All Posts Tagged as 'Best In Horror'
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Love Island UK (2019-)
Women are pursuing these motherfuckers because there is a cash prize at the end, correct? I don't remember Reuben. There was nothing to latch onto. Josh must choose to be blacker or whiter. Yes, I had a doll that looked like Blade. Hugo combs his hair in reverse. I bet Konnor is a fantastic one nighter. Will must be hung. Joey is a doll. Sean is Jimmy Oleson. Ayo, we pray for you. I would have barbecued Trey like he was a lobster. Moziah reeks of beauty and nature. Ciaran has too many identities going on. 11-Jul-2024
Love Island (2019-)
Gays undercover have no idea how to deal with female toxicity. 06-Aug-2021
Gays undercover are still saving women. Men with sexual dysfunctions agreed to remain in their original coupling. Men think women are stupider than them because they believe everything they say. 30-Jul-2021
S3E9. The men are playing football, faking the women into doing behind the scenes porn in front of the team, their family and friends. Gay boys are undercover to make sure the rejected puppies don't get tackled. It's cheating but the show has an image to uphold. May the best cock win! 26-Jul-2021
Horror In The High Desert (2021)
I don't know if I would have reacted so strikingly if I knew that it wasn't what it was. I think blind is the proper way to see it and befits the mock ending. The acting is the accuracy that sells the illusion. The words and direction built interest, tension and fright. Giving the villain an excuse was a misstep because it lets the cat out of the bag. It kicked Blair Witch's ass. 20-Apr-2023
Omen, The (1976)
An opulent chiller with legends, iconics, a badass score, glorious shots, intriguing plot, animal attacks, nannies in charge and that kid's wondrous face. It fit all the musts neatly. When Gregory Peck wishes his son were dead, he meant it. Lee Remick made the arduous task of rearing a strange child heartbreakingly empathetic. Evil emanates from every corner. 25-Mar-2023
All Of Us Are Dead (2022-)
S1E5. A virus apocalypse has erupted in high school. The younglings are fighting for their lives whilst the adults are saving face by not prioritizing them. It's a metaphor for the insignificance of "future first" if the safety of viable people in the present is not a consideration. The younglings can't blame cultural suppression, sexual confusion or identity as a source of teen angst and school bullying. They are all at the same level. Their souls are their weakness or their strength. The virus is simply explained as a Frankenstein complex. Boys can be whatever they want as long as they learn to survive it. The action is relentless. I was surprised and delighted how imaginative expression can be. The younglings earn our hearts by decoding survival skills and being kids. It's horror art. 02-Feb-2022
Goodnight, Mommy (2014)
Mother returns home after cosmetic surgery. She is burdened with twin boys, bandaged, tired, snarly and in need of recuperation. The boys are lonely and constantly interrupting her beauty rest which makes her upset and overreactive. The boys become convinced that the woman hiding under the bandages is not their mother. She's more violent than usual. The boys test her extensively and unbearably. They want to prove she's a fraud. "Misery" mayhem is top notch, direction has balls and the cast is deadly. 17-Jun-2021
Love Island (2019-)
S2E32. Women are no longer viable as sexual beings so I'm doing a gay male review. Johnny is the gorgeous god you play with but don't mess with. Carrington is the luscious top boy whose ass you have to taste. You're hooking up with Caleb even though your instincts are crushing you because his game is really really good and Calvin looks like the cousin that introduced me to naughty sex. 16-Oct-2020
Something's missing. Is it the "I kin kill a beah and cook it for ya" supervisor with capabilities accent or the females slightly squeakier version of it? Americans don't care. They rather complain about Cuties than judge the real culprit...themselves. There's "yeah, you're cute poor," "waving anatomy parts freely on a farm, dirt poor," "just fucking desperate and will fuck for a Walmart gift card piss ass poor." (Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you meant gif.) 20-Sep-2020
I love "Casa de Amor," wherein sexual workers extract the soul of a man through penile engrossment. 16-Sep-2020
The police sirens add amateur porn reality. 09-Sep-2020
The UK version redeemed its relevance. Horny younglings released from quarantine onto a desert mirage of true love. Fuck the boys and do not marry the girls. 08-Sep-2020
Finale. My manhood has been restored. I felt absolutely nothing. 13-Aug-2019
Toxic playpen wherein a woman's suffering and desperation is a man's empowerment. 01-Aug-2019
Monkey Shines (1988)
A fit daddy mentally bound by matriarchy becomes paraplegic. He receives a horrified nurse, a mother pseudo, a no nonsense trainer and a mentally enhanced monkey.
