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Love Is Blind (2020) Howl

Dude, the thigh lord has Sith powers. I haven't stopped eating the insides of my mouth since I last saw him. 19-Oct-2023
Reunion. It was lonely and hollow. Izzy's thigh was not in full display but the women's legs and boobies were. Uche stalks Milton, now. Lydia is laughing and planning something hysterical. Aaliyah came to put Lydia on the spot for lying and showing off. Milton's family wardens like Lydia, now. They figured getting her to be them so she can change him is easier than showing emotions. Credit Report Princess makes no sense. She's blaming a thigh lord for wanting the same things she wants. His lost and found are memories of trying on girly things so he can relate. JP needs to visit Amish country. Taylor looked fabulous but her make-up was doubled. One layer would have made her shine. She chose to sparkle. The only reason to watch was Izzy. The fake smile and congratulations had a slow-mo effect at the reunion. As soon as he did anything inside his mouth the camera turned away. He rocked some cool sock, though. 16-Oct-2023
The latin mothers were in sync masterclassing a mother that doesn't exist. Izzy ate the insides of his mouth one more time and I wanted to be Ant-Man swirling in it. Didn't it seem like the credit report princess' parents were trying to unload her? Is Lydia still stalking Uche? 14-Oct-2023
S5E8-E9. Uche was invited to the party to make Lydia squirm. Lydia turned red and became a giant animated monster. She emoted so distinctly it almost felt real. I liked it better when it was blamed on hysteria rather than on emotion. Emotions are supposed to be good. Why did Milton's parents look so guilty? Did they look her up? Did Uche call the family to tell them how wonderful she is and fucked up? Is he texting Milton every half hour? Milton kept excusing his parents' lack of hospitality on organics. They weren't like Lydia's. They spit hate in your face and can't teach their offspring how to open wine bottles. Lydia's restraint and self food service was worth bowing to. Mother and daughter-in-law swept her from her pasta and dragged her to the interrogation room where they showed off their warden skills. Lydia studied rocks most of her life but couldn't comprehend the word minute. Minute, when something is way smaller than the rest, like sand is to rock. The thigh jedi and his assignment enacted what bi-polar looks like. Izzy was drunk, frisky and adorable. She started a kitchen argument because he wanted to make love and she needed more attention. Guess who won? He lost control. His legs shook constantly, even when on a great date. Oh. That's how he keeps his thighs in shape. She made him cry like a puppy. We witnessed the aftermath of his secret. He started eating the insides of his mouth, again. I'm sure he ate more than the cameras cared to show. He can't afford to buy her a handbag! He needs to update his profile, "looking for suga mamas and papas that like perfect thigh." 06-Oct-2023
S5. There is a thigh jedi in the house. He's too good to be true. He keeps forcing smiles, though. Is someone buzzing him? His to be is a spoiled princess that wants old fashioned notions and female empowerment in a man. There is something he's not telling that is screaming to come out. The father-in-law expressed a gangster welcome with a threat. Whenever the princess emotes he eats the inside of his mouth. When they were in the kitchen arguing about how poor he's going to become, I thought he was going to eat right through and damage his beautiful face with a hole. In bed one night, he almost eyerolled his assignment/princess but caught himself in time. When a man says he wants a woman to wear no makeup. He wants her to be a little girl. That's the reason women wear makeup, to distinguish themselves from their daughters, so daddy doesn't take a special interest in them. It's like fucking another woman. Uche is making it known that Lydia is a stalker with a big mouth, doesn't allow much breathing room and has a suspicious mama. I think Uche proved himself stupid by stalking three people throughout the show. 17-Apr-2023

Tags: Bad Acting, Corn, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preachy, Questionable, Reality, Relationships, Religion, Sex, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Travel, Wig Crack, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Thoughtful

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19-Oct-2023


Black Mirror (2023-) Arf

S6E1. Joan Is Awful is fun until buffoonery steps in. I refused to change my brain frequency to understand it. S6E2. Diversity appeared out of sorts in a Scottish mystery that was dull, basic and predictable. I couldn't wait for it to end. E3. Beyond the Sea. I didn't have to pretend my mathematical rationality was misfiring. Perfectly constructed and understandable. The actors leant it broadway huff and puff. The watts illuminated emotional longing. Aaron Paul had an opportunity to steal and he took it, succeeding in hosting more than one spirit. Josh Hartnett plugs sweaty emotion into an astronaut whose reason for life has ended. Kate Mara is an other. The era suits Mara and her beautiful chops. S6E4. Mazey Day. Resembling Brittney Spears is not reason enough to grant a stranger mercy. S6E5. Trash that you shuck out the window after inspecting it. Beyond The Sea was the exception to mediocrity. It was great. 18-Jun-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Chemistry, Daddy Squish, Drama, Good Acting, Horror, Predictable, Questionable, Revenge, Sci-Fi, Silly, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Timid, Vague, Words Spoke, Writ Thoughtful

