All Posts Tagged as 'Mystery'
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Fallen Idol, The (1948)
Ambassador's kid has the run of the mansion and the staff whilst the parents are away. The butler is a hero to the kid because he regales him with stories of how he murdered people in self-defense, allows him treats and spends quality time. Mrs. Butler is a stern enforcer, a mother sub slapper who fries animals and is scary film fun. Butler is having an affair that the child is privy to. The lady is introduced to the boy as the butler's "niece." The three go on outings together. Boy likes niece. Boy is having fun. The boy's slip of the tongue tips Mrs. Butler. She plots. Someone dies. The boy doesn't understand when to lie or tell the truth. The boy's isolation and loneliness happens in big spaces where the adults fuss over him but don't listen to a word he says. Grand camera work boosts everything. It's a trial of a little boy who was fed a pack of lies and whose wrong perception of adult things fucked them all up. 18-Apr-2021
Can a failed secret affair cause a woman temporary insanity? Sure. The film piles plenty of symptoms and Joan Crawford obsesses about inhabiting all of them. She's haunted, Scream Queen, scared, frightful, conniving, confused, grating, bitchy, mother farcical and "don't fuck with me" Joan. She splits every arc into a different character. It was brilliantly insane but it didn't work. The man that made her brain ache played the piano, was a wordmeister, could fuck and always looked tired. He dumps her on the eve of her first hallucination whilst continuing to remain in each other's lives. He's just as crazy as she is except he's not getting diagnosed because he is not a "woman." After being told countless of times that he would never love her, she marries an old rich bastard to get his goat, he "up yours" her by proposing to her stepdaughter and Ms. Joan has a ball going nuts. Unbelievable psychology and too much genre (drama, horror, mystery, crime, comedy, romance, musical, etc.) deflate it.
(People that are crazy don't know they're crazy.) 14-Apr-2021
What Lies Below (2020)
The fun begins as soon as Trey Tucker parts from the water. Mother has a new boyfriend. He's a Hallmark envelope with extra glue to lick. Mother may be feeling the olds but she's fucking Trey Tucker! Get out! Daughter wants a piece of him too! A character becomes obsessed and another gets killed? No? The film's personality zig zags. The fun ends when the film changes outlook and the feelings it previously drudges up don't get finalized. Our investment goes unacknowledged. It explores beyond what it needed to, in a cruel manner. 10-Apr-2021
A beautifully crafted animation about unlocking traditional magic. Two brothers accidentally cast a spell that resurrects half of dad. No head or heart just crotch, ass, legs and feet. He profiles like a predator. It taps their shoes to announce to victims they've been found.
My version: boy triggers a spell that brings complete daddy back. If they want to keep him they have 24 hours to venture out and make it happen. They bond. They have beautiful memories and grand adventures without having to endure memorizing daddy's crotch and ass for 24 hours. Takeoff! Did cartoon daddy walk off the set in a huff? The filmmakers could not realize a finale for us. It was all hearsay. 08-Apr-2021
Another You - Elle King
Deadly Illusions (2021)
Kristin Davis helms an asinine parent who hires a vibrant and stainless nanny to temporarily raise her children whilst she finishes her novel. With the children occupied, mama is able to walk the town freely, jump naked in the pool, smoke cigars, drink and get her labia lip smacked by a teenaged nanny. The sex isn't for exploration. It's cold and unimportant because the sex tease is an excuse to keep us interested and fooled. The nanny spends as much time with the kids as the parents. Where the fuck were those kids? Daddy exists to spill his juice and to pantomime what a real man looks like. It all culminates like "Fatal Attraction" trash with old daddy fighting for his life in a shower, wearing only a towel. Embarrassingly funny. 23-Mar-2021
Juvenile delinquent gets kidnapped and trained to become an Anastasia for a needy wealthy matriarch. If the thieves can gain access to the house and decipher a code they become rich. Helen Hayes adds the sweet and gullible to a grandma that gets conned. Nivens is an adorable elegant servant and awarded a "squishy at any age" merit medal. Foster made it comfortable and joyful to watch her "cowboy up." No Disney princess makeovers for her. The caper is time-sensitive, the action is clunky but the babies gushed and direction allowed everyone the freedom to be who they were. 16-Mar-2021
Moon-Spinners, The (1964)
Disney explores its sexual proclivities. Youngling travels to Crete with doting aunt (she dotes and travels with young succulence in order to elicit a fuck. From anyone!) Virginal child gets entangled in desires, foreign thieves, rapists, connivers and murderers. Girl power privilege in a foreign land. Pola Negri's Madame Habib makes you happy you remained but the caper is silly shit. 04-Mar-2021
Rental, The (2020)
Renting a luxury home owned by white supremacists when there is a minority in the group. The cast met the challenge, relationships were established but the surprise was overdue. It doesn't make sense that it would choose this particular moment to explode. They simplified the monster to avoid an impact. Franco insanity make the colors more vibrant but the director's lack of mythology gave us no reason to care about it.
