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Obi-Wan Kenobi (2022-) Bites

S1E4. I bought a box of Depends so I could put up with the rest of the season. 13-Jun-2022
S1E1. The disease that made Hayden Christensen sink Darth Vader may have been borne from Star Wars speak not Hayden Christensen. The acting is horrible. The originals are the only ones that understood that nerdy language. The series recreates a legend whose ending has already been written but doesn't push it any further. To 2022? It's so corny I shit my pants backwards. 02-Jun-2022

Tags: 2020s, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Cliche, Drama, Egotistical, Fantasy, No Chemistry, Over the Top, Overcooked, Sci-Fi, Silly, Timid, Tired, Wit Crack

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13-Jun-2022


Married At First Sight Australia (2015-)  Woof

My 12 year old cocksucker swallowed Hades' cum and it tasted like a raspberry margarita. Pretty boys don't need to try as hard in relationships when set up with insecure mole faces. Hercules is not that hot because he smells like a chimp. Daniel did not pass the good dick test. The horse is ashamed to admit that she was set up with a fart. Al fixed his wife by shoving his Bizarro Colin Jost dick inside her. Married women who find solace prescribing pity to a newly single newlywed are sluts. 09-Jun-2022
Hades arises from his tomb to test humanity's tolerance for truth. A woman can only fathom a dream if a gay man concocts it. Man losing his hardon for a cultural thing is a real thing. He's bald Jerry, is no longer sexually gratifying his ick. Brent is sweet to make you fat and incapable of moving when he cleans you out. Al Perkins always looks surprised to fuck. He's prettier than a boy bander and is successful in bed. That's not possible! What is his crime? A giant ear bit texan should not have to explain himself to a pretend Hillary. Maybe he hates you because you're not doing Asian right not because he hates your culture. Hades set our dicks on fire. 06-May-2022
Season 6 was withheld from us because we are not mature enough to handle emotional failure. Hades and his coven interpret every relationship based on a fairytale and are genuinely horrified when reality proves it untrue. Hades unleashes romper terminators to seduce Ares and Hercules to ignite the audience and insult the wives. I could taste the master's lava. I threw up but didn't explode. 01-Oct-2020

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Chemistry, Crapfun, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Insulting, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Psychological, Reality, Romance, Scary, Star Watt, Sweet, Wig Crack, Words Spoke, Writ For Short Attn Spans

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09-Jun-2022


Stranger Things (2016 -) Full MoonDowngrade

If this were an enjoyable season I wouldn't have talked about their hair. The retro lab visit was every mythological idea the auteurs and their fan pages dreamed up during video chats. It met everywhere but the middle. Russian prison was an excuse to keep actors that can't stand each other apart. (But, the audience likes them together.) The prison chapter peaked when daddy shaved his hair. He won Best Hair. The extra stuff put me to sleep. Too much. 01-Jun-2022
S4E5. I was surprised how much I had forgotten and remembered. Old people don't have time to look back. There isn't much time. The hair is horrendous. A guaranteed 80's do is brushing it forwards, teasing it, spraying it and letting it go. Instant throwback art. El is a super dork with boy crushes, the token of leftwing communist bullying and delicate. She's a dehumanized weapon. Comicbook El would have found gifts of other strength to make her cope and conquer. Why would she become Carrie? Some of the characters were hard to bear. It zooms away from sense, piles for representation and exemplifies fandom exhaustion. The hair. Worst ever! 30-May-2022
PS: I spent most of the season wanting to comb everybody's messy hair. 08-Aug-2019
The magic dissipated in #3 but unity, bromance, and a pulverizing ending held it up. 06-Aug-2019
#2 gratified every sense with throb and tenderness. 29-Nov-2017
There can't be much to disconcert when with every dedication and homage you are dealt original cards with likeable imprinted players and a perplexing with soul reflexing game.

Wynona is unwavering in motherhood vs sanity as David Harbour is papa Bear strength. The kids are inherent, funny and affecting. Millie Bobbi Brown is tasked with conveyance of eye speak and she handles it beautifully.

