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Married At First Sight Australia (2015-)  Woof

My 12 year old cocksucker swallowed Hades' cum and it tasted like a raspberry margarita. Pretty boys don't need to try as hard in relationships when set up with insecure mole faces. Hercules is not that hot because he smells like a chimp. Daniel did not pass the good dick test. The horse is ashamed to admit that she was set up with a fart. Al fixed his wife by shoving his Bizarro Colin Jost dick inside her. Married women who find solace prescribing pity to a newly single newlywed are sluts. 09-Jun-2022
Hades arises from his tomb to test humanity's tolerance for truth. A woman can only fathom a dream if a gay man concocts it. Man losing his hardon for a cultural thing is a real thing. He's bald Jerry, is no longer sexually gratifying his ick. Brent is sweet to make you fat and incapable of moving when he cleans you out. Al Perkins always looks surprised to fuck. He's prettier than a boy bander and is successful in bed. That's not possible! What is his crime? A giant ear bit texan should not have to explain himself to a pretend Hillary. Maybe he hates you because you're not doing Asian right not because he hates your culture. Hades set our dicks on fire. 06-May-2022
Season 6 was withheld from us because we are not mature enough to handle emotional failure. Hades and his coven interpret every relationship based on a fairytale and are genuinely horrified when reality proves it untrue. Hades unleashes romper terminators to seduce Ares and Hercules to ignite the audience and insult the wives. I could taste the master's lava. I threw up but didn't explode. 01-Oct-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Crapfun, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Insulting, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Psychological, Reality, Romance, Scary, Star Watt, Sweet, Wig Crack, Words Spoke, Writ For Short Attn Spans

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09-Jun-2022


Joe Millionaire: For Richer Or Poorer (2022-) Woof

The Joes met the ladies' families. The organization could not release any family members of cartel girl due to safety concerns so they sent a muscle disguised as a GBFF. He was hilarious. One of the fathers became horny and cringey. He warned the Joes about his daughter's "down there" and nobody flinched. A spider? What? One of the Joe's thought the gay dads were strippers. What else would they be? They were good looking. 18-Feb-2022
The semi Joes eliminated the girl whose makeup couldn't hide her age. Hahaha. 03-Feb-2022
There is no one to explore except cartel girl. Mother demands that Tarzan Joe, her future baby daddy with no money, spare her all the attention, even if he's fondling another. Unfortunately, fondling is not acceptable if its done to your face. Cartel girl is desperate. She gets a call from the boss threatening to cancel baby feedings if she doesn't nab that millionaire. Meanwhile, the iguanas are falling from the skies. The men imprinted their preferences and I hope a smart woman remembers them. "The less make-up the better or young, goldiggers are just finger fucks, children are an item and men don't give a shit." - Joe Millionaire 29-Jan-2022
The unbalanced black flat chick ended her rage after it was discovered that she was too mentally unwell (she spoke truths that insane people don't want to hear). White people like to have fun. They don't whine if their hair frizzes up like their foe. They just reinvent it. The latin mother is so obsessed with her conquest that it feels like she has a cartel up her ass forcing her to do so. Adios. My pecker is like a compass and the needle is not pointing to either Joe. Can we bring original Joe in? He may be a hideous bear now but I'm sure he can still make slurps sing. 23-Jan-2022
It took two bachelors to add up to one Joe Millionaire. The original's historical "slurp around the world" was magnificence. My pecker picked the poor one until I got to know him then I switched. Tarzan hair is fun but he's such a pendejo. He has no sexual entitlement. Cowboy Cheeky is fuckable in a Chucky kind of way. He has a bubbly ass. In my day, they would have called the contestants, escapees from mental institutions. A desperate "housewife to be" decides to wear the same dress as another contestant. Neither chose to "rock" the shitty dress and left it up to the millionaire to decide which tacky slut filled it the least. It depends how gay the men are. Black girl gets drunk and starts feeling used. She goes on a rant. White girls are not having it so they plot. Mothers of America. Shame on You! You've turned your daughters into dumb sluts competing for basic. Original Joe hands. Classic. 10-Jan-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Comfort Food, Cowboy, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Emasculating, Fake, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Hilarious, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Predictable, Preposterous, Psychological, Reality, Revenge, Romance, Scary, Showy, Shrill Act, Silly, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Wit Crack, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Tough

