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All Posts Tagged as 'Trashy'

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Love Is Blind (2020-) Howl

Forget thighs, we've got some roasted turkeys this season. Nick, you sly dog you, for teaching married eeked out men that they too can enjoy life after blind marriage.

If we have to change so much to maintain a relationship, then what is the point of being ourselves? They should add acting classes to sex education. 23-Feb-2024
E6. Unless Nick Lachey does something drastic, like wear shorts or tights, thigh season is over. Meet and greet was made uncomfortable by three Razzie nominees. Not only was AD not Barbie, she wasn't even Barbie's black friend. Petite means childlike. How could she not understand the reference? Her intense desire to get married trumped it. Clay can recognize that she is beautiful but she doesn't fulfill his type. He played along because it's better than waiting for his mother's social security check to deposit and he gets to eat fine food in paradise for free with a bombshell woman that his dick wont glide into. At the reunion, AD lent all the men her flopping attention, pinpointed her fuck target as Chelsea noticed and put one on her. The most hilarious meet and greet happened to Jimmy, his car salesman pitch, sexy tone and granite (but squishy) conceit, made it obvious to the audience that he was displeased when he saw her. He stopped before sitting to look at the camera directly and threaten it. He lied and charmed but kept giving clues to the viewers that yes, I'm no prince either but I have smooth skin, a cheeky smile, some hair, squishiness, and a pouch that's full. At the group honeymoon, Jimmy focused on AD's chest and wanted everybody to know it but especially AD and his fiancee. The way he approached AD is probably the same way he approaches all scared women wherever he goes. The first red flag was his face because all you can say to it is "what a bad boy you are" and lick his teeth. Laura is the last nominee. She did better than the guys but her compliments flitted by and bit. During the honeymoon she insinuated that fiancee's penis was as big as a baby banana. He pretended not to hear her. I can't wait until she shares the anecdote with the group. If you use gorgeous and beautiful constantly as a description it loses its validity. It's also disingenuous. Jeramy might need evaluation. His immaturity is prepubescent. It looks like someone cheats. The Lacheys must do everything in their power to bring back thighs. Never tell your girlfriends about fiancee's dick. At least two will find it secretly tempting and doable. 17-Feb-2024
S6E1. I was starting to get worried. There were no man thighs worth motorboating. TG Trevor showed up and was appropriately dressed. He knows how to play the game. The male pods' temperature should always be much higher than the women's. Matthew has great talk but is pre-recorded. Clay asked AD to confirm she was a Barbie doll. That damn movie. 19-Oct-2023

Tags: Bad Acting, Corn, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preachy, Questionable, Reality, Relationships, Religion, Sex, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Travel, Wig Crack, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Thoughtful

Filed under: TV

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23-Feb-2024


Griselda (2024-) WoofUpgradeHowl

Actors can imitate, shadow or channel. The spirit of Griselda settled methodically into Sofia's lap and guided her. Sofia sent Sofia packing to become a woman with big ideas, deadly fallouts and constant misery. Sofia adds sexy beast to a woman who suffered for her imperfections. The woman who bested men used them for protection. The males were war and sex machines for the women who freed themselves from prostitution to commit worst crimes whilst using men as shields. The series served enough tension and thought-provoking arguments to whiz by without losing it's magic. Sofia was gangbang great. I never saw Sofia. I saw a 3D character. She stymied her accent and enunciated. She rocked fashion you can feel. She kicked ass like she's done it. Her attack dog was a beautiful thing and the support were menacingly good. A woman kills when she is angry, a man kills when he has to. 09-Feb-2024
S1E3. The lady is slashing tires like a fiery latina. Good girl. 08-Feb-2024

Tags: 2020s, Action, Action Fun, Bio, Brutal, Chemistry, Crime Drama, Daddy Squish, Director's Touch, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Good Acting, Hot Swatch, Lifestyle, Macho Posing, Music Rocks, Nostalgic, Spanish, Star Watt, Suspense, Tough, Trashy, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight, Writ Tough

