All Posts Tagged as 'Funny'
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Accidente (2024)
It rivets early but the cast kept chugging. An accident occurs that tests the strength of several families. Intriguing twists kept me interested. The fault of the accident was misfortune. The actors appeared hired from mysterious little black books. All fuckable. Charro should get an award for making toes curl. That gorgeous motherfucker. I noticed mexicans have perkier asses than other boys. I couldn't find a flat ass. Even the little ass was perky. The story didn't know when to quit and cash in their chips. It became melodramatic and telenovela centric. The players pulled their weight but gravity matter ignored them. The story became too coincidental to explain. It over reached. Fun was had and some surprises worked but the teapot wasn't hot enough to make tea. 03-Sep-2024
Bromans UK (2017-)
An International Male catalog with skimpy naked men that should be licked. 31-Aug-2024
Bachelorette, The (2003-)
A neither would be most welcome. 30-Aug-2024
Dude, these guys are creeping me out. 30-Jul-2024
Aaron left. Of course she did. 24-Jul-2024
I hope this child has a lot of protection. How do you choose among wolves? Aaron is representing the LGBTQ community. Devin is all mouth. He can please casting but can he woo a woman? Should he even try? Hakeem has never watched an episode of the Simpsons. Jonathon looks like the kind of guy that would fuck your brains out until he gets Britney's number. Sam has a very pretty face. What's his sexual problem? Everyone acts like their agents taught them how to act. I pity the fool. 18-Jul-2024
...he has one of world's largest penises
A British artist with a Jamaican accent when he raps is 'seriously thinking' about monetising his huge willy in exchange for a multi-million pound OnlyFans deal.
...he has one of world's largest penises
MORTIFIED after 'ruining' friend's wedding photos with his enormous WEDGIE
The longest penis sizes around the world
Inside the big D-list
The truth about ‘summer penis’
Country with the biggest average penis size in the world
Our Blushing Brides (1930)
Three working girls put their retirement on speed. The only way a woman could claim early retirement was to meet a man of privilege. The women were protective of each other and the men were perverse. The fate of all three women are different. By the end, the film relinquishes its madcap wit for serious drama. Joan Crawford was the big sister every friend needed. When lady Joan ignited, it was firecracker. Her character seemed to contradict herself, though. She couldn't succumb to a sexy one night stand with her dream date. Really? Dude, he had the most lavish treehouse ever. It had retracting stairs! And a view! Robert Montgomery was a pretty little thing that happenened to be the boss of the store the girls sold and modeled for. They wore new fashion to convince snobby zillas, they were attractive. Acting was pure, the funny had limits, and Lady Joan roared. 14-Aug-2024
Love Is Blind Mexico (2024)
In some cases it has to be. Neither sex display longevity skills.
She: Can he afford rent?
He: please be fuckable.
She: I lied in the pods about the quantity of children I have. Will he still babysit?
He: I hope she doesn't smell.
She: how dare you!
When my mind drifted I visualized an even faster and tackier method of hooking up. A gloryhole. The boys stick it in whatever sounds good and whichever female produces first will officially get married on live TV. The contestants are bold and calculating. I've endured 3 proposals and I'm not even done with ep. 2. Man cannot control woman unless he marries her. 11-Aug-2024
Love Island UK (2019-)
Women are pursuing these motherfuckers because there is a cash prize at the end, correct? I don't remember Reuben. There was nothing to latch onto. Josh must choose to be blacker or whiter. Yes, I had a doll that looked like Blade. Hugo combs his hair in reverse. I bet Konnor is a fantastic one nighter. Will must be hung. Joey is a doll. Sean is Jimmy Oleson. Ayo, we pray for you. I would have barbecued Trey like he was a lobster. Moziah reeks of beauty and nature. Ciaran has too many identities going on. 11-Jul-2024
House of Heat (2024-)
They look, talk and walk like ducks but don't like being called ducks. Only Fans creators are thrust inside a fish tank so they can observe, teach and grow their businesses. Some peel their clothes off while others tease it. Everyone is judgmental, scared and hostile. It was difficult to side with anyone because a lot of them believe they have the answer to surviving the mess they're in. Chase's beauty kept melting off the more he talked. The gay couple was so united in their bond that there was no space to breathe. They clung dependently like Venom and Hardy. The straight couple only had sex with each other on camera. They were special. She wanted to hold on to chastity. Any man that needs to fuck so many times a day already cheated and had the threesome she denied him. Brother gay with an appealing body needed to purse his lips, not glow them. The arguments are loud, repetitive and frustrating. Maybe the creators will realize the answer when they are outside the box. I don't know the answer but I know how it ends. The women questioned everything and added motives later. We never got an answer to the smelly pussygate dilemma. Was she sexually violated or were men just being themselves? Is that the reason we have to label everything? To distance ourselves from others? They close every argument like there will be a sequel. I wish my brain would function as fluidly as these creators. It made the cuckoo in my head clock pop. They are killing the mystery of the fantasy by telling too much. 29-Jul-2024
Homophobes are mad about Love Island USA stars...
