All Posts Tagged as 'Advice'
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'Put some clothes on!': Chrissie Hynde slams scantily-dressed feminists
Chrissie Hynde has slammed scantily-dressed feminists saying ''if you walk around looking like a sex worker you will probably be treated like one''.
Dear Abby: His teenage daughter won’t wear pants, and it disturbs me when I visit
DEAR ABBY: My fiance, “Jay,” has a 14-year-old daughter who has been home-schooling during the quarantine, and she refuses to put pants on. When we ask her to, she gets upset.
She isn’t built like the average teenager. Abby, she’s 5’10” and weighs 200 pounds, so it’s like seeing a grown woman in her underwear.
I think it’s inappropriate for a young woman her age to be unwilling to dress herself fully, and I don’t like seeing her like that every time I go to their house.
Jay doesn’t notice. He says it doesn’t bother him, and he doesn’t mind when I ask her to put shorts on.
I don’t feel it’s my place at this point to dictate what she wears, but I’m uncomfortable. I don’t know if I’m crossing a line or if it’s normal to feel this way. Help!
DIDN’T THINK I WAS A PRUDE
My mother texts me multiple times a day either in a private message or in a group message with my brother and his girlfriend. Most of the texts are “just checking in” or “thinking of you.” I already feel like the world’s worst daughter for complaining about this, but it feels like it’s too much. I am 28 years old, married, and have a 1-year-old. I work full time in an ER, which obviously has its own stressors. For this reason, I haven’t seen my mom since the pandemic started. I know it’s getting to her not being able to see me and my daughter, and I empathize with that. I video chat with her at least once a week, and I respond to her texts most of the time, but honestly she’s driving me crazy. We don’t have the relationship that she wishes we had. I’ve always found it hard to talk to her, and we are fundamentally polar opposites. I feel guilty for thinking this, let alone writing it out, because I know I would feel devastated if my daughter felt this way. Do I suck it up and go on with the multiple texts and group texts and realize it’s not that bad in the grand scheme of it all, or do I upset her and set boundaries?
Passenger who squeezed flight attendant’s butt & called him “gay boy” gets sent to prison
An unruly passenger was just sentenced to six months in prison for the sexual assault of a male flight attendant.
The passenger, Gavin Capps, was flying with EasyJet from Manchester, U.K., to Iceland for work this past January, when he attacked the flight attendant.
Related: 4 firemen arrested for attempted sexual assault of a male teenaged volunteer
Capps had three beers on the flight and went to the front of the plane to get more, but he was sent back and told to wait for the in-flight service. When the duty-free trolley came down the aisle, Capps took 400 cigarettes from it and hid them under his seat.
Flight attendants warned him to stop causing trouble, but then he attacked.
“Ex-lesbian” is “thanking God” for the COVID pandemic because Pride parades were canceled
South Korea's coronavirus contact tracing singles out LGBTQ community
Petition Calls To ‘Change Symbol For NHS’ From LGBT Pride Flag
A Straight Man Thinks the Pandemic Might Have Turned Him Gay
Picky eating linked to demanding parents who limit foods, study says
Frustrated with your child's picky eating? If you're trying to fix the problem by becoming the food police, you're probably making your child's habit of picky eating worse, according to a new study that followed more than 300 parent-and-child pairs for five years.
The study found no difference among children due to socioeconomic demographics, but did find higher rates of picky eating among children who had problems regulating their emotions. Those children were more prone to exaggerated changes in mood with possible heightened irritability or temper.
One of the best practices for parents dealing with picky eaters is to expose your child to the food multiple times, experts said, and always without stress.
A therapist shares the 7 biggest parenting mistakes that destroy kids’ mental strength
We live in an increasingly stressful world, which is why it has never been more important to foster emotional and mental resiliency in our children.
Not only are mentally strong kids better prepared to tackle future problems on their own, but studies have found that they’re also more likely to be engaged in school and in their future jobs.