Filed under: TV

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09-Feb-2024


Trust (2024-) Arf

Finale. It was almost cute. 26-Jan-2024
Trusting strangers, we do it everyday. We have to trust someone for aid to move on. There's a brilliant game to be played but the show hasn't figured it out, yet. Boo, for making the hottest beast walk the plank first-time around. Another remains but he's an asshole. Millionaire got shut out of the villa's bubble and trapped in a snow globe for admitting how privileged he is. Poor thing. Unless he's a plant, it's a chilly thing. The girls and boys huddled with their own. The men were obliged to let aggression lead. The women can't do like men. They have to group and wheedle down as they see fit. They have their eye on a fellow contestant whose skillset includes a seduction of the only man worth fucking. It's ghastly. That white boy celebrated someone's heritage by annoying them with it. The old lady is a Platinum Karen. I hope the producers tip them towards their last nerve. 11-Jan-2024

Tags: 2020s, By the Numbers, Camp, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Egotistical, Emasculating, Enthusiastic, Game Show, Gay Swatch, Hilarious, Juvenile, Mean Spirited, Mystery, Revenge, Sex, Shrill Act, Silly, Trashy, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

Filed under: TV

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26-Jan-2024


Saltburn (2023) Howl

Society encourages mental illness to mingle so more people can catch it. The mystery is set up beautifully, actors are undemanding and sites are divine. Is this a sequel to Killing of a Sacred Deer? The nod was a cute wink. The cast was invested in inhabiting words, statuses, empathy and star quality. Barry Keoghan was set loose as a guest of hierarchy that investigates more than he should. The cure for anorexia is having disgusting sex. The best way to maintain a friendship is to crowd them. Barry is brave with his surprises. He gave me a hardon but then I replaced him with that french dude and I came. 25-Dec-2023

Tags: 2020s, Best In Gay, Brutal, Director's Art, Funny, Gay, Hot Swatch, Music Swings, Psychological, Relationships, Sexy, Star Stud, Star Watt, Tough, Trashy, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight

Filed under: Movies

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25-Dec-2023


Golden Bachelor, The (2023) Woof

Fuckboy! 01-Dec-2023
Daddy couldn't help himself from trying the new luggage he won on Let's Make A Deal. He showed Leslie how wires helped him move around the house and bestowed on Theresa, only sexual regard. 20-Nov-2023
Daddy gold was forced to walk and run, though I believe the run was CGI'd. Gerry was very vague when discussing how he felt about Theresa to her grandchildren and daughter. When he eye fucked Theresa's daughter she reacted like she liked it. I'm sure she wasn't listening to anything he was saying because he was saying that he wasn't in love with her mother. Either he let the cat out of the bag or he's a better actor than I thought. I ponder why Gerry is called Gary when it should be Jerry. 03-Nov-2023
Palmer didn't eyefuck anybody because he wasn't alone with them. Oh well, there's still paradise. Is the show on realtime? Do they walkie talkie what the public thinks to the producers? They made daddy walk. He only walked a few steps but every time he asked to walk a girl out he was holding on to them for dear life. When he opened the car door for a dumped, the producers rigged his suit jacket to hold him up. Good wire work. If talking about your ex on a first date is rude, why does it get a pass in old age? We found out that daddy is not made of gold, he bruises whenever a woman he doesn't care for touches him. Maybe, she's made of fire. 27-Oct-2023
What pickle ball means: Age deteriorates the quality of the vegetable, but rarely causes them to actually become unsafe for consumption IMO. Pickling is used to preserve foods and in the environment of brine, they last pretty well forever. That said, the texture and flavorings are going to get funky after a couple of years. 20-Oct-2023
Whilst the ladies were slapping old man's balls our daddy gold was sitting. When he appeared on an ATV he sat throughout. He made out with any lips that came towards him, sitting down. The rose ceremony took much longer because daddy had to sit after every rose. He pretended to be a gentleman but we know the handicapped woman helped him walk out. That lady whose daughter was getting married as she was clapping balls didn't give two shits. Mother is not a title but an action. I'm sure the son-in-law was relieved she wasn't there to fuck up his wedding. Becoming ill was karma. Not telling women playing I've Never... that she was milk intolerant was like going to an orgy and having sex with everybody whilst knowing you have crabs. Captain Sandy with a wig has munched on ladies before but is a bottom, now. A judge Judy superfan told another contestant to ziploc her joy. 20-Oct-2023
I tuned in because I wanted to survey the old hunk. There is no way a 72 year old can look that good. He's handsome, a people pleaser, tastes like Spanish Fly and wants to fuck. He proved his age when it took him about twenty minutes to put on his shoes. Good editing. Wink, wink. There were no Goldiggers amongst the 20 but I noticed a few madams and ex whores. Including younglings would have created the tension women of that age experience. Most of the elder women were loopy, defining an era that's no longer safe. I like Ellen. I don't know why but I do. One of the women looked like Captain Sandy in a black wig, the Maude impressionist was kicked out, Jesse eye-fucked the bachelor and I felt grandpa's burden. Every time he votes out an eccentric aunt, America will judge him. "The man is dumping grannies!" 30-Sep-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Cliche, Crapfun, Creepy, Drama, Enthusiastic, Mat, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Romance, Squish Alert, Star Watt, Timid, Trashy, Warbly, Weird, Writ Funny

