I was not familiar with Nosferatu folklore. Couldn't finish the silent film because the romanticism got lost when they made Dracula a hideous monster. The reason Count can appear human is because he's a metaphor for the monsters living inside of us. Ugly things are not tempting or worth filming. The original movie caused a stir for being a direct knock-off of Dracula. They were supposed to burn every copy but some assholes from the future salvaged them. Having to learn new character names fucked with my memorization. Renfield has always irritated me. Every iteration of him is nasty and nuts. Maybe a female Renfield would benefit the mythology. She can crush on the Count, serve him, become jealous and overprotective esp. when he meets Mina or Lucy or whatever name changes already existed. I'd make her a witch. The mood and an obsession created a shadow atmosphere with no soul or action to back it up. Why did they make Lilly Rose look like that? She looked ready to churn butter. Adding more mumbo jumbo destroyed what the original carefully invented. The added myths are cheats with no thought process. The director diluted hunky man hotness. My ears started ringing when I heard Skarsgard's accent. Why was he speaking so slow? To fill space? Skarsgard is all monster and no personality. Covering aspects of what makes an actor shine is blasphemous. It could have been Alexa voicing it because I never felt Skarsgard's presence. He buried himself inside the character. The foretelling was exhausting. Why tell us what's going to happen next? Be quiet and show us. The shadows in Eggers art overlapped the humans creating them. 01-Jul-2025

A film that didn't take advantage of all its possibilities. Though songs that didn't suck were beautifully sung the characters were flat like paper. An elimination of half the songs would have opened space to delve into Snow White and the Queen's relationship. I would have changed fairest and explored kingdom popularity. Gadot's character is doomed the moment the narrator emphasized how evil she was. She was misdirected and stifled when her natural accent would have added mystery to her persona. It also would have freed Gadot. The evil was basic and child's play. My favorite scene from the classic animation was the run through the forest. The 3D effect was mind tripping. A live recreation would have added much needed magic. If you're going to CGI the dwarves why make them ugly? They missed out on likeness and adorability. I would have nixed the "merry men" and concentrated on the ladies, dwarves and huntsman. She could've fallen in love with the huntsman instead of a merry man. Zegler comes alive when she sings but is immobile in expression. She's so intent on conveying a message instead of embodying a legend that she lends her character nothing. The climax disappoints because it doesn't really have one. It goes out with a whimper. I came up with at least 5 grand finales, including having the huntsman kill the Queen with an acquired weapon that is magical because she is invulnerable to everything else. The hope for greatness ballooned and imploded and they didn't know how to put the pieces back together. 29-Jun-2025

I tried playing this game and became frustrated with all the things I had to build. Why would I want to build ugly shit? I hated it. Hats off to Momoa for choosing the loser role. Black brought the energy but not the charisma. The children looked dirty like the adults so they didn't register. I wanted to yank Momoa's stupid wig off. TG they hired some minorities to qualify for Oscars. Always silly, sometimes funny with no substantial skills taught to kids. 23-Jun-2025

The only thing that banged was McAvoy's body. It was grade A daddy meat. His villain was a parody of elements. The outline kept to its namesake. There were no surprises, leaps or bounds. It frustrated more than it scared, Americans are not "that" nice, women are less, no man sleeps with baby girl and gets away with it. The bunny dependency was a cheat. "Fuck bunny! Do you wanna die?!!!!" Home we go. 13-Apr-2025

No voice actor accomplished the spirit of the characters they were portraying and no artist brought forth the actors' sensibilities. Timon and Pumba didn't coagulate and were kind of icky. Being younger does not excuse Mufasa's studious voice. What college did he go to? There was no boom in his voice at all. Rafiki's accent was diluted which killed his character's strength and suppressed his charisma. Where was Scar's gay accent? The songs retracted more than they bounced, the animation creeped more than it amazed, and the story was blasphemous and weak. All this fuss over a lioness when Scar's real crush should have been Mufasa. The brother song was so inept that it made me furious every time they said brother. The bottom of the barrel. 11-Apr-2025

