TV Posts Tagged as 'Weird'
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Nurse Ratched (2020-)
S1E6. Jennifer Salt excused the dik crammed in Finn's butt to let some of the air out. He performed a beautiful Hitchcock sex scene. Cynthia Nixon demanded respect and got it. Judy Davis giggled. Jon Jon's doctor is a character whose death we are looking forward to. Nurse Dolly needed to remain stupid and fan worshipping to make the crime saga pop. Vincent D'Onofrio Jacked Nurse Ratched with just one word. Paulson's close-up had me holding on to my chair whilst Daddy Ryan felt me up. You motherfucker. 26-Sep-2020
S1E5. Paulson continues to polish her art. Judy Davis steals it by being the most ratched. Cynthia Nixon exudes a mature woman's warmth and dangerous idolatry. Finn Witrock looks yummier but somebody fucked the "it" out of him. I hope its just bad direction. No offense directors. There are beautiful spaces, delightful scenes and a Hitchcock orchestration that makes us swoon but I still don't see what this Ratched has in common with the ultimate Ratched. (I never imagined ultimate Nurse Ratched being "cute" in her youth.) 24-Sep-2020
It's not really Nurse Ratched it's more like a dichotomy of the Atelier lesbian Playstation game series. Rorona, Sophie and Atelier Esha are some of my favorites. It was always the same character with a surgically unblemished witch. That's what I need to tell myself to accept the sumptuous surroundings and the opulent cast. It's been prettified, sensationalized and horrified. I was impressed by the first episode and confused by the second. Is Nurse Ratched supposed to smirk at the camera? Nurse Ratched is a horror not a horror film. Is women empowerment a threat? Do we report it? Sarah Paulson serves it elegantly, poisonous and charmed. Judy Davis flambeid, Finn Wittrock dislocated himself, the eye of Murphy distracts but it also expands and disintegration occurs. The Hitchcock tunes are seductive. Change her name and we might be cool. Nurse Karen? 21-Sep-2020
Married At First Sight (2014-)
The experts supplied the duos with the "Know You" quiz I invented five years ago and we got to know them better. Women are going to have to decide if the switch of power is suitable for male/female relationship success. Men are displaying feelings, getting insecurities, are depressed and vagina does not like it. They've become sensitive mothers with no wombs. They wont dare go near one unless she writes "yes, please!" on their chests. Woody transmitted porn vibrations and a hurtful soul. Amani played along with him. They discussed getting a dog with Woods not wanting one and Amani demanding one. Same solution as with the kids. She gets a dog and the kids get smacked every time they don't pick up after it. Scuttle opened up to the ocean and the mermaid and she tail thrashed him. I felt bad for him. It's not her fault either. Everyone deserves to get who they want. The mismatch almost seems like a producer in-joke. Olivia called out Brett's sarcastic look, talk and breath. She "officially" proclaimed he was Jekyll in front of the camera and Hyde behind it. He answered every question like a male escort, drank a shark drink like it was real and ate his taco like it was Olivia. Karen's constant belittling of Miles sexuality makes it seem she needs to check her own. Miles sperm dried up when the expert suggested they take sex off the table. Dude, run! The expert's disdain for cats was a detail I wished I'd miss. After it attacked her she shooshed it away real polite and ratched. Banger wife re-attached a friend's finger after the Tree accidentally cut it off. I hope she flossed before the operation. Safety first. 24-Sep-2020
Daily routines were observed and only sarcasm relayed the truth. Amani spits toothpaste onto your hair. Woody awakens like a senior and avoids the night like a feeble. Olivia startles awake and Brett arises perfect. Tree Banger coyly called out wifey for a lack of cleanliness but she didn't bite. She's the breadwinner and he is the service. Case closed. The mermaid princess got together with another couple and ate Sebastian's grandchildren. Scuttle (the bird) spent half the time standing and perching. Amani attempted to have Scuttle confide in her but besides babbling about how impatience scares him, there wasn't much for Amani to capture from birdspeak. The princess was not amused that he thought her rude to her subjects. The bird, who never talks, complained about her lack of communication. They rethought things and decided the attention and cha-ching that may follow will be worth the marriage. To my chagrin Scuttle compared himself to a turtle. I blurted, "really?" His face twitches 50 times before a turtle blinks and are the feathers there to hide his shell? Brett attracted gay woodies at a rock climbing event then played "Trivia" at a bar with Olivia and her friends. The questions went over his head, he became surly and uncooperative exclaiming that