All Posts Tagged as 'Over the Top'
Welcome to Errattic! We encourage you to customize the type of information you see here by clicking the Preferences link on the top of this page.
Golden Bachelor, The (2023)

Fuckboy! 01-Dec-2023
Daddy couldn't help himself from trying the new luggage he won on Let's Make A Deal. He showed Leslie how wires helped him move around the house and bestowed on Theresa, only sexual regard. 20-Nov-2023
Daddy gold was forced to walk and run, though I believe the run was CGI'd. Gerry was very vague when discussing how he felt about Theresa to her grandchildren and daughter. When he eye fucked Theresa's daughter she reacted like she liked it. I'm sure she wasn't listening to anything he was saying because he was saying that he wasn't in love with her mother. Either he let the cat out of the bag or he's a better actor than I thought. I ponder why Gerry is called Gary when it should be Jerry. 03-Nov-2023
Palmer didn't eyefuck anybody because he wasn't alone with them. Oh well, there's still paradise. Is the show on realtime? Do they walkie talkie what the public thinks to the producers? They made daddy walk. He only walked a few steps but every time he asked to walk a girl out he was holding on to them for dear life. When he opened the car door for a dumped, the producers rigged his suit jacket to hold him up. Good wire work. If talking about your ex on a first date is rude, why does it get a pass in old age? We found out that daddy is not made of gold, he bruises whenever a woman touches him. Maybe, she's made of fire. 27-Oct-2023
What pickle ball means: Age deteriorates the quality of the vegetable, but rarely causes them to actually become unsafe for consumption IMO. Pickling is used to preserve foods and in the environment of brine, they last pretty well forever. That said, the texture and flavorings are going to get funky after a couple of years. 20-Oct-2023
Whilst the ladies were slapping old man's balls our daddy gold was sitting. When he appeared on an ATV he sat throughout. He made out with any lips that came towards him, sitting down. The rose ceremony took much longer because daddy had to sit after every rose. He pretended to be a gentleman but we know the handicapped woman helped him walk out. That lady whose daughter was getting married as she was clapping balls didn't give two shits. Mother is not a title but an action. I'm sure the son-in-law was relieved she wasn't there to fuck up his wedding. Becoming ill was karma. Not telling women playing I've Never... that she was milk intolerant was like going to an orgy and having sex with everybody whilst knowing you have crabs. Captain Sandy with a wig has munched on ladies before but is a bottom, now. A judge Judy superfan told another contestant to ziploc her joy. 20-Oct-2023
I tuned in because I wanted to survey the old hunk. There is no way a 72 year old can look that good. He's handsome, a people pleaser, tastes like Spanish Fly and wants to fuck. He proved his age when it took him about twenty minutes to put on his shoes. Good editing. Wink, wink. There were no Goldiggers amongst the 20 but I noticed a few madams and ex whores. Including younglings would have created the tension women of that age experience. Most of the elder women were loopy, defining an era that's no longer safe. I like Ellen. I don't know why but I do. One of the women looked like Captain Sandy in a black wig, the Maude impressionist was kicked out, Jesse eye-fucked the bachelor and I felt grandpa's burden. Every time he votes out an eccentric aunt, America will judge him. "The man is dumping grannies!" 30-Sep-2023
Blue Beetle (2023)

The pace had no time to set-up character appreciation, it had a billion particles to settle. The family dynamic was food, drink, celebration and insanity. George Lopez added comedy schtick to his act. He looked like a character booted from Bedrock because he was too loud and ornery. The breast queen should be playing Lady MacBeth not becoming a free TV actor. I can see her washing blood from her hands and implementing Elvira's cleavage cut. The rest of the family and the leads apply stereotypes without explaining them. There is no such thing as a stereotype because it's only a description of our heritage. Universal speak. Nobody passed the classic TV Q test and the silliness hardly stopped. The best of the mythology turned into a fiesta. The family went everywhere together. Really? When did they masturbate? Why did the family get superpowers? Beetle's nemesis was a bigger and badder version of himself. Couldn't we have gotten something a little different? If the production wanted to fill the female quota, why didn't they concoct some awesome female villains? He has lots and no villain is scarier than a latin woman scorned. She'll slash your tires. 27-Nov-2023
Bachelor In Paradise (2014 - )