Well acted characters that didn't initiate much sympathy. The hooker is content in her work, minds her own business, learned nothing about men or how things work. The heroine's gullibility was exasperating. Every time a character was introduced to another was mostly awkward. The only character that conveyed inner thoughts was Igor. Once elements of The Hangover commenced the ridiculousness didn't stop. Silly hijinks and mobster blunders. Dreams dashed by love and parents. Spoiled brats and power images. Anything will do when the choices are none. Certain things don't need to have a point to hit a nerve but this one was spin cycling. I couldn't catch a word. 18-Mar-2025

Dwayne Johnson's voice calmed me down, Scherzinger can belt one out, the songs weren't Nickelodeon worthy, the adventure is inanity that applied no sense and didn't teach the kids anything. Why do we always look to the past to celebrate a culture? In reality they would have cooked Pua at the first celebratory feast. The spiritualization represented is not feasible. It's full of nonsensical magic and bullshit. Disney's animated films have become babysitters for children and nap time for adults. The film takes cinema out of the equation. 17-Mar-2025

It's more of an exercise than it is an accomplishment. I stayed tuned because the man who cracks dicks with his ass is charming as fuck. None of the support matches him. The symbiotes' history did not have enough humanity to make me care. The action sequences depended heavily on coincidence. The chemistry between Mrs. Chen and Mr. Hardy was wasted. The threat was so surreal that it became mute. I stayed to memorize Hardy's butt but he didn't turn around much. 01-Mar-2025

A movie where silence is golden only resonates with "good face" actors. Lupita is characterized as an unpleasant doom manipulator. The cat that doesn't meow really pissed me off. By making the cat mute they missed out on fresh ideas and unforgettable scenes. Hounsou was relegated to extra. The action repeats but it doesn't refresh. More monster exposition would have added coherence and sustainability. What is their backstory? What happened to the crying babies? Deaf people who can talk? The rules of the game were acknowledged rather swiftly and the setups were obvious and corny. Pizza, really? 08-Jan-2025

The A.I. was too sparkly and bubbly. Action was stagnant. I had to look up the actors names to remember who was in it, even though I just watched it. The tension it built should have burst the story into the air but it got stenched with TV type trite that makes a farting sound. 30-Nov-2024

The child did extraordinary things, quoted words not associated with children and plagiarized previous strokes. The last minute saves were so expected that emotional attachment got lost. Melissa Barrera gave Faith from Buffy vibes. Dan Stevens was blank. The first surprise is like everything before it. Once the cat is out of the bag the movie falls into WB TV status. Yes, it was a surprise but a sucky one. 28-Nov-2024

They made us wait forever to see the man with the sculpted buns, they mimicked the mythology instead of enacting it, the lack of words made it easier to hide but hard to understand. They took a sample of what often occurs with a man beast and concocted a film. Samples can't describe the complete picture. It moves slow, the child is soulless, the wife doesn't matter, and daddy is one-note. Daddy is goofy happy and abusively angry. I recommend that Kit and his buns of stone make a better movie elsewhere. 31-Oct-2024

In order for the premise to thrive, the guests must shine. The little girl was inspired by the Scary movie franchise. The host had the most but was overshadowed by ponderous material. Support did not attempt to break a stereotypical shell to elicit empathy or further their characters. It didn't intrigue me, convince me or frighten me. (My mother wins most awesomemest possession of a devil in realtime.) It's almost impossible to recreate magic that only happens once in a lifetime. 22-Oct-2024

Food can be an orgasmic delight or a fatal mistake. The film runs with it but keeps making U-turns to nonsensical scares. The premise felt fresh but lazy. I thought up cooler things to do with food to scare besides making it icky. Ms. DeBose restrained herself esp. her face. Her close-ups didn't convey much because her face was speaking a foreign tongue. I had no idea what she was thinking. Once again, the bombardment of one subject doesn't match the progression of the film. The script should never read like a resume. It shouldn't end like one either. Isn't the last line about hobbies and likes? 09-Oct-2024

X-corist, Amyty and Geist are the main ingredients that make up this film. It's three interwoven white stories rewritten for black people. Andra Day portrayed a monster with minimal happy days. She was constantly confrontational, inconsistent and influenced. If it weren't for dames Monique and Close, I would have left. I don't think anybody can play an old hillbilly slut better than Glenn. Evil Glenn was appetizing and distinguished. Monique created a believable character from top to bottom and didn't fidget. A successful sequel to The Exorcist might have consisted of observing Regan's memories returning and their dire effects. Regan: Pazuzu Returns! 04-Sep-2024