Success is achieved through inspiration not impersonation. 29-Aug-2016

Tags: 2010s, Action, Beautiful, Classic, Comic Book, Conspiracy Theory, Cute, Daddy Squish, Decent FX, Director's Slice, Drama, Fantasy, Funny, Good Acting, Horror, Overcooked, Sci-Fi, Special, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet, Tedium, Tired, Touching, Twisty, Weird, Wig Crack, Writer's Peak

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01-Jun-2022


Below Deck: Sailing Yacht (2020-) Woof

Daisy exclaimed that the sock in Gary's pants is bullshit. Tiny fucker. Yum.
Captain brought his macaroni dick to guest's table and moved back so the charter could enjoy it. Good man. Gary darling made out with a boy and a girl but neither dared sit on him. Whew! Good to know there's only one rapist on Gary's love boat. 31-May-2022
The charter was a surgically enhanced female empowerment group. The type whose procedures make them look twenty years older because only old ladies need them. Why did it become serious when one charter member big splashed? Were they expecting a big sprinkle? One of the non-second stews left a fat sock in Captain's pant crotch. Did Chef Dos Latinos serve dessert with a little spoon because the Captain was dining with the charter or because he knew I would notice it? The Captain should have shown up for dinner in a jockstrap because all the women could talk about was Gary, Gary, Gary. Captain served the ladies macaroni crotch for breakfast but none of the women looked down. I would have stood on the table. The raped one was deliriously content making out with a non-second steward, giving fuck you stares to the rapist and riling up Ms. Long Ago. A man handles rape a little different. I'm not sure about this but I think a non-second stew stuck a similar sock in Gary's pants. 24-May-2022
Lord Salmon Decker has sexual amnesia. The sex was either very horrible or it felt illegal. Either way, amnesia is the best way out of the situation. Ashley couldn't keep her mouth shut and confessed every detail of the rape on video and audio on a loop. Yo, stop. I'm sure there's help waiting for her when they dock. They're wearing crew whites without any stripes. They will find her. Gary is the hero for fighting rape by not giving it the two cents it doesn't deserve. It's just another lousy fuck. It's not like shee reeped hiz ash to shereddss!!! 17-May-2022
If you unexpectedly slide it into Gary, he'll only notice a change in temperature. Chef Dos Latinos was perplexed by boobs so he made great food. Gary thinks that a male to female deck can do better than a female to female hand. Ashley thinks she should be promoted for raping a man and getting rid of Encanto. 11-May-2022
Gary got raped by a baby stew. The stew was giving the beautiful intoxication a massage when he fell asleep. He rolled over with a hard-on and she sat on it. Rape! Male whores sometimes get their rapes and hook-ups mixed up especially when they can't remember them. Double rape! HE DID NOT CONSENT! HE WAS UNCONSCIOUS! He'll feel the pain once he's 55+ and has a compulsive desire to sue her. Gabriela did everyone a favor by booking her mental illness out of there. I know Chef Dos Latinos was tired of that Encanto bitch. Daisy's woman in charge consists of granting her crew the power to let her fuck with their heads. Is that why Gabby left? Nope, it was Gary's fault. Cuddling with a salmon mermaid that's going to fuck you over is a mental no no. Colin and Gabby watching Gary snog with baby's breath made his ass clench and her mind/vagina explode. Did the captain remove a peanut butter cup from its wrapper and replace it with a dollop of peanut butter? That is so cat. I think I understand captain's giant cracker fetish. He doesn't want to shit the boat when he tilts it. 19-Apr-2022

Tags: 2020s, By the Numbers, Camp, Drama, Fatigue, NSFW, Overcooked, Reality, Relationships, Showy, Shrill Act, Stupid Funny, Travel, Writer's Peak

