hanging around with. It's a show for her to put on and him to swallow. Henry's father proclaimed himself eligible for PFLAG by stating that his son is being the sissy boy the present needs him to be. The rest of the family outed him further during their toasts. They pick on everyone. She'll get used to it.

Karen & Miles. Thunder and lightning. What he wants from marriage is a family to lead. When she made him rub her feet he felt so last century. 29-Jul-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Emasculating, Funny, Gay Swatch, Home Improvement, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Twisty, Variety, Warbly, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

Filed under: TV

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06-Aug-2020


Sea Fever (2019) Woof

Marine Biology student with no social graces gets punished. She has to spend a week on a fishing boat with strangers and foreigners to soothe her mind of robotic intelligence.

Hermoine Corfield plays it clumsy and rough. She adapts to the idea that intelligence needs to be shared, as well as acquired to benefit anyone.

Connie Nielsen raises plenty of steam as a female captain at her wits end with a fucking husband who's constantly showing her up.

Olwen Fouere smashed the boat. Dougray Scott's macho fragility grants him exclusivity to daddy home care package status. Ardalan Esmaili is smart slippery daddy squish.

There are no heroes, the choices are sound, the parasite creeps and the subtlety of the menace illuminates the thought. Well done, Neasa Hardiman (director.) 01-Aug-2020

Tags: Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Funny, Sort of, Good Acting, Gory, Horror, Music Swings, Mystery, Political, Scary, SciFi, Sentimental, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Words Spoke, Writ Tight

Filed under: Movies

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01-Aug-2020


Power Rangers (2017) Whimper

Adding angst and brood to the kid franchise is choking. The teens have troublesome history and are enrapt in familial and environmental chains. Gaining the power of a god will rehabilitate them. Lead boy steals Zac Efron's eyes, Bryan Cranston is imprisoned on a wall when daddy's veracity is letting loose and the most interesting thing Rita (the villain) did was eat a donut. Destruction is a friend but sap is not. 31-Jul-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Comic Book, Conspiracy Theory, Daddy Squish, Director Insanity, Fantasy, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Predictable, Repetitive, SciFi, Silly, Star Watt, Timid, Twinkie, Weird, Wit Crack

Filed under: Movies

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31-Jul-2020


Vivarium (2019) Whimper

Bubble couple are misled into a hellish suburban child rearing nightmare after house shopping.The setting is rife with panic and exasperation which neither characters or the presentation take advantage of. The characters don't react like real people and the story wants no resolution. Phones don't exist, no one attempts to test the gadgets in the house, time passes and the majors look the same, young "Sheldon" is triumphantly maddening, Eisenberg spends too much time digging and Poots rimming. It's about nothing. 26-Jul-2020

Tags: 2010s, By the Numbers, Cold, Conspiracy Theory, Director Slouch, Drama, Fatigue, Good Idea, Grating, Horror, Mystery, Preposterous, Relationships, Repetitive, Silly, Stupid Funny, Suspense, Too Long, Unenthusiastic, Vague, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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26-Jul-2020


Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (1978) Howl

Daddy "pod people" proficiency. I can't imagine a better cast to deliver a concrete, spooky conspiracy. It turns the brain on and our survival mode kicks in as the repetitive blankness coerces the free thinker to scream in frustration. 16-Jul-2020

Tags: 1970s, Best in Sci-Fi, Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Decent FX, Director's Art, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fresh, Good Acting, Magnetism, Music Swings, Mystery, Political Satire, Relationships, Scary, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tight, Writer's Peak

Filed under: Movies

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16-Jul-2020


Color Of Space, The (2019) Arf

Meteor lands on bubble family property and affects change. Nic is allowed full psycho mode but the word and the psychology betray him. One minute he's canoodling with the wife and the next he is lacerating his teenage daughter like there's a history of childhood molestation. There is no consistency of character. All sexual innuendos and racial discrepancies are applied to animals. Thank God. There is a glimmer of an invasion but it's mostly about the effect. Fuck that. I want to see aliens. 14-Jul-2020

Tags: 2010s, Camp, Conspiracy Theory, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Music Swings, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Silly, Star Watt, Suspense, Timid, Vague, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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14-Jul-2020


Quake, The (2018) Arf

Papa is an obsessed conspiracy theorist and mama is comatose. The action shivers but there is only so much disaster this family/us can take. 10-Jul-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, By the Numbers, Conspiracy Theory, Director's Touch, Drama, Foreign, Over the Top, Relationships, Repetitive, Sentimental, Sequel, Suspense

Filed under: Movies

Permalink

10-Jul-2020


Salt And Pepper (1968) Bites

They had the etiquette to name Sammy Davis Jr., Salt and Peter Lawson, Pepper but the film scourges the earth with inappropriateness. It's a spin-off of Rat Pack mentality, with loss of cool, unbelievable politics and ridiculous antics. The buddies have built-in chemistry but the premise is bonkers. 29-Jun-2020

Tags: 1960s, Art Devoid, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Conspiracy Theory, Director Insanity, Enthusiastic, False Action, Inappropriate, Loud, Macho Posing, Mystery, Over the Top, Political Satire, Preposterous, Star Watt, Wit Crack

Filed under: Movies

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29-Jun-2020


Siren (2018-) Woof

The sea bursts with trans merms, foreign landers and common ground.