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18-Feb-2022


Chucky (2021-) ArfUpgradeWoof

The mythology exploded into bits. The Frankenstein and Gremlins intermingle registered anew. Tiffany erupted into a countess of evil. Our favorite orphans showed and blew shit up. In style. Little gay boys kicked ass. The twists and consequences were ridiculously entertaining. Chucky popped a different pill and surprised us. He's become a deeper hallucination. I love how his doll legs flail when he's killing someone. He says all the stupid shit we're thinking. He's hilarious. Lip synch has improved. He's fucking awesome. It was a bang with a but. I was not amused by the Chucky Show at the end. 03-Dec-2021
S1E6. Chucky celebrated Mother's Day by being a cruel adult. Black gay boyfriend is sweet. The babies are creating a vibe. Main baby needs to step up the emotion. I can see him staring at the nothing he sees when the director yells at him otherwise. Tiffany tickled. Chucky delighted and the show didn't give a shit. It dared cancel people we liked. That's scary. 24-Nov-2021
Hello Gladys Kravitz. 20-Oct-2021
Chucky's back and he hasn't aged. Tech needs to fix his lip-synching. It's off. Chucky is owned by an angry teen with artistic deficiencies and obscure classmates. Hateful characters abound so we can watch murder without guilt. The teenager walks around with a giant doll throughout the school day and makes it home safe. WTF? Chucky supplied giggles, guffaws and revenge. Go Chucky! 15-Oct-2021

Tags: 2020s, Action Fun, Art, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Classic, Crapfun, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Director Art, Director's Slice, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay, Heart Writ, Hilarious, Horror, Mean Spirited, Nostalgic, Over the Top, Scary, Silly, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Suspense, Sweet, Timid, Twisty, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight, Writ Tough

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03-Dec-2021


Squid Game (2021) Full Moon

If you can't afford happy things, you become bitter, if your are unable to provide, you become addicted and if you can't eat, you die. It's called poverty. A group of instinctual individuals are given the opportunity to have their financial struggles resolved. They have to play children's games that are only safe in rhythm but not rhyme. If you lose, you die. If you win, it's a lot. The characters are specific, writing is a brainstorm and the whole is an abundance of I've never seen anything like this before. 07-Oct-2021
S1E7. The VIPs were from Palm Springs. 05-Oct-2021
S1E4. I am petrified and addicted. 01-Oct-2021

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Action, Best In Drama, Brutal, Chemistry, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director Art, Discomfort, Drama, Foreign, From Another Planet, Game Show, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Heartbreaking, Hot Swatch, Music Rocks, Mystery, Political, Psychological, Relationships, Scary, Sci-Fi, Sentimental, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet, Tough, Twisty, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight, Writ Tough, Writing Reigns

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07-Oct-2021


Married At First Sight (2014-) Howl

Reunion 2. Haley & Jacob. Captain Rio was de feathered because Shrek dragons are heralded as heroes and roosters are unforgivable if they can't bring their chicks to climax. Daddy needs to go oink. We love the 80s and sitting on floppy dicks. Brown Robin. Dude, are you flirting with me? (see pic above.) I accept. Erik. Daddy was punished for being fatherly towards his daughter and not accepting that a girl her age needs to socialize with other boys. Wink, wink. Shlumber Party! The experts. Why didn't the ladies sit together? Woke hug moments missed. Wow. Dr. Pepper looked at Dr. Viv without contempt. Chris became a legal dispute. "We didn't know he was a schmuck. We got fooled just like everybody else. What are we experts? Good God." The children closed the show with a request to the viewers to treat them like the semi-gods they came on TV to be not like celebrities from Hollywood. Play-acting is real.

