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All Posts Tagged as 'Art Devoid'

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Creep (2014) Whimper

I don't do well with first-person because its film rolling on inanimate objects (people included) that are restricted. A fantastic one connects what we see with what we imagine. A disappointing one makes a straight beeline across a rudimentary device. The creep in question is just an exasperating real estate agent with constant jabber and little realization. The one behind the camera could have offset the other's nonsense with the snappy quips his screams intimated. The axe received the most character development. The "s" word comes to mind but I refuse to use it. 01-Apr-2020

Tags: 1st Person, 2010s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Daddy Squish, Dialogue Lament, Ear Prick, Grating, Horror, Inactivity, Oncer, Over the Top, Predictable, Revenge, Silly, Tedium, Timid

Filed under: Movies

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01-Apr-2020


All Of Me (1984) Whimper

Instead of a body switch Mr. Reiner chose partial possession which is one of the most improbable storylines attempted ever. We want no change in anything but the story. The pros (Martin and Tomlin) don't embarrass easily because it makes sense that great comedy training includes stupidity. Martin freights most of it and freewheels in an agitated state that unnerves us but never hinders us from lapping up his star charm. Lily didn't feel like an equal because she was stuck in a mirror for most of it but her adorable cheekiness and one liners hit. The dance was still cute. 25-Mar-2020

Tags: 1980s, Art Devoid, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Chemistry, Comedy, Daddy Squish, Drama, Elegance, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Fatigue, Funny, Good Acting, Magnetism, Music Swings, Over the Top, Preposterous, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

Filed under: Movies

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25-Mar-2020


Grave Of The Vampire (1972) Whimper

Silliness about a resurrected vamp raping a mod chick that dies delivering his baby. The baby ages into a superhero hunk with little gift of gab and limited supernatural powers. The fair lady hired to scream, couldn't. Fast forward to the fight scene which has Thor mashing a tired Michael Morbius with no effects and generating loads of laughs. 24-Mar-2020

Tags: 1970s, Accidental Watch, Art Devoid, Cold, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fantasy, Funny, Sort of, Horror, Hot Swatch, Inactivity, Political Satire, Preposterous, Silly, Tedium, Timid, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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24-Mar-2020


Mausoleum (1983) Woof

Piece of shit about a Charlie's angel being possessed by a spiteful demon. The spiteful demon is a woman that accepts no bullshit from a man and punishes him for it. As she hurts no one but, I see no reason to destroy her. She's today's woman. When Bobbie Bresee's Playboy playmate regresses to her childhood trauma like Sally Field in "Sybil," it was brilliant hilarity. LaWanda Page was hilarious. A lot of the film is hilarious and ridiculous and preposterous. It's a piece of shit that entertains.

A cleanup might do it good. 13-Mar-2020

Tags: 1980s, Accidental Watch, Action Stomper, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Crapfun, Creepy, Director's Touch, Drama, Elegance, Enthusiastic, Funny, Good Acting, Gory, Horror, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Political Satire, Revenge, Sentimental, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Twisty, Words Spoke

Filed under: Movies

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13-Mar-2020


Once Upon A Time... In Hollywood (2019) Whimper

I no longer squirt for QT unhinged idiosyncrasies. Talky, boring and pointless. 23-Feb-2020

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Director Insanity, Drama, Fatigue, Grating, Inactivity, Over the Top, Porn Violence, Preposterous, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Tedium, Timid, Vague, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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23-Feb-2020


Midnight Movie: The Killer Cut (2008) Whimper

In order for a viewer to digest mumbo jumbo we need to be privy to the rules. The film concocts it and we decide if it is within the realm of possibility so we can view the art piece with tolerance. No rules were established and the filmmaker refused to reserve a coherent explanation. It was remastered to look sharper but not sound brighter. 03-Feb-2020

Tags: 2000s, 2020s, Art Devoid, By the Numbers, Camp, Corn, Director Slouch, Fatigue, Indecipherable, Musical Bombast, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Scare Obvious, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Timid, Vague, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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03-Feb-2020