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31-May-2022


Temptation Island (2019-) Arf

The reunion was all about Lascelles' back fat troubles and man socks. Loving it! 29-May-2022
Daddy host kept rocking those skinny jeans. Yeehaw, cousin. Lascelle's back fat did not leave alone. Bizarro Lance Bass is dating an asian meatball. The guy with the hair is nothing but a hairball. His girlfriend thinks she's Diane Keaton in an award winning drama about failed relationships and killing lobsters. 28-May-2022
Lascelles' back fat jutted out of his giant torso and it was spectacular. The tip of his well crafted ass sparked memories of cracked wishbones. It was a lighter shade of his skin color. It was so wonderfully squishy. I imagined his ass sparkling in the dark. Beautiful contrast. Kittykats came to nip at homeboy but he became enraged. He only has eyes for hostile women. Two men got to see their future exes get it on with Hollywood sex workers. Mark Wahlberg attempted to bring skinny jeans back. Please let him. Girls have extensions, men need to parade what make gays swoon. It's joyful. Brains don't count. It was a black thing wasn't it. You didn't want to see it constantly. Thank God for latin TV, they are always five years behind. Back to the horny women. They were both riotous but only one moaned for more and then more. Was the fucker at his limit or was she granting him the permission to add two more inches every 20 seconds? Either way. Yikes!! 14-Apr-2022
Daddy's teeth don't work in a bonfire setting either. Okay. Some of those idiot things are melting my loins. Ack! 13-Apr-2022
Open marriages exist when one partner grows weary of the other's sex. You think? 31-Mar-2022
Mark Walberg's teeth are so white that he clashes with the sun. If you can't trust a man because he texts other girls you are Sherlock Holmes not paranoid. Fuck you, therapists! None of the boys are worth fealty. They're ack! There is some pretty ones on the Hollywood hooker side of the group but the caliber of men is very "Oscar," not deserving this year. A beast brother is rocking blue eyes and Cindy Brady curls. Ack. A guy from the Bronx is auditioning for West Side Story 2. Double ack. One of the tempted males is rocking doggy style long hair. You know, the haircut that separates the weave from your hair by curling at a non realistic point like all the females are wearing. Ghastly. 18-Mar-2022

Tags: 2010s, Camp, Cooking, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Home Improvement, Hot Swatch, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Overcooked, Political, Predictable, Pretty, Romance, Sap, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Suspense, Sweet, Tacky, Twisty, Unity, Us, Weird

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29-May-2022


Welcome To Eden (2022) Whimper

Younglings disabled on an island made to specifically serve two people. They are climate changers choosing nature over life. Death shall come to all except the ones who fight it. The mythology is not sensible or sustainable. The island surveils people without audio. The audio is everything. So poor. The boys are pretty in every sense and the girls are protein shakes. The relationships usurped all the interest that kept us glued to the nonsense. 19-May-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Camp, Chemistry, Crapfun, Disappointment, Drama, Foreign, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, LGBTQ, Overcooked, Psychological, Warbly, Words Spoke