(Next season: cats! Dr Viv and hats! I'm on it.) 26-May-2021
Virginia & Erik. The big bad wolf, little red riding hood and grandma guts joined the reunion. Daddy was very proud of his little girl gushing googles and acting all Romper Room. If Virginia were a drunk she would remember something offputting about her buddies instead she feels closer to them after their slumber parties. Good cheap wine. Feminism cancelled "whoredom the thought" but not the feeling. Sorry, can't teach her anything. Pajama party on! Is that red cup mine? (I see drunk vaginal exams in her future.) Clara & Ryan. Ryan is still a "pussy" virgin. He'd rather marry her again than fuck her. Poor Starfire. Briana & Vincent. They were cute. Vincent got me when he laughed at the horse clip thinking about what I said. Looks like a pork roast is in daddy's future. The boss is gone. Chris & Paige. Everybody hates Chris and the show will do what's legally possible to humiliate him. 19-May-2021
Some contestants remained homeless. Dr. Pep stared at Dr. Viv with the same dread as a cat. There is no cure for bossy. 13-May-2021
Contract negotiations are up and the married strangers have to decide if the extra money is worth faking it for another year. Brown Robin & Hillbilly Starfire. I have no idea what he's saying and somebody needs to check her pilot light. Briana & Vincent. I knew he hated her. He wants a wife that will keep him company, light his stove and cook some delicious pork, not a congressional candidate. Why did she make him apologize for having a sexual preference but she couldn't return the courtesy for being bossy? Bossy is not attractive or empowering. They cancel people for that. See Leah Michelle. If he needs to change, she needs to change or some pork bitch is gonna steal him. Oops. He had his vengeance. He fucked up her hair! Haley & Jacob. The production offered her a lot of money and she is homeless. The dinner found them wanting to smirk, giggle and compare how much each received in contract negotiations. They couldn't even fake it. Virginia & Erik. The individuals were asked scripted questions by their very stiff friends except for Erik's daughter. Her sleepover pal (wink, wink) cowboy'd up, gave her a nod and asked "how much we gettin'?" Father is bossy too but children need enforcement so they don't grow up bossy. 29-Apr-2021
Virginia & Erik. Daddy was astounded that his cheating wife doesn't like surprises. The cats. Dude, speak to Doctor Viviana. She knows how to secretly get rid of cats. Briana & Vincent. Squish squirmed when his wife admitted to thieving. Did he marry a thug? The horse. Latin men think that if they fall off a horse, the horse will try to fuck them. Haley & Jacob. Haley didn't care that she and her partner knew all the game answers about each other, she was still punishing him for being a bad fuck. When daddy Rio drank from the trophy cup I wanted to bear Haley's burden. Oy. Brown Robin and Hillbilly Starfire made it to the retreat. The secret to a rotund butt is to eat lots of chips with dip and never stick your dick in a vagina. 15-Apr-2021

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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26-May-2021


Married At First Sight (2014-) Howl

Virginia & Eric. Daddy tried to impress his daughter with his Snoopy skills. He was the Red Baron. She complained that he didn't spend enough time with her family. Daddy doesn't want to hang around people his age. It's nerve wracking. Briana & Vincent. Lucy plotted for Ricky to see her dance, he trained to ignore her. She fully acclaimed herself, he was full of boredom. She teased maternity and snapped his attention back but when she extended the expiration date he held back. "A dancer, my ass!" Clara & Ryan. He's failed every mental health wellness test I can think of. Of course he's willing to have relationships with her family. He doesn't have to fuck them either. He makes his vibrant wife "hand job" him every night because she is not worthy of full penetration. I want him and Chris to make a Fans Only video. I want to see Chris alligator fuck the shit out of Ryan's balloon clown ass. Haley & Jacob. My favorite bird (Rio) and princess (Lilly of The Valley) competed for alphadom. Jacob needs to bend over immediately because her strap is hard and he lost. Did daddy call himself an eagle and her a dragon? Like the one in Shrek? 15-Apr-2021
Chris explained to Pastor Cal that the reason he was explosive on the show is because they set him up with a grenade. I wished El Pastor would have utilized some of the cheap scenery and bashed him with it. The experts were so professional that it felt like they were reading my mind. Virginia and Erik. One of the disadvantages of being a daddy is you get to watch your little girl go on dates and come home plastered. Haley and Jacob. All I heard were inner screams during Haley's therapy session. "If he touches me again...I'll scream...I swear it!" Oooh maybe he's CIA. Clara and Ryan. Clara, don't beg for sex. Men who make their partners wait for sex usually suck at it. She needs to renew her contract and corral herself the tallest man of her dreams. Briana and Vincent. Ricky Ricardo schemed to get Lucy to agree to let him sleep late with his newly conceptualized financial budget. Lucy swallowed the budget like a seal eating fish. When Briana told Vincent that she was afraid to have children, all was still except for the profanities swirling in his head. Well-played ladies! 08-Apr-2021
The unmentionable couple. His voice makes me put a lock on my ass even though it splits her vagina. Go figure. Alligator dick is making her look like a stupid horny cheerleader. Ryan and Clara. Bottom boy doesn't know how to satisfy a woman. A horny hillbilly doesn't help. Experts need to set up "gay alerts" with butchy lesbians like the Australian version. (It wakes up identity at supreme velocity.) Jacob and Haley. Herman Munster and any strange white woman down the street. Haley needs to stop signing NDAs. Besides a two incher, a fast cummer or an accidental choker, I don't understand the dilemma. Did he confuse the meaning of cunnilingus? Did he make her lick his hairy ass? Did he not wipe? We wanna know. Erik and Virginia. There is no life for her without her drunk fuck buddies. They're lords of her ring. Old daddy showed "wife duly fuck" appreciation by taking her flying. Vincent and Briana. It feels like he's faking it. His insecurities can't solidify love. 24-Mar-2021
The show let the dogs out so Doctora Viviana could pet them. See, she likes animals, just not cats. There was a harrowing moment when Haley's adorable dog was seen judging Viviana but she caught him and gave him stink-eye. The dog magically disappeared. Haley and Jacob. Dude, she's been acting like this ever since you fucked her. There are two types of screams in the world and her aura ain't spelling delighted. 18-Mar-2021