Although these are two straight men, the internet has taken their casual homophobia to another level under the guise of using memes and "jokes," with rumors swirling that they are more than friends and with multiple X and TikTok posts implying Aaron (who was previously known for winning the first season of The Traitors UK) would rather date and be in a relationship Rob.
Homophobes are mad about Love Island USA stars...
Graduate, The (1967)
The film ponders thoughts of a future that exists against a romantic and sexual adventure. Besides the latin porn movies my parents took me to, this was my second time in a legit movie theatre. My lesbian aunt thought I should be exposed to art. I was embarrassed, though. The film rated higher than my intelligence. I did discover the secrets the adults were hiding and it was fascinating. Dustin Hoffman delivered cool vibes and technical practice. Anne Bancroft's controversial stamp is unmistakable. She was every straight boy's dream and every gay's nightmare. She established the cougar. She was to play Joan in Mommie Dearest but didn't. "What ifs" kept pouncing in my head. If Katherine Ross is nothing like her characters, I will cry. Talks are grown-up, defensive and obligatory. Direction is artistic and historic. 17-Jul-2024
Kind Lady (1951)
A band of marauders suck the life out of a rich elderly woman with kindness to spare, isolated loneliness and owner of great art. Maurice Evans adds finality to his charmed villain, Angela Lansbury exemplified trash with two hearts and there were constants that gave it hope. The suspense gripped, the actors ascended and the story fascinated. Lady Barrymore excelled as a victim worth saving. 28-Jun-2024
Perfect Match (2023-)
Finale. Nick rocked a shorts suit and I liked it. The stylist that decided to put long pants on Harry should've been reprimanded. Mama mia worked extra shifts so as not to return home to her daughter. I think I know why I made my GI Joe Kaz a bottom. Bryton won the thigh competition and a motorboat invitation. If Nigel were a GI Joe I would play with him. Izzy's date with Jessica consisted of him being an upside down Spider-Man dripping sweat down her throat. It all went downhill fast. He came to life at the party and looked like an adorable in shorts and white socks. Prince Eric tried to convince the voters that he was in love with his mermaid. She wasn't just a catch. The mermaid was caught off guard and sounded even phonier. The contestants voted with their hearts and surprised everyone. It had an I hate you all vibe. 22-Jun-2024
Hot diggity damn, Nick! Full shots of hunky men sitting in shorts while confessing, was priceless. Nick was naughty. Jess is so independent that she can raise her daughter without ever being seen. Harry. Why do men always have to explain themselves? Harry kept repeating Jess' daughter's name like he knew her for years so she would believe him and fall in love. "Jess, fuck his brains out until he can't walk but do not bring him home." All Harry wants is a luxurious leg massage and to be reminded of how beautiful they are. The men stood up for themselves by being quiet. The girls fought amongst their own with no perfect match to support them. When Kaz decided to sample, I understood his psychology. Beauty belongs to everyone. Perfect match should see him alone at toga parties. The blonde with the tresses and the big eyes looks like Emma Stone. Prince Eric's mindset lacked etiquette and consideration. A shark. Izzy did his best. He sort of memorized the producer's script and there were cue cards everywhere he looked but dude couldn't stop being awkward. I still dig the face. 15-Jun-2024
I always returned G.I. Joe Kaz to his manly state. Even though I washed the make-up off there were shadows. The moment Pazuzu noticed, G.I. Joe Kaz mysteriously disappeared. 08-Jun-2024
S2E2-5. Harry was not stirring my pot until I noticed his thigh to leg ratio. I boiled, my lid began to shake, float and rise. I noticed that there was a lot of that. It almost repaired my soul. When Jessica confessed to having a child, Harry asked where she was. Exactly! We've seen more of Jessica than her daughter has. Prince Eric from an off-broadway production of The Little Mermaid was returned to sea many times but somebody always rescued him. Fuck, I'd probably rescue him too if he didn't talk. I will ask no questions before night, night and I need to call him Eric. The sea is full of mermaids. My other G.I. Joe doll looked like Kaz. He was a soldier in green combats. I tore up his uniform, created a wig out of his undershirt, painted his face and made G.I. Joe Nick fuck the shit out of him. 08-Jun-2024