Filed under: TV

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01-Dec-2023


Blue Beetle (2023) Bites

The pace had no time to set-up character appreciation, it had a billion particles to settle. The family dynamic was food, drink, celebration and insanity. George Lopez added comedy schtick to his act. He looked like a character booted from Bedrock because he was too loud and ornery. The breast queen should be playing Lady MacBeth not becoming a free TV actor. I can see her washing blood from her hands and implementing Elvira's cleavage cut. The rest of the family and the leads apply stereotypes without explaining them. There is no such thing as a stereotype because it's only a description of our heritage. Universal speak. Nobody passed the classic TV Q test and the silliness hardly stopped. The best of the mythology turned into a fiesta. The family went everywhere together. Really? When did they masturbate? Why did the family get superpowers? Beetle's nemesis was a bigger and badder version of himself. Couldn't we have gotten something a little different? If the production wanted to fill the female quota, why didn't they concoct some awesome female villains? He has lots and no villain is scarier than a latin woman scorned. She'll slash your tires. 27-Nov-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, Art Devoid, Bad Acting, Bad Chemistry, Brutal, By the Numbers, Camp, Cliche, Comedy, Cultural, Depressing, Dialogue Lament, Director Slouch, Enthusiastic, Fatigue, Over the Top, Physical Humor, Predictable, Preposterous, Relationships, Repetitive, Revenge, Sap, Shrill Act, Timid, Trashy, TV-like, Vague, Weird

Filed under: Movies

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27-Nov-2023


Chucky (2021-) WoofUpgrade

Jake Wheeler is becoming quite a twink daddy. Devon Evans is aging in reverse. He looks like a kid. Lexy is gutsy without a personal life to lift her up. Jennifer T. and Jennifer C. need to battle for best bitch titles. The writers toned down Jennifer's character and shenanigans and she beams because of it. Devon Sawa has the best character, up to-date. I kept seeing Sawa's name on the credits but couldn't match him to his character, until now. Wow. You mean he was the hot method actor who plays the President? He is as precise in his acting as the puppeteers were on Chucky. The lip sync is perfect, different movements are being explored and the bastard is as funny and wicked as ever. The focus of this season is The White House and aging. Love it! 03-Dec-2021

Tags: 2020s, Action Fun, Art, Brutal, Camp, Chemistry, Classic, Crapfun, Creepy, Daddy Squish, Director Art, Director's Slice, Drama, Enthusiastic, Fantasy, Fun, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay, Good Acting, Heart Writ, Hilarious, Horror, Hot Swatch, Mean Spirited, Nostalgic, Over the Top, Scary, Silly, Star Watt, Stupid Funny, Suspense, Sweet, Tough, Trashy, Twinkie, Twisty, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke, Writ Funny, Writ Thoughtful, Writ Tight, Writ Tough