What have I done? The producers made daddy Palmer look like one of the weird kids from The Polar Express. His eyes didn't move, they dialed down the light, the sparkle and he started looking through people, not at them. My apologies, sir. 12-Nov-2023
Oh no! I think the show is on realtime. The new girl said Brayden looked like Johnny Depp, nobody threw anything in the ocean and worst of all, they restricted daddy Palmer's cornea movements! No more eye fucking. They cut away just as soon as tears started to stream down his face. 04-Nov-2023
Mr. Palmer is a faithful husband. He only eyefucks men. It was fun to see Wells eat his burrito, though. Somebody looked like they were going to join a supremacist group after getting dumped. Brayden is a pirate that has all the women aflutter. Can all the girls fuck him and dump him so I can stop obsessing about him? Were asses covered up because they pooped themselves or because we might get excited? Yo, you can't be the fairer sex if you believe everything a man says. Kat's birthday cake looked nasty. Why are these people allowed to throw anything into the ocean? Doesn't she know that Flipper can get diabetes? 28-Oct-2023
Woohoo! The Palmer eye-fucked the newbie in an episode where not much happened. If you're demanding honesty from a man, don't do it like Kat. She hates the truth. 23-Oct-2023
Brayden's beauty suffers intense consequences because he can't deliver. Sean looks like a dream prince that Dreamworks dreamed up. There is no rational reason why Will should act sensitive when being dumped. Aaron needs to butt fuck his girl so she can stay regular and alive. She is a walking testament of why travel sucks. Wells is a cute package that the contestants keep unwrapping. He was icked by the baby incident and masterclassed he wasn't. He gleamed for Dreamworks but was bored with pretty head yet bounced back for latino flair. The theme is past promises made to people they weren't attracted to and the people who can't accept it. Jesse Palmer hasn't eye-fucked anyone and that's worrisome. They're so good. Men only! The thighs are wide, the legs are nice, the men have bite, are succulent and falling apart for trying to make someone else happy. Is this how toxic masculinity is created? 18-Oct-2023
Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse (2023)

I've never met a Puerto Rican that talks like Miles. Even though he's half the race he would never retain his father's accent because no Puerto Rican mother would allow it. He lives like a Puerto Rican. By the way, we are more than platanos and empanadas. We also love pork, rice, fried everything, chicken, fish, beef, chinese food, lasagne, pizza, anything and beans. If the father is black and the mother is Puerto Rican where did the Morales name come from? Bad Bunny, Ricky Martin and Izzy from Love is Blind S5 are great examples of Puerto Rican speak. At least when white people did it they tried to sound like us. Peter Parker sounded like a dork flake. The first half abused a soundtrack that distorted musicology. It played like a 45 on repeat. Keeping up with the psychological speed was phenomenal, the art was crisp and when the musical score interrupted the playlist, it didn't suck. If your child itches, this is a classic, the others might become anxious. 02-Nov-2023
Chucky (2021-) 

Jake Wheeler is becoming quite a twink daddy. Devon Evans is aging in reverse. He looks like a kid. Lexy is gutsy without a personal life to lift her up. Jennifer T. and Jennifer C. need to battle for best bitch titles. The writers toned down Jennifer's character and shenanigans and she beams because of it. Devon Sawa has the best character, up to-date. I kept seeing Sawa's name on the credits but couldn't match him to his character, until now. Wow. You mean he was the hot method actor who plays the President? He is as precise in his acting as the puppeteers were on Chucky. The lip sync is perfect, different movements are being explored and the bastard is as funny and wicked as ever. The focus of this season is The White House and aging. Love it! 03-Dec-2021
Love Is Blind (2020)