S2E2. Ack! 08-Jun-2024
S2E1. We don't watch Izzy because of the way he talks, we just want to lick him and squish him. Izzy hooked up with a goddess, it took him 23 minutes to finish. He spent at least 20 minutes in the bathroom and three minutes convincing her it would be good for her career. Nick almost lifted his skirt. Thighs for a later episode? Boy, he's got some daddy legs. Nice. He looked like one of the G.I. Joes I played with as a kid but shinier. Some cocky dink bragged that he was gifted a cookie for providing a great fuck. Dude, I got a whole house and did nothing! Stevan's tattoos were more aggressive than he was. The soft boys were being traded for angry chokesters they can't control. Women have permission to be promiscuous if they sign off on it. 08-Jun-2024
Something tells me that most of the men and half the women, would have found a perfect match had they cloned Francesca. Abbey decided to strip the thighmaster of his crown and knight him a dick. 02-Mar-2023
A questionable sex partner sort of dumped Francesca. Yippee! He did it so he could stay and torture the fuck out of the man inside her. In the last aired episode he shaved his body to look more like a bitch. A gorgeous virgin who promises sex only in marriage is mandating that a partner suffer poor sex for the rest of their lives. He's not a lover, he's your brother. 24-Feb-2023
They should give camera people a special award for rewarding viewers with juicy thigh shots. The party started as soon as the Thigh King twitched in his shorts. They were everywhere. I haven't caught up yet but I hope somebody dumps Francesca. All she's doing is trying on different dicks. Like they were dresses at a bargain basement store. That poor sad flat black boy. 22-Feb-2023
Bridgerton (2020-)
Colin loved Penelope like a brother and took passion out of romance. She should've courted Eloise, or at least, Genevieve. A lesbian wedding a must enjoyment. Polly Parker convicted herself as a single woman having to do it all. Two daughters are spoiled and the other lives on social media clouds. Polly turned a villain into a worthy victim and the daughters were hilarious. Cressida is a character for the ages. Madsen slipped into gregarious outfits and ate evil little bitch as a protein. She was awesome. Nicola supplied the right amount of blood. I think Bailey was wasting his humps on a pillow. His wife checked out. Easy fix. She transforms into a man and returns as the beautiful black prince from the first season. The wife wont get fired. They can dedicate a season or two to exploring how she became. I will have a squish party if the boxer comes out or disrobes (not in front of the wife, of course.) It transports us to a beautiful, outlandish, artistic world. 19-Jun-2024
S3E5. The only bump I want to see is on Jonathan Bailey's bum. Colin did not eat Pen like a french pastry and she didn't knock the salt off his pretzel. Intimacy skied into sibling fuckery in frozen waters. He needed to tongue her down, squeeze and suck the shit out of that bounty and impress her and us with Bridgerton "John Holmes" dick. Excellence returned with a sense of humor. Mama and daughter Bridgerton need to swap partners. One deserves a virgin and the other is boring. Can Will Mondrich come out too? 17-Jun-2024
Interracial coupling was not natural. Mrs. Bridgerton didn't freak out and the daughter didn't scream rape because he was dainty, dark and didn't like to talk. 28-May-2024
Are we ever going to see a man work? The owner/bartender doesn't count. He only serves drinks when he's there which is rare. 28-May-2024
Season 3. The most edible one needs to stop the presses. Is it always going to be about the denial that hate is love, marriage is a must and density will guide the way? I mean't destiny. I'm disappointed. The black talent brought it up a notch. Lowering it would have added character depth. "You wowed us." "Provoke me to empathize."