The throuple endangers itself for the esteem of want and need.

Eline Powell stamped her signature on otherworldly and frightening beauty.

An interracial cast that realistically blends.

The mythology holes don't stop me from digging it.

The aqua war delivered TV best.

The characters can't stop me from caring for it.

Bye.

 26-Jun-2020
Women own the water that men feed from.

It's an analogy for many things but the message is to respect all life.

Beautiful colors of the universe are united to show us their TV Q.

The daddies are pretty big things, rescuing respectfully and allowing the women, heroism.

The throuple has me banging my head. It's hot, unique, eek and curious.

The mythology is well done, the effects don't suck and my favorite merman is chocolate. 23-Jun-2020
S1E3. I'm getting Kyle XY jitters along with Carrie mermaid spooks. It takes us away from the muck and asks that we be entertained. 16-Jun-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Action, Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Creepy, Director's Touch, Drama, From Another Planet, Fun, Hot Swatch, Relationships, Scary, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet Dick Energy, Tough, Writ Tight

Filed under: TV

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26-Jun-2020


Assimilate (2019) Bites

Misunderstanding the mythology of the "pod people" and mishandling how to apply it to this generation. They twinkled it, legitimized it, repeated it and fudged it.

Ideas:

Social Media is our pod and we are its people.

It arrives from a dead planet. An alien-camouflaging organism that can only do so, temporarily with the environment. It needs a human to survive. I know, I know... make Mexicans immune! You want to scare us, don't you? 20-Jun-2020

Tags: 2010s, Bad Acting, Camp, Conspiracy Theory, Corn, Director Slouch, Drama, Ear Prick, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Grating, Horror, Mystery, Over the Top, Predictable, Remake, SciFi, Silly, Timid

Filed under: Movies

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20-Jun-2020


Goldfinch, The (2019) Whimper

Boy suffers the loss of his mom, who dies in an explosion, but gains a piece of priceless art. Sarah Paulson has a moment as a bimbo and Nic adds an elegant presence to an adoptive mom but the characters have no foundation for any actor to stem from. The boy, in particular, acts as the scene needs, not as his character would. Ansel achieves a spark because he's trying to understand it as much as we are. It's a hard sell because the mystery doesn't amount to a life altering choice, it just is. A sweet sentiment with absolutely no sugar. 26-May-2020

Tags: 2010s, By the Numbers, Chemistry, Cold, Conspiracy Theory, Director Slouch, Drama, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Inactivity, Mystery, Silly, Star Watt, Tedium, Too Long, Unenthusiastic, Vague, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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26-May-2020


Humanoids From The Deep (1980) Arf

Cis sea monsters killing dogs, children and men so they can rape the women. It's pure schlock, WTF and astounding they pulled it off. I was less hesitant to watch because it was helmed by a woman. A woman, Barbara Peeters, would never exploit it. She handles her task, dons a penis cap for the shots and switches to thinking emotion about circumstances. She navigated like a pro. The fight scenes turned out hilarious but the racism, kills and rapes were sharp. All sexes, breeds and races shared the heroism.

(What were these people eating then? Their hair looked terrific.) 08-May-2020

Tags: 1980s, Action Stomper, Camp, Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Crapfun, Cultish, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Art, Drama, Enthusiastic, Funny, Gory, Horror, Hot Swatch, Magnetism, Music Swings, Political Satire, Rapey, Scary, SciFi, Star Watt, Tacky, Tough, Words Spoke, Writ Tight

Filed under: Movies

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08-May-2020


Flu (2013) Woof

This is the conclusion to all the movie pandemics. The easy saves were cliche but the tough stuff was visionary. The sweety darling in danger may be repetitive, but she's so cute. The error asides don't matter if the director envisions a whole. The cure for the virus and the safety of the world is to kill all of the infected. Disaster movie, indeed. 17-Apr-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Action Stomper, Adorable, Baby Wrecks, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Conspiracy Theory, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Art, Drama, Enthusiastic, Foreign, Funny, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Horror, Hot Swatch, Kool Effects, Music Swings, Political, Relationships, Sentimental, Silly, Suspense, Sweet, Words Spoke, Writ Tight

Filed under: Movies

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17-Apr-2020


Dead Kids (Strange Behavior) - (1981) Arf

Controlling kids for kills. Bursting with ideas that the master had no idea how to cohesively cobble together. The kills are interesting because they are clumsy like real life. Fiona Lewis' donut bun steals the whole thing. 18-Mar-2020

Tags: 1980s, Accidental Watch, Conspiracy Theory, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Gore, Horror, Mystery, Political Satire, Revenge, SciFi, Star Watt, Suspense, Tacky, Weird, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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18-Mar-2020


Knives Out (2019) Arf

Whodunnits don't need explanation. A fresh appeal for a chess match. Everything with Plummer spun magnificently but Craig jacked Spacey's southern flourish with little success. The support were ready but remained pawns in a game. They didn't flesh out. The unraveling was dry and predictable but the mystery qualified. 08-Mar-2020

Tags: 2010s, Bad Acting, Camp, Comedy, Conspiracy Theory, Director's Touch, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fatigue, Good Acting, Grating, Inspired, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Oncer, Political Satire, Predictable, Silly, Star Watt, Tedium, Timid, TV-like, Twisty, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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08-Mar-2020




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