All Posts Tagged as '1990s'

I did not watch part I because searching might have induced sleep. Corporation is behind a biological experiment that enhances animal intelligence and creates a master to hunt them. The golden retriever stole scenes by being adorable, having human compassion and excellent computer skills. The hunter was an abomination with the characteristics of a melting candle. Master breaks loose and is trailing everyone doggie encountered. Humanity was present, appeal was nice, there were vibes, the dog did good work but the monster sucked. 19-Aug-2026

Dante didn't decipher the logic that would constitute human behavior in toys programmed to fight an endless war. Idiot manufacturer unwittingly transfers military tactics to child friendly robots to boost sales. Military toys targeting Gorgonites for destruction whose construction consisted of being weak and defenseless monster anti-dolls with hearts of gold. Who's side you pick is the name of the game. The toys were magnificently displayed but the heart was too advanced for our time. The first half was whimsical and cute but the rest was ICE versus immigrants action buffoonery. 16-Aug-2026

Classic tacky with gusto. 12-Jun-2025

The characters are strong, the funny keeps you laughing, the writing was pensive, passionate and controversial, the originals were fabulous and a black man in a girl's dress is always funny. Once Suzanne and Charlene depart the sizzle and purpose is gone. A talented trio of actors become shadows of the characters they were replacing without a voice of their own. The fatter Delta Burke got the funnier she became. You can feel the antagonism in the writing though. She was saddled with savage criticism and disdain but her talent was her shield. We could have done with less Julia fits but nobody could sell it like Dixie Carter. She was legs, elegance and conviction. Annie Potts liberated herself and her character. She sounded like she could give birth to a McConaughey. Jean Smart aced dumb and won our hearts. The last two seasons are somber and desperate. TG Alice Ghostley and Mr. Taylor are there to be irreverent and hilarious. 30-Dec-2024

As soon as I realized the original material centered around a pet beast, my mind started to baton twirl. Thor was the title and the name of the dog. But, the movie is about a werewolf, a mother and son, or is it? Mariel Hemingway was peak star watt that carried the weight of the movie's heart. The son is there to make the dog look good. Michael Pare was a one-time specimen that carried out his mission like a rebellious animal. Romance violently exits in the first 10 minutes, a brother/sister/uncle dynamic takes its place, Thor was the best actor and the transformation didn't suck. Man vs beast has been re-re-written so they tried something else. How does a dog protect his family when uncle is the king of canines and the myth rules don't apply? 05-Nov-2024

Laid out like an adult novel that kids can understand. There is no better marriage than broadway and Disney. The score may not be everlasting but it's made up of raw talent and emotion. The songs and singers soared. The animation splashed with celebratory colors while hellish fire represented its demise. Quasi is a molded adult broken by a murdered mother and a crippled body. He is adopted by the man who wronged him, controlled him and gaslit into hiding the monster inside of himself. The subjects are very adult. The adoptive father rules the town with sexual and racist motivation. Gypsies are taking over. The crime rate is through the roof and they are to blame. A Festival of Fools sets up the threads that make all the characters intersect for a grande finale. The monster convinces himself he can attend. A military captain has just been initiated. Esmeralda seduces all the men with her gypsy dance and her unapologetic heart. Evil master Frollo becomes obsessed with dominating her. The good men compete with each other to protect her. Everything is big, everything is right but it begged for a slow down. I know, the kiddies would've exploded in their seats but the adults might have watched it again. It's not the best but it's unique. 04-Jun-2023

Tracey Gold scrubbed her good girl identity to become a misunderstood feminist. The character runs away: from home, relationships and deep connections. Gold is a wild kitty playing life like a board game that she controls. Her forgiveness is theft and death. She assumes the identity of a kill to exit town but is tornado'd into becoming her. Shawnee Smith stirred instant empathy by being introverted, persevering, cute, desperate and clumsy. The girls become roommates, make connections, enjoy each other's company as we get to observe them. Mary Lambert directs with minute blood spills and no blows. How does evil get written on your face? She tries to explain that. Shawnee's father was a daddy wet dream for everybody except for the bitch waking him up. Perry King was carved with Kryptonian essence. His Highlander was superb but the tits and gorgeous craggly face were better. Lambert directs an intellectual showdown, the fight was fun TV Trash and Ms. Gold channelled Elizabeth Montgomery to eerie perfection. 11-Apr-2023

Asinine logistics applied to fatherdom for laughs and guffaws. Its savior is not logic but cuteness. You can cuddle with any of these people except the Russian character. 05-Apr-2023