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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15-Apr-2021


Married At First Sight (2014-) Howl

Virginia and Erik. Virginia invited some of her slumber fucks over and they got along swimmingly with Erik. They had so much of one thing in common. Briana and Erik. Big guy, small dick? Clara and Ryan. Ryan invited his ex and significant other. The ex kept smirking uncomfortably. He was embarrassed for his bottom boy. Significant other got paid to cheer. Haley and Jacob. I can see the hate in her eyes whenever anyone casts him in a good light. She's clenching her teeth, screaming "can't you see it!?" I can see it girl! I wouldn't want to birth him a daughter with that nose either. 03-Mar-2021
Virginia and Erik. Why didn't El Pastor ask Virginia if she would give up drinking for a successful marriage when they whisked her away from that party on the beach? Veronica, even children use slumber parties as an excuse to fuck. Erik knows all the answers to a successful relationship. Why is he here with this child? Clara and Ryan. The couple can no longer contain the frozen smiles on their faces. They're melting. She's about to jump out of her skin and bottom pocket has malfunctions. Eek. Briana & Vincent. He doesn't seem genuine. Hailey and Jacob. She hates him. Jacob intimated that all white people are Karens. We no longer have to wonder. Paige. I was hoping to get closure to this catastrophe but no one had the balls. El Pastor came a knocking to have Paige announce to the court that she was not coerced into being a stranger's sex puppet. Maybe she acquiesced because she was assured by experts that it would be safe. If El Pastor wanted to redeem himself, he would have let Paige talk, have Chris listen but not say anything, annul the marriage and tell him to get the fuck off the show. Next week: and the beat goes on. 24-Feb-2021
When a woman tells her husband it's not clicking she's telling him his dick did not make her vagina go clackety clack. She's being nice. Four husbands attempted zipping their wives. Only one succeeded. His dick clicked with her vagina. The other three wives did shut up. BLM attacked the MAF bus. BLM apologized at dinner but Proud boys showed up late and served him raw sushi and steak knives. Boom!

How long are these quacks going to make Paige suffer? 18-Feb-2021
Erik and Virginia. She's high energy, he's a horny old nerd enjoying a young chick. It will kill him, tire him or oops, with the right drug mixture, reenergize him. Vincent and Brianna. I will rub his head as soon he stops pretending he has the answer to everything. Jacob and Haley. Daddy has singe body. Mama wife needs to feel it somewhere in the dark, share it and turn her back on it as soon as he pounces. Ryan and Clara. Ryan is a super pocket daddy. He is super because he's a diamond in the ruff, hung, confident, manly and willing to seem 10 feet tall. I want to play with that piece of art laying across his head. I love it. If she sluts, he's out. Chris and Paige. The Wolf and Little Red Riding Hood. The Wolf's pack/family portrayed a gang rape mentality when discussing The Wolf's bride. Disgusting. They all wanted to bang her big butt like it wasn't attached to a person.

Whomever has the cat must have Viviana visit. She hates them! 01-Feb-2021

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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03-Mar-2021


Married At First Sight (2014-) Howl

The couples served the last pieces of raw skin they had for us to eat. Brett didn't grace anyone with realism. Miles drew satisfaction from a towel job. Executive decision could not determine if her greatest strength came from a man or a woman. I think its a little bit of both. The owl was perched and miffed throughout. Woody overcompsumption makes you sick. Amani is a bro. The mermaid put a spell on me that made me believe everything she said. Am I straight now? The bird is getting some. I can accept the tree bangers likability but I will not tolerate their talent. 30-Oct-2020
Decision day. My favorite bird stopped pecking and I felt bad. The pecking was one of his cutest features. When he twitches I get an uncontrollable desire to hold his face to mine to see if I can calm it. If you need to tighten up for emergencies its all good but please release yourself. It seems painful. I would point out what a plump juicy butt you seem to have but I wouldn't want you to think I'm "gay." Brett understands. Why Brett was never matched with the mermaid is a very good question. The mermaid would have found her voice and the bird and the owl might have flown away together. Was there a mix up? Brett ruined the reunion party by shooting a random bullet into the owl. He got silence from the men, hisses and boos from the women and laughter from Errattic.