Filed under: TV

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27-Oct-2023


Deep Fake Love (2023-) Woof

S1E6. The hostess melted ice like climate change and gave a grieving contestant a much appreciated mom hug. Sweet. 09-Jul-2023
S1E5. Our European brethren don't fuck around. Fright and overreaction. The moment the couples landed on Lost Island they were jittering, twitching and sweating for things that they already had. The show separates partners into Venus and Mars locations, presuming Venus is for bottoms and Mars is for tops or they could be trying to trick us and its the other way around. The object of the game is to observe footage of their frolicking partners on another planet and guess whether the footage was real or faked for cash. The reactions were so hysterical that I stopped snoring so I could laugh. Latinos invented drama by spelling it. The first time they go into the White Room, they are shown footage of their counterparts in real or inappropriate interactions. Things get dicey when the real clips got racier than the fake ones and the tricks are on them. The test doesn't want to fix the relationship but the individual. Why does the gay couple only get one temptation? I'd expect two each, at least. The hostess is a chillmeister. The contestants were crying hysterically after watching shocking footage and instead of being motherly she pushed them to answer if they thought it was real or fake. She's the only one that got wardrobe money, too. 08-Jul-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Bad Acting, Brutal, Camp, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Foreign, From Another Planet, Fun Acting, Funny, Gay Swatch, Hot Swatch, Over the Top, Reality, Relationships, Romance, Sex, Shrill Act, Squish Alert, Trashy, Twisty, Writ Funny

Filed under: TV

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09-Jul-2023


Fright (1971) Arf

It predated classics that trumped it. It was a template for the future. It was also a piece of junk. It was a film full of ideas that had to bombastically announce them. Michael Myers lived in a multi-verse where Laurie Strode "is" his sister. He kidnaps her, a baby, rapes her in front of the child and recoils until he's horny again. Did she give birth to Michael Myers, Jr. from multi-verse Halloweens? There was a glimmer of Joker's "dance with the devil" choreography. It made babysitting a shitty job. The privileged are forced to hire child haters. The child was adorable even when being manhandled by all sorts of creepy adults. The house is where you want to film it, Susan George didn't need to act and everybody needed to tone it down. 04-Jul-2023

Tags: 1970s, Accidental Watch, Action Fun, Cheeky Acting, Coincidence Laden, Crapfun, Director Experiment, Drama, Funny, Sort of, Horror, Loud, Over the Top, Revenge, Scare Obvious, Shrill Act, Star Watt, Trashy, Words Spoke, Writ w/Possibilities

Filed under: Movies

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04-Jul-2023


Married At First Sight UK (2015-) Woof

Reunion. I was put off that Hades and his minions had ceased to judge then I realized that not all foreign reality shows are made in the cryptic depths of Australia. The black judge is either gay or giddy. Jordan thinks that his supremacism won't show if he romances the same black subject five years later. George escaped from the Arkham Asylum. No George, you cannot control this chick because you can't sexually satisfy her. Kwame has James Bond issues. The lesbians are happy with any kind of pussy, even if it doesn't eat dog food. Hey judges, gay men can marry sisters but they fuck men. The pronoun starts with cis. If the lesbians can get one with a bow tie we can get one lousy butch. They exist. They made us. The supremacist stopped the show by being supreme. He dumped a weighty issue by adopting a more politically correct one. Thou mustn't abuse the power called race. We're running away together, bitch! If you complain you'll sound like a racist because she's black! Instant GET OUT OF JAIL card. 16-Jun-2023

Tags: 2010s, 2020s, Brutal, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Discomfort, Egotistical, Fun Acting, Funny, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Juvenile, Lifestyle, Pitchy, Predictable, Relationships, Romance, Silly, Tacky, Trashy, Writ Basic

Filed under: TV

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16-Jun-2023


Muted (2023-) WhimperEarly Exit

As soon as I confused the boyfriend with the main character, I booked. Dude, I thought his marks were fake. Wow, he looked better in the past. Boo, I just insulted a person. They were both lovelies. I was watching on a different wavelength. I didn't want to have to rethink my imaginary flashbacks. The lady in charge of investigation hinted that it was schlock anyway. 31-May-2023

Tags: 2020s, Accidental Watch, Cliche, Crime Drama, Drama, Early Exit, Gay, LGBTQ, Mystery, Pretty, Sexy, Star Watt, Tedium, Timid, Trashy, Warbly, Weird

