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All Posts Tagged as 'Cliche'

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Golden Bachelor, The (2023) Woof

Fuckboy! 01-Dec-2023
Daddy couldn't help himself from trying the new luggage he won on Let's Make A Deal. He showed Leslie how wires helped him move around the house and bestowed on Theresa, only sexual regard. 20-Nov-2023
Daddy gold was forced to walk and run, though I believe the run was CGI'd. Gerry was very vague when discussing how he felt about Theresa to her grandchildren and daughter. When he eye fucked Theresa's daughter she reacted like she liked it. I'm sure she wasn't listening to anything he was saying because he was saying that he wasn't in love with her mother. Either he let the cat out of the bag or he's a better actor than I thought. I ponder why Gerry is called Gary when it should be Jerry. 03-Nov-2023
Palmer didn't eyefuck anybody because he wasn't alone with them. Oh well, there's still paradise. Is the show on realtime? Do they walkie talkie what the public thinks to the producers? They made daddy walk. He only walked a few steps but every time he asked to walk a girl out he was holding on to them for dear life. When he opened the car door for a dumped, the producers rigged his suit jacket to hold him up. Good wire work. If talking about your ex on a first date is rude, why does it get a pass in old age? We found out that daddy is not made of gold, he bruises whenever a woman touches him. Maybe, she's made of fire. 27-Oct-2023
What pickle ball means: Age deteriorates the quality of the vegetable, but rarely causes them to actually become unsafe for consumption IMO. Pickling is used to preserve foods and in the environment of brine, they last pretty well forever. That said, the texture and flavorings are going to get funky after a couple of years. 20-Oct-2023
Whilst the ladies were slapping old man's balls our daddy gold was sitting. When he appeared on an ATV he sat throughout. He made out with any lips that came towards him, sitting down. The rose ceremony took much longer because daddy had to sit after every rose. He pretended to be a gentleman but we know the handicapped woman helped him walk out. That lady whose daughter was getting married as she was clapping balls didn't give two shits. Mother is not a title but an action. I'm sure the son-in-law was relieved she wasn't there to fuck up his wedding. Becoming ill was karma. Not telling women playing I've Never... that she was milk intolerant was like going to an orgy and having sex with everybody whilst knowing you have crabs. Captain Sandy with a wig has munched on ladies before but is a bottom, now. A judge Judy superfan told another contestant to ziploc her joy. 20-Oct-2023
I tuned in because I wanted to survey the old hunk. There is no way a 72 year old can look that good. He's handsome, a people pleaser, tastes like Spanish Fly and wants to fuck. He proved his age when it took him about twenty minutes to put on his shoes. Good editing. Wink, wink. There were no Goldiggers amongst the 20 but I noticed a few madams and ex whores. Including younglings would have created the tension women of that age experience. Most of the elder women were loopy, defining an era that's no longer safe. I like Ellen. I don't know why but I do. One of the women looked like Captain Sandy in a black wig, the Maude impressionist was kicked out, Jesse eye-fucked the bachelor and I felt grandpa's burden. Every time he votes out an eccentric aunt, America will judge him. "The man is dumping grannies!" 30-Sep-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Cliche, Crapfun, Creepy, Drama, Enthusiastic, Mat, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Romance, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Timid, Trashy, Warbly, Weird, Writ Funny

Filed under: TV

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01-Dec-2023


Hole In The Ground, The (2019) Arf

Single mother starts a new life with her son in the boondocks. Woods are spooky with a giant hole in the ground. Baby boy disappears into the woods and returns different. A neighbor's history tells of a mother falling apart at losing her son to the woods, going to prison, killing her son and being constantly haunted. She becomes deranged, unacceptable but tolerated. No one believes her truth because all nutty people are considered liars. But the nutty people are always right. We don't want to look at that shit so we ignore it, the way we don't Santa and Barbie. Mama believes the lady's mythology until she too faces that dilemma. The child is a spooky chill, the mother's face speaks volumes and the director allows us space to breathe. Cliches disrupt the flow. Dreams no longer surprise. The end was a meh and a what. Craft without sense. 29-Nov-2023