I was touched by the friendships the fairytale marriages formed.

(I can't wait until Hades Au replaces a judge next season.) 28-Oct-2020
The bird married the mermaid so he can steal her voice. Surprise! He's Ursula. The bird confided to Woody that the mermaid questioned his sexual identity. Woody's nice guy image didn't crack but his thoughts burst like a spore. "That's it! I get it now. Can't wait to tell Miles." Neither executive decision or Woods participated in the same sex encouragement sessions. I hope they were sleeping and not having sex. The girls didn't understand the mermaid and tree banger couldn't comprehend the bird, at all. Miles and Woody did. By the time Miles semen reaches a hole, the child would have inherited Brad Pitt syndrome from its dryness. The bangers will survive if they can continue to bend the world away from reality and towards frolics with field fairies and lollies or dollies. 15-Oct-2020
Quarantine inhabited their lives and anxiety reached a higher level. The debate for and against baby creation became psychoanalyzed and compromised. The tree banger and his wife appeared the most content but is it because he's so bequeathing? Tree needs to avoid becoming one of Poison Ivy's house plants if he wants to retain his soul. Olivia is the girl that receives a trophy she can never hold onto. "It's like the trophy is coated in grease." It is and his name is Brett the shaggy, nasty smirky, jerky squishmeister and don't you forget it. Karen and Miles. Karen is so dependent on what a man should be that she forgot to question who she is. Woody and Amani put the cute in couple and an exclamation point at the end of their dreams. Sometimes, I feel they are putting us on and other times I say fuck it, I hope its real. Christina and Henry. Gay birds love marrying mermaids. 08-Oct-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Comedy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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30-Oct-2020


90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After Tell All (2020)  Woof

Angela, did you get into a fight? Mrs. Bates is hilarious. Eric acted like he took a course in clowning and failed. Since when does family own individuals? The way people act on social media is how they treat each other at home? Eeek. No one has a free thought. If Michael needs his aunty to teach Angela what he is entitled to, he is not the man for the "babymaking" job. So say the spirits. The host asked Syngin to wave his hair back and forth and I chilled. 07-Oct-2020
Andrei was a cause for American consternation as he declared himself a jigger, a wife, a mother, the household and the man of the house. The Americans reacted like someone took their right to vote away. I would have been much angrier at him if I weren't imagining him motorboating Larissa while Syngin jumped up and down, hair back and forth. Joy. Norman and Mrs. Bates tried to state their case for the normalization of psycho. "She deserved it, she's a money grubbing whore." So was Janet Leigh but she didn't deserve to die. The rocking chair (mother) attempted to stabilize the accusations but Norman was too busy slobbering onto the cameras. It's ok, only fat hags, 12 year olds and stoopid girls got the gist. Eric seemed frustrated that there was no camera under his seat. So was I! Tonya only chimed in when the word psycho or narcissistic was raised. I wasn't looking at Angela's mask, I was looking at the bruises and scratches on her arms. Asuelo is not playing volleyball every day. Nobody likes the sport that much unless you're a coach, an athlete or someone who can hit. He looks like neither. The only thing he's hitting is his dick. 27-Sep-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Chemistry, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Discomfort, Drama, Emasculating, Fun Acting, Funny, Hot Swatch, Hyper, Maddening, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Political, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Silly, Travel, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tough

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07-Oct-2020


90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After? (2016-) Woof

Angela acted up a storm quantifying why she chose dik before mom. Octus ran out of Brazilian opportunists and blamed his mom for his douchery. Mama Bates deduced that Norman must fend for himself and she laughed and laughed. Syngin couldn't figure out if to get fatter or stay home. I'm still fucking Andrei with my eyes closed. Asuelu can't claim to be the head of a tribe if he doesn't provide for it. If he is the chief the mother claims him to be, there would be no money problems because big man would have earned it. Fuck him Kalani. More Eric ass "money shots" and Larissa charms enclosed. 23-Sep-2020
Kalani & Asuelu. Asuelu's family is a condition of suffering and bullshit that Kalani and her children don't need to burden themselves with. Elizabeth & Andrei. He's a monster you greedily fuck but never stare deep at. The wedding was mafia orchestration with lots of pork for meaty man ass and aggressive bulges. Sweet daddy footed the bill and big brother spat indignation. Paul & Karine. I finally understand why he took Karine to the shit chocolate waste factory. He wanted to show her that the worst places in America are still better than her hometown. What a dik. Colt sounds and looks like Octus from Sym-Bionic Titan, has the etiquette of an unwanted hand slider and creepy as fuck. His contempt and desire for women bulldozes their goals. Mother is the beast he can't slay so every woman is fodder. Larissa & Eric. Larissa was knocked out under plastic so Eric enacted a silly skit where it appeared he waited hours (7 mins. tops) but it was just an excuse to watch him pace back and forth. It was all fake worry and new booby play anticipation. Without the charms of Larissa to entertain us the cameraman oddly opted to focus on Eric's sloppy, puffed out and squishy ass print. 14-Sep-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Funny, Insulting, Juvenile, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Squish Alert, Tacky, Travel, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