Filed under: TV

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31-May-2023


Airport 1975 (1974) Woof

Charlton Heston played a super cowboy that had no time for women frivolities. His frivolity is mad at him because all he ever wants is sex. Karen Black is the girl who gets fucked a lot because she loves a man that wont commit. Wait until she sees what happens to the plane. Karen Black was naturally unhinged, vocal, a badge of courage under unwilling circumstances and an extra effect. She battled both sides of her conscience making it jittery. What it lacks in effects, it makes up for with tension. Gloria Swanson was onboard to play herself, Norma Desmond. Linda Blair was paid to lay down and listen to lesbian folk songs. George Kennedy returned to bark. Erik Estrada played a married horny pig. Christopher Norris was sparkly. The male comics were silly. TG disaster struck. 31-May-2023

Tags: 2020s, Action, Camp, Chemistry, Crapfun, Daddy Squish, Director Movement, Disaster, Drama, Enthusiastic, Funny, Good Acting, Music Swings, Relationships, Sequel, Star Watt, Suspense, Thriller, Trashy, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Words Spoke

Filed under: Movies

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31-May-2023


Adam Had Four Sons (1941) Arf

It zipped through chapters as if only one page was allowed for each. They wasted Ingrid Bergman's haloed face and Susan Hayward's whiskey voiced bad girl. 19 year old governess develops feelings for a grandpa daddy, his perfect boys and ailing wife. The boys become attached and she becomes like family. She weaves in and out of their lives spanning years of separation. She returns to some really handsome adult sons and never aging grandpa for no reason other than a promise and bottled up hope. The brothers are fighting the war and a brother has brought a disruption into their home. Susan Hayward is that thing that keeps it chaotic while laughing about it. I didn't know it was a custom, in the 1900's, for women to kiss men on the mouth willy nilly. It was so ahead of its time I couldn't stop laughing. She made out with grandpa or any attractive man or boy that looked her way. She marries one, seduces another and maybe another until it becomes deadly. It squeezed too much history and information to empathize with and the bitch showdown consisted of Ingrid Bergman packing the whore's clothes and maybe shoving her down the stairs. 20-Apr-2023

Tags: 1940s, Accidental Watch, Camp, Chemistry, Crapfun, Drama, Funny, Sort of, Hot Swatch, Relationships, Romance, Star Watt, Trashy, Wit Crack, Wit Snit

Filed under: Movies

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20-Apr-2023


Love Is Blind (2020) Howl

Reunion. Kwame was looking real fine tethered to his million dollar mink. Was the derogatory remark Marshall used on Jackie, "trans?" How lgbtq of him. Prop Bro You changed his looks but kept Joe's drawl. The gorgeous mad mane was replaced by chemicals that flattened their splendor. He squished a bigger body and he gained an intellectual's beard. He's either hiding his identity, ready to disappear or he's playing Joe's stuntman for the final season of You. Original Joe decided to channel Cuban Pete. All he needed was a sombrero and a set of bongos between his legs. I never realized how much insignificance he applies to the person that couldn't be ladylike. I wanted to be an earplug stuck on a couch listening to the Yous whispering:

OrgU: I'm losing it brother

ProBroU: Cool it! Remember we have cages out there! Remember? (he talks low, droney and faster than it sounds)

OrgU: She's giving me anxiety. I Can't breathe. (can't breathe)

Slap!!!

Zack played a tune whose every other word was you. That's hilarious!