what they were playing wasn't trivia. Wife was overcome with weakness, stepped out and had a meaningless conversation with her friend about how he doesn't want to be a part of them. I was team Brett all the way. The game was shit and the friends were condescending. Woody and Amani discussed child whipping. She was against it and he was raised with it. Of course, he acquiesced but thought...fuck it, a slap and a threat when she's not around, they won't tell. Executive decision yelled rape with a but. I have no understanding of her type. By proclaiming to be so empowered she has become the weakest bride. If you need to pay someone to show you what closeness is, you're a robot. Let the daddy loose or fuck his brains out. You only live once. 17-Sep-2020
Hollywood dating was in effect. Karen and Miles went food shopping. I would have picked up Popeyes before heading home just to annoy her. Executive Decision (Karen) declared foul once again. She can't deal being matched with a girl. What kind of bulls are in this woman's life? Daddy just wants some bear hugs, teet tweaks, a yank and maybe a pull. As soon as daddy put his sex foot forward, she yelled rape. She's not suitable for human contact. The Bangers went slacklining. I would have pulled out my scissors and cut the line but this couple is about celebrating every stupid little thing. The banana tree broke peer sex pressure and popped the wife which lent him "I can do better" arrogance as he regaled her for being unkempt and undutiful. He also chose space instead of her. That'll teach her not to clean the bathroom. The bird taught aquatic maiden to golf and a human tried teaching them to dance. I wondered if his head whips spontaneously back and forth during oral service. Olivia and Brett went on a Republican alligator expedition. Brett was especially upset when he realized there'd be no alligators attacking the boat or his wife. Stupid and funny reactions were enabled with an addendum stating Brett would be honored to push his wife out of a plane. 09-Sep-2020
The couples prepared for company. Brett called Pastor Cal a dik and went missing for hours. Next day he returned to celebrate his marriage to a nurse practitioner with free access to drugs. Party time. Brett compared his wife to Nurse Jackie and gossiped to his friends that there was a lot of big dick in Mexico. The Bangers played house. Tree Banger rocked some jack-o-lantern cotton as his head made a great wick. The aquatic princess couldn't think of a favorite childhood food even though she's a mermaid and was cooking fish. The Dracula wives made a return to authenticate that their bff was the best victim a woman could ask for - without the sex part. Karen softened to the idea of their being some Perry in Madea. The village partiers "sex bashed" the men that weren't measuring up. The chants in favor of rape were horrific. Do you want him to pull your hair? Yes, that would be nice. Choking. If he knows the safe word, yes. Will you let him say the first word? Absolutely! Can you beg to push things along? Absolutely fucking not, I'm still a woman. Rape. 02-Sep-2020
90 Day Fiance: Couples Tell All (2019)
The word soulmate has been destroyed for me. Why does anyone think that another soul can be connected to you for eternity but not death. Tania is the female empowerment culled from watching too much Nick sitcoms and Jane The Virgin. Syngin needs to squish right out of there before he turns to squash. Anny. He's looting your ass. Mamita tell the grandmother you want a job in porn. Too bad for the cute kid. Juliana & Michael. I hope to see the Lifetime version of how it went down ten years later. Lesbian Ex Killers... Fuck 'em attitude all the way. Emily & Sasha. Girl, he fucked me at the gym. Good luck not reaching for them cookies. Jasmin is so ravenous that she turned Blake's eyes blue. Anna & Mursel. I can't tell if it's genuine but her son Joey isn't opposed to the marriage because he lost control of the household it's because he really thinks something is afoot and mama ignored it. The psychology is outdated. Mike & Natalie. Natalie is calling bullshit on the process by establishing that there is more than one reason to get a green card, she' just being brutally honest about the demands. Nice men always follow bad boys by giving everything but pleasure. Mike & Juliana. Walking on broken glass. Michael & Angela. Angela is the aggressor that will lead you out of danger. Her hopes and dreams are so gigantic that she almost makes it seem possible. She deserves to get herself some. Angela, the buffoons have been cursed. Wink, Wink. Twitch. Kaboom! 30-Aug-2020
Married At First Sight (2014-)
In order for a woman to sit mightily on her throne, the man she bestows knighthood to must bend at the knee. The effect: with no training or heroes to emulate the men choose to cease and desist (they aint fucking.) The opportunistic molester will always grab and persist but the rest of the men are scared.