Dude, the thigh lord has Sith powers. I haven't stopped eating the insides of my mouth since I last saw him. 19-Oct-2023
Reunion. It was lonely and hollow. Izzy's thigh was not in full display but the women's legs and boobies were. Uche stalks Milton, now. Lydia is laughing and planning something hysterical. Aaliyah came to put Lydia on the spot for lying and showing off. Milton's family wardens like Lydia, now. They figured getting her to be them so she can change him is easier than showing emotions. Credit Report Princess makes no sense. She's blaming a thigh lord for wanting the same things she wants. His lost and found are memories of trying on girly things so he can relate. JP needs to visit Amish country. Taylor looked fabulous but her make-up was doubled. One layer would have made her shine. She chose to sparkle. The only reason to watch was Izzy. The fake smile and congratulations had a slow-mo effect at the reunion. As soon as he did anything inside his mouth the camera turned away. He rocked some cool sock, though. 16-Oct-2023
The latin mothers were in sync masterclassing a mother that doesn't exist. Izzy ate the insides of his mouth one more time and I wanted to be Ant-Man swirling in it. Didn't it seem like the credit report princess' parents were trying to unload her? Is Lydia still stalking Uche? 14-Oct-2023
S5E8-E9. Uche was invited to the party to make Lydia squirm. Lydia turned red and became a giant animated monster. She emoted so distinctly it almost felt real. I liked it better when it was blamed on hysteria rather than on emotion. Emotions are supposed to be good. Why did Milton's parents look so guilty? Did they look her up? Did Uche call the family to tell them how wonderful she is and fucked up? Is he texting Milton every half hour? Milton kept excusing his parents' lack of hospitality on organics. They weren't like Lydia's. They spit hate in your face and can't teach their offspring how to open wine bottles. Lydia's restraint and self food service was worth bowing to. Mother and daughter-in-law swept her from her pasta and dragged her to the interrogation room where they showed off their warden skills. Lydia studied rocks most of her life but couldn't comprehend the word minute. Minute, when something is way smaller than the rest, like sand is to rock. The thigh jedi and his assignment enacted what bi-polar looks like. Izzy was drunk, frisky and adorable. She started a kitchen argument because he wanted to make love and she needed more attention. Guess who won? He lost control. His legs shook constantly, even when on a great date. Oh. That's how he keeps his thighs in shape. She made him cry like a puppy. We witnessed the aftermath of his secret. He started eating the insides of his mouth, again. I'm sure he ate more than the cameras cared to show. He can't afford to buy her a handbag! He needs to update his profile, "looking for suga mamas and papas that like perfect thigh." 06-Oct-2023
S5. There is a thigh jedi in the house. He's too good to be true. He keeps forcing smiles, though. Is someone buzzing him? His to be is a spoiled princess that wants old fashioned notions and female empowerment in a man. There is something he's not telling that is screaming to come out. The father-in-law expressed a gangster welcome with a threat. Whenever the princess emotes he eats the inside of his mouth. When they were in the kitchen arguing about how poor he's going to become, I thought he was going to eat right through and damage his beautiful face with a hole. In bed one night, he almost eyerolled his assignment/princess but caught himself in time. When a man says he wants a woman to wear no makeup. He wants her to be a little girl. That's the reason women wear makeup, to distinguish themselves from their daughters, so daddy doesn't take a special interest in them. It's like fucking another woman. Uche is making it known that Lydia is a stalker with a big mouth, doesn't allow much breathing room and has a suspicious mama. I think Uche proved himself stupid by stalking three people throughout the show. 17-Apr-2023
Little Mermaid (2023)

"I would have made Prince Eric an enslaved black royal in a slave boat that crashed in the sea. Black Ariel saves him but must fight a racist society to get him back to his tribe. If you're going to invest in a culture, invest. 06-Sep-2023
Halle Bailey is resplendent with no significant voice. The movie is not her fault. Javier Bardem created enough quake to make me want to suck his dick under the table. My apologies Lady Penelope, it's only a dream. Fish and birds suffered from unfortunate casting and drawing. Lady McCarthy was doing fake Brady Bunch Shakespeare with an SNL accent. Ok. If she actually sings like that why does she sing crappy in the commercials? Prince Eric sang only one song. Thank god! I would have never filmed that. Marshall had trouble imagining and most of the cast were confused. It's the best film Marshall has directed but it's hollow. 06-Sep-2023
F4: Rise Of The Silver Surfer (2007)

I'm not sure but I think they neutered the Silver Surfer. I remember having seen the film during it's time and I noticed one. I don't forget crotches. The whole feels cheaper. Johnny lost his appeal and became vapid. Sue Storm continued to be listless and unheroic with a crappy blonde wig. Kerry Washington's blind brick lover was under-appreciated. The Thing was sort of plastic. Mr. Fantastic's powers were mostly comic relief and unbelievable. When Torch gains extra powers, it's fun but when "you know who" returns as Dr. Doom all is gloom. Galactus was a no-show because nobody knew how to incorporate a bigger thing than god into the real world. Really? A Galactus that was bigger than Thanos sitting on a throne commanding his slave, Silver Surfer, to destroy so he could feed, is brilliant. 17-Jul-2023
Deep Fake Love (2023-)