28-May-2024
Season Two was as beautiful as one of Lord Bridgerton's ass muscles. Queen Charlotte. Lady Danbury. Lady Bridgerton. Lady Portia. Eloise. Pen. Wigs. Costumes. Romance. Moooah. 30-Mar-2022
S1E8. A woman wraps up the marriage contract when she can birth a good shank to serve the round table. Men like ideals in women's heads so that our explanations make sense to them. It was brotime, sweetie! They took the cultures out of the equation. We judge them individually. Every actor willed good force. It was fun, it was camp, it was time and we're in it. The ending was delicious and I'm trading the duke in for the boxer. The duke has an "I'm so pretty" snarl. The other looks like my camper. Good job. 28-Dec-2020
S1E7. Mid-thru is an explanation of how black culture became elite. I bought it. The series needs more scandal and debauchery though. I'm replacing yes, daddy with yes, duke. 27-Dec-2020
S1E2. Not necessarily the show I want to binge on after mother telling me my black is white but it's Shonda so I'll give it a go. The shock of seeing black empowered gentleman and ladies of the pre-Victorian era makes my brain explode with fact check assumptions. I don't because I want to accept it on its own merit. Most of the cast whistles, foams and pours whilst the rest couldn't get out of their modern heads. The business at hand is to score the most pristine and delicate virgin hopefully with fine manners (a "yes girl") to fulfill a man's dream of future family and success. A woman's power is to profit from the business, band and thwart any mismatch that might bring a daughter harm and make sons proud. Shonda adds her sight of man appreciation, Shondaspeare fast talk and on your knees intrigue. I remember Nicola Coughlan because I wanted to eat her like she ate that cake. She's delicious. The picture for myself didn't get any clearer because I'm watching black people pretending to live whites lives. It makes the future modern brain wonder what the hate was all about. 26-Dec-2020
Hitman (2024)
I always thought Glen Powell was cute and up for anything. The film is devoid of action and unlike an episode of Police Woman. Chemistry almost always works when a latina is involved. The passion seemed legitimate. Powell kept donning disguises like he was at a Shakespeare festival. I've never seen an actor so relaxed and ready. Ryan Reynolds does not always have to play Deadpool. He was having fun, it was infectious and he saved a fluff piece. 11-Jun-2024
Summer House (2017-)
Reunion Pt. 1. Dude, Carl has Ozempic neck. Ciara confused a fuck for a marriage proposal with ten kids. Whatever Wes is hiding must be inside his underwear because the part in his hair reminds me of a barber shop quartet. Lindsay and Carl are both liars except the giant slayed his prey with one cancellation. Why wasn't Robin Hood sitting on Amanda's lap? Isn't his ass worth it? 07-Jun-2024
Paige schooled Ariana DeBose on what a mentally challenged slut is. Is Robin Hood aware that we can flip him like a pancake and concentrate on that instead? Ciara kissed the aioli and didn't throw up. Gabby's problem is that she can't hit someone. Ariana DeBose? Bravo is not like BET. Carl needs to know that he can also be flipped and motor boated from behind. 27-Apr-2024
Ariana DeBose can replace Danielle and nobody would notice. Can Ciara please stop pretending to like white people? Can Lindsay stop pretending that there isn't more to her and the balloon guy than previously suggested? Is she diddying him to other girls? Is Amanda unaware that any man would eat and massage Robin Hood's ass if he asked? Is Lindsay aware that anybody would motorboat her giant, without asking, because of his hairy thunder thighs? 15-May-2023
Is dating Lindsay making the giant's hands smaller? 12-Mar-2023