Tags: 2010s, Accidental Watch, Baby Wrecks, Chemistry, Cliche, Coincidence Laden, Creepy, Director Movement, Fun, Good Acting, Horror, Music Swings, Mystery, Sentimental, Weird, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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29-Nov-2023


Blue Beetle (2023) Bites

The pace had no time to set-up character appreciation, it had a billion particles to settle. The family dynamic was food, drink, celebration and insanity. George Lopez added comedy schtick to his act. He looked like a character booted from Bedrock because he was too loud and ornery. The breast queen should be playing Lady MacBeth not becoming a free TV actor. I can see her washing blood from her hands and implementing Elvira's cleavage cut. The rest of the family and the leads apply stereotypes without explaining them. There is no such thing as a stereotype because it's only a description of our heritage. Universal speak. Nobody passed the classic TV Q test and the silliness hardly stopped. The best of the mythology turned into a fiesta. The family went everywhere together. Really? When did they masturbate? Why did the family get superpowers? Beetle's nemesis was a bigger and badder version of himself. Couldn't we have gotten something a little different? If the production wanted to fill the female quota, why didn't they concoct some awesome female villains? He has lots and no villain is scarier than a latin woman scorned. She'll slash your tires. 27-Nov-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Comedy, Cultural, Depressing, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Enthusiastic, Fatigue, Over the Top, Physical Humor, Predictable, Preposterous, Relationships, Repetitive, Revenge, Sap, Shrill Act, Timid, Trashy, TV-like, Vague, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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27-Nov-2023


Scream (2022) Arf

I was surprised by the comedy horror tag. I saw nothing funny except for all the situations that put Ortega in harm's way. She was one of the bright things.The ghost costume needs an upgrade. The voice actor for Ghostface sounded like a harmless prototype. It's nice to remember the past but it didn't adhere to logic. The newbies were social media born and nothing more. I applaud Neve for bringing her original face and showing us she can act. She looked great. Cruel deaths are only delegated to males. The director did well with horror but the wink, wink trivia isn't cool anymore. That joke only works once then it becomes annoying. 13-Nov-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, Brutal, Cliche, Conspiracy Theory, Daddy Squish, Director Experiment, Drama, Fatigue, Horror, Preposterous, Sequel, Star Watt, Timid, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

Filed under: Movies

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13-Nov-2023


Bachelor In Paradise (2014 - ) Arf

What have I done? The producers made daddy Palmer look like one of the weird kids from The Polar Express. His eyes didn't move, they dialed down the light, the sparkle and he started looking through people, not at them. My apologies, sir. 12-Nov-2023
Oh no! I think the show is on realtime. The new girl said Brayden looked like Johnny Depp, nobody threw anything in the ocean and worst of all, they restricted daddy Palmer's cornea movements! No more eye fucking. They cut away just as soon as tears started to stream down his face. 04-Nov-2023
Mr. Palmer is a faithful husband. He only eyefucks men. It was fun to see Wells eat his burrito, though. Somebody looked like they were going to join a supremacist group after getting dumped. Brayden is a pirate that has all the women aflutter. Can all the girls fuck him and dump him so I can stop obsessing about him? Were asses covered up because they pooped themselves or because we might get excited? Yo, you can't be the fairer sex if you believe everything a man says. Kat's birthday cake looked nasty. Why are these people allowed to throw anything into the ocean? Doesn't she know that Flipper can get diabetes? 28-Oct-2023
Woohoo! The Palmer eye-fucked the newbie in an episode where not much happened. If you're demanding honesty from a man, don't do it like Kat. She hates the truth. 23-Oct-2023
Brayden's beauty suffers intense consequences because he can't deliver. Sean looks like a dream prince that Dreamworks dreamed up. There is no rational reason why Will should act sensitive when being dumped. Aaron needs to butt fuck his girl so she can stay regular and alive. She is a walking testament of why travel sucks. Wells is a cute package that the contestants keep unwrapping. He was icked by the baby incident and masterclassed he wasn't. He gleamed for Dreamworks but was bored with pretty head yet bounced back for latino flair. The theme is past promises made to people they weren't attracted to and the people who can't accept it. Jesse Palmer hasn't eye-fucked anyone and that's worrisome. They're so good. Men only! The thighs are wide, the legs are nice, the men have bite, are succulent and falling apart for trying to make someone else happy. Is this how toxic masculinity is created? 18-Oct-2023