Woody does not want to be married to a "warrior woman." Karen is still not attracted to her wife. Tree banger lives in a tiny house and banger wife lives in a tree. Olivia declared that travel is the key to human preeminence. Yes, because that instantaneous joy that recedes upon return will sustain a person during "starvation days." (Maybe if she fucked her husband - before someone else does - it would feel like a trip.) Does the bird really live in a bird house? 26-Aug-2020
The mermaid nosedived as the bird perched steadily on a board in the water. The mermaid tried to fry-cook another wife's bird.
Brett is such a horny man he can fuck his wife. She only gets holidays off. Olivia can expect a future filled with hookers and babies. Brett squirms so much I saw his toilet face. Olivia spoke about her constant need to stay in touch with friends and family. Brett reaches to no one, not mother (esp. not her,) not anyone, except maybe his cat. His reaction to her insistence was a fuck-off to her friends and family followed by a villain grin for the camera. He spent too much time talking to pussy and not real people.
Somebody stepped on piss, all week.
Karen could not accept her husband's mental illness. She had such a perfect childhood. No trauma that would make anyone protest on any street. It's not manly. Only girls and sissies get it. She didn't sign up to marry a woman. When she grouped with the wives, she started slashing into her new "wife" but Banger wife stepped in and interrupted. Lady diva worries too much. The beast will come out as soon as she makes him depressed.
The Bangers. The wife needs to comb her hair as many times as she flosses.
The group session was awkward for the men and resentful for the women. The white husbands squirmed in unison when asked to mathematize their relationships. 19-Aug-2020
I pictured Brett saying "that fucking bitch" before and after every sentence. "I loved that fucking bitch. That fucking bitch cheated on me. I forgave that fucking bitch. That fucking bitch cheated on me again. I hate that fucking bitch. I'm so lucky to be married."
Calling your wife a cougar is just a polite invitation to a bedroom dinner. Karen complained that 10 monogamous relationships was too much for a 26 year old man. I've had ten relationships in one month. No need to worry. It means he meets the demand for 11 women.
Woody's fingers shrunk in the pool as well as some thing in the shower, later. Woody also thought it was cute that the Banger tree swam with his junk out in front of Amani. Weird is the new sex offender.
The mermaid princess hawked her bird into deep waters, environmental waste and wobbly streets. He failed at all of it. When he literally flapped his arms, it made my day. 13-Aug-2020
The mermaid is a pisser and the bird continues to flap involuntarily and very quietly.
The bangers and their respective families are competing to weird us out.
If Brett's face and body moved according to the sound of his voice, I'd believe everything he says.
Woody's mask is hiding the devil inside. 06-Aug-2020
The show has outlined relations for the future.
What a man thinks when he meets a prospective woman:
"Can I fuck her?"
"Will she fuck me?"
Amelia & Bennett. The theory bangers. When the bride spoke with groom besties I envisioned a spontaneous and loving future group dinner. Bennett is a vegan and likes female hairy armpit. I hope she's crispy.
Amani & Woody. His Sammy persona tears. Too much spunk. I thought Amani daddies were a gay couple. Brute gave that boy a death grip. Amani swung her umbrella and his with ease and joy.
Olivia & Brett. He has Dracula Wives for besties and he lost the mojo to an unzip.
Christina & Henry. The shallow mermaid and that bird she's always hanging around with. It's a show for her to put on and him to swallow. Henry's father proclaimed himself eligible for PFLAG by stating that his son is being the sissy boy the present needs him to be. The rest of the family outed him further during their toasts. They pick on everyone. She'll get used to it.
