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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Cliche'

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Batman, The (2022) Arf

The Batman is the only character that suits up. How lonely for him. He's always the freak. The support enact realistic iterations of characters that lit up Batman's mythology to absolutely no effect. The Riddler is a demented teen who was brought up by an unfunny father who worked the mines. The riddles were blah. There is no Riddler without a tight body suit, a tight body and demented cynicism. Daddy Farrell wasted a lot of time in makeup, creating art out of a role that doesn't belong. He is not penguin. I didn't see any top hats, monocles or bullet umbrellas. Michelle Pfeiffer's reign as the best film Catwoman cannot be extinguished. Zoe is an everyday gorgeous girl not a cat. Her cowl is just as cheap and unintelligible as I expected. Her lack of meow hurts. Commissioner Gordon was a lackey. Everything was eeeeewww and he was always waiting for Batman to finish things up for him. Daddy Turturro knew exactly what the director wanted and gave it to us. Alfred and Bruce's interaction was rude. The parental bond was cold. Why hire an Aunt Harriet if she's not going to be an Aunt Harriet? That might have been fun. Oops. Sorry. Fun not allowed. The Twins were cute. Robert Pattinson is the glue you want to stick to because he makes you ponder how his beautifully broken humanity can create life from something he hates. I saw love in Zoe's face when she looked at him. I saw panty dropping aloofness register from his. Batman's narration doesn't mesh with toxic revenge. The moments he celebrated were my cringe. This isn't Batman. He doesn't laud himself or others. He's a lonely motherfucker that hates the world because he lost mommy and daddy to crime and got stuck in a mansion with a pervy butler. Batman's detective work failed from a lack of gadget magic. Yeah! Rich angry fucks love gadgets. Matt Reeves strikes potent pictures but was entrapped by a franchise that is petrified of its origins. The man/woman who gives us comic book Batman with realistic choices will become King of The World. What's the point of hiding in the shadows if everyone can hear you? 18-Apr-2022

Tags: 2020s, Action, Cliche, Comic Book, Director Movement, Gay Swatch, Mystery, Psychological, Sentimental, Star Watt, Thriller, Too Long, TV-like, Weird, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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18-Apr-2022


King Richard (2021) Whimper

Strict father manipulates the sporting world into driving his daughters to legendary. Working your child like a horse is an investment in greatness if it gains you wealth but a questionable tactic if daddy applies it to chores. Will Smith's Mr. Williams was a hero who broke his daughters' backs, peddled them for attention and talked about tennis, all day long. Yes, his speak was most intolerable. Aunjanue Ellis registered strong heart as a neglected wife. Jehovah's Witnesses don't say god or church. I wasn't allowed to. Interjections of woke history lend it fable qualities. If the women are so great, why is this foolish man speaking for them? 25-Mar-2022

Tags: 2020s, Art Devoid, Bio, By the Numbers, Camp, Chemistry, Cliche, Drama, Star Watt, Timid, Vague, Words Spoke

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25-Mar-2022


Privilege, The (2022) Bites

Stupid horror flex in another language with cute twinx. Nope. 11-Feb-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Art Devoid, Cliche, Dialogue Lament, Director Experiment, Drama, Fatigue, Foreign, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Lesbian, SciFi, Silly, Slow, Twinkie, Weird

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11-Feb-2022


Candyman (2021) No Moons

Non-movie illustration of why "Oscar So White" is still so prevalent. Candyman is stripped of sensual ferocity, opinion and reason. His myth is re-written and implied by puppetry because the talent wasn't inspired to showcase it. The scares couldn't unhinge a cockroach. The deaths are remote with closeup shots of thick red Kool-aid. The violence is hesitant because most black people are petrified of supernatural violence. It scratches the ghetto but refuses to live in it because black people don't want to return there. Whites have gentrified the ghetto and blacks are mad as hell because they weren't given enough time to make their home livable. "Welfare knocked on my door before I had a chance to straighten up." "Bitch, you know white people can't watch good land go to waste." Blacks with dedication and drive enjoy the gentrified lifestyle while critiquing their hosts and avoiding the nasty parts of their neighborhood. This is all supposed to tie in with a confusing Candyman revenge backstory. The candy was uninspired. It should have looked scrumptious and colorful. It looked like granny's recycled Christmas candy. Only fat kids pick that shit up. It wasn't woke enough to have Colman Domingo fuck Candyman. The film required more gays so Candyman could kill the two. Too bad. In what world are there more cops in the neighborhood than community? 31-Jan-2022

Tags: 2020s, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, Cliche, Coincidence Laden, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Gay Swatch, Horror, Indecipherable, Political, Predictable, Preposterous, Repetitive, Retread, Silly, Tacky, Timid, Writer Weakness

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31-Jan-2022