Movies Posts Tagged as 'Coincidence Laden'
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Glass Onion (2022)

Daniel Craig returns to torture southern accents and be a dork. Janelle Monae acted better with an accent but not so much as herself. She needs an injection of actor vulnerability. Kathryn Hahn is still a witch. I couldn't see Leslie Odom Jr. and Jessica Henwick through all that glass. Hollywood never took advantage that Kate Hudson is her mother's doppelganger. Bautista was full on daddy and Edward Norton deserves a comeback. Elements of the whodunnit were clever but the whole was overblown. 23-Dec-2022
Hush (2016)

It's a horror slasher that believes it shouldn't have to explain why a killer kills. He just does. It's a lack of opinion and a loss for art. A perspective from a person with capabilities would have created a nicer balance. Mask off created no tension or tingles. SPOILER ALERT: It wasn't Brad Pitt. The mask was more effective. All was slasher cohesion with no heart attacks. 20-Dec-2022
Candyman (2021)

Non-movie illustration of why "Oscar So White" is still so prevalent. Candyman is stripped of sensual ferocity, opinion and reason. His myth is re-written and implied by puppetry because the talent wasn't inspired to showcase it. The scares couldn't unhinge a cockroach. The deaths are remote with closeup shots of thick red Kool-aid. The violence is hesitant because most black people are petrified of supernatural violence. It scratches the ghetto but refuses to live in it because black people don't want to return there. Whites have gentrified the ghetto and blacks are mad as hell because they weren't given enough time to make their home livable. "Welfare knocked on my door before I had a chance to straighten up." "Bitch, you know white people can't watch good land go to waste." Blacks with dedication and drive enjoy the gentrified lifestyle while critiquing their hosts and avoiding the nasty parts of their neighborhood. This is all supposed to tie in with a confusing Candyman revenge backstory. The candy was uninspired. It should have looked scrumptious and colorful. It looked like granny's recycled Christmas candy. Only fat kids pick that shit up. It wasn't woke enough to have Colman Domingo fuck Candyman. The film required more gays so Candyman could kill the two. Too bad. In what world are there more cops in the neighborhood than community? 31-Jan-2022
Red Notice (2021)

Red Notice fulfills "land of magic" type escapism. The writers created an intriguing caper and an enigmatic cast to play act it. Gal Gadot can act. Well. Daddy King Rock delighted in being the brunt of a joke, constantly, in fabulous fashion. Dickwad Reynolds steals it by being a cantankerous benevolent criminal who is also Deadpool. The director took advantage of its DCU historical significance and developed some solid characters. Heart tug. 11-Jan-2022
Wasteland, The (2021)

I can't identify with a child that wakes his parents up so daddy can walk him to the latrine which is terrifyingly one block away. To piss. Why didn't he just piss in any corner of the house except where mama hangs laundry? It debates whether parents should compromise a boy's sensitivity by forcing him to become a man if the times deem it necessary. It's a future where woke people are forced to eat animals named Fluffy to survive. Suicidal grandpa daddy grants himself an early reprieve by getting a conscious in between bouts of "I don't give a shit! and "I want to die!" Daddy did not deserve a vacation. Mother madness is spooky with minimal slaps and torture towards children. She did good with killing animals, though. I didn't understand it. "The monster is made of trees, branches and bad lighting, maybe. You imagined the whole thing. You're just like us. Nuts." The child riled us up but the director couldn't grant us a reason for any of it. 08-Jan-2022
He's All That (201)

Pleasant nothingness of youth. 06-Oct-2021
We Can Be Heroes (2020)

It's a kid's film. There are kids in it. It looks like candy. It's stupid. You mean brilliant stupid? No I mean silly stupid. 29-Dec-2020
Da 5 Bloods (2020)

Four American vets return to Nam to pay homage to a fallen comrade and loot forgotten gold. Lee celebrates the culture and panders heavily to an aggressive media. Details are only heightened when its beautiful score stops waterboarding. It is only then that the daddies' concrete work is illuminated, the story gets a lift and though Lee is scattered, the drama delivers some insight. Do trees sap in the woods? Yes, indeed. 15-Jun-2020