S1E6. The hostess melted ice like climate change and gave a grieving contestant a much appreciated mom hug. Sweet. 09-Jul-2023
S1E5. Our European brethren don't fuck around. Fright and overreaction. The moment the couples landed on Lost Island they were jittering, twitching and sweating for things that they already had. The show separates partners into Venus and Mars locations, presuming Venus is for bottoms and Mars is for tops or they could be trying to trick us and its the other way around. The object of the game is to observe footage of their frolicking partners on another planet and guess whether the footage was real or faked for cash. The reactions were so hysterical that I stopped snoring so I could laugh. Latinos invented drama by spelling it. The first time they go into the White Room, they are shown footage of their counterparts in real or inappropriate interactions. Things get dicey when the real clips got racier than the fake ones and the tricks are on them. The test doesn't want to fix the relationship but the individual. Why does the gay couple only get one temptation? I'd expect two each, at least. The hostess is a chillmeister. The contestants were crying hysterically after watching shocking footage and instead of being motherly she pushed them to answer if they thought it was real or fake. She's the only one that got wardrobe money, too. 08-Jul-2023
Fright (1971)

It predated classics that trumped it. It was a template for the future. It was also a piece of junk. It was a film full of ideas that had to bombastically announce them. Michael Myers lived in a multi-verse where Laurie Strode "is" his sister. He kidnaps her, a baby, rapes her in front of the child and recoils until he's horny again. Did she give birth to Michael Myers, Jr. from multi-verse Halloweens? There was a glimmer of Joker's "dance with the devil" choreography. It made babysitting a shitty job. The privileged are forced to hire child haters. The child was adorable even when being manhandled by all sorts of creepy adults. The house is where you want to film it, Susan George didn't need to act and everybody needed to tone it down. 04-Jul-2023
Knock At The Cabin (2023)

The first shot aspired to greatness. People sharing the same belief targeted for survival. Dave Bautista jumped off the page and ended up a Lex Luthor on some greater planet. The director doomed art with mumbo jumbo and lucky coins. I mentally conducted scenes before they happened. The kid was cute but I totally wanted her to be a M3GN. They filleted a Harry Potter veteran before his time and Ben Aldrige's identity were his well crafted legs. I'm fuzzy on his face, though. Jonathan Groff chose Edith Bunker likability as his acting inspiration, he was a dowdy housewife with the spirit of a freedom fighter. The director separated reality from conflict and ruined the whole thing. 28-Jun-2023
Fantastic Four (2005)

If you left kernels at the bottom of the popcorn bucket, expecting the movie to pop them, it does not. The origin story is deprived of force because of its oversimplification. Only three members achieved not looking foolish in their embodiments. Chris Evans steals everything with his bad boy swag, partial nudity and up to your imagination charm. Michael Chiklis was turned to brick, his eyes the main conveyor and I felt him. Kerry Washington was brave to enact being blind and fucking a brick dick. Ion Gruffud was chosen from a dork photo line-up. Jessica Alba decided to go bronze skin with blonde hair which is irrelevant to who she's portraying. I always envisioned Sue Storm as a mature-minded leader. Every breath Alba shared, purred, "I'm sexy, are you going to marry me or what?" According to the film, Sue Storm has no reason to powerfully exist except to stop traffic, plea for love, get undressed and be invisible. She's no Barbara Bain. Julian Macmahon's Dr. Doom made my popcorn explode with a whimper. He acted like he was in a live comic book written by those Power Rangers people. He cheapened the film. The film is more excited about what effects can do than establishing a purpose for a character's existence. Action is in a rush to move on and be forgotten. Its enjoyable but "let's put it in the kids' dvd section, for now. 16-Jun-2023
Cocaine Bear (2023)

Bloody-minded hilarity. 15-Jun-2023
Shazam! Fury Of The Gods (2023)

A Saturday morning kiddie show that plays after the popular ones have aired and kids watch whilst having lunch. It can't shake off the silliness so it embraced it. Bad mistake. It only works if it's funny. Some of the writers asked their children what they would like to see and the parents yucked it up. Elegant ladies of maturity shouldn't have to wear clunky armor especially if they're witches. The villains are not much of a threat. They just need more "home" visits from the family. Why did they pile on so much ick hair and clothing on Hinsou's god? Zachary Levi. His solution when discomfited is to make a face or a nine year's old gesture. His younger alter ego is a teenager on his way to becoming a man. They work as separate units but not as a whole. They copy nothing from each other. Billy's best friend's storyline had the emotional heft that Shazam's didn't. It doesn't even take us on a fantastical journey. It was a scenic bus ride to Walmart. 07-Jun-2023
Love Is Blind (2020)