Karen & Miles. Thunder and lightning. What he wants from marriage is a family to lead. When she made him rub her feet he felt so last century. 29-Jul-2020
90 Day Fiance: The Other Way (2019-)
Ariela's mother was made to eat raw meat combined with butter. I'm astounded she made it to the club to watch her future in-law scam gyrate with his ex.
Melyza's mother also noticed Tim got fat and slipped him the evil eye for cheating.
Jihoon pulled out the mama money card to keep his meal ticket beside. 04-Aug-2020
American gay antennae does not understand why the land of twinks is rife with uncleanliness and lack of public affection. Hate is why and violent death is how. In America I'd give the pro the benefit of the doubt. I wouldn't want anyone to know I was with him either.
Brittany is practicing Dr. Phil in the land of I Hate Women. No man is that extraordinary and no woman is that much man.
Jenny and Sumit are comic relief. She's in need and he aint helping.
Ariela, 28 and Biniyam, 29 = 0 life.
American mothers are very knowledgeable and kickass but they refuse to convince their children that they are making cataclysmic mistakes.
Did Melyza reject Tim because he got fat?
Deavan and Jihoon. We will never see the end of this fight because he swindled her and korean mother is ferocious. 28-Jul-2020
Brittany doth protest too much. Her five minutes turned into a cruel reality that was subsided by fake fantasy dick. Brittany needs to leave, ASAP. Her disrespect has been hampered by a jedi and his force. She flaunts a grand lie like an unnecessary representative.
Mother korean needs to talk to my mother to succently fulfill preposterous male/female resolutions.
The gays were quick to cash-in on their purchase. Somebody got to pay the rent and the other got latin twink ass. Woohoo!
Karens go international!
Karens are not racists! Horny maybe but not racist. It's a control thing.
If a woman tingles for the whiff of fraud, disrespect and an unidentified violent force, they don't deserve to be in charge.
I could quack on the gays but no lessons would be learned. Papa popped is latching onto the last gulp of youth that American twinks have deprived him. Even if it breaks his bank, his spirit and mental health, he will lap the boy in luxury like the classic fairy tales that ensnared women. "Even if I destroy his spirit, my desire for reciprocation is required because I'm an American! The contract is void when I tire of him or if he fucks my friends. No, he has no say. I request that he please show appreciation during any social media interactions regarding my leadership or I will rescind all positive recommendations." Mexican never sees family again. Humbug! (Kidding)
Why do women expect men to change but turn hostile when asked to reciprocate?
Muslim woman slammed that girl to the ground! (They say they they have no power.)
The idiocy hurts me.
It's all about control. They all have dwindling assets they need to cash in before their reality becomes dire. It's scary, demented and addictive. For the burden's sake, I hope a lot of it is fake. 04-Sep-2019
Summer House (2017-)
Every party is a cleanse for every dream that wont come true. 07-May-2020
Truth party games. Wow, they really work.
The girls are friends again until the next bout of horniness trumps it. 01-May-2020
The green giant has sexual dysfunction and old people getting it on, is sick. 23-Apr-2020
Had no idea there was clamor for more. It's back to the future where we get to see grandpappy hook-ups in real time. "Me too" is a charity, feminine wiles are an exaltation, closets are for sex not coming out, women love big things, men are horny and crass mugs that only hold intelligent conversations whilst on the hunt and remain stupid after they fox it. I have no idea what they represent but my generation is enthralled and disturbed. 13-Mar-2020
A band-aid of happy endings. 29-Jul-2019
The gay got replaced by a floaty and a scary virgin. The elders are not aging gracefully and the show has gone from being my chore radio to white noise. When you watch reality TV you get to experience the damage our parents wrought. 23-Jul-2019
- Supreme Ken Doll (Kyle) needs to explore why he prefers living in a blur
- Waiting is a virtue (Amanda) - only if you know what you're waiting for
- Lindsay realized that change only happens when you apply it to yourself. Good for her
- The salt (Danielle) was overtaken by hot peppers (twins)
- The inactive (Stephen) needs to divert his hostility towards his parents. They are the reason he can't move forward