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23-Sep-2020


Married At First Sight Australia (2015-)  WoofUpgrade

If I weren't still hungry from dinner, I would have puked my brains out. For some reason we need to digest the current season like an antacid. The best liars snatch it, the most compulsive insult it, the most demure destroy it and anyone with a useless dick gets slaughtered. That's all I could devise through the loud Disney orchestra. 18-Sep-2020
Auditions were revealed. Michael has "a type" he likes to torture. Lucky for brunettes (except Hayley) and diversity. Rainbow Connection (Drew) doesn't want to unite with material affection (KC.) Drusilla is less gruesome as a blonde but not as a person. She splintered Thor's hammer. Connie has to be a beneficiary of the Bates Motel. She came on so she can utilize the provided acne treatments that are working marvelously but not endearing her to the hostage. Give Korak a break. He didn't vine through the wilderness to marry Leah Michele. Hades (the expert) left the God clouds to deliver Pandora's box filled with lame curiosities and firecrackers lobbed at Steve. Steve expected Tik Tok and got Yahoo. That's expert quackery. Steve and Korak don't want to offend their women. They want to bestow them a sense of self so when they get dumped they can courageously move on. Not also means no. 10-Sep-2020
Steve finally caved to all the sexual harassment and obliged Mishel with some affection. Daddy bedded her with his little friend Teddy and it was cute. Mishel complained to the girls that he didn't grab anything worth a molestation charge. Male etiquette is to feel up whatever lays next to them. Mishel will regain her powers when she realizes it was her decision to make not his. The surprises were meant to have Michael shit his pants but it looks like he drank them away. New memories forgotten. A marriage nemesis returned. Thank you.

I almost forgot. Korak's mother made him a shirt out of jungle baby diapers. 28-Aug-2020
The experts torched Steve for not grabbing free pussy. It's part of the experiment. Connie broke the couples' hearts by displaying the vulnerabilities that get your partner bullied. Even Michael empathized. When she threw down the Korak imprisonment card, it felt a little psycho. Haha heehee hoho. 27-Aug-2020
Drusilla's family attempted to shove Thor's hammer up his butt but all he did was turn Red Hulk. The couples attempted to stake Drusilla at the fact check dinner for sinking her teeth into everyone's marriage. Korak was chastised yet again for flipping on vines that don't land on Connie. He admitted no attraction to her as his peers snipped at what was left of his dick. Steve was bullied for considering Mishel a friend. If women continue to pressure men about sex, rapey assholes will presume they asked for it. 21-Aug-2020
Oh no. It looks like Steve texted the mafia sexline. Wifey homesteads were a dick shrinking female gangbang, raping hubbies for not reaching a solid woody for their family member. Mike realized Stacey is a Bravo housewife lost on a different channel. Drew took a bullet and admitted how men really feel about botox. All KC wanted was for him to pretend that she was as special as she pretends him to be. The unhealthy connived Thor into getting a unity tattoo. He put it somewhere his future girlfriend wont look. Korak (Tarzan's boy) was held and questioned severely by the Karen squad. Mishel's amazons served the best spread and conducted the most adult conversation. Mama whipped it up and defined it. 20-Aug-2020
Aleks and Ivan scooted before more truth warranted it. Vroom. Vroom.

Thor did a Terminator imitation and brought his hammer to school to show the teaching experts and opinionated students the beautiful but unhealthy bride it slammed.

Jonethen was chastised by the group for complimenting Connie and admitting his willy doesn't want to greet her. The only truth a woman wants to hear is the best lie a man can concoct to make fairytales come true.

KC and Drew. Drew's teddy rainbow collection received support.