The king makes a cameo to show the world that he can create. 17-Apr-2023
Poor Kwame. Not for long. Hookers still exist and there is hope. Original You was a pretty creep. Super tight curls? Eh! Seems like they're hiding something. His pattern of speaking changed after the booth. He couldn't retain a lower, crisper register. I remembered because it shows up for the wedding but not for anything else. His voice is much squeakier. Did they really play serial killer music during Prop Bro's wedding decision? Friday the 13th type? Was that a heartbeat effect? Did she really call him You? Original You lives outside his head while Prop Bro You carries it like a burden. Original was modeled angelic and the other boob would be attractive if they soaped up more. Don't touch the hair, though, unless he's got unnatural stuff coming out of it. Prop has to act quickly and Original lets it build. Original is in the third stage of his assignment and Prop is one step ahead of him. Original has planted his seed but not gained ownership. 14-Apr-2023
S4E11. Prop Bro You hates strippers, especially unattractive ones. He usually eats them for lunch. When he was in the pool with Bliss he looked like he was imagining what parts of her he would fry first. If he were a serial killer that is. Chelsea kept acting the part even as a hairdresser burnt her hair. She's psychic too, like that pretty terrifying celebrity twink. She immediately pegged Kwame's sister because she was the only black woman to enter the bridal suite. 08-Apr-2023
S4E10. Somebody is a virgin because they haven't found a satisfying top. Prop Bros #3 tried to convince his fiancee's father to approve of him but he kept smiling like Joker and talking like You. Kwame found a way to excuse his fiancee's future disappointment. His mother. Jackelina is free to get fucked hard whilst Marshalll keeps looking the word up. 08-Apr-2023
S4E9. That lady Chelsea thinks that relationships are about being serviced. Kwame needs to fastball her. Marshall is petrified of vagina. Pretty eyes can't fuck. Jackelina, run! Zach is still property managing his You charisma. TG Bliss is desperate. If a man doesn't want to engage a partner in sex it's because he has an STD or doesn't have a knack for it. Dump. 07-Apr-2023
Original You's future father-in-law pegged him as a really nice guy or a serial killer. You slaughtered all of Micah's friends' vaginas in one swipe. That lady put a damper in the sportsman's itinerary of happiness by clamping down on a future litter. A contestant that was not mentally profiled accused her fiancee of not being man enough. She doesn't want attention, affection or walkouts. She wants to get banged hard. Cue sensitive fucking and mild spit. 01-Apr-2023
The women came to vamp and conquer men that will never satisfy them but hopefully, will keep them barefoot and pregnant with a ring on it. The feminist plan is to train men to lie about everything so the women can feel loved and acknowledged. A man will say anything to a woman for a steady prospective orgasm. It means less outside hookups, more money and lots of family time. The women turned the dating show into The Hunger Games because they hate other women. Hearing women fangirling to idiot things men make up, is disconcerting. The banter appeared read off a corny romance novel or movie, they memorized. When you swoon at bad singing you will regret it. Their were 2 Joes from You. One of them looked like an impassioned third Property Brother. The women that connived for them are not amused. Dude, Prop Bro is the hottest man there. It's okay. The contestants have realized that the purpose of the show is to get married and bear fucking children from all that they desire so they too can make regrettable choices in life. 15-Feb-2023

Tags: Bad Acting, Corn, Crapfun, Cultural, Daddy Squish, Drama, Funny, Hilarious, Hot Swatch, Insulting, Manipulation, Mean Spirited, Over the Top, Preachy, Questionable, Reality, Relationships, Religion, Sex, Shrill Act, Silly, Squish Alert, Stupid Funny, Tacky, Trashy, Travel, Wig Crack, Wit Crack, Wit Snit, Writ Thoughtful

Filed under: TV

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17-Apr-2023


Another Man's Poison (1951) Whimper

Bette's 50s era was full of Lady Davis folklore and drag queen reboots. Lady Davis was forced to compete with herself. A worn out hunk has beef with her husband because he foiled a heist and he's being blamed. Bette is at the height of shifty. She parlays her caricature tics to mixed effects. She is over until somebody fucks with her animal. The feelings reeled a barracuda out of her. The camera decided that Bette's gift was mechanical and that the new way was better. They highlighted her flaws and disheveled her tidiness. The disclosures felt possibly true, Bette's messy art was always entertaining but it's a crappy movie. 10-Apr-2023

Tags: 1950s, By the Numbers, Camp, Corn, Crapfun, Crime Drama, Director Insanity, Drama, Mystery, Over the Top, Psychological, Relationships, Repetitive, Revenge, Star Watt, Suspense, Tacky, Timid, Trashy, Twisty, Wit Crack, Words Spoke

Filed under: Movies

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10-Apr-2023




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