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Accidental Watch, Bad Acting, Chemistry, Choices, Cliche, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Emasculating, Fantasy, Fun Acting, Gay, Good Acting, Grating, Hot Swatch, Hyper, Juvenile, LGBTQ, Lifestyle, Maddening, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preposterous, Reality, Relationships, Romance, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Timid, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

Filed under: TV

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12-Nov-2023


Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse (2023) Woof

I've never met a Puerto Rican that talks like Miles. Even though he's half the race he would never retain his father's accent because no Puerto Rican mother would allow it. He lives like a Puerto Rican. By the way, we are more than platanos and empanadas. We also love pork, rice, fried everything, chicken, fish, beef, chinese food, lasagne, pizza, anything and beans. If the father is black and the mother is Puerto Rican where did the Morales name come from? Bad Bunny, Ricky Martin and Izzy from Love is Blind S5 are great examples of Puerto Rican speak. At least when white people did it they tried to sound like us. Peter Parker sounded like a dork flake. The first half abused a soundtrack that distorted musicology. It played like a 45 on repeat. Keeping up with the psychological speed was phenomenal, the art was crisp and when the musical score interrupted the playlist, it didn't suck. If your child itches, this is a classic, the others might become anxious. 02-Nov-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, Action Fun, Animation, Cliche, Comic Book, Crapfun, Director Movement, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Fatigue, Open Ending, Over the Top, Romance, SciFi, Sentimental, Words Spoke, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight

Filed under: Movies

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02-Nov-2023


AHS: Delicate (2023) Whimper

S1E1. Big K is horrific and almost interesting. Emma Roberts is avoiding the camera, lest it tell something. She only understands ditzy blonde characters. The idea is a respectful homage but production keeps hurting it. Fantastical coincidences are painful recreations and hallucinatory effects are weak. We can only concentrate on one big thing at a time. Ryan always wanders. It seems like we're counting down until a stand-in with plastic taped to her butt, creates the illusion that we are witnessing and recording K's magnificence, naked. 27-Sep-2023

Tags: 2020s, Bad Acting, Cliche, Disappointment, Horror, Preposterous, Silly, Timid, Writ For Short Attn Spans

Filed under: TV

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27-Sep-2023


Fear In The Night (1972) Arf

Angelic training makes a wife susceptible to malice because they are mentally unstable. Legends of art accelerated the drama. The table turn was sweet and the film wasn't a horrible waste of time. 22-Jul-2023

Tags: 1970s, Accidental Watch, Chemistry, Cliche, Crapfun, Disappointment, Drama, Funny, Sort of, Horror, Horror Mild, Predictable, Preposterous, Psychological, Relationships, Scare Obvious, Silly, Suspense, Timid, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Thoughtful

Filed under: Movies

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22-Jul-2023


Fantastic Four (2005) Arf

If you left kernels at the bottom of the popcorn bucket, expecting the movie to pop them, it does not. The origin story is deprived of force because of its oversimplification. Only three members achieved not looking foolish in their embodiments. Chris Evans steals everything with his bad boy swag, partial nudity and up to your imagination charm. Michael Chiklis was turned to brick, his eyes the main conveyor and I felt him. Kerry Washington was brave to enact being blind and fucking a brick dick. Ion Gruffud was chosen from a dork photo line-up. Jessica Alba decided to go bronze skin with blonde hair which is irrelevant to who she's portraying. I always envisioned Sue Storm as a mature-minded leader. Every breath Alba shared, purred, "I'm sexy, are you going to marry me or what?" According to the film, Sue Storm has no reason to powerfully exist except to stop traffic, plea for love, get undressed and be invisible. She's no Barbara Bain. Julian Macmahon's Dr. Doom made my popcorn explode with a whimper. He acted like he was in a live comic book written by those Power Rangers people. He cheapened the film. The film is more excited about what effects can do than establishing a purpose for a character's existence. Action is in a rush to move on and be forgotten. Its enjoyable but "let's put it in the kids' dvd section, for now. 16-Jun-2023