Beyond The Door (1974) Bites

Trying to recreate the horror of The Exorcist on a scaled budget and via a disorderly presentation. The soul music was vibing but out of place. The shocks consisted of kids swearing, getting buckled and mama make outs. Juliet Mills succeeded wiping out sweet "Nanny and the Professor" memories and replacing them with disturbing ones. It had some effective scares that would have triggered had they been taken seriously. 29-Jan-2020

Tags: 1970s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Ear Prick, Fatigue, Funny, Horror, Music Swings, Oncer, Over the Top, Preposterous, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, TV-like, Weird, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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29-Jan-2020


Saturn 5 (1980) Bites

It literally reads, even in space, the Goldigger gets what she wants. The age difference is astronomical which sends charisma out the window. It probably would have played better with a spouse of equal experience. Farrah hadn't received her acting wings yet but she comes to life when she's experiencing pain (screaming, crying and panicking.) The robot is unfinished and ridiculous, the sets are TV comparable and the idea is no longer beneficial. 24-Jan-2020

Tags: 1980s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Music Swings, Preposterous, SciFi, Unenthusiastic, Weird, Writer Humiliation

Filed under: Movies

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24-Jan-2020


Bumblebee (2018) Whimper

We watch for the shiny new tech (even if it appears unfinished.) 09-Jan-2020

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, By the Numbers, Camp, Comic Book, Corn, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, SciFi, Shrill Act, Silly, Stink Wigs, Timid, Writer Humiliation

Filed under: Movies

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09-Jan-2020


Invaders From Mars (1986) Bites

Tobe and company add too much silliness to the story, the aliens look like ugly toys you win for free and the only alien needed was underutilized (Louise Fletcher.) She knows scary. 31-Dec-2019

Tags: 1980s, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Conspiracy Theory, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Drama, Ear Prick, Fatigue, Over the Top, Political Satire, Predictable, Remake, Repetitive, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Timid, TV-like, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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31-Dec-2019


Christmas Survival (2018) BitesEarly Exit

I could only survive 15 minutes. 08-Dec-2019

Tags: 2010s, Art Devoid, Brutal, Camp, Comedy, Ear Prick, Early Exit, Holiday, Over the Top, Preposterous, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Unfunny, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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08-Dec-2019


You Better Watch Out/Christmas Evil (1980) Whimper

Insanity celebrates Christmas. The film attempts to psychoanalyze our hero but the construction is not mentally capable. 07-Nov-2019

Tags: 1980s, Accidental Watch, Art Devoid, Camp, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Good Acting, Horror, Over the Top, Political Satire, Preposterous, Silly, Star Watt, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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07-Nov-2019


Glass (2018) Whimper

McAvoy is body jacked but his interpretive personalities are TMI agony. The film utters comic book lore without smashing any of it. M. Knight was so obsessed with exercising a singular idea (superhero or not) that the film contains no vibrant standpoint. My foundation remained unrooted. 23-Oct-2019

Tags: 2010s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Brutal, Camp, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Disappointment, Drama, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Indecipherable, Over the Top, Silly, Suspense

Filed under: Movies

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23-Oct-2019


Supergirl (1984) No MoonsEarly Exit

It thought Three Stooges hilarity could save it. Helen Slater, her costume and her hair legitimizes it and Bochner doesn't hurt but everything else is bargain basement. I quit it because I didn't feel like falling asleep for a third time. Nobody cared. 12-Oct-2019

Tags: 1980s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, Camp, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Director Slouch, Ear Prick, Early Exit, False Action, Fatigue, Hot Swatch, Manipulation, Oncer, Over the Top, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Sad Effects, Shrill Act, Silly, Star Watt, Tacky, Tedium, Timid, TV-like, Unfunny, Writer Humiliation

Filed under: Movies

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12-Oct-2019


Cannibal Women In The Avocado Jungle of Death (1989) Bites

The politic of the feminist necessitates eating men. Shannon could (act,) Bill squeaked and Adrienne shouldn't have. 12-Oct-2019

Tags: 1980s, Accidental Watch, Art Devoid, Camp, Comedy, Funny, Sort of, Inappropriate, Over the Top, Political Satire, Preposterous, Sad Effects, Shrill Act, Silly, Tacky, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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12-Oct-2019




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