It won’t be easy for parents, but avoiding these common mistakes can help.
1. Minimizing your kid’s feelings
Kids need to know that it’s healthy to express and talk about their emotions. When parents tell their kids things such as “don’t be so sad about it” or “it’s not a big deal,” they’re sending the message that feelings don’t matter and that it’s better to suppress them.
If your kid is displaying expressions of fear during a loud storm, for example, considering saying, “I know you’re scared right now.” Then ask them what they think would make them feel better. This teaches them how to manage and cope with emotions on their own.
The goal is to help them practice brainstorming solutions until they find something that works.
Glennon Doyle thinks our kids suck. And it’s all our fault.
New York Times bestselling author Glennon Doyle is unequivocal in her opinion on modern parenting.
In her new book Untamed, she describes how parents receive a ‘terrible memo’ from society as soon as our kids are born.
This memo says that our kids are our saviours and parenting them is akin to a religion. We must give them every opportunity possible and most importantly, we must never allow anything difficult to happen to them.
According to Glennon, not only does this disastrous memo make us parents feel exhausted, neurotic and guilty; but it is also the reason why our kids suck.
The reason our kids suck, she says, is because we no longer allow our children to learn how to lose, or to struggle, or to be rejected.
My Son Told Friends He’s Gay. He Tells Me He Was Joking.
Dear Care and Feeding,
My 11-year-old son has been spending a lot of time playing Minecraft with online friends. They talk (I can hear everything they say, mostly silly preteen jokes) and text, and I looked at his chat screen. I read, “Please don’t say anything out loud. My mom doesn’t know I’m gay.”
I asked my kid why he wrote that. He said it was a joke. Then he said his account was hacked. Then he said his best friend is gay. I’m shocked. His dad and I have no problem if he’s gay, and he knows it. Do I give him space? I don’t want to out him (if that’s what’s up), but I hate that he can’t talk to me. My love and feelings for him are not affected at all by whether he’s gay, and I want to respect his privacy. Still, I’m hurt.
Mum who ‘isn’t homophobic’ but scared her son’s HIV-positive boyfriend could ‘accidentally’ pass it to their children gets a blunt science lesson
The woman said she was recently introduced to Stephen’s new boyfriend Adam on a Zoom call, and was shocked when she learned that he is living with HIV.
“My son announced this on the Zoom call (I didn’t have time to process it), and then became irate when I asked some questions to better understand what that means,” she wrote.
“I remember the ’80s, and actually had a close friend die from AIDS,” she continued.
“My son claims I’m being ignorant, but I was alive during that time – he wasn’t!”
I’m not homophobic. I just need some processing time.
Bizarrely, the woman then went on to claim that she is “scared of what will happen if they stay together and have children.”
My wife passed away, and I have fallen in love with her best friend. She feels she would be disrespecting my wife’s name if she went out with me. How can I let her know my wife would not object to us dating?
I Love My Boyfriend but Want a Girlfriend
My partner is the most compassionate, loving, and respectful partner I could ask for. He has supported me through difficult times, weight fluctuations, questioning my gender, changing my name, and sobriety, among other things. I am incredibly attracted to women. He knows this, and we have talked about opening our relationship. However, he is on the spectrum of asexuallity and is only interested in having sex with me. The thought of me having sex with other people makes him deeply uncomfortable, as we both relate to sex in very different ways. We have had this conversation a few times in the year that we have been together, but with no solid plan or outcome. I respect and appreciate our relationship more than my desire to sleep around, but I’m worried that I will be missing something. I’m only 20, and I know that feelings change, but he is an incredible domestic and sexual partner, and I would like to be with him for a long time. Is there a way to figure this out? Or will this core incompatibility be what breaks us apart?
Teen rips 'lazy mother' for wanting another child: 'She should give up her dream'
A 16-year-old girl sparked debate on Reddit after seeking advice about her parents, who have 12 children already and want three more.