Tags: 2000s, Action, By the Numbers, Camp, Cheeky Acting, Cliche, Comic Book, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Funny, Sort of, Grating, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Preposterous, Silly, Star Watt, Timid, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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16-Jun-2023


Muted (2023-) WhimperEarly Exit

As soon as I confused the boyfriend with the main character, I booked. Dude, I thought his marks were fake. Wow, he looked better in the past. Boo, I just insulted a person. They were both lovelies. I was watching on a different wavelength. I didn't want to have to rethink my imaginary flashbacks. The lady in charge of investigation hinted that it was schlock anyway. 31-May-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Cliche, Crime Drama, Drama, Early Exit, Gay, LGBTQ, Mystery, Pretty, Sexy, Star Watt, Tedium, Timid, Trashy, Warbly, Weird

Filed under: TV

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31-May-2023


3,000 Years Of Longing (2022) Whimper

It seems like a private joke to portray different languages without captioning them. The more times the movie lines or references are repeated the more we can understand and retain it. It's an educational tool. The descriptions fall mainly on Elba who portrays a physically commanding djinn with poetic romanticism with no woman to match him. Swinton's acting nuances become mismatched ticks. Queen of Shiba's story was the most interesting only because the actress portraying her provided model fabulosity. The leads remain within bottle safety throughout. The effects don't want to intrude on realism but that's what the story is about. I wanted to see Elba mixing spells, looking dashing or at least happy and having a magic ball while reciting Shakespeare with Lady Tilton. 23-May-2023

Tags: 2020s, Cliche, Daddy Squish, Director Slouch, Fantasy, Fatigue, Inactivity, Predictable, Relationships, Repetitive, Romance, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Tedium, Timid, Unenthusiastic, Weird, Wit Crack, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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23-May-2023


Antman & The Wasp: Quantumania (2023) Whimper

Cuteness and self congratulations does not befit these superpowered saviors. It rehashes helicopter dad and rebellious vigilante super daughter, predictably and unattached. Paul Rudd looked confused. The daughter misses being a good thing because she is stereotyped. MODOK looked like a badly stretched photo. The Quantum Realm was a mishmash of background paintings with no movement or the dulcet tones of Bob Ross. The inhabitants are the rejected drawings of cantina ideas for all the Star Wars films. The director applied the cutesies to an alien slime that cutely spoke. Good job actor, but there is nothing cute about talking jello. Pfeiffer tackled her heroism with gusto even though the words sounded exhausted. Chemistry was beginning to form between her and Kang. They should have played that out as a Part 1. The support was alert but there was too much realm and rah rah rah. The purpose of this pilot movie was to introduce Kang so it can comfortably occupy more room in the tie-ins. Majors hits all the right notes but Kang is underwritten and easily beaten. 18-May-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, By the Numbers, Cliche, Coincidence Laden, Cold, Daddy Squish, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Drama, Fatigue, Repetitive, SciFi, Silly, Star Watt, Timid, Writer Weakness