The art of training an animal lives in its soul. The monkey represents the current female to determine his life. The monkey is a frighteningly adorable beast.
George A. Romero packs it with Hitchcock simplicity and sensical horror. Each frame a joy to ponder.
Jason Beghe is an addictive force.
The mother/son spar sliced bluntly.
I lurched, I was engrossed and the end was brutally sweet. 07-Jul-2020
Others, The (2001)
Children and the help, quarantined with a compulsive mother obsessed with the idea of being as great as God. It's made of Hitchcock walls, star quality is legend of old and the understated score unnerves. It's refined spookery. Nic is powerhouse mama alleviator and authoritarian, putting the kids sweetly to bed, one minute and wanting to chop their heads off, the next. The ending is ruined once you know it but the lesson still rings true. Nothing ever is as it seems. 27-Apr-2020
Jaws (1975)
Jaws is the ultimate water pandemic. It's misinterpretations no longer matter, because its proven law. We panic, take precautions and find a loophole to reopen. The loophole is that there's always a bigger shark out there. A sentiment for only the purest of heart.
My mother and my sister would call me Spielbergio, every time I would pick-up a camera. They eventually bullied me into putting it down (Thank God.) I thought it was cute but they were being harmful.
Mr. Spielberg opens doors to the imagination like a magician disappears from a box. It's simple, you can figure it out but the trick always works. Where did he go? He wills everything wider, cleaner and funner.
Ultimate daddy squish (Scheider,) a fiery one nighter daddy (Shaw) and a blubber daddy with smarts, cool gadgets and a checking account (Dreyfus,) generate all the magnetism a film needs.
John Williams' score tells it's own story.
I loved every minute of Bruce and the hard work involved to scare us.
A masterpiece because it was never about a shark, it was about us.
18-Apr-2020
Train To Busan (2016)
Zombie apocalypse gets an epic disaster movie treatment. I thought there was nothing left to do with a zombie but I was thrillingly surprised. The zombies are quick, staggering and evolved. Yeong Sang-ho returns as many things as he borrowed, lending it a huge amount of humanity and eagerly expanding the perception of claustrophobic spaces. Daddy mass clobbered, daddy major stepped up and daughter darling broke our hearts. 18-Feb-2020
Walking Dead, The (2010-)
The Governor capped villainy, the creators refuse to scientifically explain or move beyond its gloomy existence and another season of Negan smirks is off-putting. I'm quitting because it has no end and they are killing the future of zombie inspiration by hogging and pummeling us with it. 21-Feb-2019
Oops, I thought the show was evolving. 29-Nov-2018
Sometimes it's hard to see past the corn fields. 12-Nov-2018
They gambled 7 minutes too long. The alpha phased out. 05-Nov-2018
The most staggering surprises arise after sobering us for heartbreak. It was poetry. 11-Dec-2017
It ended to satiate the fans, bathed from blood of a cliched and predictable heart plus a curtain close. 03-Apr-2017
This is the 3rd time that Jeffery Dean Morgan has invaded a series at its vertex. I was always waiting for the grand manifestation of the buildup and all we got was a daddy with lots of fuckability, a frozen smirk that unnerves and trite villainy. Do over. 11-Nov-2016
Mature grit. Thanks for giving us the opportunity to interpret as we wish. 09-Nov-2016
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1996-2003)
The best because I may never anticipate an assurance of excellence. 23-Nov-2018
Exorcist, The (1973)
Nightmare of my childhood dreams. It scared the Jesus out of me and allowed me to champion fear. It's also a metaphor for how parents perceive teenage evolution. 29-May-2018
Better Watch Out (2016)
The idea is terrifying because the reality is. The film tests you and deplores you but you keep hanging on. We want to feel that the torture endured will dignify an ending release. The balls hang low. 30-Apr-2018