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19-May-2022


Ex On The Beach (2014-) BitesDowngrade

It's uncomfortable watching gay boys creeping on girls. A woman has no safety zones. We end up feeling sorry for her and hating him. My generation was very proud of its identification and it's preference. We had an unwritten contract. The point of being gay was to retire vagina. This generation confuses itself. It confuses me. It confuses everybody. 17-May-2022
S5E2. Love means having to say you're sorry, a lot. The only thing holding a black woman down is her cheating membrane of a boyfriend. Are ragers who splash people with drinkable liquids pool owners? This asshole wants to know. Bisexuals proved synonymous with hypocrisy. A gay preference disguised as an accident is no reason to fuck up a trans life. Trans needs a do over. We've already established that wet dog dos are out. A man pretending to be more than a bisexual is a pervert who fucks little children. 10-Apr-2022
S4E12. The only people stopping gays from advancing is other gays. Imagine if other gays didn't exist. How happy we'd all be. Adore's ex compared her smell to a llama. I was supposed to insert an inappropriate joke but since I'm not officially a comedian, I looked it up to be sure. They have no odor and you can make beans out of their poop. They're always lying down and won't crap in bed or on the bus. Ok. Why does the ex have the smell of a llama memorized? Does he fuck them? What a day old bagel. The mini bagel had a Superman ex try to sweep her off her feet and away from Joker except all she saw was Two-Face. Half of his face was gorgeous. The everything bagel got fucked when his bagel fell on the floor for more than five-seconds and three people tried to eat it. Just for fun, the lesbian is a toasted bagel with lox and extra cheese. 09-Apr-2022
S4E10. Wow, the guy with the fake piano teeth made it. How can you resist the "I'm going to break your heart and fuck your pussy" swag? The cis man considers LGBTQ the handmaidens of sex. Promise the alpha good sex and he'll treat you like a handmaiden. Is the lesbian legal? The black "everything bagel" jock will be exposing his dick like a trophy to babies in a future verse. If we're going to teach sex ed in schools we should commence with a speech on how everybody is going to cheat on your fucking ass because you will probably suck at sex or snore. 08-Apr-2022
S4E1. Chronicling the lives of loser exes on a frozen beach. The producers found men that would risk their straight asses for love. Transvestites, drag queens and lesbians unite. The lesbian is granted male toxicity status because her big dick is plastic. A white man got all Will Smith when he noticed his black compatriot with a piano keys mouth. He is going to slap the fakeness out of them. 06-Apr-2022

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Comedy, Emasculating, Fun Acting, Gay, Hilarious, Horror, Incomprehensible, Insecurities, Insulting, Juvenile, LGBTQ, Lifestyle, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Overcooked, Preposterous, Psychological, Representing, Romance, Sex, Stupid Funny, Trashy, Wig Crack

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17-May-2022


Summer House (2017-) WhimperUpgradeArf

The wedding. Kyle never looked lovelier. Andrea reminded the guests how much he needs a green card. Amanda's father was proud that his daughter chose a wide enough dress to store her husband's money. All the parents looked miserable. Lindsay fought the urge to buy a cat by asking Carl out. Carl kindly refused because he needed more time to feel shitty and sober. Carl named his giant hands "daddy." The only thing missing from Ciara's attitude was a belly button. 03-May-2022
Paige took me to a LOL brink by hosting a "tennis" inspired navy band slutwear fashion show. Where is a black person supposed to wear marching band navy slutwear to? She might dare wear it in the ghetto but she's not making it out alive to enjoy it. How presumptuous of Paige to think all black people know about tennis. Why, because two sisters once played it? Everybody's picking on Lindsay because she refuses to become a cat lady with regrets. She'll be forgetting about dick soon enough, let her savor some memories. She shouldn't be fucking so wildly after losing a child she never got to play with. WGAF. Lindsay should be able to change paths if she wants to. They all arrive to the same conclusion, death. Kyle has suffered enough male emasculation. He shook the table a little bit and everyone reacted like "the slap 2." Dude, Ciara poured wine and smashed glass on people! That was about something else. Really? Amanda's parents shoved their greedy asses into the prenup mess. In order for a feminist to succeed she needs her man's money. Her parents are scary. I'm surprised Kyle wasn't constantly farting through dinner. 19-Apr-2022
Yo! Lindsay got creamed for fucking multiple partners without being a parent. Ciara cannot forgive her for fucking her non-boyfriend. Bitch is lucky nobody made her clean up the broken glass. Raging with future alopecia is not helpful. Alex can only make one thing big and it's not his dick. Amanda does not want to sign a prenup that excludes her from fucking the nurse and taking all of Kyle's money. Andrea's huge dick can't guarantee him a green card. He needs to stop fake crying and fuck the shit out of Alex. Gays have power too and they clench real tight. 12-Apr-2022
Ciara took a page out of Will Smith's bio, broke glass and splashed red wine on her roommates. Some of them wore white! She was angry because her ex fucked the cat lady. Kyle did what the Oscars didn't dare and dragged her out. Karl realized that the road to happiness doesn't have to include his giant hands. He's going to have to use his dick too. Ken Doll asked for a prenup because he doesn't want his wife fucking the hot nurse and forgetting about his feeding tube. The only thing Andrea misses is not being a citizen of a country that accepts rampant sex. Paige's new boyfriend acts like a feeding tube. 05-Apr-2022
Reunion 2. The Hannah/Kyle dispute was tucked away. Kyle is the middle aged version of her fiancee and the man of her wet dreams. Carl's hands spoke and touched everyone. He did the giant thing and they swooned. Lindsay spoke like a man and got appreciation. Luke smashed Hannah's face in the jelly jar and brought down the fourth wall of reality TV. The host pretended minimally to scoop it up. "No. Really. It's not, we're not, I'm not, none of us are... fake. Really." 08-May-2021
Reunion. Hannah cried at every word rhyming with Luke and puked at every reference to Kyle. Kyle busted his rubber bands and walked out. Luke is still apologizing for being horny. Host did not offer Carl's giant hands their own seat or their own questions. 30-Apr-2021
I had a doll like Kyle once. He was blonde, four feet tall with rippling muscles, and a thong. He could pop rubber bands with his biceps. I had my seven foot black GI Joe fuck the shit out of him every day. My mother noticed the cum stains on Kyle and made him disappear. Something akin to how Hannah feels. She admired him in the toy store window when she was a tot but her mother wouldn't buy him for her. Shush, honey, that's only for boys. She can't get her hands on him. He's so disgustingly dominant for a little dick. I want him! No, I don't! Luke what? If I were Ciara I would have gotten Carl fucked up, up my dress and convulsing to his giant hands by now. Next morning. Car screeches away. Who was that? Carl. He had business to take care of. Really? Lindsay. Not being self-conscious of what she's doing makes her a really bad actress. Happy married with children! 23-Apr-2021
Stephen found out the hard way that there is no pleasing a woman. Dude, they're cocaine and we're weed. Wear them out. 05-Feb-2021