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19-Jun-2023


Love Is Blind (2020) Howl

Reunion. Kwame was looking real fine tethered to his million dollar mink. Was the derogatory remark Marshall used on Jackie, "trans?" How lgbtq of him. Prop Bro You changed his looks but kept Joe's drawl. The gorgeous mad mane was replaced by chemicals that flattened their splendor. He squished a bigger body and he gained an intellectual's beard. He's either hiding his identity, ready to disappear or he's playing Joe's stuntman for the final season of You. Original Joe decided to channel Cuban Pete. All he needed was a sombrero and a set of bongos between his legs. I never realized how much insignificance he applies to the person that couldn't be ladylike. I wanted to be an earplug stuck on a couch listening to the Yous whispering:

OrgU: I'm losing it brother

ProBroU: Cool it! Remember we have cages out there! Remember? (he talks low, droney and faster than it sounds)

OrgU: She's giving me anxiety. I Can't breathe. (can't breathe)

Slap!!!

Zack played a tune whose every other word was you. That's hilarious!

The king makes a cameo to show the world that he can create. 17-Apr-2023
Poor Kwame. Not for long. Hookers still exist and there is hope. Original You was a pretty creep. Super tight curls? Eh! Seems like they're hiding something. His pattern of speaking changed after the booth. He couldn't retain a lower, crisper register. I remembered because it shows up for the wedding but not for anything else. His voice is much squeakier. Did they really play serial killer music during Prop Bro's wedding decision? Friday the 13th type? Was that a heartbeat effect? Did she really call him You? Original You lives outside his head while Prop Bro You carries it like a burden. Original was modeled angelic and the other boob would be attractive if they soaped up more. Don't touch the hair, though, unless he's got unnatural stuff coming out of it. Prop has to act quickly and Original lets it build. Original is in the third stage of his assignment and Prop is one step ahead of him. Original has planted his seed but not gained ownership. 14-Apr-2023
S4E11. Prop Bro You hates strippers, especially unattractive ones. He usually eats them for lunch. When he was in the pool with Bliss he looked like he was imagining what parts of her he would fry first. If he were a serial killer that is. Chelsea kept acting the part even as a hairdresser burnt her hair. She's psychic too, like that pretty terrifying celebrity twink. She immediately pegged Kwame's sister because she was the only black woman to enter the bridal suite. 08-Apr-2023
S4E10. Somebody is a virgin because they haven't found a satisfying top. Prop Bros #3 tried to convince his fiancee's father to approve of him but he kept smiling like Joker and talking like You. Kwame found a way to excuse his fiancee's future disappointment. His mother. Jackelina is free to get fucked hard whilst Marshalll keeps looking the word up. 08-Apr-2023
S4E9. That lady Chelsea thinks that relationships are about being serviced. Kwame needs to fastball her. Marshall is petrified of vagina. Pretty eyes can't fuck. Jackelina, run! Zach is still property managing his You charisma. TG Bliss is desperate. If a man doesn't want to engage a partner in sex it's because he has an STD or doesn't have a knack for it. Dump. 07-Apr-2023
Original You's future father-in-law pegged him as a really nice guy or a serial killer. You slaughtered all of Micah's friends' vaginas in one swipe. That lady put a damper in the sportsman's itinerary of happiness by clamping down on a future litter. A contestant that was not mentally profiled accused her fiancee of not being man enough. She doesn't want attention, affection or walkouts. She wants to get banged hard. Cue sensitive fucking and mild spit. 01-Apr-2023
The women came to vamp and conquer men that will never satisfy them but hopefully, will keep them barefoot and pregnant with a ring on it. The feminist plan is to train men to lie about everything so the women can feel loved and acknowledged. A man will say anything to a woman for a steady prospective orgasm. It means less outside hookups, more money and lots of family time. The women turned the dating show into The Hunger Games because they hate other women. Hearing women fangirling to idiot things men make up, is disconcerting. The banter appeared read off a corny romance novel or movie, they memorized. When you swoon at bad singing you will regret it. Their were 2 Joes from You. One of them looked like an impassioned third Property Brother. The women that connived for them are not amused. Dude, Prop Bro is the hottest man there. It's okay. The contestants have realized that the purpose of the show is to get married and bear fucking children from all that they desire so they too can make regrettable choices in life. 15-Feb-2023