The teenager, who wrote under the username doodlydoot, shared her story on the subreddit AmITheAsshole, where her post has since received more than 25,000 upvotes and nearly 2,000 comments.
One night, the teen said her mom asked her to put her twin 3-year-old siblings to bed while she was busy studying for a test and was met with backlash when she refused to do it.
“She said that it is my responsibility as an older child,” the 16-year-old wrote. “I lost my temper and told her that she can’t take care of her 12 kids as it is, and that she should give up her dream of 15 children because she’s depriving the younger ones of a better life.”
Redditors rushed to the girl’s defense, with a majority agreeing that her siblings were the responsibility of her parents and not her. Reactions ranged from urging her to call Child Protective Services to suggesting she move out.
My Mom Wants Me to Break Social Isolation and Visit Her for Mother’s Day
My Husband Wants to Bone Through the Pandemic. I Keep Thinking About My Parents Dying.
Dear How to Do It,
I live in a small apartment in New York City, and I’m currently “sheltering in place”/self-isolating with my family (husband, two small kids). I was sent home from my job that I love, with no idea if or when they will ever reopen. My parents fall in the coronavirus “at risk” category of 60+ with underlying conditions. I, myself, have a rare lung condition, and I don’t know if that puts me in a higher risk group, too. So, having said all that, I’m struggling with thoughts of existential anxiety 24/7 and have zero libido. My husband, while largely in the same boat, does not have this problem and his sex drive is as high as ever. He thinks I should try to take my mind off things, and the best way to do that is with an orgasm. I think the odds of me orgasming right now are … zero. I can’t turn my brain off. Even during foreplay, I find myself worrying about my parents dying, worrying about the upcoming bills we have with only one income, worrying about going grocery shopping and contracting COVID-19, even if we take precautions. I feel guilty for denying my high-sex-drive husband sex, but I just don’t know how to relax enough to enjoy myself while we’re staying inside for the next weeks during this pandemic.
Our Son’s Next-Door Friend Is an Aggressive, Manipulative Trickster
Dear Care and Feeding,
Our neighbors moved in next door a couple of years ago. We were thrilled when we discovered they had kids. Their son is one year older than our son, and, while we initially thought he would be a convenient playmate for our son, we couldn’t have been more wrong. On the day his family arrived, we invited their son to play in our backyard so that his parents could focus on moving in. The new neighbor boy immediately reached out from the top deck of our play set and started dismantling the swings from the beam, to the great amusement of our son. He also proved to be a rough and aggressive kid with no regard for others’ belongings. To his credit, when we intervene, he changes his behavior, but only momentarily.
Besides being excessively aggressive, he’s manipulative as well. He instructs our son to do things that he knows will get my son in trouble (even from his side of the fence during this time of quarantine). Even though we have discussions with our son about how, “The neighbor boy knew you would get in trouble for holding up your middle finger. Do you think he’s your friend?,” our son can’t help but think of him as a friend or even as an older boy to look up to.
We simply don’t have the time to be constantly supervising them. We’ve gone from being thankful for having a neighbor boy for our son to play with to being fearful of letting our son play outside at all. I have spoken with his parents about his behavior a few times, but honestly, I could tell them unpleasant things about their son every day. We feel stuck. What can we do?
—Blustered by This Bully
My in-laws recently moved to our city and live close by in a nice condo. They ask to (actually, inform us that they plan to) stay at our house when we are out of town. I believe they think of it as a kind of vacation. I think that this is weird and unnecessary. (We do not have any pets, children, or plants that require sitting.) That’s my main hang-up—it’s just not necessary for them to be in our space. My husband says we have no good reason to say no. I can definitely name some reasons, not the least of which is preparing a home for guests, but is it enough to simply value our privacy? If so, how do we communicate this to them? I don’t want to create an expectation that our home is available to them as a kind of hotel whenever it’s empty.
—Not a Hotel