Tags: 2010s, Camp, Cliche, Fake, Fatigue, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Incomprehensible, Juvenile, Overcooked, Reality, Relationships, Shrill Act, Tacky, Weird

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03-May-2022


Love Island (UK) (2015-) BitesUpgradeHowl

S7E12. She made me roar. She looks like something I would've faked to perfection. Men in skinny jeans are such beautiful assholes. LOL. 16-Apr-2022
S7E10. A boy band member got into trouble for calling women with surgical enhancements fake. I think they prefer the term "lizard." It was a high noon of male intolerance. Boys privately plotted against the women and covered their tracks. "Be nice. Fuck the shit out of them later." "Hey, you can fuck mine too if you want." "Bros for life until one snitches." The women's idea of a fairytale ended when a more expensive piece of plastic showed up to delete their fantasies. New lizard is making those dinosaurs roar! Her plastic is shiny. 14-Apr-2022
S7. A few episodes. Black diamond got duped by a couple of assholes that hypocritically crowned her a black queen of mosquitoes. Pretty boys talk over girls because they're not sucking their foreign cocks. They'll stop talking and start moaning as soon the girls put their gentle lips on their dicks. Girls with extensions get dry humped and black guys that make out for a long period of time become ashy. There are as many slaps as there are boners. 13-Apr-2022
Men have invented a new derogatory language to upset women. What now? We can't ban every word... or can we? Nobody mentioned french toast, its the best (any foreigner with sweet tasting d...) 22-Feb-2020
Contestants get paid to be inappropriate to strangers. 16-Feb-2020
I misinterpreted its existence. We are judging cave dwellers hooking up in a modern habitat. Skinny jeans, man pillows, wrangling, snogging, heart rips, musical accents and an errattic ear...that's entertainment. It's a braincation. 16-Feb-2020
Boring in any language. 25-Aug-2019

Tags: 2010s, Brutal, Camp, Cliche, Drama, Early Exit, Fake, Fatigue, Foreign, Funny, Hot Swatch, Juvenile, Overcooked, Predictable, Psychological, Reality, Relationships, Sexy, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Suspense, Sweet, Tacky, Talk, Twisty, Unity, Weird, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

