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In gayspeak, does LTR mean overnight or weekend stay? 24-Oct-2019
Almost Half of Gay Male Couples Experience Intimate Partner Violence, Study Says
This latest study deepens that existing knowledge with surprising results. After asking both members of couples surveyed whether they experienced violence, researchers were surprised to find that there was very little agreement between partners. Study participants were more likely to report perpetration than victimization.
"My hunch is that it's to do with concepts of masculinity,” says Dr. Stephenson. “It's [perceived as] more masculine to say that you beat someone than that somebody beat you.”
The study also measured internalized homophobia, using a method known as the Gay Identity Scale. Men who had negative feelings about their sexuality were more likely to experience or perpetrate IPV.
It’s difficult to say exactly why this is without further research, Dr. Stephenson notes, although he has some hunches. “We know that violence is often a stress response behavior,” he says. “What I'm finding through studies with male couples is in addition to stresses like unemployment, there's additional stress of being gay. They could be exteral, like experiencing homophobia, or it could be an internal struggle. … There are very few media representations of male couples and we're constantly being told that same sex couples are wrong. … If you don't have the right nurturing environment, it can make you worry about your own sexuality.”
That matches previous research indicating that IPV is more common among people who have themselves been victims of homophobic violence. It’s also more prevalent among whose attitudes about masculinity conformed to what a 2016 study referred to as “struggling to be the alpha.”
Emotional intimate partner violence experienced by men in same-sex relationships
Gay dating apps Grindr and Romeo can expose user locations, leaving men vunerable to hate crimes
Several of the most popular gay dating apps have flaws that allow their users’ exact locations to be determined, the BBC reports. Researchers from the cyber-security company Pen Test Partners found the flaws in the Grindr, Recon, and Romeo apps.
All of those apps allow users to share their general location by displaying their distance from each other. But while that location information only reveals distance from another user’s current location and not direction, the researchers found anyone with basic computing skills could use that information to determine another user’s exact location using a method known as trilateration. Here’s how the BBC describes the method:
Your taste in music could be ruining your relationship
Here are some highlights from the survey:
* Nearly 1 in 5 people wouldn’t date someone with “bad” taste in music.
* Only 46% of women and 54% of men would date someone with music tastes they’d consider “bad”
* Men believe hip-hop is the most unattractive genre (45%), while women find heavy metal the most unattractive (37%). The most attractive genre for men: classic rock (41%); for women: hip-hop (39%)
We speak to the gay men who pretended to be girls online to flirt with boys
Growing up in the closet can be an isolating experience. So, in the early days of social media, it’s little surprise that some gay men resorted to unorthodox methods to explore their attraction to other boys.
Thomas* is one of them. As a closeted teenager, he used to “catfish” boys by pretending to be a girl online. “I was really desperate and lonely,” he says, telling me that early social media sites such as Bebo were where he started this behaviour. “I’d add them over MSN Messenger and flirt. It was a thrill at the time, I guess, though I’m really ashamed of it now.”
Thomas says he was mostly interested in talking, but the boys he catfished would usually turn the conversation sexual. “It wouldn’t take long for the horny straight boys to ask for nude photos,” he says. “But I initially just wanted an outlet to talk to cute boys because I couldn’t. While all my friends were getting off with each other and going out, I just wanted someone to talk to me in the same way.”
Straight Men Recall the First Time They Were Attracted to a Trans Woman
Tons of men are into trans girls, they just don't admit it.
This secrecy means that many men who are attracted to trans women end up living a lie. And in the worst cases, that lie boils over into anger and violence towards trans women for putting their masculinity on the line. But there are cis, straight men who are working to break this silence. I spoke to four of them—across generations—about how they grapple with the taboo around loving trans women.
Chris, 57, is a white businessman and a male escort on the side; Troy, 55, is a Black father, grandfather, and Financial Services professional; Joel, 37, is a Black Information Systems Analyst; and Jeremy, 20, is a Black college student from New York City.
Guy dumps lover by leaving his sex toy in gym toilet
Photos shared on Twitter this weekend suggest a man ditched his lover, Justin, by leaving his cock ring and a note in a gym toilet.
‘Justin I’m sorry there’s some bad news waiting for you in the rooftop bathroom of Vida Fitness’ Twitter user Sean Keady wrote on 6 July.
He shared photos of a note and a package he found on top of a cubicle at his gym.
Gay Star News
Gay men are signing up for Hinge in droves because of Pete Buttigieg
For six years, Chelsea resident Michael Crawford worked for Freedom To Marry, the campaign to make gay marriage legal nationwide. It passed in 2015, but Crawford himself remained single.
“I had been looking, but not looking,” Crawford, now the culture director at Moveon.org, told The Post of his love life. “I kind of lost hope.”
But Crawford changed his mind after openly gay Democratic presidential hopeful Pete Buttigieg, 37, and his school-teacher husband Chasten, 30, burst onto the national scene this year.