Next time, go nuts! 01-Mar-2021
Swiss Family Robinson (1960)
Swiss family travel the high seas to claim new land and eco-trash it. Pirates attack their ship as they sleep, all the passengers jump to safety and nobody bothers to awaken them. Were they not liked? They were probably snooty. TG they left an animal farm, nails and enough ammo to kill an army. Shipwrecked. The Ewoks would have barked at the unrealism the family used to erect a tree palace but it's fun Disney magic. As they settle into tranquility the parents ponder the future of their three sons. The boys would inherit nothing without women to love lest they do the animals or worst, each other. A trans boy makes it onto the island and Cain and Abel are awakened to some sexual clarity. It's preposterously gorgeous, impossible, animalistic, adventurous, violent and joyous. 28-Feb-2021
Big Sky (2020-)
It's a pity there is only one John Carroll Lynch and wife and trans. 26-Feb-2021
It looks like John Carroll Lynch is the only one carrying the series forward. Save the girls, give them love dilemmas and have them start a detective agency. Nix Barbie's Angels (wife and slutty BFF,) tone down the mother/son Bates competition and bring on some hot men. Keep hot grandpa and bitchy mother. They have promise. The wife revenge is intriguing. Kill the rest. 13-Dec-2020
Daddy squish competition, ignorant white girls without parents, "mothers are to blame for everything" quotes and smart dialogue. I wasn't shocked at the outcome, I was shocked at the choice. Twin Peaks dream with a nature show I haven't seen before. I'm hooked. 21-Nov-2020
Superman & Lois (2021-)
I dipped in the CW DC waters before and I almost drowned. A loyalty to Superman waved me back. Tyler Hoechlin embodies the dutiful and conflicted alien come to earth to save the loathsome humans from themselves and to birth one or two with a lousy reporter. At least they're boys. Yay! Young boys get a storyline and maybe super powers! Awesome. We are not being ignored. I want to see all the deviant things we can come up with. Super orgasms would be a hilarious start. The sap is extra cum messing up our hair and it has the vibrations of a pusher but I liked the action and was happily surprised. I always wanted to see that. Superman is as boring as the person who recreates him. 25-Feb-2021
Behind Her Eyes (2021-)
The mini spells out the psychology of feminists and LGBTQs. 23-Feb-2021
Sexually electric and tediously mysterious with slam bam finalization. A gay man has equal right to employ trickery to nab the giant cis man of a woman's dream. 23-Feb-2021
Great, The (2020-)
This is the gangster version of Bridgerton. Emperor Peter, not The Great (that was his father) marries an empty pocket princess (Catherine,) devirginizes her without proper fantasy protocol and improper rapey penetration and provokes a sexual political war. The emperor was a child playing with a power befitting its time and privy to men and offensive to everyone. Catherine wanted all of that. Nicholas Hoult's cunt is a fascinating watch. You don't want to fuck him but you kinda do until he does something disgusting again and then it's off which makes him curl into a ball and makes you want to hug him. Good job, dude. Elle Fanning owned her virginity as much as she flaunted it. Slutdom was the key to achieving a turn in power. The comedy is harsh, the actors are yum and the politics are like ours. 13-Feb-2021
Framing Britney Spears (2021)
Britney is the golden bird whose wings were snapped so she wouldn't fly the coop and stop laying golden eggs. She flew the coop because people were perceiving who she was whilst nodding and ignoring everything she said. Without its subject, the doc is elementary. Britney's loss of freedom is hurtful. The doc didn't have the budget to solve the issue but it scattered clues for us to count. A conservatorship was assigned because she was willing to gift her fortune to someone else? That's scary. We don't want Britney in the streets. Daddy is monstrous. Where's mom? 10-Feb-2021