Mishel and Steve are the cutest right now. Maybe he can, maybe he will. If they do, please enjoy it. 14-Aug-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fun, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Maddening, Psychological, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Sentimental, Shrill Act, Suspense, Thriller, Tough, World

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18-Sep-2020


Married At First Sight (2014-)  Woof

In order for a woman to sit mightily on her throne, the man she bestows knighthood to must bend at the knee. The effect: with no training or heroes to emulate the men choose to cease and desist (they aint fucking.) The opportunistic molester will always grab and persist but the rest of the men are scared.

Woody does not want to be married to a "warrior woman." Karen is still not attracted to her wife. Tree banger lives in a tiny house and banger wife lives in a tree. Olivia declared that travel is the key to human preeminence. Yes, because that instantaneous joy that recedes upon return will sustain a person during "starvation days." (Maybe if she fucked her husband - before someone else does - it would feel like a trip.) Does the bird really live in a bird house? 26-Aug-2020
The mermaid nosedived as the bird perched steadily on a board in the water. The mermaid tried to fry-cook another wife's bird.

Brett is such a horny man he can fuck his wife. She only gets holidays off. Olivia can expect a future filled with hookers and babies. Brett squirms so much I saw his toilet face. Olivia spoke about her constant need to stay in touch with friends and family. Brett reaches to no one, not mother (esp. not her,) not anyone, except maybe his cat. His reaction to her insistence was a fuck-off to her friends and family followed by a villain grin for the camera. He spent too much time talking to pussy and not real people.

Somebody stepped on piss, all week.

Karen could not accept her husband's mental illness. She had such a perfect childhood. No trauma that would make anyone protest on any street. It's not manly. Only girls and sissies get it. She didn't sign up to marry a woman. When she grouped with the wives, she started slashing into her new "wife" but Banger wife stepped in and interrupted. Lady diva worries too much. The beast will come out as soon as she makes him depressed.

The Bangers. The wife needs to comb her hair as many times as she flosses.

The group session was awkward for the men and resentful for the women. The white husbands squirmed in unison when asked to mathematize their relationships. 19-Aug-2020
I pictured Brett saying "that fucking bitch" before and after every sentence. "I loved that fucking bitch. That fucking bitch cheated on me. I forgave that fucking bitch. That fucking bitch cheated on me again. I hate that fucking bitch. I'm so lucky to be married."

Calling your wife a cougar is just a polite invitation to a bedroom dinner. Karen complained that 10 monogamous relationships was too much for a 26 year old man. I've had ten relationships in one month. No need to worry. It means he meets the demand for 11 women.

Woody's fingers shrunk in the pool as well as some thing in the shower, later. Woody also thought it was cute that the Banger tree swam with his junk out in front of Amani. Weird is the new sex offender.

The mermaid princess hawked her bird into deep waters, environmental waste and wobbly streets. He failed at all of it. When he literally flapped his arms, it made my day. 13-Aug-2020
The mermaid is a pisser and the bird continues to flap involuntarily and very quietly.

The bangers and their respective families are competing to weird us out.

If Brett's face and body moved according to the sound of his voice, I'd believe everything he says.

Woody's mask is hiding the devil inside. 06-Aug-2020
The show has outlined relations for the future.

What a man thinks when he meets a prospective woman:

"Can I fuck her?"

"Will she fuck me?"

"Opinion chatter?"

"She does."

"Business travel!"

Amelia & Bennett. The theory bangers. When the bride spoke with groom besties I envisioned a spontaneous and loving future group dinner. Bennett is a vegan and likes female hairy armpit. I hope she's crispy.

Amani & Woody. His Sammy persona tears. Too much spunk. I thought Amani daddies were a gay couple. Brute gave that boy a death grip. Amani swung her umbrella and his with ease and joy.

Olivia & Brett. He has Dracula Wives for besties and he lost the mojo to an unzip.

Christina & Henry. The shallow mermaid and that bird she's always hanging around with. It's a show for her to put on and him to swallow. Henry's father proclaimed himself eligible for PFLAG by stating that his son is being the sissy boy the present needs him to be. The rest of the family outed him further during their toasts. They pick on everyone. She'll get used to it.

Karen & Miles. Thunder and lightning. What he wants from marriage is a family to lead. When she made him rub her feet he felt so last century. 29-Jul-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Emasculating, Funny, Gay Swatch, Home Improvement, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Twisty, Variety, Warbly, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

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26-Aug-2020


Married At First Sight Australia (2015-) WoofUpgrade

Thor hammered Drusilla (Buffy/Angel) into place. She was the hostess with listening skills.