Can a mother take responsibility for her son's incapacity to succeed and his desire to violently hurt women like her? Elizabeth Montgomery plays a respected community buyer that doesn't like anyone sullying her corrupt family name. The son has mother issues. She's abrasive and always disruptive. She thinks that if he listened to her that he would become a responsible man. Her son doesn't know how to act like a man because his mother didn't bestow him many survival skills. Beauty, abeyance, avarice and good manners are the best of the few. She approves of nothing the man does or fucks except when she wants to make out with him. The man's anger issues come with. Elizabeth's mother doesn't click until the end when she stops practicing and becomes. She came in eager like Serena and exited like Elizabeth, the good bitch. Dale Midkiff's son was gifted looks to hide his nuts. He didn't have to fake much. There is good cast support. It jams a lot of information that hampered the complexity of the characters but law and order held. 18-Mar-2023

Jessica Lange tortures Gwyneth Paltrow because she can. Unfortunately, not enough to qualify for Mommie Dearest status. The editing is abrasive and the film has the confidence of a TV movie from the 80s. Schaech is a floral centerpiece and the ladies work it but the movie is melodramatic. 10-Mar-2023

It masters everything but importance. 19-Feb-2023

They asked a 6'3" player to act like a 5'9" giant dipper. Only women can feel the difference. Boy dreams of his celebrity father becoming a hero at home instead of inserting more strangers into his life. Celebrity boy rebels against father after daddy divorces the family for fresh "baby smell" poultry. The first time I witnessed a race to grandpa's lap crotch was the last time I blinked during any of the games. No offense Little Landon, but if you inherited his crotch, you'll be fine. 27-Feb-2022

The inestimable is the most hurtful. Brian Bonsall played Mikey, a throwaway child with trust, jealousy and psychotic issues. The actor had the smarts of an adult aware of its value. Everyone loves "new" adorable thing until it becomes codependent and angry. The conversations are the same as today, which freaked me out. "We're still talking about the same shit with the non-resolutions." Mikey is presented as an adoptive boy trying to adjust to a family that has suddenly enforced rules. They must die, the most inept investigators can't solve it and adorable little Mikey is psychoanalyzed for PTSD after secretly killing them. The psychiatrist frees him into the adoption system with an "all he needs is love" diagnosis and Mikey moves on to the next stupid family. Mikey has learned that electricity and water don't mix, you can hit real balls with bats, cops can't solve anything, mothers just stand there screaming while you're stabbing them to death and to remove the bullets from adult guns and disconnect their phones so they can't fight back. Empty guns waving in the dark. Elementary school sports training consisted of coaches deciding which boy would be a "skin" or a "shirt" for no apparent reason other than to be a pervert. Telling certain kids and not others to strip is insulting and absolutely gay. His favorite teacher becomes suspicious of the boy's monstrous tendencies when he adds marbles to her "marble game." A box is designated for the kids to drop marbles they earn for good deeds. The more marbles of goodness you inherit the quicker you can fill it so its doors burst open and you can receive a prize. She investigates his history but his adoption file is closed and the witnesses are minimal. There is no living thing that is safe when Mikey gets pissed. Will he spare no one? Kids dragging adult dead bodies, killing cats, feeding frogs to sharks, setting up the boyfriend and using a bow and arrow to kill are hilarious. Everything looks TV safe and appealing, the deaths are LOL and Bonsall keeps on giving. He is the conservative cunt that arises when successful families keep pushing the same subject without advancing. Mikey is the child liberated from bullshit. Baby boy is my new "Carrie."

PS: dudes, if she wants childrenx and you don't, show her this movie. Repeated viewing depends on her voracity for children and disdain for the film. Keep it downlow. We don't want to damage her. Keep it stealthily in the background and don't stop watching it. Make it a top ten of all time. Yeah, it's crap but its better than having a baby. 21-Feb-2022

No one should be interested in a man that has left their love waiting at the altar three times. It labels the neglected, a doormat. Robin Williams is the Professor that discovers Flubber. Flubber is a squishy jello substance that appears animal except when it's being materialized as a money making substance. No one dies when hit by a fastball, brains don't get smashed when hit by bowling balls. The film thinks it's funny to apply the same stitches to both. Death is the realistic word. Weebo is a sexy pitched robot that sparks jealousy. Robots and emotions are confusing. We are not of the experienced mind to buy it. Robin is the sad guy who gets left, not the ass clown with regrets. Williams' sweetness permeates, creativity enervates but the story has no gas. 20-Dec-2021

S1E3. The gay bestie is the only man that gets pretend husband right. Jack was the clown stereotype that exploded. Karen hadn't evolve but she was super bitchy. Grace and Will's beautiful relationship ends when the other sucks the other's partner off on a whim, just like in real life. 10-Dec-2021