Tags: Bad Acting, Corn, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preachy, Questionable, Reality, Relationships, Religion, Sex, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Travel, Wig Crack, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Thoughtful

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17-Apr-2023


Outlast (2022-) Howl

It's Dr. Kevorkian Island for survivalists. 16-Mar-2023
I have to applaud Netflix for providing a reality show that delayed my sleeping pill by an hour and a half because I was pissed and self punishing. Every Jesus that stepped up to compete with the psychotic nation, were cancelled. It's not like real life but it is. People that cheat (at awards, merit, talent, money, sex, love, representation and telling the truth) with expectations of fair-play, doom us. Their stories are only fake to people that avoid it, it's life to everybody else. 16-Mar-2023
S1E5. The challenges are brutal, there are no individuals to root for, some of the women in charge are vindictive shit stirrers and I can't stop watching. What is the point of having women on our team if they're going to be heartless? Where's the balance? Takeover is not equality. It's that thing that happened at the White House with the white people. 15-Mar-2023

Tags: 2020s, Abuse, Action, Camp, Daddy Squish, Drama, Entertainment, Fun, Funny, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Lifestyle, Psychological, Questionable, Reality, Revenge, Sports, Stupid Funny, Supremacism, Suspense, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Funny, Writ Tough

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16-Mar-2023


Love Trip: Paris (2023-) Whimper

Wherein privileged American ladies travel abroad and are shocked that their toxic love speaks other languages. Mirko's storyline profiled him as a panty shredder. That was such a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles rip. 02-Mar-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Bad Acting, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Comfort Food, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Funny, Gay Swatch, Juvenile, LGBTQ, Lifestyle, Overcooked, Questionable, Relationships, Scary, Shrill Act, Silly, Stupid Funny

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02-Mar-2023


Love Is Blind (2020) Howl

The thigh king made a slight return and nobody thought to make the reunion a pool party. The eye king also made a return to apologize to his foreign partner for being wildly attractive. Trust no man who proposes a second time like you didn't hear him the first. A girl with no mothering capabilities surmised that her children will be small because her husband's dick is. Brennon's game is not wholesome. 15-Feb-2023
No one recognized that Bartiste is the thigh king. I know daddy looked like Pebbles Flintstone but to me he was a Bam Bam Rubble. I wanted to pull it and give him a back bath. Cole showed off his thighs too. As if. The females called Cole a good guy then tore him apart in the description." "You fat shaming hoochie fucking dirty ass broke lying motherfucker evil spawn of satan with dreamy eyes." The women were so supportive of each other that they made Cole cry. Putting Vicks on the tips of his fingertips and rubbing his eyes worked. Colleen was petrified to look Cole's way. She did it in the intro and ticked uncontrollably away. She saw those eyes. Yikes. I think she might have wet herself again. If she did that means that she suffered the whole hour without a diaper change due to the lack of commercials. Guess who's available to fuck somebody's wife? Dude, she lives alone! 09-Nov-2022
The show wastes the contestants and their guests' time by planning a fake wedding in the hopes of both parties saying yes? How humiliating. Nick's idea, wasn't it. 08-Nov-2022
S3E8. Would the thigh king agree to abort a future serial killer? No one should have the audacity to bear humans that can't exist without immense help. A lot of these kids can't communicate how they feel. We interpret how they feel. How do we know they're not saying, "I hate you, I hate you". Where's daddy? Is he working his thighs again while I suffer in pain? Yo, barbecue pork is giving the king a run for his money. What a beautiful fuck roast. Bartiste can shed some hair on Andrew's cloud puffs. Brennan looks like that but can't make any money? Ooh. Colleen was not at the club 'til 2:30 in the morning, she was washing her panties. They take forever to dry. They got wet from all the attention Cole was giving her. Both Matt and Cole were more argumentative with their fiancees than they were with each other. Their confrontation was bullshit. Matt really said, "please, I'm begging you, don't fuck my wife" and Cole said, "I won't" but thinking, "I'm gonna fuck your wife". Raven is going to regret taking an Ambien. She's gonna be woozy afterwards. Raven should have paired herself with the other thigh master if she wanted to live comfortably. We know he's a super daddy because he continuously spit it in everyone's face. Fuck other people on the side and go shopping. 06-Nov-2022
S3E7. You must become blind if you want to find love. Bartiste has cheating pork thighs, Cole has fuck all the girls silly eyes, Matt has kick your ass for being a slut ticks, Brennan's eyes turn black when nobody is looking and SK is an Ambien pill (30 minutes in your system before it knocks you out). It's about immature women that read fairy tales as children and believe them. For men, it's a "How To Pick Up Vulnerable Chicks" guide. Lie, lie, lie. 06-Nov-2022