“After reading about Mayor Pete and Chasten, I realized that it’s finally time for me. They are the most visible gay couple out there, and they’re adorable. I heard they met on [dating app] Hinge so I downloaded it,” said Crawford, who is in his late 40s and became a Hinge member in late June.
He’s not the only gay man who has recently signed up after being charmed by the Buttigiegs’ fairy tale.
Gay Hookup App Must Pay $240,000 For Leaving Private Photos Exposed
After leaving users’ private photos exposed for more than a year, the gay dating and hookup app Jack’d has to pay out, literally. The app’s owner Online Buddies has agreed to cough up $240,000 in a settlement with the New York attorney’s office for their negligence with the sensitive data of 7,000 New York users.
As Out reported in February, Jack’d updated the app to close the loophole discovered by cybersecurity researcher Oliver Hough that allowed people to access supposedly private photos uploaded to Jack’d. While reports, at the time said that Hough had emailed Jack’d three months prior, he revealed to Out via screenshots that the emails dated back a year. Jack’d and Online Buddies did not take any action until after Hough went to the press. British tabloid The Register first broke the story.
When my ex fell in love again, I stalked his new relationship online for a year
I remember feeling weightless leaving the apartment of my ex, knowing it would be the last time.
I remember texting a friend asking if I could come over to talk. Calling my dad to wish him a belated happy birthday, and being so in shock about the breakup that I pretended I was OK.
After almost two years of fighting for the love of my life, I couldn’t fathom him being gone.
I blocked my ex at first, along with most of his friends and family. I even mustered the strength to throw out our mementos. Delete texts, pictures. But a couple weeks later, he popped up in his roommate’s Snapchat story.
It was Ricardo’s birthday party (fake name), a friend who my ex’s roommate introduced us to at Pride the month before. My ex, Ricardo, and I had hung out as a group and had a great time. But this Snapchat of them leaning their heads together with carefree smiles caught me off-guard. I reassured myself it was nothing, just friends taking a drunken picture.
Gay Star News
Bisexual actor Tyler Blackburn reveals he's dating an 'amazing' guy
Have We Met Before? reflects on how looking for gay sex has changed
Danger. Danger and excitement have been two factors I’ve most noticed the mention of, in terms of how looking for and having gay sex has changed across the last 50 years.
Several straight friends on viewing the film came away sympathetic and concerned for this dangerous lived experience. The fear of being caught, of being arrested or losing your job back in the day.
How uncertain a connection with a new person can be right up until the moment of reveal. Are they going to beat me up or make out with me?
Gay Star News
Third Dallas man charged after gay men targeted on app
A third Dallas man has been charged with federal hate crimes in connection with a string of kidnappings and robberies in 2017 that targeted gay men lured to an apartment from posts on a dating app.
Court records show that Daryl Henry, 22, is charged with nine counts, including conspiracy to commit hate crimes, kidnapping and carjacking, according to The Dallas Morning News. Henry pleaded not guilty on Tuesday, and a judge ordered him held without bond pending trial.
Investigators said Henry guarded the victims after they were kidnapped. His attorney said Henry hasn't committed any violent crimes and had asked that he be released on bond. If convicted, Henry could face up to life in prison, according to prosecutors.
The federal indictment said the defendants used the gay dating app Grindr to create fake profiles and "pose as gay men interested in 'dates' to lure gay men." Once the victims arrived, the suspects forced them into the Dallas apartment.
Homophobic assault leaves 22-year-old in near vegetative state
Grindr horror: Men abducted, robbed and assaulted in Dallas
Transgender woman decapited in Veracruz, head place in front of town hall
Gay men reveal the fetishes they don't want others to know about
Gay men have revealed the fetishes they don’t want others to know about.
XTube surveyed their users to determine and rank which fetishes they get turned most on by.
The winner was ‘partialism’, also known as a fetish for a particular part of the body. This could be anything from feet to a hairy chest.
Role play was second on the list, while narratophilia (or dirty talk) was third on the list.
The answers was collected from over 3,000 gay or bisexual men over the age of 18.
Gay Star News
Lesbian dating apps and sites for queer women and non-binary people
Yeah, yeah, dating apps are veritable cess pits of human garbage, I know - and that's if you can actually get replies from people. But when you're lesbian, bisexual, queer, trans, non-binary, pansexual, any LGBTQIA+ identity, dating apps can connect you to people you might not encounter in your day to day life. And they can be a goddam lifeline.
Of course, most dating apps aren't build with us lot in mind. Nope, they're mainly for the straights. So, shortly after becoming single, I took it upon myself to test a variety of queer-specific and mainstream dating apps to see just how good they are for LGBTQ+ people. For context: I am a cis woman, and was up for dating people of all gender identities.
PS: Eight months later, I have a legend of a girlfriend who I met on one of these apps (but probably not the one you'd think...) during this experiment. Thanks journalism, thanks Cosmo you bloody matchmaker, I owe it all to you.