When women unite its for solidarity when men do is to wreck. If Michael attacks vagina the way he did Aleks I can see why Stacey stayed a bit. For every ball that popped from a man's zipper there was a female clipper on standby. The boys didn't win because their time is never but they broke her enough to make a girl out of her.

Mishel and Steve served some Kanga and it was sort of cute if you're there but cringey watching from home. I entered Steve in the gay freebies league. We hand out exclusive bjs to needy fit seniors, celebrities and straight men. All done by text. (Yes, Michael gets a discount.)

Creep racer used his mates to rev Aleks up but all it did was bring forth how fast or creepy he may be. Whatever the problem, the X marks the same spot. Eek.
 13-Aug-2020
The wives were sideswiped by hubbies, families and friends. Drew, from the rainbow toy collection, arched his back in pride as KC was blasted by his mother monster. The toys exist to entertain his dates. Ivan turned into a creep racer and Aleks woke up. Mishel needs to allow Steve time to switch his sexual identity towards her or not. No more talking. Seb sliced Lizzie's unhealthy appearance which he fixed with a bone rub and a kiss. I can add privileged to Stacey's hub slime. If Jonethen doesn't watch out, he'll accidentally enter Connie because of that foot in his mouth. She doesn't understand. Run. 07-Aug-2020
Mishel could balance on the ladder steadier if she grabbed onto reality. It is hard to live by one mentality when others won't. Men are molded by ego and sex. Daddy Steve from a children's book usurped his power by insinuating his coolness should have indicated to the experts that he deserved a twinkly and less in charge wife. I believe he tried but the email he wrote his willy wouldn't SEND. Hey, I think she's beautiful but I wouldn't sleep with her either. It never would have mattered when he said it, the reaction would have been the same. The rampage was preordained.

I wish they could find a way for Hayley to return. Happily divorced and remarried. There is young love to smash, daddy behemoths to best and she can terrorize the squirmy one with the smashing ring finger. 01-Aug-2020
Future prediction: men and women will isolate from each other until the government lottery calls their # for procreation. The women will raise the girls; the men, the boys. No more raping, violence or in-charge arguments, amongst each other. The gays will gladly step up and be the bitches men want and the mother a boy needs. Mom and dad need to get rid of the fairy tale. Y'all hate each other! 18-Jul-2020
S7E7. It imposes fairytale concoctions on vulnerable beings and grants them the consideration that anyone can get married.

The experts are new age gods matching the expectant with the inexplicable. (I kept seeing nature every time they talked.)

Looks, age, discrepancies and peculiarities don't matter. If you change your outlook, the judgment retires.

People get really seriously brutally honest.

I am spooked, clenched and devoured. 21-Jun-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Abuse, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Camp, Drama, Emasculating, Funny, Gay Swatch, Lesbian, Mean Spirited, No Chemistry, Over the Top, Overcooked, Political, Psychological, Reality, Relationships, Romance, Scary, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Twisty, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

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13-Aug-2020


Love Island Australia (2018-) Arf

I missed the UK version so much that I resorted to this backup. This is a different animal, full of seriousness and ferocity.

The men are cave dwellers and the women, the suppliers that keep toxic men conquering.

If all a woman wants is bigness, handsomeness, grunting and darkness you are forsaking the feminist dream.

The brutality of what each sex stands for baffles me. 29-Jun-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Hot Swatch, Maddening, Psychological, Reality, Relationships, Scary, Squish Alert, Unfunny, Wit Crack

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29-Jun-2020


Siren (2018-) Woof

The sea bursts with trans merms, foreign landers and common ground.

The throuple endangers itself for the esteem of want and need.

Eline Powell stamped her signature on otherworldly and frightening beauty.

An interracial cast that realistically blends.

The mythology holes don't stop me from digging it.

The aqua war delivered an action TV best.

The characters/actors kept me caring.

Bye. 26-Jun-2020
Women own the water that men feed from.

It's an analogy for many things but the message is to respect all life.

Beautiful colors of the universe are united to show us their TV Q.

The daddies are pretty big things, rescuing respectfully and allowing the women, heroism.

The throuple has me banging my head. It's hot, unique, eek and curious.

The mythology is well done, the effects don't suck and my favorite merman is chocolate. 23-Jun-2020
S1E3. I'm getting Kyle XY jitters along with Carrie mermaid spooks. It takes us away from the muck and asks that we be entertained. 16-Jun-2020

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Action, Chemistry, Conspiracy Theory, Creepy, Director's Touch, Drama, From Another Planet, Fun, Hot Swatch, Relationships, Scary, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet Dick Energy, Tough, Writ Tight

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26-Jun-2020




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