- The blistering giant's (Carl) self awareness allows him to take from life easily 19-Jul-2019
In season two they added salt to mild, endowed the gay with a bitch rap and the desperation from separation (relationships/careers) was dialed up a notch. Stephen needs to accept his het counterpart like he'd like to be. If he's really a friend he would appreciate Carl's flamboyance and his disregard for what people think of him. Hotness attracts men. Hot shit spills over. Unless you only have eyes for him...that's a different problem. 15-Jul-2019
It does stereotype well. Twins are still annoying, blondes are vacant, the gay needs an apron, the ex-fatboy is out for revenge and the women still have no clue what's flashing in a man's face. The man knows. Mind boggling. I may become obsessed by it or immune. 12-Jul-2019
Normal People (2020-)
I quit after two episodes for its robotic love story and for making a half, feel like a full hour. If its purpose is to instruct us on how to navigate teen angst, sex and love, I can't empathize. By twelve, I and most of my brethren were already bona fide sluts (thanks, daddies) and my input wasn't necessary. It reeks of social parenting, enforcement and naive privilege. The writers believe that if you preach hard enough, it will spill into reality. Daisy Edgar-Jones is neither ugly, weirdly or enticing enough to elaborate on an inconsistent sketch of a girl who is written to be all of those things. It's hypocritical. Paul Mescal is wasting his beautiful ass, nobody else matters and nothing happens. 05-May-2020
Too Hot To Handle (2020-)
No sex games, stripper parties or porn stars performing anatomy tricks. No Casa De Amor with an hour free of rules to tempt anyone. A lame exercise in controlling the libido does not a better date candidate make and I have no idea what point it's trying to make. (The winner takes home about $12.00 after taxes.) 19-Apr-2020
The norm is hornier than I thought. Love Island Castaways land on Mt. Celibacy and are tortured into going straight. The women are boob jocks and the men prance around blowing bro bubbles. The understanding is that what an independent woman wants, is a servant. It's not daring or tacky, not willing to titillate on a channel that permits it and not willing to locate a winning politic. "Tom Holland future" is an eerie panty shredder, women are still reaching for the biggest/complicated things, unruly racism is itching closer to our faces and Jesus left because he couldn't stand them. 18-Apr-2020
Love Island (UK) (2015-)
Men have invented a new derogatory language to upset women. What now? We can't ban every word... or can we? Nobody mentioned french toast, its the best (any foreigner with sweet tasting d...) 22-Feb-2020
Contestants get paid to be inappropriate to strangers. 16-Feb-2020
I misinterpreted its existence. We are judging cave dwellers hooking up in a modern habitat. Skinny jeans, man pillows, wrangling, snogging, heart rips, musical accents and an errattic ear...that's entertainment. It's a braincation. 16-Feb-2020
Boring in any language. 25-Aug-2019
Below Deck Reunion (2020)
Andy squished, Kate demurred, Simone pondered, Lee combatted, Courtney intellectualized, Riley teetered, Abby could care less and the rest of the Avengers allowed the incredible Hulk to talk for them. (Captain walking out to get legal counsel was cowboy.) 18-Feb-2020
Horse Girl (2020)
The title sets it up for failure. Mare straddles insanity via conspiracy theory, almost every character is hypocritical and alienating and the balance of insanity versus sanity is insane. (Hint: the horse wins!) 15-Feb-2020
Stranger, The (2020)
The wows were cross-stitched to perfection. 05-Feb-2020
I'm only two episodes in but I think it's about a future where snitching trends...like, "save the world" kind of..."trendy." I'm intrigued. 02-Feb-2020
In The Tall Grass (2019)
What kills most of King's cinematic depictions is how mumble and jumble detract from realistic scares. 22-Jan-2020
The Transylvanian brogue keeps the flies and the viewers away. I was not going to spend more than three hours listening to it. 13-Jan-2020
Velvet Buzzsaw (2019)
An expose of the art world with a horror addendum. It spends too much time characterizing a patronizing society and very little imagination bringing the art and kills to life. Jake wraps his character in queer banality and sexual confusion like the problematic characters of yore (Jodie Dallas from Soap and Steven Carrington from Dynasty.) I'm starting to believe he actually may be straight. 20-Nov-2019