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Movies Posts Tagged as 'Timid Effects'
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They made us wait forever to see the man with the sculpted buns, they mimicked the mythology instead of enacting it, the lack of words made it easier to hide but hard to understand. They took a sample of what often occurs with a man beast and concocted a film. Samples can't describe the complete picture. It moves slow, the child is soulless, the wife doesn't matter, and daddy is one-note. Daddy is goofy happy and abusively angry. I recommend that Kit and his buns of stone make a better movie elsewhere. 31-Oct-2024
F4: Rise Of The Silver Surfer (2007) 
I'm not sure but I think they neutered the Silver Surfer. I remember having seen the film during it's time and I noticed one. I don't forget crotches. The whole feels cheaper. Johnny lost his appeal and became vapid. Sue Storm continued to be listless and unheroic with a crappy blonde wig. Kerry Washington's blind brick lover was under-appreciated. The Thing was sort of plastic. Mr. Fantastic's powers were mostly comic relief and unbelievable. When Torch gains extra powers, it's fun but when "you know who" returns as Dr. Doom all is gloom. Galactus was a no-show because nobody knew how to incorporate a bigger thing than god into the real world. Really? A Galactus that was bigger than Thanos sitting on a throne commanding his slave, Silver Surfer, to destroy so he could feed, is brilliant. 17-Jul-2023
Jeepers Creepers Reborn (2022) 
An abortion would have served it right. Black men are not fanatical about visiting voodoo stores and doing horror cosplay. It brings bad mojo. He would have shat his pants. Is anyone aware that the Creeper is a sexual deviant that kills teenage girls and devours soft boys? He wouldn't give two shits about a girl, especially an old one. A pervert with a penchant for boys made him, the Creeper should be illustrated as such. 03-Feb-2023
This is an almost horror classic because it built good character relationships but sidestepped showing us the horror. Most scares evolved from the predicament of the main characters which added some suspense but the director was afraid to delve into action. Too bad. We all missed out. 29-Mar-2021
It takes you to a place superhero blockbusters rarely do. It analyzes how a superpower awakening affects everyday chores, emotions and people for better or worst. You can get yourself some cash, gain a lot of respect, kill a few people, cause a ruckus and wonder how it integrates with a personal life. The villains are born from misunderstanding and rejection. The heroes are thrust forward for its mistakes. I wish they had been granted the effects that the story aspired to but the message zapped through. 01-Oct-2020
Jumanji: The Next Level (2019)
It looks like the same level to me. There is a wisp of outrageous hilarity that ensues when we first hear Dwayne and Kevin attempt new accents, but it vanishes as soon as you sober up. There is only so much failure you can laugh at. I sat down in my boxers to get actioned up and ended up with shredded panties. There was so much sap that the pancakes runneth over. 15-Apr-2020
A vague bad trip made sillier by insignificant EFX. Even though his American accent was flawless, McGregor was clamping down so hard on his own that he lost his squishiness. Ryan Gosling hadn't found his squish yet... he was a serious actor. His blank stares were very blank. They gave little credence to Naomi Watts' character except to provide her great face at the end. 08-Mar-2020
It takes its cues from "Carrie" without employing a director's bag of tricks. India Eisley's beauty is evident at first glance so there is no launch metamorphosis. Her Maria should ignite uncontrollable rage and attack from boys not bullying and insecurity. The mirror is where many tricks could have been deployed but minute experimentation and bad editing keep it cold and non-dimensional. The daddy seduction is a successful creep that doesn't consummate, explanations are not forthcoming, the bully gets no follow-up, mama is useless and the writers employed little sense. 13-Oct-2019
Gods and goddesses blessed with magical resources and riches hide under a celestial bubble fighting for their survival but sharing very little of it with the world and the neighbors they seem to emulate.
The accents waver, the muscle is weak and the girls fare better but not by much. The beauty of color keeps it alive but the 70's mod and religious adherence bring it outmoded corniness.
I celebrate its political success as I await to see an ethnic hero that embodies the film world with the same grace as its counter does. We have to start somewhere. 24-Jun-2018
The accents waver, the muscle is weak and the girls fare better but not by much. The beauty of color keeps it alive but the 70's mod and religious adherence bring it outmoded corniness.
I celebrate its political success as I await to see an ethnic hero that embodies the film world with the same grace as its counter does. We have to start somewhere. 24-Jun-2018