Tags: Corn, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preachy, Questionable, Reality, Relationships, Religion, Sex, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Travel, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Thoughtful

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15-Feb-2023


Wednesday (2022-) BitesEarly Exit

S1E2. It identifies with the world of art without the soul of the artist. Tim Burton's strongpoints are macabre and whimsy. His art is diffused to welcome misguided talent and a questionable existence. Jenna Ortega had already perturbed me as a porn star, the feelings don't tingle for Wednesday at Hogwarts either. She thinks her character is a surly sour bitch when that is what all teens are. If Wednesday, is indeed, a creepmeister she would be hunting the enemy that tried to kill her, to fuck it, enslave it and torture him forever, not Buffy/Cordelia them to death. It's missing a lack of heart. 28-Nov-2022

Tags: 2020s, Bad Acting, By the Numbers, Disappointment, Early Exit, Manipulation, No Chemistry, Over the Top, Preposterous, Questionable, Silly, Tedium, Weird

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28-Nov-2022


Insiders (2021) Arf

Future homeless are secured in a glass house to compete in an experiment that has them auditioning to win money and fame. Nothing is what it seems. The actors are award winning, the contestants are frantic and the host is a delicacy. The cruelty is unbelievable. Reactions from participants are placed above their mental health. I questioned the point of the experiment. Did it want to show us how maladjusted all representation is? Are we all to blame for life's fallacies? They make you think, kill, fuck, fake, think, kill, cry, fuck, fake, rage. When emotions run high we get to see the kind of homeless they will become. The producers' fuckery is set to get inside our heads by inhabiting media stereotypes. Yo, I think it works. It's a Ring type thing. Once you watch it your cells start to die. But the host is so fabulous and I want to see more pocket daddy legs. Yeah, I'm fucked. 24-May-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Camp, Chemistry, Cliche, Crapfun, Creepy, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Discomfort, Drama, Funny, Game Show, Gay Swatch, Good Acting, Horror, Hot Swatch, Incomprehensible, Insulting, Juvenile, LGBTQ, Lifestyle, Maddening, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Over the Top, Pitchy, Preposterous, Psychological, Questionable, Reality, Revenge, Sex, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Twisty, Warbly, Weird, Wit Crack, World, Writ Tough

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24-May-2022


Moon Knight (2022-) WhimperUpgradeWoof

Papi would have made me happy doing Shakespeare in tights for all 6 episodes. He broke out of his shell and became a thespian. The imagination was resplendent, the actualization fulfilled its standards but the ending was looney. 07-May-2022
Egyptian gods and cumming every time papi speaks British. 24-Apr-2022
The second episode provided a thrill I thought it was incapable of. Papi Isaac is in my blood stream and I'm addicted to his drip. The story is an absorbing mythology that reads likes a good book. No one is showing off. It's funny and magical. Everyone is thinking. Two papi Isaacs is just one more sweet ass to squish. Anna Delvey needs to work herself into one of those mirrors. I'm digging it. 08-Apr-2022
All it proves is that papi Isaac can play Anna Delvey. 01-Apr-2022

Tags: 2020s, Action, Camp, Comic Book, Daddy Squish, Fantasy, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Good Looking Art, Hot Swatch, Indecipherable, Magnetism, Questionable, Relationships, Sentimental, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Sweet Dick Energy, Twisty, Vague, Weird, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

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07-May-2022


Grammy Awards (2022) Whimper

Tevor Noah is no longer a comedian. He patched his tongue and made fun of Brady Bunch things. If a singer arrives in a rolls royce to deliver an "I don't care" message to an ex, she's a stalker. Gaga suffered from unflattering songs. The boys established an afro contest. Yum. Nobody ever burned my hair like that! Tevor Noah comes in second because he moans in accent. Bruno Mars wins the afro daddy contest. I'll massage his roots until he climaxes or I pull them all out. The rock n roll lesbian with Sharon Stone looks was awesome. Jon Batiste wins third. Yeah, I want to see if I can reach his afro before he cums. We must stop promoting people to be themselves because that might include "I want to slap you!" 03-Apr-2022

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Award, Cancellation, Choices, Comedy, Entertainment, Hollywood, Insecurities, LGBTQ, Lifestyle, Musical, Politics, Questionable, Tired

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03-Apr-2022