Filed under: Movies

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18-May-2023


Summer House (2017-) WhimperUpgradeArf

Carl's fit had him climbing uphill so we could admire his bulbous crotch. All the boys served morning bulge with Kyle supplying a little bit extra. Ciara was being a can't by flirting vociferously with that roommate's helium boyfriend. The helium boyfriend came to bed with his crotch in an elephant's trunk so Ciara could feel reciprocated. There is absolutely no reason for Paige to do any work when there are two strong black women in the room. Paige threw up when she found out that Craig was crying because he missed his mother's birthday. She cannot relate to non-toxicity. Carl didn't face his ex and put a kabash to the drama because then he might have had to smack Lindsay for putting him in that situation. Lindsay's idea of a good marriage is wrastling her alligator to the ground and keeping other vagina (meat) away from him. Chris' latest grooming trick is the Titanic wraparound. Slut. 15-May-2023
The episode reiterated that Carl is gifted with his hands. Carl's mother didn't show up because she is over fake things. That other roommate confirmed it. Danielle thinks that Spielberg is still holding auditions for West Side Story's Anita. She was part of a throuple but only wanted singularity... with Carl. The giant decided to put his hands on a more successful product and edged her out. She's devastated because she will never feel giant's knuckles again. He's putting his ring somewhere else. Is it customary to make the latin women serve white people at a proposal party? It might be if they're nuts. Trust me, it's good to keep them busy when they're coo coo. Lindsay pointed out that Ciara's red lipstick made her look like a frog. You mean like the Princess and the...? 09-May-2023
Carl asks Lindsay to be his co-dependent. Samantha joined the series to fuck. Danielle acts like she made a pinky pact with Carl. He won't marry until she's perused every man on earth. He was her back-up. Chris Leoni joined the show to see how many straight men he could turn. He's getting very close. Amanda, be well. 03-May-2023
Happy Birthday, Kyle. The giant sprayed his fumes on Lindsay and it almost knocked her out of bed. Lindsay choked on a cheeto, explaining why Carl thinks he has a big dick. Ciara found another reason to hate other women. Men. Danielle is in everyone's business because her boyfriend is busy with his own. The only way Danielle is ever going to spend more time with the chef is to work for him. She'll get first dibs at his carrot and mayonnaise dip before the staff gobbles it up. 04-Apr-2023
Dude, either the giant's hands are really getting smaller or his prosthetics fell off. 15-Mar-2023
Is dating Lindsay making the giant's hands smaller? 12-Mar-2023
Kyle had a right to voice his opinion about Carl and suffer for it, if need be. Kyle did not admit anything that Big Hands hadn't. People must suffer the consequences of their actions. The argument is solely among the men. Business has no friends. Danielle confused loyalty for reality. She spent most of the episode pissed off and snitching because she couldn't enforce how she feels to a man whose opinion matters because it is what it is. Amanda is looking 60s fresh and I'm admiring it. Chris made it Ricky Martin obvious that his bro date with Kyle meant more to him than ever seeing a chick again. The ladies have a "no ass fuck" rule. They should take the long out of term. 01-Mar-2023
I think Kyle's love handle winked at me. Mullet is a no no. Go Tarzan so I can pull it. Big hands is portraying why Ben Affleck looks miserable in public. 14-Feb-2023

Tags: 2010s, Camp, Cliche, Fake, Fatigue, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Incomprehensible, Juvenile, Overcooked, Reality, Relationships, Shrill Act, Tacky, Weird

Filed under: TV

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15-May-2023


Summit Fever (2022) Arf

I was bracing for another Fall experience but no vertigo set in. It had to be the shots. Above and below shots were seldom. The camera moved sideways as much as possible, as if they too were afraid of heights. The purpose for the drama is always the same, like the tragedy that inspired it. The pretty cast gave more than what we got. The story rises out of its standard issue to flesh out characters so the performers can deliver while they stall. It's petrifying in a very safe space. An ass prince shows up in winter/apocalyptic clothing, head to toe. They couldn't wait for summer? 20-Mar-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Action, Chemistry, Cliche, Daddy Squish, Director Slouch, Drama, Fatigue, Funny, Sort of, Horror Mild, Pretty, Relationships, Sentimental, Sports, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Timid, Words Spoke

Filed under: Movies

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20-Mar-2023


Love Trip: Paris (2023-) Whimper

Wherein privileged American ladies travel abroad and are shocked that their toxic love speaks other languages. Mirko's storyline profiled him as a panty shredder. That was such a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles rip. 02-Mar-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Bad Acting, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Comfort Food, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Funny, Gay Swatch, Juvenile, LGBTQ, Lifestyle, Overcooked, Questionable, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Silly, Stupid Funny

Filed under: TV

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02-Mar-2023




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