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16-Apr-2022


Bridgerton (2020-) WoofUpgradeHowl

Season Two was as beautiful as one of Lord Bridgerton's ass muscles. Queen Charlotte. Lady Danbury. Lady Bridgerton. Lady Portia. Eloise. Pen. Wigs. Costumes. Romance. Moooah. 30-Mar-2022
S1E8. A woman wraps up the marriage contract when she can birth a good shank to serve the round table. Men like ideals in women's heads so that our explanations make sense to them. It was brotime, sweetie! They took the cultures out of the equation. We judge them individually. Every actor willed good force. It was fun, it was camp, it was time and we're in it. The ending was delicious and I'm trading the duke in for the boxer. The duke has an "I'm so pretty" snarl. The other looks like my camper. Good job. 28-Dec-2020
S1E7. Mid-thru is an explanation of how black culture became elite. I bought it. The series needs more scandal and debauchery though. I'm replacing yes, daddy with yes, duke. 27-Dec-2020
S1E2. Not necessarily the show I want to binge on after mother telling me my black is white but it's Shonda so I'll give it a go. The shock of seeing black empowered gentleman and ladies of the pre-Victorian era makes my brain explode with fact check assumptions. I don't because I want to accept it on its own merit. Most of the cast whistles, foams and pours whilst the rest couldn't get out of their modern heads. The business at hand is to score the most pristine and delicate virgin hopefully with fine manners (a "yes girl") to fulfill a man's dream of future family and success. A woman's power is to profit from the business, band and thwart any mismatch that might bring a daughter harm and make sons proud. Shonda adds her sight of man appreciation, Shondaspeare fast talk and on your knees intrigue. I remember Nicola Coughlan because I wanted to eat her like she ate that cake. She's delicious. The picture for myself didn't get any clearer because I'm watching black people pretending to live whites lives. It makes the future modern brain wonder what the hate was all about. 26-Dec-2020

Tags: 2020s, Brutal, Chemistry, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Discomfort, Drama, Elegance, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Hot Swatch, Music Rocks, Mystery, Nostalgic, Overcooked, Psychological, Relationships, Romance, Sentimental, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Tight

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30-Mar-2022


Michael Landon: The Father I knew (1999) Arf

They asked a 6'3" player to act like a 5'9" giant dipper. Only women can feel the difference. Boy dreams of his celebrity father becoming a hero at home instead of inserting more strangers into his life. Celebrity boy rebels against father after daddy divorces the family for fresh "baby smell" poultry. The first time I witnessed a race to grandpa's lap crotch was the last time I blinked during any of the games. No offense Little Landon, but if you inherited his crotch, you'll be fine. 27-Feb-2022

Tags: 1990s, Accidental Watch, Bio, By the Numbers, Crapfun, Fun, Funny, Overcooked, Pitchy, Preachy, Relationships, Silly, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Basic

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27-Feb-2022


Pam & Tommy (2022) Woof

Bad karma comes for a goddess sexually devoured by a demon. Tommy Lee was gifted with hand coordination, skinny genes, okay face, crazy hair, insecurity tattoos and a large dick. He's drying out and she's washing ashore. Little daddy has dickish ways that compels people to put him on a "do not disturb" list. Sebastian Stan finds his inner asshole. He plays a dickilicious horndog like a thespian. I wanted to lick every inch of his physical imperfections. Lily James was aware that Pamela Anderson was a gullible and bubble headed person because that is how the writers conceived her. Stan and James are fun, rock underwear looks a lot like gay underwear, the appendage was stupid and inaccurate, when it talked it got smaller and none of Seth Rogen's shenanigans seemed feasible. He's still a funny fucker though. Gutter white trash with money, beauty, some talent and porn tapes. Karma ate them up for enjoying sex. 24-Feb-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Camp, Chemistry, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Music Rocks, Over the Top, Overcooked, Preposterous, Pretty, Relationships, Romance, Sex, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Tight