Reunion. Kwame was looking real fine tethered to his million dollar mink. Was the derogatory remark Marshall used on Jackie, "trans?" How lgbtq of him. Prop Bro You changed his looks but kept Joe's drawl. The gorgeous mad mane was replaced by chemicals that flattened their splendor. He squished a bigger body and he gained an intellectual's beard. He's either hiding his identity, ready to disappear or he's playing Joe's stuntman for the final season of You. Original Joe decided to channel Cuban Pete. All he needed was a sombrero and a set of bongos between his legs. I never realized how much insignificance he applies to the person that couldn't be ladylike. I wanted to be an earplug stuck on a couch listening to the Yous whispering:
OrgU: I'm losing it brother
ProBroU: Cool it! Remember we have cages out there! Remember? (he talks low, droney and faster than it sounds)
OrgU: She's giving me anxiety. I Can't breathe. (can't breathe)
Slap!!!
Zack played a tune whose every other word was you. That's hilarious!
The king makes a cameo to show the world that he can create. 17-Apr-2023
Poor Kwame. Not for long. Hookers still exist and there is hope. Original You was a pretty creep. Super tight curls? Eh! Seems like they're hiding something. His pattern of speaking changed after the booth. He couldn't retain a lower, crisper register. I remembered because it shows up for the wedding but not for anything else. His voice is much squeakier. Did they really play serial killer music during Prop Bro's wedding decision? Friday the 13th type? Was that a heartbeat effect? Did she really call him You? Original You lives outside his head while Prop Bro You carries it like a burden. Original was modeled angelic and the other boob would be attractive if they soaped up more. Don't touch the hair, though, unless he's got unnatural stuff coming out of it. Prop has to act quickly and Original lets it build. Original is in the third stage of his assignment and Prop is one step ahead of him. Original has planted his seed but not gained ownership. 14-Apr-2023
S4E11. Prop Bro You hates strippers, especially unattractive ones. He usually eats them for lunch. When he was in the pool with Bliss he looked like he was imagining what parts of her he would fry first. If he were a serial killer that is. Chelsea kept acting the part even as a hairdresser burnt her hair. She's psychic too, like that pretty terrifying celebrity twink. She immediately pegged Kwame's sister because she was the only black woman to enter the bridal suite. 08-Apr-2023
S4E10. Somebody is a virgin because they haven't found a satisfying top. Prop Bros #3 tried to convince his fiancee's father to approve of him but he kept smiling like Joker and talking like You. Kwame found a way to excuse his fiancee's future disappointment. His mother. Jackelina is free to get fucked hard whilst Marshalll keeps looking the word up. 08-Apr-2023
S4E9. That lady Chelsea thinks that relationships are about being serviced. Kwame needs to fastball her. Marshall is petrified of vagina. Pretty eyes can't fuck. Jackelina, run! Zach is still property managing his You charisma. TG Bliss is desperate. If a man doesn't want to engage a partner in sex it's because he has an STD or doesn't have a knack for it. Dump. 07-Apr-2023
Original You's future father-in-law pegged him as a really nice guy or a serial killer. You slaughtered all of Micah's friends' vaginas in one swipe. That lady put a damper in the sportsman's itinerary of happiness by clamping down on a future litter. A contestant that was not mentally profiled accused her fiancee of not being man enough. She doesn't want attention, affection or walkouts. She wants to get banged hard. Cue sensitive fucking and mild spit. 01-Apr-2023
The women came to vamp and conquer men that will never satisfy them but hopefully, will keep them barefoot and pregnant with a ring on it. The feminist plan is to train men to lie about everything so the women can feel loved and acknowledged. A man will say anything to a woman for a steady prospective orgasm. It means less outside hookups, more money and lots of family time. The women turned the dating show into The Hunger Games because they hate other women. Hearing women fangirling to idiot things men make up, is disconcerting. The banter appeared read off a corny romance novel or movie, they memorized. When you swoon at bad singing you will regret it. Their were 2 Joes from You. One of them looked like an impassioned third Property Brother. The women that connived for them are not amused. Dude, Prop Bro is the hottest man there. It's okay. The contestants have realized that the purpose of the show is to get married and bear fucking children from all that they desire so they too can make regrettable choices in life. 15-Feb-2023