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24-Feb-2022


Joe Millionaire: For Richer Or Poorer (2022-) Woof

The Joes met the ladies' families. The organization could not release any family members of cartel girl due to safety concerns so they sent a muscle disguised as a GBFF. He was hilarious. One of the fathers became horny and cringey. He warned the Joes about his daughter's "down there" and nobody flinched. A spider? What? One of the Joe's thought the gay dads were strippers. What else would they be? They were good looking. 18-Feb-2022
The semi Joes eliminated the girl whose makeup couldn't hide her age. Hahaha. 03-Feb-2022
There is no one to explore except cartel girl. Mother demands that Tarzan Joe, her future baby daddy with no money, spare her all the attention, even if he's fondling another. Unfortunately, fondling is not acceptable if its done to your face. Cartel girl is desperate. She gets a call from the boss threatening to cancel baby feedings if she doesn't nab that millionaire. Meanwhile, the iguanas are falling from the skies. The men imprinted their preferences and I hope a smart woman remembers them. "The less make-up the better or young, goldiggers are just finger fucks, children are an item and men don't give a shit." - Joe Millionaire 29-Jan-2022
The unbalanced black flat chick ended her rage after it was discovered that she was too mentally unwell (she spoke truths that insane people don't want to hear). White people like to have fun. They don't whine if their hair frizzes up like their foe. They just reinvent it. The latin mother is so obsessed with her conquest that it feels like she has a cartel up her ass forcing her to do so. Adios. My pecker is like a compass and the needle is not pointing to either Joe. Can we bring original Joe in? He may be a hideous bear now but I'm sure he can still make slurps sing. 23-Jan-2022
It took two bachelors to add up to one Joe Millionaire. The original's historical "slurp around the world" was magnificence. My pecker picked the poor one until I got to know him then I switched. Tarzan hair is fun but he's such a pendejo. He has no sexual entitlement. Cowboy Cheeky is fuckable in a Chucky kind of way. He has a bubbly ass. In my day, they would have called the contestants, escapees from mental institutions. A desperate "housewife to be" decides to wear the same dress as another contestant. Neither chose to "rock" the shitty dress and left it up to the millionaire to decide which tacky slut filled it the least. It depends how gay the men are. Black girl gets drunk and starts feeling used. She goes on a rant. White girls are not having it so they plot. Mothers of America. Shame on You! You've turned your daughters into dumb sluts competing for basic. Original Joe hands. Classic. 10-Jan-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Comfort Food, Cowboy, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Emasculating, Fake, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Hilarious, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Predictable, Preposterous, Psychological, Reality, Revenge, Romance, Scary, Showy, Shrill Act, Silly, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Tough, Wit Crack, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Tough

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18-Feb-2022


Single's Inferno (2021-) Woof

A different culture with precise goals, criticisms and charisma. It's the Bob Ross of reality dating shows because it illuminates everything, casts a spell and mansplains why men should exist in an established manner within slow strokes of genius. Bob Ross created trees from memory and turned landscapes into blossoms. I did not get accustomed to their tradition until I turned English dub on. I could memorize the texture of their speech and apply it to their emotions. It made me respect the nuances of a quiet nation, laugh and hurt with them and not get as angry. 14-Feb-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Director's Slice, Drama, Egotistical, Emasculating, Fake, Foreign, Funny, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Insulting, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Overcooked, Pitchy, Predictable, Pretty, Psychological, Reality, Sentimental, Tacky, Writ Tough

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14-Feb-2022


Danger Force (2020-) Arf

Super daddy breaks up with his crack sidekick whose moved on to a new world. Super Daddy becomes a teacher to wee ones with special gifts. They are diverse and indistinctive. Babies are subjected to kidnappings, Brexit jokes, beatings, torture, homo flavor and death. Sex is left to our imagination. The kids are fighting a world that thinks them the punchline. Daddy crunch served with youthful subjugation and lots of gay spirit. 08-Nov-2021

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Brutal, Camp, Comic Book, Costume, Daddy Squish, Fatigue, Gay Swatch, Over the Top, Overcooked, Pitchy, Preposterous, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Twinkie, Wit Crack

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08-Nov-2021




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